Tracing Hearts (30 page)

“I don’t think so, Vaughn. I’m not giving up my ticket out of here. She’s coming with me,” Oren says, then he moves us both toward his car. My heart is pounding a furious rhythm. I feel like I might pass out. “Sanders, get in, and drive us out of here.” His body guard remains still. “Sanders! Are you deaf?”

“No, sir, but I don’t take orders from you anymore,” Sanders says and briefly looks over at Mick.

“That’s right, even your body guard is one of our agents. You’re screwed, Oren,” Mick says triumphantly. “Put the gun down, and let her go.”

After a few moments of apparent contemplation, Oren releases his hold on me, and I run from him toward Sebastian’s open arms. As Oren bends down to relinquish his weapon, I hear Sebastian shout and see him reach for me. Then, it all happens in slow motion. I look back to see Oren, with his gun in hand, fire two rounds in my direction. I duck down as quickly as I can, falling to my knees, and I cover my head with my hands. Then, more shots are fired. I look over to watch as Sebastian falls lifelessly to the ground beside me.

“
No!
” I scream as loudly as I can, and crawl over to him. I hear the sounds of agents rushing in and feet scuffling about on the concrete, but they're of no consequence now. My only concern is the blood pooling from beneath Sebastian as I cradle him in my arms. “No.
No
, you will
not
die on me today. Not now, not ever. Damn it, Sebastian. Stay with me. Don’t leave me again,” I sob, as I hold him close. My tears fall onto his shirt and mix with his blood. His eyes are closed as he struggles for breath. I hold my hand on his head wound, hoping to stop the blood from oozing out. His chest is also bloody, but I’m not sure if he’s been hit there too or not. I feel around on his shirt and discover a hole in the pocket. I peek through it and dread overtakes me. He’s been shot in the chest too.

My wails are ceaseless as the ambulance arrives, and the paramedics pry me away from Sebastian. I watch as they work feverishly on him. Along with an oxygen mask, he’s hooked up to an IV, then loaded into the vehicle. I’m not permitted to ride with him in the ambulance, so Mick agrees to drive me to the hospital. As I sit in the passenger seat, I’m frozen in place as if time stopped the moment he lost consciousness.

“He’s going to be fine, you know. He’s a tough one. Tough guys always prevail. And, he loves you. He won't walk away from that without a fight,” Mick says, trying to console me. I look at him, my face a blank canvas.

“I’m afraid.”

Mick places his hand on top of mine.

“I know. Try and think positively.” He smiles at me, but it’s not a genuine, happy smile. It’s one of pity and concern more than anything.

I stare out the window, watching the trees beside the highway wiz by, but I’m not really seeing anything. My mind is awash with all thoughts of Sebastian and at the same time, it’s blank. I close my eyes and say a silent prayer. I don’t know his exact injuries, but they aren’t good. A head wound and chest wound are enough to kill anyone. I just wish he would’ve opened his eyes before they took him to the hospital. Maybe then, I’d feel better about his condition.

“How do you know?” I ask, sort of out of the blue.

“How do I know what?” Mick asks, puzzled.

“That he loves me,” I clarify.

He snorts. “It’s obvious.” He looks at my confused expression and continues. “After he left you, he called me daily—sometimes multiple times a day, asking me what you were doing, if you were safe, and if I’d heard from you. It was enough to drive me crazy.” He chuckles in remembrance. “Do you know he stayed awake all night, every night, just outside your house, making sure you were safe?” My eyebrows shoot up.

“The peeping tom,” I mutter.

“Yes. That was Seb. I caught him hiding behind a bush the night you saw him. I told him he should go back to you. I said you’d be safer with him than without him, but he was hard to convince. He knew you had twenty-four hour surveillance, and that seemed to pacify him.”

“I did?”

“Yep. Jaci and Steve had your back the whole time.”

My brow furrows. “Who are they?”

”You might know them better as Shelby and Jamie.”

A light goes on in my mind.

“They're FBI agents?” He nods. “So, that’s why I saw Jamie with a holstered gun. I thought that was strange. For a few seconds, I thought he might’ve been the stalker.” Then, I remember something. “I almost forgot! Is Shelby okay? Er…I mean Jaci? The man that abducted me…he did something to her. Is she all right?”

