The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom (41 page)

Soon afterward, a grand parade was held outside Castle Sturmhagen. Tremendous flower arrangements adorned every corner along the parade route, and a marching band raised their horns in a musical victory salute. Nearly the entire population of Sturmhagen—as well as hundreds of cheering admirers from neighboring kingdoms—turned out for the celebration. They all saw the banners that read
HOORAY FOR CINDERELLA AND HER LEAGUE OF PRINCES
!

“It figures. We’re still second fiddle to the girl,” Gustav said. “No offense.”

“None taken,” said Ella. “Sorry about this, guys. I had no idea. I don’t even want to be famous.”

“It’s fine,” Liam said. “These people are here today to celebrate all of us.”

“And they finally know our names,” Frederic said. “Gustav, I do believe you’re now officially the biggest hero in your family.”

That got a smile out of the big man.

The guests of honor rode in the back of an ornate, open-top coach pulled by a team of headdress-wearing show horses. Ella and the princes waved to their adoring public as they rolled by. Frederic was pleasantly surprised to see Reginald at the front of the crowd.

“Reginald, I’m so touched you came,” Frederic called to him. The valet left the crowd and jogged up to the side of the coach.

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Reginald replied, beaming proudly.

“I don’t suppose Father is here, too,” Frederic asked, with a tinge of hopefulness.

“No,” Reginald said, bobbing along next to the moving coach. “He wanted me to tell you he forgives you and can’t wait to see you home again. But don’t trust him completely. He also asked me to deliver this note to the Flimsham brothers; he wants to borrow their tiger again.”

“Thanks for the heads-up,” Frederic said, as the parade moved on and Reginald dropped back into the crowd.

They rounded a busy corner to see even more fawning fans and giddy celebrants. Huge tapestries bearing the likeness of the princes were rolled down from the upper windows of the castle as they passed.

“Well, going home after this may not be as much fun as I’d hoped,” Frederic said.

“At least you have a home to go to,” Liam said. “Based on what Lila said, my people are going to force me to marry Briar Rose if I set foot anywhere near Erinthia.” He sighed. “What am I going to do?”

“Why don’t you come home and stay with me in Harmonia until things calm down in your kingdom?” Frederic said. “I can always use an ally against my father, anyway.”

“Thank you, Frederic,” Liam replied gratefully. “I think I will.”

Ella leaned forward. “You know, Frederic,” she said. “Maybe I was hasty in leaving. I think I’ll return to the palace with you, too. If you’ll have me back.”

Considering all they’d been through, he wondered if maybe there was a chance for him and Ella to end up together after all. He would have to work extra hard to stand out next to Liam, he knew, but for the first time in his life, he felt up to the challenge.

“Two of my best friends living with me? I can’t think of anything I’d like more,” Frederic said. “Oh, but I should tell you both: If a sprite ever comes to the door, don’t send her away. She’ll be delivering a message for me.”

“Hey! Someone in the crowd is carrying a ‘Duncan the Daring’ sign!” Duncan shouted. “Oh, it’s Frank,” he added, less enthusiastically. “Do you think he means it in the good way?”

“Hard to say with those guys,” Liam said. “But
we
all believe it, right?”

Gustav rolled his eyes.

The parade ended at a large stone platform, on top of which stood a life-size statue of Cinderella and the four princes standing in heroic poses. The sculpture had been somewhat hastily constructed the previous day. The coach came to a stop, and the heroes disembarked. They climbed the steps of the platform to get a closer look at the artwork.

“Hey, Statue Me is taller than
Me
Me,” Duncan said. “I like that.”

Fig. 42 Honor STATUE

“Criminy Pete!” Gustav cursed. “They couldn’t have made me with hair? It’s starting to grow back, you know.” “what in the world is this statue made of?” Liam asked as he poked at his alter ego and heard a hollow thunking sound.

“I believe that would be papier-mâché,” Frederic said. “Considering how little time they had to prepare, I suppose this was the best we could get.”

“Let’s hope it doesn’t rain,” Liam said.

Ella quietly stepped down from the platform to give the guys their moment in the spotlight. The princes faced the enormous crowd. People were waving, cheering, and calling their names—their
real
names. Not one “Prince Charming” was heard.

At one point or another, each of the four princes had dreamed of a moment like this. But it was more than just the hordes of fans that made the moment so wonderful. Duncan expressed the sentiment perfectly:

“I’m with these guys!” he shouted, his arms raised high in the air.

Some people in the audience started chuckling. The princes assumed they were mocking Duncan.

“Yeah, the Flighty Flutist over here is a friend of mine,” Gustav sniffed defensively. “So what?”

More crowd members began to laugh, and several started pointing.

Liam and Frederic looked at each other, confused.

