The P.J. Stone Gates Trilogy (#1-3) (71 page)

President Wexington’s fist slammed down on the desk with enough force to make the entire piece of furniture shake in protest. “Why is she not dead yet? And why is the stone not in our possession?”

A tall skinny man called Ethan grimaced at his master’s outburst. “The Red Dragon known as Khol figured out our plan.”

“And what do you plan to do now?” The President demanded before Ethan could say anything else in way of explanation. “That stone—if they figure out what they have in their possession—well I don’t think I have to tell you what that means for all of us.”

Ethan swallowed down his nerves as best he could. “Yes, I’m aware. But the good news is that it appears the stone has been in their hands since their Queen was at your son’s school. It bodes well that they haven’t figured it out yet, maybe their race is just as we suspected, too stupid to figure out they hold the key to evicting us from our positions here.”

“It’s something we can’t risk!” The President bellowed. “Fix your mistake, get me that stone, and kill their Queen. She and the stone are the only hope any of them have. If we remove both of them then none of them, not even the dragons, will be of any real threat.”

“Yes. I understand.” Ethan responded in a shaky voice. “I won’t fail you like any of the others. I know what it would mean for me.”

The President grinned an unpleasant smile, which was really little more than him baring his teeth. “Good. Then everything is clear, and understood. Leave me, and don’t return with any more bad news.”

Ethan left the oval office pale and shaking.

Waking up alone, after experiencing the intimacy of sleeping in the arms of the man you love, has to be one of the worst things about losing someone. When Bryn was still alive, and we weren’t together, sometimes I would wake up missing him, but there was always the hope that one day I’d be in his arms again. Now … well that hope had been dashed forever.

I shivered and curled into a small ball under the covers, even though I wasn’t physically cold, just emotionally bereft. My thoughts flowed from being in Bryn’s arms to being in Khol’s. Waking up in Khol’s arms hadn’t been the worst thing in the world. In fact, it had been pretty amazing. He had a way of making me feel so safe and treasured. And it’s not that when I was with Bryn I didn’t feel that way too, but it was just with Khol … well there was something comforting in the way he seemed to always know exactly what I needed, even when I didn’t. Maybe it was my pregnancy hormones, but being taken care of in the manner that Khol did … well I kind of liked it. I’d always felt a woman should be able to take care of herself, which I still do, but it’s also nice to know that I can always depend on Khol completely. The only thing that I hated to admit, especially with Bryn being dead, was that Bryn leaving me, no matter the noble reason behind it, had made me feel as if I couldn’t depend on him completely. Some part of the trust had been broken. In the end it hadn’t mattered. I’d chosen him for my
Anam Cara
, but I couldn’t deny that where Bryn had lacked, Khol excelled.

My skin hummed with the awareness of Khol’s eminent arrival. Did he know I was thinking about him? Or was he sensing my emotional turmoil? “My little Queen,” Khol rasped as he appeared out of my line of sight and slid in behind me to take me in his arms. He pulled my small frame tightly against his muscled chest, and inhaled deeply as he pressed his face into my mass of sleep-tangled hair.

I burrowed deeper into the covers and Khol’s warmth as I let my eyes slide shut. “Don’t you have research that you should be concentrating on?” I mumbled.

“I’m taking a break.” Khol stated simply, but I knew he was really here to comfort me. Khol’s large hand slid under the covers, around my hip, and came to rest on my slightly protruding belly. “How is he?” Khol asked with a noted increase of tenderness in his voice. “Can you feel him moving yet?”

I brought my smaller hand to rest over his. “I’m not sure I’m far enough along for that to happen yet. I really don’t know.”

“Do you need anything, my little Queen? Are you comfortable? Hungry?” Khol began slowly rubbing my belly and my whole body quivered deliciously as his magic skimmed lightly over my skin.

The truth was, I didn’t know what I’d ever do without Khol. Since he stepped into my life he hadn’t left my side, no matter what was going on between us. His devotion to me was almost overwhelming. Here was a man that would do anything I asked of him, and yet I couldn’t bring myself to give him the one thing he desired most from me … my heart. I almost … almost wished I could push Bryn out of my mind. I felt disloyal for even considering that, but I couldn’t help the longing I had to just be content. I knew Khol would do everything in his power to keep me content, if not make me happy. Could I be happy with Khol? Truly happy? I mentally shook myself. How could I be thinking about being happy when the world was in the current state of chaos caused by the Riders, one of which was living inside of Jenna? Maybe I hadn’t grown up or changed as much as I though I had, because apparently I was still capable of being completely shallow and selfish.

“Khol,” I said as I squirmed away from his tight embrace, his hand sliding away from me. “We need to find the answers to the necklace stuff. It’s selfish of me to get so wrapped up in myself.”

Khol reached out and pulled me back against the hard expanse of his chest. “There are times when being selfish is completely acceptable. For instance when you need to recharge yourself so you can be at full mental and physical capacity to deal with the problems at hand. You’re not helping anyone if you continue to unravel.”

I ground my teeth together. “I hate it when you do that.”

