The Secret She Kept (8 page)

“Y
OU DIDN’T HAVE TO STAY
,” Savannah said grudgingly as she walked Jake to the door of her place. He’d waited in the living room while she’d tucked Allie and Logan into bed.

“Oh, I know.”

She stepped out into the hallway with him, then shut the door. “So why did you?”

“Thought I’d apologize.”

“For?”

They descended the concrete stairs to the driveway in silence. His bike was pulled up along the edge.

“Exposing your children to the world of tattoos,” he said with a crooked grin.

“I don’t know if I’m more worried about Logan wanting to get them or Allie wanting to design them. I’ve never seen her so interested in something,” Savannah leaned against the garage door with a wry smile.

“How many designs did she do on the way home? Four? Five? And they were decent.”

“Don’t tell her that.” She pushed a strand of her hair behind her ear. “Have you visited your dad yet?”

Jake perused her from head to toe, missing nothing. He noticed the fullness of her bottom lip, slightly moist from her tongue. Her sweatshirt hugged her body, making it easy to imagine the curves without the clothing in the way. Her fingers were in the front pockets of her jeans, her elbows resting against the door. Her back was arched, and he could pretend that was to move her body closer to his. His pulse throbbed with the thought, and he stepped toward her, so only a foot separated them.

He was drawn to her like a bee to sweet nectar.

“Well?” she said, and he fought to remember what she’d just asked him.

“My dad. Yeah. I visited him.”

“How’d that go?”

“Wouldn’t really call it a rousing success. It was awkward as hell. He was friendly, acted glad to see me.”

“But you…weren’t.”

Jake shrugged. “I’ve got a lot of years of being pissed at him to get over.”

She nodded and glanced at his lips, which was all Jake needed to make him move closer yet.

“Kiss me and my knee will go up faster than you can apologize.” She smirked when she said it, her hot breath caressing his face and making him yearn even more to kiss her.

He laughed. “Do you get a lot of dates like that?”

“I don’t date.”

She could have easily pushed him away, but she glanced again at his mouth, and in that moment, Jake discerned the truth in her eyes. She
wanted
him to kiss her. Savannah still wanted him, whether she would allow herself to admit it or not.

For a minute, he let himself get lost in the desire in her eyes, in the heat that pounded through his veins. Then he forced himself to take an excruciating step back and make her consider what she was missing, even though not tasting those lips or sliding his hands across her skin nearly killed him.

He stared at her for a minute longer, then pivoted and got on his bike. “I’ll see you soon. Before I fly out next weekend.”

She was flustered. Bothered. Exactly what he’d aimed for. He grinned to himself, put his helmet on and rode off.

S
AVANNAH WATCHED
Jake ride down the dark street, and didn’t move for another five minutes after he was out of sight.

Damn him. He made her body want his, crave him, even though her brain knew much better than to even entertain the idea. She was still shaking from the closeness and that look he’d bestowed on her—one that said he’d like to eat her up inch by aching inch.

The wind was cold now but she stayed where she was, willing it to cool her body and erase the painful tightening deep inside. When her fingers were nearly numb, she finally gave up and went back in, although the empty longing had yet to go away.

M
ONDAY AT WORK
, Savannah spent too much time reflecting on the night before with Jake. She had a stack of papers to read through, but though she didn’t want to think about him, she couldn’t seem to get him out of her mind.

She sat at her desk after Zach went home, feeling guilty that she hadn’t gotten nearly enough done. She’d promised herself she’d check at least two more items off her to-do list before leaving, and she was at last finished. Just one more task to attend to for Allie. The kids were strangely calm and content—Logan with his Game Boy and Allie with her pencils and sketch pad.

Savannah’s obsession with Jake was twofold. There was still the anxiety that lit up like a match to a puddle of gasoline whenever he was with Allie. It was mostly irrational, Savannah realized. She’d figured out he wouldn’t reveal their secret without letting her know first. He
would
force the issue someday—and probably soon—but his style wasn’t to go behind her back. He’d be up front about it. And Savannah would do everything in her power to convince him to hold off.

Then there was the other half of her obsession—the attraction. The memory of how she’d felt close to him on the driveway last night, and in the booth at the pizza shop. Being near him now brought back how being with him years ago had felt, somehow made the memory fresher and a lot more vivid.

Memories aside, her body still reacted to Jake’s, and it ticked her off.

Savannah shook her head and focused on the task at hand. She grabbed a sheaf of card stock and went to the large paper cutter next to the copy machine. Allie had it in her head that she was going to create her own postcards with tattoo-like designs, and she’d asked Savannah to cut some card stock into fourths.

Savannah lined the thin stack of paper along the straight edge of the heavy-duty cutter, trying to ensure the cards would all be the same size. Just as she was about to pull the blade down, the front door opened.

“Hey,” Jake said.

Savannah’s hand slipped and she caught two of her fingers under the blade. “Ouch!” Pain surged through her, and she saw blood welling before she instinctively grabbed the injured fingers with her other hand. “Don’t sneak up on me!” she cried, shaking with fury at her clumsiness.

