The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio (20 page)

Dirty, my mind screams. Not X-rated dirty. Not sinful dirty. But filthy dirty. Crumpled newspapers wafting around us. Garbage smells. Creatures rustling unseen but heard.

“Suck it.”

Working that luscious rod around in my mouth, I am transported. The toy is so blue, and smooth, and delicious as it slides between my lips that I forget everything else. In public, we are alone. My hot tongue slips up and down, tickling the tip, learning the curves. Deep throating something this silky smooth seems the most natural thing in the world. I go down, down, down on it. Fucking that toy with my mouth. Showing Chelsea exactly how much I want to please her.

“Get it really wet,” my lover says, and now my mind is overwhelmed by a completely new—and very selfish—thought. How sweet this plaything will feel when it meets my cunt. “Get it wetter than wet,” she whispers. “Wetter than me.”

At her words I realize how aroused Chelsea is already. Putting one hand up to her gently rounded inner thighs, I stroke softly there as I suck on her. Christ, it’s good. My fingers finding her swollen clit up under the harness and tapping on it as I keep up the steady ride with my mouth. My lips play tricks over the tip. My throat contracts. There is motion out at the end of the alley. Peripherally, I make out the blur of sunflower-yellow taxi cabs, the medley of colors as pedestrians crowd along the cracked concrete. But in my little world, there is only one thing: the blue, smooth sex toy between my parted lips.

“Get it all wet,” Chelsea says. “Get it ocean wet.”

I am. I know where it’s going, and I know what to do. I want to feel this alien object probing my inner walls. But first, I want to suck and suck and suck. Why? I don’t know. The hot pulse of sex in that store started me off. Chelsea’s teasing glances as she played with all the different paraphernalia. And the fact that she chose the right toy without hesitation. Understanding that I didn’t want real, I wanted cool.

But it’s warm now. Warm from my wet mouth, as my pussy is warm in my cargo pants. Chelsea will take care of me. I have faith. When she’s good and ready, she’ll whip me around so my palms are splayed on the brick wall of the store, and she’ll lower my slacks and slide aside my lacy lipstick-red thong, and thrust this space-age toy into my pussy.

For now, I do what she wants. Licking, sucking. Slurping on her hard blue rod, as only a back alley baby should.

CHAPTER
9

Deep Throat

Possibly the most famous film of porn’s golden age was the 1972 film
Deep Throat,
in which the adult actress Linda Lovelace made her most famous starring appearance
.
In the film, she played a woman who discovers with the aid of a very randy doctor that her clitoris is located in the back of her throat. Not a terribly complicated (or even possible) idea, but the plot device enabled the filmmaker to showcase Linda’s amazing real-life talent for fellating a penis of any size all the way down into her throat. When the filmmaker originally witnessed her doing it in person, in his office, he was inspired to create the film.

When
Deep Throat
hit the theaters, Lovelace’s performance caused such a stir that millions of Americans watched explicit sex onscreen for the first time. Frank Sinatra, Spiro Agnew, Warren Beatty, Truman Capote, Nora Ephron, and Bob Woodward (who used Deep Throat as the name for his key Watergate source) saw the film on its first run, and eventually more people saw
Deep Throat
in theaters than any other adult film.
Deep Throat
brought hard core into popular culture and played for eight consecutive years at a theater in Hollywood
.
And the technique, or at least a name for it, entered our collective consciousness, changing our sexual cultural landscape.

In terms of pleasure and what constitutes an effective blow job, there are countless differing opinions of this technique. Because of its reputation, and because it seems like virtually every porn starlet can sword-swallow with ease, it is an oft-requested skill, and most folks who give head want to know how to do it. Yet, for as many men out there who want their partners to swallow their penis whole, there are an equal number who say that receiving deep throat pales in comparison to, say, having their balls tugged, or getting a fierce and enthusiastic blow job. People who like to perform the technique enjoy it wholesale, relishing that they can take him all the way down, get turned on by the idea and act, and feel incredibly sexy for having the skill. There are lovers who might only do it because their lover wants them to—a turn-on in its own right. Some consider it merely a novelty; others might think it’s “the bomb.” However you come to it, learning to deep throat can increase your ease and comfort with fellatio in general, and it’s a terrific skill to add to your fellatio bag of tricks.

One of my favorite things to do is when he’s all the way in I “milk” him with my tongue and throat. I hold my head totally still; I can do this and masturbate at the same time, which I always want to do. He makes the most amazing noises!

Deep throating, novelty or not, can feel delicious to the recipient. The tip of your finger is a great place to begin understanding why—next time you’re in the proximity of a chocolate cake, dip one of your fingers in the frosting and suck it off, using the front part of your mouth (lips and tongue). The tip is the most sensitive part of your finger, in the same way his penis is most sensitive at the head and along the underside. This feels really good, but see how your finger feels when you push it all the way in, down to the base (if you can). Your finger is completely surrounded by the warmth and wetness of your mouth. This is the allure and pleasure of deep throating. When you take him all the way in, he is completely engulfed by the pleasurable sensations of your mouth. And for some men, the act itself can be a fantasy-fulfilling turn-on, or an emotionally satisfying act of acceptance.

