To Forgive & Hold Safe (The Broken Men Chronicles Book 4) (21 page)

Hannah had been in her seventh week of pregnancy when she’d broken the news to me.

In the following week, things moved along pretty quickly.  Hannah had put up her house for sale and moved in with me, we’d had our first doctor’s appointment, and things couldn’t have been greater between us.

Overcome with bliss, the recollection of Hannah’s vision for our future hit me – the one with the white picket fence. So, I built it as a gesture to prove to her that I would do anything to make her happy.

Mike, Jake, Paxton and Theo joined me in the sweltering heat to make my woman’s vision a reality.  Suffice to say, Hannah was in quite a shock to find five men greeting her with swinging hammers and an abundance of lumber.  The tears were immediate, and it took me a good ten minutes to get her calmed down, after which she then rushed out the front door to hug each guy out of gratitude.

I stood and watched it all with my arms crossed at my chest, my smile frozen in place, and then she finally turned to me, making her approach.

“You okay?” My arms wrapped themselves around her.

She kissed my chin and then pecked my lips.  “I couldn’t be happier.”  Her smile and the brilliance of her eyes confirmed it.

“Good.”

I bent my head to kiss her and she met me half way, pausing to say, “You’re so getting lucky tonight,” before she continued louder so the rest of the men could hear her.  “I need to make a few calls.  Seems a few girlfriends of mine would enjoy scoping out the hot construction men that are hard at work in my front yard.”

With a searing kiss, Hannah made a mad dash for the house.

Within an hour, women began arriving. And yes, they sure did enjoy watching their men at work, if the giggling, the whispering, and the hot looks were anything to go by.  Hell, even some new little blonde shorty I hadn’t met yet, had joined the fray, her gaze intent on Theo.

Hannah’s morning sickness began to wane by her thirteenth week of pregnancy.  The woman seemed to glow, and the slight bulge in her belly caught my attention often.  Knowing, without a doubt, that Hannah was growing round with my child made me crave our physical connection more than ever before.

“Baby!” Hannah called out. “They’ll be here soon and I need your help down here.  You know everything will be fine, so please stop wearing out the carpet with your pacing.”

Mike and Nicole had been sworn to secrecy about our baby news since Hannah and I had decided that it was for the best to wait until we were over the riskier part before making a formal announcement.  Today was the day.  Under the guise of a semi-housewarming barbecue to celebrate Hannah’s moving in, we invited everyone over.

As the crowd settled with their plates and drinks, I got up to my feet and held my hand out so Hannah could join me.

“Thanks for being here,” Hannah began.  “It’s been a wild and fast-paced series of months since I’ve met this handsome and sweet man.”  She looked up at me, her smile beaming.

“We have something to say to all of you.” I stood behind Hannah, putting my arms around her waist and leaving my hands on her belly.  She covered my hands with hers.

“Ready?” she asked so only I could hear her.

I nodded.

“We’re pregnant!”

We didn’t have to wait long for a reaction.  Hell, as soon as the words were out, the commotion was instantaneous.  Two mothers got up, barrelling toward us.  Our fathers seemed a bit too pleased with our news, which helped me relax a bit.

The tension never really left me, because I had to worry about the two additional people who were seated at the back of the crowd.

The moment Hannah and I approached Betty and Don, I knew they didn’t object, what with the teary smiles we received.

With her arms around me, Betty whispered in my ear.  “You deserve this and so much more, Benjamin.  Promise me you’ll call the minute the baby is born.”

“You’ll get a call about the baby shower before then,” Mom told her. Betty let me go to hug my mother.

Don shook my hand.  “This baby might not be our grandchild but-”

“Don, you two will always be family,” I said.

“He’s right,” Hannah said, standing beside me.

Don let go of my hand to take her in his arms.  “Sweetheart, you’re a godsend.”

I couldn’t agree more.

With the folks having left for the night, Hannah and I were surrounded by friends reminiscing about the last few months.

My girlfriend had fallen asleep on my lap, while I held her in front of the fire pit as the gang chatted quietly.  I looked down and studied her face.  There was a slight smile there, and I couldn’t help but be fixated.

“So when’s the wedding?” Jake asked as he fed one of the twins.

Mike chuckled.  “He’d have to pop the question first.”

“You two are worse than women.” Paxton nodded his agreement.  “I’m curious though.  No one’s mentioned how quick this all has been.”

I watched as every couple turned to one another and smiled and then looked back at me.

