Trigger (25 page)

Her hands shake as she reaches for them. “Us?”

“Yes, the racetrack mechanics and the U.S. Army
3
^rd
Infantry Division, Mechanical Maintenance Team.”
Whoops and hollers and whistles erupt and go on forever. Someone,
she thinks it is Steven picks her up and sits her on BB’s hood.
There must be about fifty or sixty people around BB.

“BB has been at track since the accident. They gave
him his own garage and the guys used their off hours and military
leave to work on him. Go on start him up, Miss Mason.”

She shakes her head and looks around for Steven.
When her eyes find him he’s wearing a beautiful blurry smile.

“Come on Miss Mason, everyone has waited years for
this.” She sees a man opening BB’s driver’s door.

“Jarrod?”

“Yes ma’am. Come on Judy we’re all waiting.”

She holds out her arms and he lifts her down and now
she feels the familiar excitement. “I’m going to get into BB?”

“Yes Miss Mason. Got the keys?”

She holds the keys above her head and shakes. The
crowd gets loud again.

The smell is different, but she can remember BB’s
manly, new car scent. She goes with the memory. The seat is
different and she spends some time adjusting it and putting on her
seat belt, as Jarrod gets in the seat next to her.

Silence, she closes her eyes and feels BB around
her. “Come on BB, let’s go kick some ass!”

Just like always, he fires up at her touch. She
hears her yell, as she revs his engine. It’s smooth and perfect and
fills the empty space in her heart that even Steven hasn’t been
able to fill. She releases the clutch and he moves forward.

“Easy, Miss Mason, there’s not much room and there’s
a bunch of people around. Don’t run over anyone. Are you still
blind?”

“Mostly,” she yells. “Don’t worry, Jarrod, BB always
takes care of me.” She and BB drive slowly around and through the
crowd, with her arm out the window. It’s touched by everyone she
passes. She thinks she made a full circle and then stops, turning
BB’s off engine and then lays her head on his steering wheel. “Well
done, BB, you’re the best of both of us.”

Her door opens, and Steven reaches in and pulls her
out and into his arms.

“Did you see, Steven? Did you see me drive BB?” Her
heart feels like crying, but she’s too happy to cry, so she’s
jumping up and down and he has to let her go. “Did you see,
Steven?”

“Yes.” His voice is happy. He sits her back on BB’s
hood and everyone comes to shake her hand and tell their stories
about fixing BB and her red dress poster when they were in
Afghanistan. They are good stories. This has got to be the best
time she’s ever had.

Everyone wants to take their picture with her. She
takes off her dark goggles and smiles and kisses each cheek, and
hugs and laughs until she begins to feel the ever-present aches and
tireds begin to peak. She looks around for Steven and he’s there
just like always.

“Come on, I’ll drive. Let’s take BB home and get out
of the way.” He buckles her in and brushes his lips across hers.
“Stan has a keg and barbeque party planned for all the guys. I’m
sure it will be no place for a lady.” As much as she appreciates
what they did for BB and her, she’s exhausted.

Steven takes off slowly and she waves and waves and
waves. There’s no way she’ll ever be able to thank them for what
they’ve done. Ever!

“I was thinking watching you and BB. If you were
serious about marrying me, a cross-country driving trip – beach to
beach – would be an amazing honeymoon.”

You mean it?”

“Sure. What do you think?”

“I love it and I love you and I love BB! What could
be better than my two favorite men all to myself? Wait. What do you
mean, if I was serious? You think I was caught up in the moment and
being impulsive? Steven, sometimes I think you don’t know me at
all. Do you think I asked you to marry me, only because Simon is
dead and you’re my backup?”

Oh my God. She looks at Steven’s face. Yes that is
what he believes.

“I love Simon and he’ll always be in my heart. After
the accident, I really didn’t believe I would live and I accepted
dying without fear or regrets. Simon knew that, I’m sure you two
talked about it.”

Steven shakes his head no.

“Simon was my first hero. He was happy and felt good
about himself taking care of me and I cherished him more each day.
His lively, playful gestures, thoughtfulness and determination that
I should know what fun was, kept me hanging onto the thin thread of
life I had left. I wanted to believe he loved me. I wanted to
believe that I could love him back. You showed me that I could love
and then you rejected me. I wanted and needed to love and be loved
back before I died or I would never be at peace.