Learning the logistics of deep throating is half the battle. Familiarizing yourself with anatomy of the mouth and throat will give you an idea of what exactly is going on when his penis goes past the back of your tongue. Underlying your oral anatomy are the nerve responses that trigger pleasurable messages to your brain and also the dreaded gag reflex. Angles and positioning are key for comfort and sustaining the activity—yours and his—for any length of time. Breathing and rhythm are also a big part of the process, both of which work in tandem. Combine these elements with your own preferred tricks and techniques, and you’ll be deep throating in ease, comfort, and pleasure.

The Anatomy of the Mouth and Throat

If you’ve never had any trouble with your mouth, you probably haven’t given it much thought. Blowing kisses, licking ice cream, crunching popcorn, swallowing saliva, talking a mile a minute—these things all happen with nary a conscious thought, like breathing. Our entire oral cavity is a system of constant motion, aqueous and in flux, a self-maintaining motion machine that performs numerous functions and is supported by hundreds of muscles, glands, and even helpful bacteria. Let our tour begin with a kiss.

Illustration 10. Anatomy of the Mouth and Throat

Our lips are the first thing we meet: two soft and very sensitive membranes that line the opening of the mouth, the covering skin being somewhere between true skin and the moist mucous membrane that lines the inside of your mouth. The lips are made of muscle fibers interspersed with elastic tissues that are filled with hundreds of nerve endings, making them amazingly, deliciously sensitive. Beyond the lips are teeth, which should remain covered whenever possible throughout your oral sex session. The receptive and versatile tongue lines the bottom of your mouth, and it’s another excellent tool in your oral sex arsenal and a means by which you can taste and erotically take in your lover’s cock. On the front roof of the mouth is your hard palate, which flows into the back of your mouth to become the soft palate—these palates provide a firm backing for creating suction with your tongue and the seal of your lips. The soft palate is where the mouth ends and the throat begins.

It’s crucial to understand where these two worlds of the mouth and throat meet, because deep throating is an act of swallowing. When you look into your throat, you can see the
uvula
hanging down; the area behind it is known as the
fauces.
The fauces rounds out the curvature in the back of your throat, arcing down and becoming the hidden pharynx, which continues unseen to your vocal cords. The pharynx is the transition between your throat and the openings of both windpipe (trachea) and esophagus. When you deep throat, your partner’s penis (or strap-on) will travel this far.

Separating the windpipe and esophagus is an upright flap of cartilage called the
epiglottis.
This erect, yet flexible, matron guards both openings like a stern gatekeeper, taking cues from nerve responses about which direction to turn and either allow air in or out, or provide a passage for food and liquids to reach their proper destination, the stomach. Swallowing elicits the response of the epiglottis to lying against the windpipe, closing off air to the lungs for a momentary passing of fluids or fuel. To swallow anything, you have to stop breathing for a second, and to swallow a stiff cock you’ll need to keep this in mind and time your breaths accordingly.

If something lingers in your pharynx for a moment too long, or if the object is large and/or hard, your body will intervene on your behalf and attempt to expel whatever is holding up the breathing by triggering your gag reflex. This is an involuntary nerve response, meaning that it happens without your thinking about it, and gagging is your body’s defense against choking. The throat muscles constrict to push out the foreign object, and the constriction occasionally can (sometimes quickly, especially with repeated force from an object) trigger a vomit response. Gagging will make you salivate as well—saliva is like nature’s own lube, so don’t be embarrassed.

The gag reflex can be overcome, or at least worked around. Some people can control it quite easily. Some happy fellators even shrug and say, “What gag reflex?”—while many others contend with it occasionally obeying their wishes and other times not at all. There are a number of techniques you can employ during fellatio to move past the reflex and keep the action going, though it makes all the difference in the world if desire, arousal, and passion are driving your oral sex session. It’s tough not to gag if you don’t want to be going down on him. It’s easier not to gag if you’re really turned on.

Tips for Avoiding Gagging

I heard this from a gay guy: take a deep breath and hold it in. That stops the gag reflex.

You can sense the feeling of gagging as it comes on, and plan ahead with your response. Keeping your hand on his penis is essential; you can stave off deep thrusts that might trigger gagging by using your hand as a spacer. As your throat constricts, try the following suggestions:

• Back off and continue your strokes. Take a few deep breaths, and swallow. Then return to what you were doing.

• Try an alternating pattern with your mouth and hand: take him in your mouth and then back out for a few strokes of your hand, and repeat.

• If possible, move the head of his penis to the front of your mouth and hold still for a moment until the feeling passes.

• Remember to breathe while going down; this helps a lot.

• Give yourself regular breaks from having him in your mouth; this is especially helpful if you gag easily.

• Practice on a dildo or penis-sized vegetable before you go down, and learn to work with your gag reflex.

• Explore any psychological reasons you might be impelled to gag. If the sex act, sex in general, or his genitals are offensive to you, explore why you might be feeling this way. Learn as much as you can about what bothers you, and if you aren’t ready for this, then reconsider performing oral sex until you are ready.

• Don’t go down on him if you’re already feeling ill, or have consumed drugs or alcohol that may make you feel queasy. Some prescription drugs can make you feel nauseated and will make your gag reflex extra sensitive.

• Shift the angle at which his penis is entering your mouth. Many people say that coming down on him from above is easier; try having him lie down or sit, with you facing his feet.

• If you need a break but don’t want to take him out of your mouth, shift the angle of his penis from the back of your throat to your cheek.