“Yes, she’ll be fine. Oren’s henchman was actually one of ours, who was under deep cover. We’ve had him in place for years, just waiting for Oren to screw up. It figures that on the one night he rapes and murders someone, Oren had him somewhere else. If he’d been there, instead of Sebastian, none of this would be happening.” He shakes his head. “He didn’t hurt Jaci by the way, just gassed her, like he did to you.”

Huh.

“So, that’s why she came over so frequently after he left. Did Sebastian know about all this?”

“Yes, but it wasn’t until he left you that I told him. I was also forced to tell him I was a double agent, pretending to work with Oren. Seb was going after him alone, when I told him you were kidnapped. I knew it was too dangerous for our star witness, but he had a plan. We called up headquarters and had both of us wired. He said he was sure he could get a confession out of that asshole, pardon my French. I was hesitant, but he convinced me and the bureau. I knew the only loose end would be Oren himself. Seb had a gun, as did I, and the other undercover agent had one too. We also had the meeting place surrounded. The only thing that we couldn’t be sure of was Oren’s reactions. If he became suspicious, or nervous, he could’ve pulled that trigger anytime. Seb was most worried about that.”

“And, now my worst fear has been realized. Sebastian’s been shot and could die.” My tears return, and Mick reaches back across to comfort me. I can tell he hasn’t had to do this often, as he’s sort of clumsy at it.

***

I’m stuck in a waiting room while they operate on Sebastian. Apparently, he suffers from a bullet wound to the head and a collapsed lung. The bullet that hit his head, penetrated his skull, but only caused minor damage. The doctors said he was lucky he wasn’t standing millimeters closer to me when the gun discharged. They are, however, concerned about brain swelling. As for his lung, he wasn’t as lucky. The bullet passed through his lung and exited through his back, which is why I saw so much blood. They determined it was a clean exit, but they're watching for any signs of infection. He remains in a coma until his body can heal enough to let him wake.

I’ve been here for hours. Mick comes in once in a while to check on me and to tell me to go home, but I can’t. I want to be here if, no,
when,
he wakes up. I lie across the chairs, which line the walls of the waiting room, and drift off to sleep.

“Julia?” a voice calls, gently coaxing me from slumber. “Julia, you can see him now.” I jolt awake, sitting upright immediately. My eyes take a moment to focus, but standing in front of me is the doctor in charge of his case.

“Doctor Milton, is he okay? Is he awake?” I say in a rush, hoping for the answers I want to hear.

“No, I’m afraid he’s not awake, but you can see him if you’d like.”

“Will he be all right?”

Dr. Milton sighs ruefully. “It’s touch and go. It’ll all depends on how he does overnight, and even then, there are no guarantees. He sustained some serious injuries, life threatening ones. It could still go either way.” I bow my head and nod. “Please keep your visit short. He needs to rest.”

“Okay, I will. Thank you.”

He exits the room, and I follow him to a dimly lit room, a few doors down from the waiting area. The doctor extends his arm, gesturing for me to enter, then continues walking down the hall.

Tentatively, I step inside Sebastian’s room. As I get closer to his bed, I begin to notice all the tubes and wires that are keeping him alive. A machine behind his bed displays some numbers and a line goes up and down as his heart beats. There’s another machine which breathes for him. It is the only noise in the room. I sit in a chair beside him and stare at what has become of my brave boy. His hand, which has an IV in it, lays lifeless at his side. I reach for it, grasping it as though it’s a lifeline. I lay my head on top of it and weep. After several minutes, I place a gentle kiss on it, then I look at his face. His head is bandaged and his still chiseled chest is wrapped up in several layers of gauze.

“You can talk to him, you know,” Mick says from the doorway. “He might be able to hear you. I’m sure he’d feel better knowing you’re here.”

I turn and give him a wistful smile, then look back at Sebastian.

“I know. I just don’t know what to say.”

“Say what you feel. Say whatever comes to your mind. Just hearing your voice may help him heal.”

I nod then reach up and run my fingers through his hair.

“Hey, you,” I say softly. “I’m here. I’m not sure what to say but you need to wake up so we can start living normal lives.” I chuckle at my own awkward words. “It’s over. The FBI got Oren’s confession. After he recovers from the wounds inflicted by them, he’ll be in prison for a long time. That’s thanks to you. You’re being hailed as a hero. But then, you’ve always been my hero.” I smile, and absentmindedly, fidget with part of his blanket. I continue to talk to him about whatever comes to mind, until a nurse tells me he needs to rest. “I’ll be back tomorrow. Sleep well…I love you,” I say, then I wipe a tear from my cheek. I close my eyes and kiss his forehead before making my way from his room. My vision is blurred from the sadness that refuses to stop rolling down my face.

