The Year of Living Shamelessly (23 page)

Read The Year of Living Shamelessly Online

Authors: Susanna Carr

Tags: #Fiction, #Romance, #Contemporary

BOOK: The Year of Living Shamelessly
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“I do not! I’m wearing these shoes because they are easier to drive in.”
 
“Uh-huh. If you say so.” Hilary brushed the crumbs off her cardigan. “So, how was last night?”
 
“It was great.” Katie felt a blush coming into her cheeks. “At least, I thought it was. But there was no bondage involved, and now Ryder can’t look me in the eye.” She took another look in the rearview mirror. Ryder’s truck seemed to be even farther away.
 
“That doesn’t mean anything bad,” Hilary said. “He might be overcome by the life-changing moment.”
 
“I seriously doubt that.”
 
“Okay, let’s focus on the positive.” Hilary started listing the items, ticking them off on her fingers. “You had sex. You had good sex.”
 
“Amazing, life-changing, but bondage-free sex,” Katie corrected her friend.
 
“Just rub it in, why don’t you?” Hilary said with a smile. “And you had sex with Ryder Scott. Even more important, you fulfilled your New Year’s resolution. The one you’ve made for the past two years!”
 
“No, I didn’t.” Katie hadn’t gone through all this for one night.
 
“One night of sex does not make an affair.”
 
Hilary dismissed the definition with a wave of her hand. “Don’t quibble over the details.”
 
“I don’t quibble. I don’t even know what that means. But I do know that one night of sex means it’s a one-night stand.”
 
“Well, how long is an affair?” Hilary asked. “Two nights?” That still sounded too short and insignificant. “No, that’s a wild weekend.”
 
“What about three nights?”
 
“That’s a fling.”
 
Hilary gave her a suspicious look from the corner of her eye. “You are making this up as you go along, aren’t you?”
 
“Yes,” Katie admitted. “I want an affair, and to me that means something meaningful and . . . and important to both people.”
 
Hilary pursed her lips as she tried to understand Katie’s definition. “So the relationship is consequential if it lasts longer than three nights?”
 
“I guess.” She was thinking more in terms of weeks. Months. And yes, even years.
 
“Then you have a problem because you don’t have that much time left.”
 
Katie sighed. “I know.”
 
Hilary sat up straight. “Unless you make the most of your afternoons.”
 
“You mean
this
afternoon?”Approaching Ryder that soon would be like walking into a minefield.
 
“Sure, why not? He’s had enough time to recover.”
 
Katie wasn’t really thinking about his sexual recovery time. “Ryder doesn’t want to be around me right now.”
 
“Who cares? You wait too long and he’ll come up with a whole list of reasons why he can’t have sex with you. Not to mention the fact that he’ll be halfway to Dubai.”
 
“You’re right.” Katie was reluctant to admit it. “Any idea how I can drag him into my bed this afternoon? And incorporate bondage while I’m at it?”
 
“He’s a man. You don’t need to be too creative when it comes to sex,” Hilary said. “All you have to do is show up, eager and willing, and he’ll think you were gift-wrapped especially for him.”
 
“Gift wrap! That’s it. That’s what I’ll do.” Katie turned to her friend. “Hilary, you really are a genius.”
 
“I’ll take your word for it.”
 
 
 
 
 
Katie stared up at Ryder’s front door. Why didn’t he hide a spare key outside like normal people? And did he really have to live on the second floor of an apartment building?
 
Katie wrapped her long overcoat tighter around her body as the wind started to kick up. She slung her shoulder bag around to her back and tried to accurately gauge the distance of the stairwell to Ryder’s balcony.
 
She could make it. She grimaced and decided to check again. Her chances would have been better if she had been wearing jeans and rock-climbing shoes. Something with more traction than her ballet slippers.
 
She glared at the black flats. She didn’t care what Hilary believed. The level of her self-confidence was
not
measured by the height of her heels. She happened to be very confident in the plan she had hastily put together once she got back to town. She knew she had to bombard Ryder today before he built up any resistance.
 
She just wished the plan wasn’t necessary.
 
Katie grabbed the short safety wall next to the stairs and kept her eyes on the railing of Ryder’s balcony. The wet, slippery railing was still covered with clumps of snow.
 
She wasn’t going to think about that. Katie glanced down. It wasn’t
too
far to the ground. She could do it. She sat on the safety wall, slinging her bare legs over the side. She leaned forward and grabbed on to Ryder’s balcony for dear life.
 
Katie pressed her feet hard against the safety wall, her fingertips turning white as she clung to the balcony. Her coat was flapping in the wind.
 
Okay . . . now what?
 
She really should have thought this through, she thought as she hung there like a suspension bridge. All she knew was that she had to get into Ryder’s apartment while he was out. She had no idea where he had gone or for how long. She just had to be in place when he got back.
 
She took a deep breath, clung to the edge of Ryder’s balcony and pushed off the safety wall with her feet. Swinging her legs, she banged into the wood structure. Katie winced and refused to let go of the balcony. Her body banged against the structure again.
 
Katie wasn’t sure what she had hoped to accomplish, but dangling from Ryder’s balcony was not it.
 
A cold wind tugged at Katie’s long coat. This was probably not the best time to have gone commando.
 
Certain that someone would walk by and look up—because that was just how her luck was going—she grunted and groaned as she hoisted herself up and over the balcony’s wall. Katie’s feet slid over the ledge and hit the balcony floor with a thud. She lay there, gulping for air, her arms shaking from the exertion. She really needed to stay away from the Christmas candy and get back into the gym.
 
“Yoo-hoo!”
 
