Walking in the Shadows (24 page)

“You realize,” T
ad began
as he pulled
into my parking
spot at
my apartment, “t
hat I’
m not going to let you stay alone tonight.”

“What if someone sees your car is st
ill here in the morning?” I asked, but I didn’t want to fight it
.
I needed him.

“W
e’ve
gone over this before,” h
e reassured me,
his
eyes locked on mine
.
“My friend
will vouch for me.”

“You mean lie for you?”

“He knows about us,
Vera
. It came out in conversation when he
asked why we broke up and why I’d been so moody or whatever
,
”
Tad explained
,
his hand warm on my back.

“R
eally? I made you moody?” I asked
,
opening my apartment door.

“Depressed is more like it.”

“
Join the club,
” I replied
,
sliding his jacket off and handing it back to him. He stared down at it
with
his lips in a stern line.

“I wish I was a
more
admirable boyfriend to you.
I would much rather be that tha
n your teacher.”

“I
enjoy your teaching…
b
ut I do enjoy you being my b
oyfriend more. It just can’t be,
”
I replied
,
and h
is response was silence so I continued, “I
should go change. You want your
pajama
s
?”

“Wai
t—
did you get to slow dance at all?”
Tad asked
,
and
I shook my
head. H
e fiddled with his phone before putting it down on the c
offee table and holding his hand
out
.
“May I have this dance?”

“No, we shouldn’t. You
should go home…it’s too hard to have you here and then tomorrow
I’ll be in your classroom again
as your student. It’s so easy f
or you to go from here to there,
”
I whispered
,
my voice trailing off.

“
Y
ou have got to
know...”
Tad cried out,
throwing his hands up
.
“Y
ou
have to know this
is not
easy on me either. I see you almost every day as my student
,
and I have to fight myself...who I really am
—
yo
u know it. You’
re so sensible about
t
his whole thing, eve
rything, you’
re just so
strong. I wish I could be l
ike you and forget all the pain.
”

“
It’s
a farce Tad, I’
m not strong. I feel like there's a train heading straight
towards me. Y
ou were what kept me stable
—
let me forgot the past I’
m running from. I can stand this every day class thing because you take the pain away...even if
you’re
only my teacher,”
I explained
,
shaking my head as I took in his distress.

“
You
know
what the real farce is
?”
h
e whispered
a
s he pulled me into his arms
.
“
T
hat I’
m only your teacher.”

I let him kiss me;
let the nights events wash away from my
mind and
let the shadows remain shadows. Tonight I would forget what I was running from even though it was closer
than
it had ever been
, for I knew I was safe in his a
rms.

I was nodding off to sleep wrapped in Tad’s arms w
hen my cell phone began to ring.
I ignored it at first
,
but then it continued.
I grabbed it groggily
.

“Hello?”

“
Vera
, yo
u
’
r
e
okay?”
Jaz
asked
.

Tad raised an eyebrow in suspicion at me.

“
Jaz
,” I mouthed
and he nodded his head
.
“I’m fine…did you see anything?”

“No, no one did
ex
cept t
he poor girl who found the body,
”
Jaz
’s voice broke
.
“We don’t ev
en know who the dead girl
is.”

“I found her
Jaz
…p
lease don’t tell anyone,
” I
choked
,
trying to keep the images at bay.
I finally felt I could trust her. I didn’t want to keep secrets from everyone any more.

“W…who was it?”

“I don’t know.
I know she goes to our school
,
but I have no clue who she is.”

“So K
nightley came to your rescue then? That’s the only detail
tha
t squeezed out—
that Knightley came to the girl, well you, when the body was found.
..w
as it awful?”
s
he asked
,
and her voice was laced with genuine worry.

“It was tough.
It’s
hard to get a grasp on
what happened tonight
,
”
I said thinking, again, it happened again.
             

“It must have been nice to have Knightley save you…tell me how his arms felt when he wrapped them around you to keep you from looking at the body?”
Jaz cooed
,
her voice suddenly velvet at the thought of him.