Sebastian

“Where am I?” I mutter as I walk through the sterile, white hallways of this hospital. So far, I haven’t seen anyone else. Am I the only one here? I’ve been walking these halls for hours, though I’m not really sure, since any sense of time has escaped me. As I journey through, I look in every room, hoping to find someone, anyone, who can tell me what’s going on. Each one I scan is empty. “Hey! Is anyone there? Can anyone hear me?” I call out, but I receive silence in return. The only sound in this endless void, is the soft patter of my bare feet striking the tile floor.

Suddenly, I hear the crackle of a PA system, then recognize the sweetest sound I’ve ever heard.

“Hey, you,” she says softly. “I’m here. I’m not sure what to say but you need to wake up so we can start living normal lives.”

“Julia! Where are you?” I say, sprinting down the hall, looking everywhere for her. “I’m here!”

“You’re being hailed as a hero. But then, you’ve always been my hero.” Her voice echoes a bit, and I’m desperate to find her.

“Where are you?” I repeat my earlier words. “
Please.
I don’t see you!”

“I’ll be back tomorrow. Sleep well…I love you,” she says.

“No, don’t go! Stay where you are. I’ll find you. Just please don’t leave!” My heart beats as fast as my feet move, as I search for Julia. “Julia?” I call out, holding my breath and waiting for an answer. “
Julia?
” I’m panting now from the exhaustion of running and the desperation of my hunt. But the silence has returned. Despite my prodding, Julia says nothing more. I lean against the wall for support, then slide down, to sit on the cold, lonely floor. With my knees bent up and my head resting on my arms, I wallow in self-pity, aching to be with the one person I cannot.

Julia

Sebastian makes it through the night, and I return mid-morning with a shoe box.

“What’s in the box?” asks the day shift nurse.

“It’s a box of letters I sent to him as a child. I thought maybe he’d like if I read them to him.”

“I bet he would too.” She smiles, then exits the room.

“I’m back. Did you miss me?” Sebastian says nothing as he lies still in the bed. My face falls for a moment but after taking a deep breath, I recover my optimism. “Okay, then. Let’s begin.” I open the envelope enclosing the very first letter I wrote to him. I shake my head and smile at my penmanship. “‘Dear Sebastian, I don’t exactly know what to write to a boy, so forgive me if this sounds stupid. My name is Julia. I am a sixth grader at Huntington Middle School. That’s in America. But, of course you know that already. See? I’m no good at this. Anyway, how are you? What is Germany like? Does it snow there? It snows here. Well, not all over America, but where I live, it does. I hope you can read this. I’m writing slowly so you can understand it better. I have a dog named Charlie. Do you have any pets? Oh boy, it’s harder than you think, trying to fill up the front side of a piece of paper. My teacher’s name is Mrs. Kearney. She’s nice, though she’s making us do this, so maybe my first thought about her was wrong. Just kidding she really is nice. I’m going to be a big sister soon. My mom’s belly is huge. It looks like she swallowed a basketball, or a watermelon. I had spaghetti for dinner. What kinds of food do you eat in Germany? Do you have chocolate? Chocolate is my favorite thing in the world. Well, aside from my chocolate bunny. He’s not really made of chocolate, by the way. He’s just brown and he looks like an Easter bunny you’d get in your Easter basket. That’s why I named him that. Maybe you don’t celebrate Easter. Or Christmas. You’re missing out if you don’t. Those are great holidays. Well, I don’t have much more to say until you write me back, which I hope is soon, so I’m going to stop now. It was nice writing to you! Your friend, Julia Bessette.’”

I recall the day I wrote this to him. I had no idea what to say, and I remember being apprehensive about what we could possibly have in common. Little did I know how close we’d eventually become. I glance up at him. He looks the same. I guess I was hoping for some reaction, like maybe, by some miracle, he’d wake up as soon as he recognized the letter. My disappointment is saddening. I fold the letter back up, and reach for the next one.

By the time visiting hours are over, I’ve read him three letters. The nurses are gracious enough to let me stay past hours, but I know I can’t expect that every night. I leave him with the promise to return tomorrow and read more.