The princes turned around in time to see two black-clad thieves pick up the lightweight statue and heave it into a wagon that was parked right behind the platform—a wagon that was already filled to the brim with oversize flower arrangements, “League of Princes” banners, dozens of trumpets, and four enormous personalized tapestries with the princes’ faces on them. At the driver’s seat of that wagon was Deeb Rauber.

“That’s right, princes,” the smirking boy yelled. “I just stole you! In fact, I stole your whole parade. While you losers were celebrating, I was riding behind you, snatching everything!” He guffawed and wiggled his backside at them, as his henchmen jumped onto waiting horses. Then Rauber and his bandits tore off with the goods.

“I knew you should have let me crush him,” Gustav grumbled.

Ella dashed back onto the platform to join the men. “What the heck is my cousin doing here?”

“Your
what
?” Frederic gasped.

“I’m telling your mom, Deeb!” she called out, as Rauber’s wagon disappeared down the road.

“What are we standing here for?” Liam shouted. “We can’t let Rauber get away.” He was about to run after the thieves when he heard jeers from the crowd.

“Ha-ha! A little kid just swiped their statue!”

“I thought they
stopped
the Bandit King!”

“These are supposed to be our heroes? What a joke!”

Before long, the entire crowd seemed to be laughing at them. Worst of all, Pennyfeather the Mellifluous was there, and he started feverishly scribbling down ideas for a new song.

“Oh, no,” Liam groused when he saw Pennyfeather. “Not
this
! You’re not going to write a song about
this
now, are you?”

“Here we go again,” Gustav muttered.

“It wasn’t a very good statue anyway,” Frederic said.

“We should get that giant to make a new one,” Duncan suggested, but the others could barely hear him over the roars of laughter.

Just then all sixteen of Gustav’s brothers marched up onto the platform. For a brief, reality-twisting moment, Gustav thought they might actually be there to defend him. He was wrong, of course.

“Everybody, quiet,” Henrik shouted. “We have something very special for you all.”

Lyrical Leif, Tyrese the Tuneful, Wallace Fitzwallace, and Reynaldo, Duke of Rhyme all sashayed onto the now very crowded platform. Leif came to the forefront and addressed the crowd.

“Ladies and gentlemen,” the bard said. “A little over a week ago, my fellow songsmiths and I suffered through an incredibly harrowing experience as we were all kidnapped by a devious witch. But our lives were saved, thanks to a group of brave and stalwart heroes. And to show our gratitude, my fellow bards and I teamed up to write the ultimate story-song. We present it to you now. Ladies and gentlemen: ‘The Sixteen Hero Princes of Sturmhagen’!”

“Sixteen?” Gustav howled, as the four bards began singing together. “SIXTEEN?”

Gustav seemed as if he were about to tackle all the bards and snap their mandolins with his teeth, but Liam and Frederic held him back.

“Well, now what?” Frederic asked.

“Rauber’s long gone, I’m sure,” Liam said mournfully.

“And we’re laughingstocks again,” Gustav grumbled.

“It’s a disaster,” Liam said. “Where do we go from here?”

“Someplace where people like us?” Duncan suggested with a cautious grin.

Frederic’s eyes brightened. “You’re right,” he said. “I know just where we should go.”

EPILOGUE

P
RINCE
C
HARMING
G
OES
W
HERE
E
VERYBODY
K
NOWS
H
IS
N
AME

L
iam, Frederic, Gustav, and Duncan stepped across the threshold of the Stumpy Boarhound and were greeted by a raucous round of applause (cheering that got even louder when Ella entered as well).

“Oh, we were so hopin’ you would come back,” Ripsnard the bartender said jubilantly.

“I take it you’ve heard the new song about us?” Liam asked.

“Heard it? Business has been booming because of it,” Ripsnard said. He pointed to a hand-painted sign that hung over the bar between a dented shield and a mounted yeti head. It read:
THE STUMPY BOARHOUND
—
BIRTHPLACE OF THE LEAGUE OF PRINCES
. “To be truthful, we sorta owe you guys.”

“Yeah, I’ve gotten dozens of new recruits for me crew in the past week,” the bearded pirate chimed in. “When gawkers pop in to check out the official League of Princes Founding Table back there in the corner, I flash ’em me gappy smile and say, ‘Yep, that tooth got knocked out by Prince Gustav the Mighty.’”

Gustav grinned.

“Well, this is what we wanted, right?” Frederic said as dozens of the Boarhound’s regulars swarmed them for autographs. “A hero’s welcome?”

“Yeah, but what happens when they find out about what went down at the parade?” Liam asked as he signed the handle of a thief’s dagger.

“Ya mean the Bandit King swipin’ yer statue right out from under ya?” the pirate asked.

“You know about that already?” Ella asked. “That happened this morning.”

“News travels fast,” said Ripsnard.

“They know about it and they still like us,” Duncan said, high-fiving the half-ogre thug.