“I just walked through the door. No sneaking. Came to drop off some papers for Zach.” Looking concerned, Jake led her to Zach’s empty chair, setting a file folder on his desk as he bent over her. “Let me see.”

Vaguely, Savannah thought that if she let go of her injured fingers, they might fall off. She squeezed harder, and tears filled her eyes.

“Allie? Bring some paper towels,” Jake hollered. “Quick.”

Savannah leaned forward in the chair, feeling light-headed. Her eyes were shut, but she opened one and removed her hand enough to find…blood. Lots of blood.

“Jake.” Her voice wobbled. “Can’t stand it…”

“It’s okay, Savannah. We’ll handle it.”

She shook her head, which made everything swim. “Not good with blood.”

He eased her lower, so her chin was between her knees. “No passing out. It’s okay. You’re okay.”

He gently gripped her injured hand, and Savannah felt more pain as he pressed a towel to it, but she didn’t care. She was focused on not falling out of the chair or humiliating herself any more.

“It’s all right, Allie.” Jake’s voice sounded muffled now, but on some level Savannah appreciated that he was making an effort to comfort her daughter. “Is Zach here?” he asked.

“He went home,” Savannah said. “We can call him….”

“Shh. Let me check.”

She started to sit up, but Jake gently pushed her back down.

“No. Let me.” He held her hand tightly and she understood he was surveying the damage. “Oh boy,” he muttered in a low voice.

“What?” She shifted again, but he restrained her.

“The bone in your index finger is visible. You’ll need stitches.”

The spinning increased and she put all her effort into sucking in deep gasps of air and letting them out slowly.

“Get your brother to pack up,” Jake told Allie, and Savannah was aware of her going into the conference room and doing as she was told. “We’re driving you to the E.R.”

“What about Noah?”

“Who’s Noah?”

“Doctor. Brother-in-law to be. Dr. Fletcher’s office.”

“Know the number?”

She didn’t, and told him where to find a phone book.

While he was dialing, Savannah lifted her hand toward her face, which was still buried between her legs, and moved the paper towel aside. She wanted to see her injury….

No, she didn’t.

“Out of luck,” Jake said. “They’ve gone for the day. E.R. it is.”

Allie and Logan were hovering close by now. Savannah could feel their concern. “I’m all right,” she told them, trying to sound brave.

“She just needs stitches, guys,” Jake said.

“Why is she acting like
that?
” Logan, a veteran of many stitches, inquired.

Savannah didn’t hear an answer. Instead, Jake appeared at her side. “Ready to stand?”

She drew in a few more slow breaths and nodded. The key was to not look at her hand. She could do this as long as she didn’t glimpse the red stuff.

“Where are you parked?”

“Out front, down the street.”

After asking for her purse, which Logan fetched, Savannah directed Jake to lock up for her. All this she did without a glance toward her throbbing fingers.

J
AKE THOUGHT NOTHING OF
going after the van down the street and picking up Savannah and the kids where she’d stopped and sat on the sidewalk. Caring for Savannah’s family came naturally. Which would scare the crap out of him if he stopped to analyze it.

Savannah let him do everything. Drive to Layton to the emergency room, answer the questions and fill out the forms at the check-in, dig through her purse for her insurance card, guide her into the little examining room.

The doctor gave her a painkiller and numbed her fingers, and Jake knew the exact minute the drugs kicked in.

“You can go now. I’m fine,” she told him.

He ignored her.

“Mom, it’s my first art class tonight,” Allie said. “Am I going to miss it?”

“Darn it.” Savannah motioned for her purse and pulled out her cell phone. She dialed and waited, but obviously got no answer. “Where
are
those people tonight?”

“Who?” Allie asked.

“Katie. Noah. They’ve disappeared.”

“I’ll take Allie to her class,” Jake said. “Logan can come with me, and then he and I will drive back to get you. Unless you need us here.”

“No. And no.”

Jake noticed both kids looking at their mother strangely, curiously.

“Savannah, it’s a ten-minute drive back to town.”

“We have to pay for class whether I go or not,” Allie stated, and he wondered if she was parroting something Savannah had said earlier.

Savannah dialed another number, ignoring all of them. Allie seemed close to tears and Jake reassured her that she’d get to her art class.

Savannah clicked her phone off and swore.

“What’s wrong, Mom?” Logan asked.

“Lindsey can’t come.”

“Kids,” Jake said, his frustration mounting, “hang out in the hall for a minute, please. I have to talk to your mother.”

Savannah started to object, but he sent her a look that shut her up for once. Logan and Allie went out the door and shut it gently behind them.

“What’s that all about?” Jake asked, his patience gone.

“I don’t want you to have to chauffeur my kids around….”

“She’s mine, too.” He drew closer. “I thought we were over this.”

“Over what?”

“You not trusting me.”

“Of course I don’t trust you. You want to rock her whole world by telling her the truth.”

“It’ll happen soon—make no mistake about it. But I hadn’t planned on springing it on her tonight on the way to art class.”

Savannah cracked one knuckle on her uninjured hand, but didn’t say anything.

