The Promises We Keep (Made for Love Book 1) (88 page)

“
Is that
—
?
”

“
I can explain!
”
I spit out. My heart is beating so fast, I
’
m afraid it might quit from exhaustion any second, now. I didn
’
t plan on starting the conversation this way.
Then again, I didn
’
t really have a plan past showing up and saying hello.

“
Avery?
”

His tone of voice makes me want to cry even more. I can feel it the second my lip starts to tremble and I know I won
’
t be able to hold it together for long.
“
Sonny,
”
I whimper. I try and take a deep breath in order to pull myself together, but all I can manage are short and shallow intakes of air.
“
I took it out of the trash on Saturday. I didn
’
t throw it away.
”

“
I see that. Why?
”

“
I thought you might have just been acting impulsively,
”
I begin to explain, turning the envelope over in my hands repeatedly.
“
I thought maybe you
’
d change your mind.
”

“
Well, I haven
’
t.
”
He extends his hand, implying that he would like me to hand it over. I know he hasn
’
t noticed the jagged edge across the top that tells the story of my invasion and I know the worst is yet to come.

“
What are you going to do with it?
”

“
Throw it away. I told you, I don
’
t care what
’
s in there. I
’
m not opening it. Will you please give it to me?
”

I can
’
t breathe anymore. My lungs feel like they
’
re being constricted by my tears. I try and blink the excess moisture from my eyes, but I can
’
t blink fast enough.
“
You can
’
t throw it away.
”
My voice comes out so soft, I
’
m not sure he hears me until he furrows his brow in question.

“
And why is that, Avery?
”

“
Because. Because you need to read it.
”
As soon as the words are out of my mouth, his eyes dart down to the item in question. His body stiffens and I know that he knows I opened it.
“
If you want to throw it away after you read it, I won
’
t say a word, but there are things
—”

He pushes out a heavy sigh as his shoulders drop in disappointment. The look he's giving me now makes me want to dig a hole and bury myself in it.
“
You read it?
”

He already knows what I
’
m going to say. I know it. He wants to hear me say it, anyway, and I can
’
t refuse him.
“
Yes.
”

“
When?
”

“
Yesterday,
”
I whisper. When he lowers himself to sit on the edge of the bed, my heart drops. I know that I
’
ve hurt him with this betrayal
—
but
seeing
the effects of my actions is so much worse than imagining them. He won
’
t even look at me now.

“
I told you that I didn
’
t want to read it. I meant it. Regardless of what it says, I won
’
t change my mind.
”

“
But Sonny
—”

“
No, Avery,
”
he states, bringing his eyes up to meet mine. His steady gaze isn
’
t exactly cold, but it
’
s far from warm and endearing.
“
You should have just left it alone.
”

“
But
—”

“
Stop fighting me on this,
”
he insists as he stands and snatches the envelope out of my grasp.
“
I don
’
t want to talk about it anymore.
”

When he poises his hands to rip the whole thing in half, I lung toward him, cupping my hands over his.
“
No!
”
I cry out.
“
You can
’
t! You have to read it. You have
siblings
, Grayson!
”

His head jerks up and his eyes grow wide in what can only be shock.
“
What?
”
I don
’
t hear the word; I only see it on his lips.

“
You have two brothers and a sister. Your mom is married. They live in Wyoming. Grayson, you
have
to read the letter.
”
For a moment, he doesn
’
t speak and I can
’
t take my eyes off of him. In the silence, I watch as my words become real to him
—
and the look he gives me when what I
’
ve said sinks in
…

It. Breaks. My. Heart.

Literally, I think my organ has been pulled into pieces just at the sight of what I
’
ve done. There isn
’
t an ounce of joy or peace or love in his gaze. Even worse, there isn
’
t any anger or pain, either. There isn
’
t
anything
. My favorite green eyes have never looked
less
remarkable.

I did that. I just stole the light from his eyes.

“
Sonny?
”

“
Get out.
”

The sob I
’
ve managed to swallow until now fights its way to freedom at his demand.
“
Sonny
—”

“
Avery, get out,
”
he repeats, pulling his hands away from my touch.

“
Sonny, I
’
m sorry!
”

He shakes his head at me as if to deny acceptance of my apology.
“
I didn
’
t know it was possible for you to make me feel this way.
”

I don
’
t think I
’
ve ever been as devastated as I am in this moment.

What have I done?

“
If you won
’
t leave, I will,
”
he mumbles, dejectedly.

Before I can stop him, he
’
s gone.

I
hear
her before the front door even opens. I hurry out of my room, just in time to see her race into hers
—
slamming the door behind her. My heart drops. I think back to the worried look she had in her eyes before she left. I knew that this conflict would be a big deal
—
but I didn
’
t know that the aftermath would explode to this magnitude.

When Sarah comes out of her room and joins me just outside her door, we exchange a look. Suddenly, all the things that have gone unsaid between us seem to vanish entirely. Right now, we
’
re needed as a united front
—
and
that
is understood without a single word.

“
What happened?
”
she asks, concern tugging at her brow.

“
I think they
’
re in the middle of their first big fight.
”

“
Fight
. Really? Okay. That
’
s new.
”
She nods her head and I can tell she
’
s already starting to plot her next move.
“
I
’
m going to need some ice cream. Vanilla. Could you run down the street really quick? I
’
ll start baking.
”

“
You got it. I
’
ll be back in a few.
”

Me:
Hey. How
’
s Ave?

My Girl:
Miserable. :( And Gray?

It
’
s been almost forty-eight hours since Gray and Ave got into their first fight.
And boy, is it a hell-of-a first fight
. Gray refuses to talk about it. I only know bits and pieces of what happened from Jack and Addie. I don
’
t think it
’
s a matter of Gray not trusting me with the details, he
’
s just too overwhelmed to discuss them. This was not an ideal week for him and his girl to be at odds.

Me:
Same. Walking zombie.