“What?” Khol asked with amusement.

“Make your side of things sound completely logical.”

Khol chucked low beside my ear, causing goose bumps to race across my skin. “It’s not that hard to do when logic
is
on my side.”

“I miss him, Khol. And I’m sorry that you have to hear about it, but I just don’t have anyone else to really talk to.” I rolled onto my back and gazed up into Khol’s pensive face. His eyes swept over me and his lips curled up slightly.

“He was your best friend. Of course you miss him. I’m not asking you to forget him. And I know I can never replace him, but I can be something new to you … something incomparable.”

I reached up and ran the tips of my fingers along the side of his jaw. He was so beautiful, and so familiar to me now. It was as if I’d known him my entire life. “As you keep saying … it’s just …” I flicked my gaze away from him. “… I don’t know. I can’t seem to sort my feelings out.”

“No one’s asking you to,” Khol paused as if to consider what he would say next. “I’m just asking you to let me love you.”

I sighed in frustration. Khol made it sound so simple … if only. “But I know what you really want Khol, you want—”

“Yes, for you to be my
Anam Cara
and for you to be happy. Because being my
Anam Cara
would make you happy.” Khol cupped my cheek and brought my face back towards him. He dipped his head and skimmed his lips over mine. Even the slight contact had me reacting to him. My hands rose up and slid into his hair on their own volition. I closed my eyes to receive a real kiss from him. A kiss that didn’t come.

My eyelids fluttered back open reluctantly, and I took in the image of Khol studying me from inches away with an expectant and wistful expression. “What are you doing?” I whispered with annoyance.

“Waiting,” he rumbled low.

“For what?” I snapped. He needed to just kiss me already.

Disappointment flashed in the depths of his dragon green eyes. “I guess I have longer to wait.” He stood abruptly and disappeared.

I sat up, my weight on my forearms as I swore under my breath. “What the hell was that about? What was he waiting for exactly?” But of course no answer was forthcoming.

I grumbled and huffed before sliding back down into the comforting fluff of my bed. More sleep … that’s what I needed.

“Peej.”

“Bryn!” I joyfully exclaimed as I hurtled myself into his awaiting arms. I immediately started to sob when my face was pressed into his chest. “I know it’s a dream, but I miss you so much Bryn.”

His arms tightened around me. “I’ve missed you too.” He inhaled and exhaled before speaking. “This isn’t a regular dream.”

“Yeah, okay.” I mumbled into his now wet shirt.

“What I mean is that it’s really me. I mean, yeah, I’m dead, but I’m still here in your dream.”

“Dream you isn’t aloud to talk about you being dead.” I said with irritation.

“Okay, yeah, maybe I’m not saying this right, but I’m visiting you in your dream, Peej. This is really me.”

I pulled back enough out of his arms to stare up at his face, but I didn’t want to lose the contact of his skin on mine. “I wish.” I murmured as I took in the face of the boy I’d known practically all of my life, and would never see again outside of dreams like this. His strong sculpted jaw line and high cheekbones, his full supple lips, his jet back hair that was currently falling forward into his sea storm eyes. How I longed for his image to be more than a memory conjured up by my sleeping mind.

“I don’t have much time so you’re going to have to pay attention, Peej.” Longing washed over his beautiful features as he brought up his thumb to brush over my bottom lip. “I’m not supposed to help, not supposed to come to you. It’s against the rules—” He chuckled darkly. “—but when have we ever followed the rules?”

“I’m not really sure I believe anything you’re saying, because I think you’re just a part of a really weird dream, but I’ll take seeing you whether it’s real or not.”

Bryn smiled and shook his head at me. “Same old Peej.” His face then smoothed out into serious lines. “Okay … first of all … I need to tell you that I love you and I—”

“I love you too!” I interrupted but Bryn brought a finger up to effectively quiet me.

“Just listen, Peej. I really don’t have a lot of time.” I nodded once in acknowledgement and he continued on. “I love you but I’m not an option anymore with me being dead and all. I want you to be happy. He’ll make you happy.”

“Khol?” I whispered completely flabbergasted. “You’re claiming to have come to me just to tell me you’re okay with me being with Khol? More like my subconscious is trying to dream something up … quite literally apparently … to help me with my feelings of guilt for wanting him at all.”

“Just listen.” Bryn responded with agitation, running his hands through his hair. “That’s not the only reason I came, but I had to tell you while I was here. I can’t take seeing you so miserable. I need you to be happy Peej. You still have a life, and I don’t.” I stared at him in silence as he continued speaking. “A lot of things become clear after you’re dead. And one of them for me is that some things are inevitable. Like you and Khol being together. It was going to happen at some point no matter the choices either of us made. You’re fated, and that’s rare.”

“No! You and I are fated! You and—”

“Obviously not. If we were fated then we’d be together.” Pain and longing rippled across his features briefly.  “But enough about that, I can’t say anymore, I don’t have enough time. What I need to tell you is that you’re on the right track with the necklace but you’ll be faced with a choice, a choice that’ll be the hardest decision you’ve ever had to make. Choose him.”