“Have you seen yourself lately?” Danica asked.  “You haven’t been the same since Nikki’s and Mike’s wedding.  The old Ben is back.”

“Dani’s right, bro,” Mike said.  “After getting to know her, seeing the way she looks at you, she’s what you’ve been missing.”

My lips stretched into a grin.  “I think so too.”

Hannah woke not too long after the proposal conversation ended, at which point the gang decided that it was time to take their leave.

After locking the front door behind the last of our visitors, I grabbed Hannah’s hand and led her toward the staircase.

She pulled back on our interlocked fingers.  “No.”

“But you’re tired, sweetheart.  You should be in bed.”

“I should be in your arms.”

“Well since you put it that way,” I kissed her forehead, “let me make sure we’re locked up tight, I’ll wash the rest of the dishes, and then I’ll come and join you?”

“How about you lock up, we leave the dishes until tomorrow and you come and shower with me?” she countered.  “The smell of barbecued food is making me nauseous.”

“I’d definitely rather wash you than those dishes.” I pecked her lips.  “I love you.”

“We love you too, Daddy,” she said and looked down as she rubbed her belly, and then I saw her stiffen and her hand stopped its movement.  She jumped and gasped, and then her eyes snapped to mine, tears present, but judging by the grin on her face, they were happy ones.

“What is it?”

“Butterfly flutters,” she whispered and then broke out in a giggle.

“The baby kicked?”  She nodded, then grabbed my hand, placing it firmly on where she was feeling it.  “I don’t feel a thing.” Hannah seemed more disappointed about it than me, but I knew it was still too early.

Okay, so I’ve been reading the books too.  Sue me.  I’d done the same when Candace was pregnant with Karen.

“This is amazing,” she said, breathless and consumed with emotion.

You would have thought I was used to a woman sharing this stuff with me after having been through it once already, but no.

Candace had had a miserable pregnancy.  She’d barely wanted me to touch her.  Hell, things like wrapping my arms around her, kissing on my woman’s belly never happened more than once.  When it did, my wife had pulled away.  What woman wouldn’t want to share that with her man, despite how shitty she felt?  What’s more, what husband doesn’t get to feel his child kick?  It was safe to say that Hannah was entirely different.  It was as clear as glass that the woman loved me unconditionally, faults and all, and that she wanted me to be part of every little step in this journey of ours.

“I wish you could feel this.” Her bottom lip quivered.

“Hey!” I grabbed her face, tilting it up toward mine.  “Don’t be sad.  I will soon enough.  That flutter bug in there still has loads of time to dazzle me until she comes out.”

“
She
?”

“Yes.” I smiled sheepishly.  “I think it’ll be a girl, and she’ll be a spitting image of her beautiful mother.”

“I wouldn’t mind a mini-Benjamin running around.”

I groaned.  “We’d be in trouble, then.”  I laughed.  “Now, go warm up the shower and I’ll make sure all is shut down first.”

“Hurry up.”  She kissed my nose before heading up the stairs.

Keeping my eyes on her retreating form, I couldn’t help but wonder how I’d gotten so damn lucky.

“Baby!” Hannah called out.

“Yeah, sweetheart?”

“What do you think of this?” she asked.

Nearly two months had gone by since our house-warming-slash-baby-news get-together with the gang.  Hannah’s pregnancy had been going beautifully and she was growing rounder by the day at her twenty-one weeks.  Truth be told, she’d never looked sexier to me, and I made a point to tell her that every day before, during, and after loving on her.

I walked around the aisle and came face-to-face with my girlfriend who was smiling while running her hands over a beautiful dark oak crib.  I was too busy looking at my woman to be bothered with bedroom layettes, clothing, and nursery items.  I was going to be a father – to a boy!

The ultrasound from this morning had confirmed it.  Seeing as this was Hannah’s first full-term baby, I argued that we should keep the gender as a surprise, but she refused, stating that she didn’t want yellows and greens to dominate the baby’s quarters.  She wanted us to build a room for our little prince or princess that everyone would envy.  I think it’s safe to say that our child was going to be loved, yet spoiled just the same.

“So?” Hannah snapped me out of my daze.  My hands were on her belly as I kissed her forehead.

“So what, baby?”

“You’re still on cloud nine about the fact that I was right and it’s a boy, huh?”  She giggled before kissing my cheek.  “What do you think about this crib?”

