Walking in the Shadows (25 page)

“I
don’t really feel safe there?”

Tad fiddled with his key chain and handed me the key.

“What’s this for?” I
asked.

“Go to my apartment.
I have an alarm system
there. Will you feel safer then
?”

“Are you serious? You’re probably already going to get
in trouble for letting the class leave
early and
then letting me leave all together?”
I shook my head.

“Don’t worry about it. I’l
l say you dropped your coffee because you were light
headed
,
and
I sent you home because yo
u seemed ill. Simple,
” Tad explained with a tense shrug.
I knew that nothing was ever that simple, but I was too weak to fight it.

“Thanks Tad.
”

“Get going,
”
h
e ordered
,
nodding over his shoulder.

I looked over my shoulder as I headed in the opposite direction of the principal’s office
,
which was exactly where Tad was headed, his sh
oulders tight and hands in his b
ack pockets.
He had to know, as much as I did, that there was no where that was safe for me anymore.

“
Abbi
…
Abbi
…”m
y mother was saying
,
bu
t I couldn’t see her
. I was in the woods
,
somewhere damp and dreary with moss clinging to the trees towering above me. I walked towards her voice
,
my heart beating harder and harder with each step.

“
Abbi
…
Abbi
,
my bunny…come join us…” m
y father’s voice
echoed
off the trees
as
sweet and strong as I remembered it. I could fe
el tears in my eyes
,
but I didn’
t car
e as I rushed forward
towards the sound of his voice
as he said
,
“My bunny…come join us…”

In an instant
I was falling forward into the darkness and when I looked up I was in a flat clearing
.
The
trees
were
gone and the sun
was
shining
.

“My bunny…” my d
ad whispered
,
holdi
ng out his
hand.
His hand, oh, God.

I fell backwards
,
crawling away as my eyes took in the horrendous sight before me. They were standing
there; my
father’s arm behind my mother
’s
back so pale that I could almost see all their veins pulsing with blood. My body trembled as crimson liquid
began to dri
p from their mouths
,
shimmering a hard red against the ashen skin and pink veins.
My father’s eyes narrowed.

“
Bunny
,
don’t you want to join us
?” h
is voice became
demonic,
deep and demanding
.
“Don’t you
miss us?”
H
e ran forw
ard
,
a blur of pastel
light
,
and in the background I saw my m
other
. Her
smi
le
was
the devil
as
her fangs visible to me,
dripping with crimson liquid.

“Daddy! No
!”
I screamed,
but a
ll
I could see was the
flashing teeth coming to suck the life out of me.

“
Vera
! Vera
!” S
omeone shook
me awake.

I sat
up trembling and soaked with sweat
in Tad’s arms. My breath came out in whooshes
,
and I pulled myself closer to him.

“You scared the crap out me. I could hear you screa
ming from outside
,
and I thought
…
” I looked up to see him clo
sing his eyes to gain composure before he spoke again
.  “Your parents
—
?”

I nodded my
head
,
and
he moved to
lie
do
wn next to me as he pulled
me
into his arms and kissed
my head.

“It must have been some nightmare
.
”

I swallowed
,
shivering
,
cold from the sweat.
Tad pulled the blanket over us
.

“Have you ever had that nightmare before?”
h
e asked.

I realized I was still crying and sat up
,
pulling my knees to my chest. Tad placed hi
s hand on my back.

“No. I don’t
think I’
ve
ever been so scared in my life,
”
I replied.

“What was it about?”

I looked over my shoulder at
him
,
and
his face was
painted with worry
.
“
I could hear my
parents’
voices
,
and I ran towards them and
they were
vampires
…then my d
ad killed me.”

His
eyes
widened as I said the words
and tears began to fall
again.

“I just wanted to feel his arms around me again
—
once I heard his voice I was done for. I wanted it so bad and then the
y were still dead. Always dead, I just never realized how much I wa
nted to hear their voices again,
”
I explained
,
every part of me yearning for that sound again.