“Simon selflessly gave himself to me. Had Simon
lived and I survived, we would have never married, but we would
have become loving friends for the rest of our lives. I wanted him
in my life and he wanted me in his. I needed him and he needed me
and we both needed you, Steven.”

Her head is starting to throb, but she’s got to say
what’s been stabbing her in the heart and it’ll never heal until
she lets it go.

“Those words you said to me that day about my
bringing light back into your life. I believed them, Steven. I
believed them with all my heart and then you were gone and my light
and belief that I could love and be loved back went with it.

“You were Simon’s best friend and he was yours. He
loved you, Steven and he knew you loved me. He told you he loved me
and you walked away and didn’t even fight him for me. You failed
his test. So he saved me.”

She wipes the tears off Steven’s cheek. “BB, have
you ever known anyone more stupid than Simon and Steven?” BB
purrs.

“Simon made my belly ache once. He was exhausted and
laid his head on my stomach and I played with his hair. It felt
good to touch him and out of no where I trembled. I asked him what
just happened and he said he . . . turned me on. We laughed and
were happy with the moment because it was the first time I felt
alive again and then it was over.”

Judy smiles at the memory and kisses Steven on the
cheek. “Simon was gorgeous and fire that flashed and took my breath
away when I looked at him. But the first time I ever felt desire
and abandon love for a man, was that day with you. I clearly
remember begging you to make love to me. You pushed me out the door
and sent me off to work.

“Years have gone by since that day, but Steven, you
are the only man I’ve ever kissed, Steven. You are the only man
I’ve ever wanted and will ever want. Are you ever going to make
love to me Steven? My plan is to get you to marry me and then
you’ll legally have to make love to me.”

Steven is clenching the BB’s steering wheel. She
didn’t realize they’ve stopped, looks around and surprised they’re
in the parking garage of her building.

“Oh my God, where are the children? Steven, did we
forget the children?”

Steven clears his throat but his voice is still
throaty, deep and low. “Michael and Suzanne wanted to stay at my
place tonight. You know, Xbox, surround sound, DVD, DVR and a big
screen TV.”

“Are you going home to take care of them?”

“No.”

Now that she’s home and
the quiet surrounds her, she’s emotionally and physically exhausted
but so fired up she’s queasy. Steven is helps her get in bed and
she’s lying back against his chest with her eyes closed and sipping
his wonderful, sweet citrus concoction and hoping her raging
headache would stop for just a little while.

“It was just too much for you. I knew it, but today
is when they could all get here. I shouldn’t have given in.”

“No, it was wonderful that I could mostly see them
and BB. The timing was perfect BB is well and has come back to me,
old friends and new friends feel good about what they did, and I
feel privileged beyond measure that they thought enough of me, to
make that effort. A headache is a small price to pay. Almost
nothing else in my life could make me happier than I am now.”

Steven’s fingers lightly stroke her arm, intending
to sooth and relax her, but she’s not relaxed, not even a little
bit. She trembles with his touch.

“Are you cold?” Steven whispers in her ear and goose
bumps pop up on her arms. Shaking her head no, she feels the
wetness on the back of her head that’s lying against his chest. A
well tuned body like Steven’s burns hot.

“What did you mean when you said; almost nothing
else in your life could make you feel happier?” His nose and cheek
caresses hers.

“You, Steven, only having you could make me
happier.”

Steven lays her back and into a cradle of his arms.
They’re face-to-face his lips tease her, almost touching but not
touching. Her lips reach for his and he pulls back. “Oh, you have
me, Judy, so how do you want me to make you happier?”

He wants an engraved invitation? For a second she
feels like punching him in the face, but his face is the face she
loves. “Touch me Steven.”

His lips hover. “Where?” He grins; his warm breathe
on her face.

She’s never lacked courage, and doesn’t even think
about it as she takes his hand and puts it on her breast. She feels
instant heat from his hand through her tank top that is so worn
it’s isn’t even there.

