To Fall (The To Fall Trilogy Book 1) (17 page)

24

Abby

I was pretty sure Xander just confessed he liked me. Blinded by my own feelings, I found it hard to trust my instincts. Had Xander been as jealous of Jake as I had been of Danielle? I found it impossible to imagine Xander jealous.

A fast song piped into the speakers and I stepped away from Xander. He examined the new space between us. “What happened?”

“Nothing,” I lied, fighting the panic in my voice.

Feigning hurt, he said, “You had me for one dance and that’s it? You’re done with me now?”

My eyes locked onto the floor.

Concern colored his tone. “What’s wrong?”

I mumbled, “Xander, I can’t.”

The space between us shrank to almost nothing. “Can’t what?”

“I can’t fast dance.” Okay, maybe a tiny exaggeration. I could move around a little bit, but the kids here didn’t do that; they really got into the music—that was how Xander danced with Danielle. There was no way my heart could handle a little dancing mixed with a whole lot of Xander. There was no way I could be like her.

“Let me be your instructor.” His hands appeared in front of me.

My shoulders slumped. “Xander, you don’t understand.”

“Explain it.” He was strangely patient with me.

“I physically can’t.”

“Two left feet?” he said, smirking.

The fact he found this humorous was frustrating. I blurted out, “You noticed I like to pass out?”

His brows rose. “I did. I thought it was a ploy to get me to notice you. It wasn’t?”

I couldn’t believe I had to explain this to the hottest guy on the planet, who for some reason, wanted to dance with the one girl here who couldn’t. “I have a bad heart. I can’t…I’m not like other girls.” My voice was near inaudible. I broke out the old standby: bite lip and look down.
Don’t look into his eyes
.

Warm fingers tipped my chin up. “Abby, I know. I figured it out. Trust me, we’ll have fun.”

I looked to the sweaty, grinding bodies around us and swallowed. “Xander, I’ve never fast danced before. I will suck at it and embarrass you.”

His head shot back as though I had slapped him. “Inconceivable! People will only notice how exceptionally awesome I am.” When my eyebrow cocked, he broke out into a wide grin.

Xander did the best he could with what he was given. We both laughed at how ridiculous I looked. He didn’t care. He didn’t care I stepped on his feet. He didn’t care I looked like I was having a seizure. He seemed happy to dance with me, and somehow, I felt fine. I wasn’t out of breath and my heart stayed in its same weak pattern.

After twenty minutes of dancing, Xander’s siblings appeared. They spread out like they had an agenda and didn’t greet their brother. That was strange. Caleb aimed toward a group of drunk girls that pawed at him as if he was a Chippendale and he didn’t seem to mind. Hannah and Calista stopped at the huddle of rowdy boys that got rowdier in their presence.

Hours passed filled with fast tempos, slow songs, laughing, and talking. Xander found ways to touch me by holding my hand, skimming an elbow, or brushing his arm along mine. The contact was constant and there was never any awkwardness. Being with him was just…right.

I hated knowing this, but it was getting close to my curfew and I needed to find the girls. “Xander, it’s getting late.”

Sighing, he closed his eyes. “I know. We have to get you home.” It was silly, but my pulse raced when he said, “we.”

We stumbled upon Beth in the living room, talking with a huddle of people, and Greg was among them.

“Hey, guys.” Everyone smiled at my greeting.

Greg said, “Hey, back. You two have been…
dancing
for a while.” His eyes shot above my head and suppressed a laugh. Thanks, Greg.

A very firm chest rumbled with laughter against my back and I was hyperaware that Xander’s hand slid onto my hip. It took all of my self-control not to lean into him, or flip around and… Right. Curfew. That’s why I was here. “Have you guys seen Mel? It’s getting late.” My voice had an odd squeak to it.

Greg’s smile fell. “Knowing Tyler, he’s drunk, playing beer pong.” Narrowing his eyes, Greg’s meaty finger pointed to the back of the house. I suspected Greg wasn’t a fan of Tyler’s.

I was surprised that Greg joined us on our quest for Mel. And it turned out Greg did know Tyler well. The back room was packed. The room smelled like stale beer and there were a few stains on the wood floor to suggest several cups spilled through the night. Mel was in the corner, watching Tyler and Jake play against two other guys I didn’t know.

“Abby Wabby and Bethie Wethie!” Mel squealed and stumbled toward us.

Beth huffed. “Mel, how much have you had to drink?” She eyed Mel’s wrinkled dress and the stain down her front.

Mel’s shoulders met the bottoms of her ears. “I don’t know. But I do know I completely suck at beer pong.” Her words slurred and she reeked of alcohol.

Still playing the game, Tyler wobbled a bit and was louder than necessary. It angered me that he didn’t care enough to watch out for her.

“Mel, we should take you home now.” Reaching for her, she wrenched away from me.

“No way, Ab-bay!” Mel giggled. “I’m having fun!” She swayed and my hand shot out to steady her.

Xander pulled out his phone and texted someone. Who did he keep texting?

Greg bent over to her and his voice was quiet. “Melanie, it’s getting late and you’ve had too much to drink.”

Scanning the room, I spotted Mark becoming well acquainted with a Rattler cheerleader’s tongue. Either Beth hadn’t seen him or she chose to ignore him this time. Tyler eyed us from the game and I realized we had a few more eyes on us. I hoped taking Mel home wasn’t going to cause a problem.

Sure enough, Tyler gave his red cup to Jake and stormed over, throwing an arm around Mel’s shoulders. “What’s up?” The casual statement did not match his body language.