When I had calmed down and was no longe
r crying and
shaking Tad
spoke
.
“
I don’t know what to s
ay other
than I
wish I cou
ld talk to my mother again
too
. It’
s not possible though and then I want the next best thing…
you.”

“Sometimes
that’
s just as hard,
”
I sighed.

“Only because we’ve decided to make it that way,
”
h
e replied with a half smile.
                                                                                                                                          
                          

“Onl
y because it has to be that way,
”
I assured him
,
my eyes bearing into his blue ones.

Tad
stood t
hrowing his hands up in the air
.
“To hell wit
h what it has to be. It doesn’t
have to be anyt
hing we don’t want it to be.
”

“You’re
my teacher Tad.”

“I consider you my equal. I feel I can learn
more from you
tha
n I can teach you. I don’
t want to teach you in a classroom, you already know what you need to kn
ow in British Literature
by choice.”

“So you want me to drop your class?”
  I couldn’t disguise the confusion in my voice.

“No, I want you to forget I’
m your teacher,
”
h
e replied as he turned to face me again.

“Tad, come on
,
I see you every day in class
,
”
I teased
,
signaling to his teacher apparel.

“You need me
Vera
, just like I need you and it has nothing do to wit
h what happens in the classroom,
”
h
e remarked
,
stepping towards me.

I took a deep breat
h
,
staring at my hands.
I wanted it so badly to be true, but it wasn’t, just like I would never hear my parents’ voices again.

“You aren’t being logical
,
Tad. I don’t
wa
n
t you to lose your job over me.
I re
ally shouldn’t even be here now,
”
I
stated
as I
looked over at his alarm clock
.
“I should get going
;
Kirsten
is going to worry.”

“
Vera
,” Tad
’s
voice was pained
as he grabbed my arm
.
“Don’t go?”

“There’s only a f
ew more months until graduation. Your kiss from the winter formal will last me until then.
”

“What if I don’t
want to wait? All I can think about is that night, those kisses and caress
es and I want them more
.
”
H
is eyes moved
over my face and to my lips with longing—one that I felt as well. I desperately wanted to feel his lips against mine.

“Goodbye
,
Mr. Knightley,” I replied
,
and
I
had to hold back the tears as I watched his jaw clench
.

I found myself empty to my core.

“This next assignment is an easy A, guys. So
,
I expect y
ou all to participate,
” Tad explained
,
and
his eyes darkened as they landed on me.
It looked as if he was drowning and my body went numb as he continued
.
“We’
ve studied the great poet
Shakespeare and
some of you struggled with his work.  We also just finished
the epic poem
Beowulf
. It’s time for you to find the great poet inside of you
.
”
H
e
pulled at his tie
as he saw
my eyes narrow
. Stupid journal! “This is going to be an anonymous assignment, so as long as you hand me a piece of paper on Friday you
will
get an A. Write
a poem
about whatever you feel. Let it be
anything…leave no stone unturned. Hate, guilt, passion, lust, love, fear, gratitude. Whatever you feel write it. It can be graphic, subtle, calm or angry. Lay
it all out class. On Friday I’
ll shuffle the papers and hand them out to each of
you and
we’
ll all read one out
loud
.
And I
,
of course
,
will participate as well. You can all have fun trying to guess who wrote what, but what will be more surprising, I believe, is that you won’t be able to.”

At the end of the class
I wanted to do nothing more tha
n
to
throw the journal he had given me at his face.

“This is going to be fun,”
Jaz
remarked
when the bell rang
.
“I’
m excited to see what Brad writes.”

“Do you think you’
ll b
e able to tell it’s him?” I asked
,
shoving my notebook in my bag so hard I could hear stitches rip.

Jaz
raised an eyebrow at me
,
but then shook her
head and smiled
.
“Of course!”
S
he stood in unison with me and linked her arm in mine
.
“Let’s see what crazy Jennings does today.”