“Here.” She let’s go but he doesn’t move his hand.
It just lays there all hot and totally covering her breast. She
feels his palm and his fingers like fire.

“And?” He’s maddening. She grunts.

“Squeeze me . . . feel me. Do I feel good?” She’s
panting now from frustration rising to near anger and
embarrassment. She feels her cheeks heat to deep red.

He squeezes, her belly jumps and her thighs press
together. He gently plays with her nipple that must have doubled in
length. “Do you feel good? I don’t know you feel Judy. I hope you
feel good with my hand fondling your beautiful breast.” His lips
and nose are so close to touching hers that every word he slowly
speaks sends puffs of warm, heady fragrant breath on her face. He’s
now hovering over her eyes, forehead, cheeks and her lips swell in
need for his.

“Now if you had asked, how do I feel, I would be
able to answer you properly.” His hand moves to her other breast
and he begins to fondle and tease her until she stops panting
because she can’t breathe at all.

His nose barely strokes hers, while his large hand
caresses each breast and he rolls each nipple between his
forefinger and thumb. She gasps and croaks, “How do you feel
Steven?”

“Hummm. Good.” He laughs and it’s filled with fun
and playful teasing.

“Steven, please kiss me.”

“Kiss you? Where Judy?”

He’s so calm it’s maddening. “Lips.” Judy moves
toward Steven and he pulls back.

“How?”

“How? Like a kiss!” Her eyes bore into his and she’s
sure he can see her frustration bordering on anger.

“Oh Judy, there are all kinds of kisses, which kind
do you want?”

“The one that has your lips on mine!”

He chuckles and pecks quickly. “Like how?”

She groans.

Then he brushes his lips from corner to corner.
“Maybe you want this kiss. It’s nice.”

She sighs and and groans louder hoping it sends the
message that, yes, but more please. His hand is now playing with
her breasts harder, faster across each breast, stroking her nipples
with his fingernails. The thin material magnifies his touch and
it’s almost the only thing she can think about.

“No?” He presses his lips against hers with his
mouth slightly open. He briefly sucks on her upper lip and then her
lower lip and then pulls both gently with his teeth. “This is a
mighty nice kiss.”

His hand is under her tank top. Skin-to-skin she’s
panting and watching his bright, laughing blue eyes teases her.
Spreading out his large hand on the back of her head, Steven brings
her lips up to his that open on impact and makes hers do the
same.

Moving his lips against hers, harder and then harder
and then she feels his tongue search for hers. His moan vibrates in
her mouth when he finds it, caressing side to side and pressing his
lips harder until her mouth opens wider. He’s consuming her mouth.
Her tongue eager to feel his moves toward his and they dance
together in rhythm to their breaths and making her moans crash into
his.

Strong and agile, she barely feels his movement as
he changes position, laying her down and resting his body on top of
hers. She feels his weight as he presses his mouth down onto and
into hers. His heat, the weight and length of his body sends
quivers from her toes to her mouth and her back arches upward into
him. “Steven.” She hears her whispered plea.

He continues his sensual attack on her mouth, as his
now bare chest presses against her naked breasts. Steven’s hands
grip her hair, moving her head against his mouth as he wants. And
now his hardness is on her. She’s never been touched there before
and a twinge of anxiety flirts in her mind and then his legs spread
hers and his hard man is pressing against her there!

Never before has she felt anything there, but it’s
like turning the key to BB, Steven pushes against her and she fires
up. Her hands grip his pant-clad butt pushing him harder against
her wanting more. Graceful, sure and relentless, Steven is
everywhere and doing wonderful, feel-good things to her.”More
Steven.”

His mouth is devouring her. His hands are in her
hair forcing her lips tight against his. His chest presses down on
her breasts, and his hardness rubbing, pressing, moving his hips
against her. She explodes from her center where he’s the hardest
and it radiates outward until she feels only Steven and waves of
pleasure. “Steven! Oh my God! More!

She’s rocking against him to get more and he gives
her all she wants. He’s wrapped his arms around her, holding tight
and kissing her the hardest, then softer and softer as the wave
crests and wanes and he doesn’t stop until she’s completely
calm.