She heard an older woman’s voice from a distance. Oh, crap. Katie’s pulse started to gallop. Did she have a witness? Was someone calling the cops on her?
 
That wouldn’t be good. While she was dressed for an easy strip search, she wasn’t wearing enough for a night in a holding cell. Katie knew she needed to talk fast to get out of trouble.
 
She sat up and peered over the wall. Ryder’s neighbor waved at her from the balcony on the other side of the stairwell. Katie gave a tentative wave. “Uh, happy holidays, Mrs. Graham.”
 
“Katie Kramer, what are you doing?” the older woman called out. “You could have fallen and broken your neck.”
 
“I . . . uh . . . am here to help Ryder pack.” She slowly stood up and brushed the dirt off her coat.
 
“Sure.” Mrs. Graham dragged the word into several syllables. “That’s what the other girls said. Only they used the front door.”
 
Katie’s stomach gave a twist and she glanced inside Ryder’s apartment through the sliding glass door. “Other girls?”
 
“You know them. Sasha and Tatum come by the most.”
 
“They’ve been here?” Her stomach gave another sickening twist. She should have expected that her competition would be one step ahead of her.
 
Mrs. Graham rested her elbows on her balcony wall. “Not for long. Ryder shooed them away. Don’t worry, the coast is clear.”
 
Katie blushed. “I’m only here to . . .”
 
“Uh-huh.” The woman rolled her eyes. “I know why you’re here. No one climbs a balcony to help pack up some moving boxes.”
 
“Okay, you caught me.” Katie injected an exaggerated sarcastic tone. “I’m planning a sneak attack to seduce Ryder.”
 
Mrs. Graham slapped her palm on the railing. “Good for you.”
 
Katie’s blush sizzled through her cheeks. “I was kidding.” Why was it that exaggerated sarcasm only worked on TV shows?
 
“No, you weren’t. You’ve been after Ryder for ages. It’s about time you’ve done something.”
 
“Oh, my God.” Katie thrust her fingers in her hair. “Mom was right. The whole town knows!”
 
“But aren’t you one to wait until the last minute?” Mrs. Graham suddenly turned to look inside her apartment. “Oh, my phone is ringing.”
 
“Mrs. Graham,” Katie urgently called out to the older woman and clasped her hands together in a form of prayer, “can we just keep this between ourselves?”
 
The older woman gave a snort. “I’ll do my best.”
 
Katie’s shoulders sagged in defeat. That meant Mrs. Graham would tell whoever was on the phone. Katie hoped it was a tele-marketer living in India. “Thanks!”
 
“Good luck!” The woman waved at her and ran for her phone.
 
“I’m going to need it,” Katie muttered to herself and waited until Mrs. Graham disappeared. She turned and faced the sliding door.
 
Wait a second. What if
this
door was locked as well? And why was Ryder locking doors anyway? This was Crystal Bend, for crying out loud. What were the chances of someone jumping onto his balcony and entering his apartment? Well—Katie rolled her eyes—apart from her, of course.
 
Katie closed her eyes and made a quick wish. She grabbed the handle and almost wept with relief as the door slid open. She quickly stepped inside and closed the door behind her.
 
She halted as she saw the changes in Ryder’s apartment. She hadn’t been around for a while, but it looked totally different. The walls were bare and boxes were stacked up everywhere. Packing supplies littered the couch cushions.
 
Katie slowly made her way to the kitchen. It was crammed with boxes. He really was moving. She opened the cabinets and found most of them empty. Panic began to bubble inside her. Katie placed her hand on her stomach to calm it down, but it was useless.
 
She wasn’t sure why she was so surprised. Ryder had said he was moving, and that guy always followed up on his word. But she hadn’t seen any evidence of the impending move until now.
 
Worse, she didn’t think she could stop him from leaving. Hell, she couldn’t keep him in her bed. She wished she was enough of a reason to make him stay.
 
Katie wasn’t sure how long she had been standing in Ryder’s kitchen before she spotted Ryder’s pickup truck entering the parking lot. She ducked, hoping he didn’t see her in the window. For her plan to work she needed the element of surprise.
 
She hurried to his bedroom and swung the door shut behind her. There were boxes in the corner, but his bed was still in one piece. That was a good thing, especially since she was counting on using the headboard.
 
She grabbed her purse and pulled out the bright red Velcro handcuffs she had bought this morning after returning from Seattle. Katie hadn’t had a chance to try them out, but she was sure they would be fine. After all, how dangerous could Velcro be?
 
Katie scurried onto the bed and threaded the handcuffs through a rail in Ryder’s headboard. Once she had the handcuffs perfectly aligned, she reached for her purse and pulled out a shiny red bow. Taking off the sticker to reveal the gummy side, she affixed the bow on the handcuffs.
 
Katie paused to study her handiwork. Perfect. She flinched and looked over her shoulder when she heard the front door. She was really cutting it close. Katie shucked off her ballet shoes and kicked them onto the floor. They landed softly as she removed her winter coat and tossed it after the shoes.
 
She looked down at the white nightie she wore. The spaghetti straps were as fragile as they appeared, and the hem reached her thighs. It was the prettiest piece of lingerie she owned. She liked the romantic embellishments of seed pearls, sequins and lace. But it was only at this moment that she realized it looked a lot like a wedding dress.
 
That was going to be a turnoff for Ryder, but there was nothing she could do about it now. Unless she decided to get rid of it, too. Katie hesitated, her fingers clenching on the spaghetti straps. No, she couldn’t do it. She was already putting herself in a vulnerable position and she needed something, even a flimsy piece of lingerie, as a shield.

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