“Savannah, this is stupid. You’ve paid for the class. She wants to go and you can’t take her. I’m offering.”

She dialed again.

“Who now?” he asked.

“Michael,” she said into the phone, and explained where she was and that Allie had a class tonight. She hung up within thirty seconds. “He’s on his way.”

Jake shook his head and chuckled humorlessly. Once again, she’d chosen Michael over him. Her ex. She trusted the man she’d divorced more than she trusted him.

He sat back in the horribly uncomfortable chair and stretched his arms behind his head, watching her.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Staying with you.”

A
NY OTHER TIME
, Savannah would have protested, but her energy was sapped and her fight just about gone. “It won’t be pretty,” she warned him—futilely, she knew.

“I’ll hold your hand.” Jake grinned when he said it, and Savannah embarrassingly thought that might not be so bad. She was such a baby when doctors and needles were concerned. “Where’s Michael going to meet the kids?”

“Here. I don’t want them waiting in the lobby by themselves.”

Jake leaned forward and put his elbows on his knees, appearing ill at ease.

“Are you worried about seeing Michael?” she inquired.

He met her eyes, pausing a moment to absorb what she’d said, then laughed. “No. I’m not worried about Michael. Just don’t like hospitals much.”

“Who does?” Especially when they were planning to drag a needle in and out of your skin.

“My mom died here. My sister and I waited by ourselves out in the lobby. Talking about whether to let your kids wait out there brought it back.”

“Jeez, Jake. I’m sorry.” Images of what it must’ve been like for him and his sister ran through her mind and made her shudder.

She climbed down from the examining table to open the door and let the kids back in the room. On her way, she stopped next to him and put her uninjured hand on his shoulder.

“Go get your kids,” was all he said.

They waited in the way-too-small room until Michael arrived. That took forever, but the doctor still hadn’t showed.

Savannah hovered at the door, because she in fact
was
nervous about having Michael and Jake together. If she knew her ex, he’d have an opinion about Jake being with the kids. Specifically Allie.

But she spotted him approaching, and sent the kids to him before he got to the room. They would probably tell him who was with her, but at least there wouldn’t be any awkward Lone Oak High reunion moments to suffer through.

Then she turned around and realized she was trapped in that small space with Jake. She gave serious consideration to running after the kids and begging at least Logan to stay.

Her eyes met Jake’s and she glanced away. A nervous energy hung in the air between them, and she didn’t want to think about what that meant.

“Nice,” Jake said.

Savannah climbed back up on the table. “What?”

“The way you orchestrated that so Michael and I didn’t come into contact. Which one of us are you protecting?”

“Neither. I’m protecting my own sanity. I don’t want you two digging at each other.”

Finally, a short, fifty-something doctor strode in and greeted them. “How are you folks this evening?” he asked.

“I’ll be better once I’m out of here,” Savannah told him. “Not a big fan of needles.”

“You won’t feel anything but a slight tug.”

That didn’t ease her fears much.

She must’ve looked as green as she felt, because Jake stood and walked to her side. “Okay if I hold her other hand, Doc?”

“Of course.”

He gently took Savannah’s hand in his work-roughened one and ran his thumb over her fingers. She was too nervous about getting stitches to appreciate the tenderness of the gesture, though. She faced away from the doctor and his needle, toward Jake. “You’ll never let me live this down, will you?”

“Not a chance, Chicken Little.”

She clenched his hand in response to the “slight tug” on her injured fingers, then clamped her eyes shut and broke into a sweat.

By the time the procedure was over, Jake was even closer and her head was resting against his chest. In coping mode now, she breathed in the scent of him, over and over. Listened to his heart beat. Steadily. Quickly?

The thought disappeared when Jake tightened his grip on her good hand. “Savannah. All done.”

She sprang upright faster than a teenager caught making out in a car. But Jake didn’t release her. She tried to pay attention as the doctor provided care instructions, but caught very little of his advice. The urge to get out of this tiny room before the walls closed in on her was growing….

She shut her eyes again until Jake pulled her off the table to her feet. The doctor was gone.

“You okay?”

She didn’t reply, just headed for the door. Once out in the hallway, she leaned against the wall for a few seconds, willing the dizziness away. Then she finally straightened, starting to feel better.

“You’re really a mess, aren’t you?” Jake noted, falling into step next to her.

“I’m fine.”

“Ma’am! You forgot your papers.” A nurse jogged down the hall toward them. “Just sign them and you can go.”

Savannah stopped at the nurses’ counter, signed, and waited for her copy.

“So fine you forgot to get your discharge papers,” Jake said.

“I told you I hate needles—and blood. But I’m much better now.” She began walking again. “Isn’t this where your father is?”

It was a guess, but his hesitation confirmed she was correct.

They went through the double doors to the lobby and she stopped. “Do you want to visit him before we leave?”

“No.” The response was immediate.

“Don’t you think you should, while we’re here?”

“
Should
should be a dirty word.”

“That wouldn’t prevent you from using it.”

Jake looked down at her, considering. “You want to get home and rest. I can do it another day.”

“All right, Chicken Little.” She started toward the exit.