Melanie played with Tyler’s collar, completely unaware he was sizing up the guys. Tyler wasn’t small, but he wouldn’t stand a chance against either Greg or Xander, let alone both. Tyler squinted at me, and in a heartbeat, Xander appeared in front of me, blocking Tyler. Greg followed him a second later.

Beth met Tyler’s glare. “We’re leaving and Mel’s our ride. I want to make sure she gets home okay.”

“I can take her, too,” he snapped. “We weren’t ready to go yet. We aren’t ninety, ya know.”

I peeked around the Xander-Greg wall. “I know, but I have a curfew. You live down the street and it’s out of your way to drive her to the dorms. We were going anyway.”

Tyler’s jaw worked and Xander’s hand landed high on Tyler’s neck—it was a weird placement for his hand to be. “Abby’s right. Stay, enjoy the party.” After a beat, Xander’s hand returned to his side.

Tyler took in Xander’s suggestion. I didn’t think he was leaving the beer pong game anytime soon, and I was sure he didn’t want to have to look after his girlfriend—not that he was anyway.

Tyler shrugged. “Okay. Night, baby.” He kissed Mel with a lot of tongue and even more groping. Once her mouth had a saliva transfusion, Tyler went back to the table.

Greg mumbled something that sounded an awful lot like “dickhead” and Xander nodded.

Hannah and Calista breezed into the room and caught Xander’s eye; he gave the slightest nod to them. If I hadn’t been interested in all things Xander, I would have missed it. He knew they were here and didn’t say hello?

I had Mel take off her heels since her feet weren’t stable. Xander and Greg each put a hand around her waist and guided her out to her car. Greg helped Mel into the passenger seat and grumbled something else that caused Xander to shoot him a sympathetic look.

Beth took my attention off the guys. “I don’t know if Mel’s gonna make it without blowing chunks. Maybe you should get another ride?” Her brows rose and I got her meaning.

I whispered, “Oh, I don’t think he wants to.”

“I’ll take you home, Abby,” the low, sexy voice said behind me.

My mouth dropped and my knees felt hollowed of cartilage. With my back still turned to him, I mouthed,
Thank you!
and Beth winked.

Xander rested a warm hand on my back and followed me down the street. It was a simple touch to guide me, but it felt like his hand branded my skin through my dress. Tingles exploded like fireworks from that small point of contact.

We stopped at a black Toyota 4Runner with tinted windows. The SUV unlocked as he opened the passenger door for me and we both took notice the step was much too high. He held my hand to help me into the seat and I could have sworn his eyes flicked to my legs as he closed the door.

From the side mirror, I spotted a black Honda Civic with the same dark tint parked behind us. Xander slid behind the wheel, taking my attention off everything else.

“Thank you for taking me home. You didn’t have to.”

Tilting his head, his eyes locked onto mine. “No, I didn’t have to. Having to do something is an obligation, a duty, a will that is not your own. Wanting to do something is a choice that requires heart, desire, a will that is yours. Those two concepts are a universe apart. I wanted to, Abby.”

“Oh.” I sat stunned.

With the push of the start button, the air conditioner blew away the stagnant heat in the cab, and country music quietly played. I didn’t peg him for a country fan, but I had never thought about it before. The interior smelled of leather and new car, the only lights illuminating us were from the dashboard and navigation screen.

I glanced back at the house. “Will your sisters be okay in there?”

His lips quirked up to one side. “I’m not worried. Caleb is with them anyway.” Xander pulled out of the development and headed back to my house; I still had no idea where he lived.

“Now I have to add dance instructor to your résumé. I’m not quite sure how you and I danced for hours tonight. That was a first for me.”

An awkward beat passed before he said, “Abby, how come you lied to me about your heart problem that day with Bozo?”

“I don’t know,” I mumbled, playing with the hem of my dress.

“Yes, you do.”

I squirmed in my seat. “Because you’re you, and I’m me.”

With a glance over to me, his brows furrowed. The wheel spun, the vehicle pulled over to the side of the road, and he parked. Oh crap. He swiveled toward me. “What does that mean?”

“You have to ask?”

He nodded and his voice was firm. “Yes. I have to know what you meant.”

I spoke with more hostility than I intended. “Look at you, then look at me. Are you kidding? You could have any girl you want. You never seemed interested in me, so why make myself even less attractive by telling you the truth? I have a scar down the middle of my chest and I can’t do anything other girls my age can do. Yeah, I’m a real appealing package. Why would you go for me? I see you with Danielle and—” I so needed to learn when to hit the shut up button.

“And what?”

My teeth sunk into my lip and I focused on my fingers.

“Abby, I am looking at you. I look at you all the time. You really have no clue? Do you have any idea what it does to me to see you with Jake? To see you sit next to him at lunch every day. To laugh at
his
jokes. To smile at
him
.” He scoffed. “I’m not interested? Abby, I actually don’t live anywhere near your house. If I wanted Danielle, I would be running around her neighborhood, waiting for her to pass out or twist an ankle. If I wanted Danielle, I wouldn’t have gone out to the basketball court just to see if you would talk to me. If I wanted Danielle, I would have danced with her all night. If I wanted her, I would be driving her home right now.”

A hand scrubbed over his face. “Damn it, this is my fault. This isn’t how I wanted to tell you. I should have… If I had just told you, then maybe you wouldn’t have danced with Jake tonight. He wouldn’t have taken advantage of you.” Xander’s voice turned to a growl. “He wouldn’t have put his lips on you. His hands…”

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw his fists clenched in pure white. Tears brimmed; I bit my lip harder, and looked out the passenger window. I was ashamed to have put myself in that position with Jake. I should have known better. I was jealous of Danielle, which was why I accepted a dance with Jake, but I never intended it to go beyond a simple dance.