“I think-” I felt the slight twitch beneath the palm of one of my hands.  “Was that a kick?”  My eyes shot down to her belly and then back up to her face.

She nodded with a wide grin.

“Oh, God!” I got down to my knees and kissed her belly through her shirt.  Hannah’s hand feathered through the hair at the back of my head as she whispered “Do it again, slugger, do it for Daddy.”

“Daddy?” I heard coming from behind me, Hannah jumping with a gasp.  “You’re pregnant?”

I got up, turned around and saw a tiny woman with a massive belly and a man standing behind her where they’d both had yet to introduce themselves.

“Dee!” Hannah exclaimed. I moved to stand behind Hannah, wrapping my arms around her waist, covering her small bulge with my hands in a gesture of protection.

“Well you haven’t wasted time, have you,” the woman said, but even though her words could have sounded judgemental, this Dee woman wore a beaming smile on her lips.  And where in the hell had I heard that name before?

One look at Hannah, to gauge her reaction, and I found her returning Dee’s smile.  As soon as I released her, she rushed to hug the woman.

“I’m so sorry I haven’t called,” Hannah said and the man that stood behind Dee walked around the two of them and stuck out his hand, smiling.  “Blake.”

I took the man’s hand.  “Ben.”

We ended up spending the next few hours in a nearby coffee shop talking with Dee and Blake.

Deidra or Dee – as she likes to be called by her friends – is Hannah’s best friend.  Because of Lee, the women hadn’t spoken since before the accident.  Hannah had voiced at one point that she wasn’t quite ready to re-enter the world of her past just yet.

Watching the two women interact as if they’d never missed a beat put a smile on my face.  Hannah needed this.  It’s not that she was without friends, but they were from my bunch of people.  She needed people that knew her past and that were willing to stand by her side well into her future, people that weren’t her parents.

“So how’d you two meet?” Dee finally asked as Blake kissed the side of his wife’s temple before leaning in to listen to the story.

By the time Hannah and I told them the entire tale, Deidra was rendered to a complete blubbering mass of tears consoled by her husband whose gaze was soft toward my girlfriend.

“I’m so relieved.” Deidra made a grab for Hannah’s hand.  “I would have come to visit.  I tried to go into the shop once, but I couldn’t do it.  I couldn’t walk through those doors and see how broken you were.  Not with these hormones.  I was terrified of how’d you react if you saw me after I found out from your mom that you had lost the baby.”

“You talked to my parents?” Dee wiped at her cheeks and nodded.  “I love you, you know that Dee?  I should have reached out.  Why-?”

I rubbed Hannah’s back.  “Because you’re still worried about what those who are close to you will think,” I told her.  “Lee’s parents ensured that with the way they treated you, sweetheart.  And let’s face it, it’s not like you told everyone that you and Lee were separated, even though you guys tried to make another go at it.”  I looked at the couple across the table from us and both their faces darkened.

“I’m sorry about you losing the baby, honey,” Deidra whispered, voice shaking with another bout of emotion.

“I’m sorry I ignored you for the last four months.” Hannah squeezed the woman’s hand.

“You’re happy now, right?” her friend asked, and Blake’s as well as his wife’s gazes were fixed on Hannah in assessment.

Hannah looked at me and said with utmost confidence, “Blissfully.”

“Oh, thank God!” I dramatically clutched at my chest, then dropped the hand to Hannah’s belly.  “I thought that we had only shacked up because of this little guy.”  Hannah rolled her eyes at me while the other two laughed.  “I love you,” I threw in and kissed her temple.

“I like this guy,” Deidra pointed her thumb in my direction.

“Thanks.” Hannah dropped her head on my shoulder, releasing a peaceful sigh. “I think I’ll keep him.  I kind of like him too.”

“You’re stuck with me whether you like it or not.” This made Blake chuckle.

When Deidra and Blake left us, Hannah and I headed toward the car to get home.

“I love seeing you like this.” I stopped to open her door for her.  “I have to say that I’ve been seeing a lot more of those smiles lately.”

“It’s because you make me so happy.”

“You’re sure it’s not the foot rubs or the sex?”

“I’m sure both have a great deal to do with it, but I loved you before we ever slept together, baby,” she said.  “Now, hurry up!  You mentioning sex only reminded me of a few little things I’ve been meaning to do to you.”

“Fuck me,” I mumbled under my breath as my body went taut.

Nudging my jaw to shut my mouth, she smirked up at me and said, “That’s the idea,” before taking her seat, and buckling herself in.