“Yes, it was nice to have Knightley there to save
me and
hi
s arms feel very strong,
” I replied
with a smir
k as I kissed his forearm lightly.

“I can only dream about it,” Jaz sighed
.
“I’m glad you
'
r
e
okay Vera, and I won’t tell anyone it was you.”

“Thanks
Jaz
.
”

I turned the phone on vibrate and tossed it on the table before snuggling back into Tad’s chest.

“
Do they feel good around you?” h
e
whispered, his breath causing my skin to prickle
.

“Always
.”

He kissed
my bare neck
.
“Good because I’
m never letting go.
”

“Who
here
believes Grendel is evil and deserves his
fate?” Tad questioned
the
silent
class
.
“
Raise your hands. Okay, now who here believes that Grendel is misunderstood and only does as he
has
been taught?” I was
the only one to raise my hand, so Tad continued,
“
Vera
, why is that?”

“I read both
Beowulf
an
d Grende
l. So I see both sides,” I replied.

“How many of
you have read Grendel?” Tad asked
,
and no one raised their hands.

“Why did you read Grendel?”
Jaz
probed
as she
turned to face me.

Tad’s face grew red.

“A friend suggested that if I were to read
Beowulf
I should read the contemporary Grendel
,
so I could see both points of view and develo
p my own thoughts on it,
” I answered
,
watch
ing as
Tad’s face
relaxed.

“Smart friend,” Tad remarked.

“Very,” I seconded
,
and
Jaz
turned back around.

The intercom beeped
,
but I still had my eyes l
ocked on Tad
.
“Abigail Martin
,
please report to the principal’s office immediately.”

I jumped
at the sound of my name and sent
the coffee that h
ad been sitting on my desk half-
consumed skittering to the floor.

“Class dismi
ssed,
” Tad ordered
as he watched me begin to tremble.

“But we still hav
e like five minutes?” Brad reminded him.

“I said class dismissed,
”
Tad now shouted.

The students shrugged and got up
,
walking around the
spil
t coffee
.

“Nice mess
,
Vera
,
” Lily
sniped, her lips turned in an evil smile
.

“Sorry Mr. Knightley,
”
I said
,
staring uselessly at my mess
.
My whole body was frozen in fear.

“I’ll help you. I said class dismissed, what don’t you get ab
out that
,
Brad
?” Tad snapped at the student staring at me.

Tad
fumbled under his desk for paper towels before going to shut the door behind Brad. I shook my head at him to keep it open; there was no reason to raise more suspicion. He
shook his head, looking at the ground before
letting go of the handle so that the door swung back open.

“What the hell was that?”
Tad asked
, his tone hushed, but still hardened

“I sai
d sorry
.
”

“Don’t worry about this mess, you seem really upset. It’s just your name
...n
o one knows
it’s
you
.
” Tad
picked up the empty foam cup and
swiped
the
coffee spill up
as I stood.

“That’s
it—it’s my name. You think the cops are stupid enough to announce my real name when I told them I was in witness protection?”

“
To be honest with you,” Tad began
as he dumped the soaked paper towels in the trash, “yes.”

“If it is them, tha
n everyone knows that s
omeone here is Abigail Martin
. If the murderer is here, the
n they also know I’
m here
…
”
m
y voice drifted
off as the words I had spoken sank into both of us.

“Shit.”

“I’m scared Tad, it’s like all my
fears ar
e coming true…soon I’ll be dead,
” I whispered as my eyes blurred. The panic was slowly creeping into the edges of my brain. There was no logic to this.

“Those—I’
m going to give the
m a piece of my mind,
” Tad hissed
,
his hands tangled in
the hair on the back of his head
and his forehead
wrinkled
in obvious anxiety.

“If it was them…”

“
You should g
o home, you’
re really shaken,
”
Tad demanded more than suggested as his face
contorted in anger and fear.