What to Expect the First Year

BOOK: What to Expect the First Year
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What to Expect
®
the First Year
3rd Edition

By Heidi Murkoff
and Sharon Mazel

Foreword by Mark D. Widome, M.D., M.P.H., Professor of Pediatrics, Penn State Hershey Children's Hospital, Hershey, Pennsylvania

Workman Publishing • New York

Dedication

To Erik, my everything

To Emma, Wyatt, and Russell, my greatest expectations

To Lennox, beautiful baby of the beautiful baby who started it all (my sweet full circle!)

To Arlene, with so much love always and forever

To my What to Expect family—moms, dads, and babies everywhere

Acknowledgments
Even More Thanks (and Hugs)

So, you'd think that by now—after all these years of writing and rewriting What to Expect books—I'd be able to do it by myself, in my sleep, and (hey, why not?) with two hands tied behind my back. Well, the sleep part—I've probably done at least once or twice on deadlines, but I've always needed two hands (it's a typing thing) and I've always needed lots of help. I couldn't do what I do by myself—and I wouldn't want to try.

I owe so much to so many, but let's start with thanks to:

Erik, not only the man who planted the seed for What to Expect (literally, since he's the father of Emma, the baby who started it all), but the man who's helped me grow, nurture, nourish, and protect it—really, co-parent it. You know how they say that the more things change, the more they stay the same? Plenty has changed about my life and my life's work since the day I delivered Emma and a proposal for
What to Expect When You're Expecting
within just hours of each other, but there is one thing that, lucky me, stays the same (only consistently better): the man I work with, live with, and love with. And the babies we made together, Emma and Wyatt, who long ago passed me in height and shoe size—and, I like to joke, in age—but who will always be my bundles of joy (and adding to the joy, son-in-law Russell). And of course, to Lennox, for making me a grandmother, and the happiest imaginable one at that—but also for his contributions to
First Year
(chief among them, being in his first year while I was writing it). And for being the cutest cover baby ever, and that's not just the grandma talking.

Always, Arlene Eisenberg, my first partner in What to Expect and always my most valued. Your legacy of caring and compassion continues to shape, inform, inspire, and, of course, live on through the next generation of What to Expect and beyond. You will always
be loved and never be forgotten. All my family, especially Sandee Hathaway, Howard Eisenberg, Abby and Norman Murkoff, and Victor Shargai.

Sharon Mazel, for taking up the What to Expect mission without hesitation, joining me on the third edition of
What to Expect When You're Expecting
… and, thankfully, never leaving me, even as the hours (and the indexes) got longer. Great minds may think alike, but few have probably thought alike as much as we have—and that always makes me smile, and always makes me grateful. Thanks to you, and to Jay, Daniella, Arianne, Kira, and Sophia, for sharing the amazing woman who is your wife and mom.

Suzanne Rafer, friend and editor, one of the very few who've been with me since conception—at least of What to Expect. I don't know if that makes you a glutton for punishment, but I do know it makes you an exceptionally important person in my life. I've lost count of editions and passes, but not of the contributions you've made to our babies.

Peter Workman—a publishing giant who outgrew many office spaces since the day I first met him, but never outgrew his small publishing roots and values. And everyone else at Workman who has helped so much along the way: Suzie Bolotin, Lisa Hollander, Beth Levy, Barbara Peragine, Jenny Mandel, and Emily Krasner, and all the many in sales and marketing busy selling what I'm writing.

Matt Beard, our favorite photographer (and one of our favorite people ever), for perfectly capturing that Lennox essence for our cover. Lynn Parmentier, for her quilting genius and Karen Kuchar, for babies so beautiful you could practically scratch and sniff their sweetness.

Dr. Mark Widome, professor, pediatrician, and fellow grandparent—not only for knowing it all, but for being able to dispense that knowledge with equal doses of common sense, care, compassion, wisdom, and good humor. I'm more grateful than I can say for vetting our latest baby—my only beef being that you practice too far away to be Lennox's pediatrician. Happily, that role is filled by LA's finest, Dr. Lauren Crosby, who has helped Lennox (and his parents) through feeding struggles, sepsis, slow growth, reflux, and more with endless energy and empathy.

The AAP and pediatricians, pediatric nurses, nurse practictioners, and physician assistants everywhere, for caring so much about the health and well-being of our little ones. The passionate doctors, scientists, and public health advocates at the CDC—for absolutely everything you do, and do with such passion and tireless dedication. The greater good is so much better off because of you. And 1,000 Days—for our shared vision (together, we'll make it happen!): healthy moms, healthy babies, and a healthy future that begins before the beginning.

All of my passionate, purple-wearing friends at
WhatToExpect.com
, (especially Michael Rose and Diane Otter, Ben Wolin and Scott Wolf, the awesome edit and product team) for making my online and mobile home feel, well, like home. I love working with you, because it never feels like work. My beautiful, sweet, nurturing publicist and friend, Heidi Schaeffer. And the other men in my life: my agent, Alan Nevins, and my attorney, Marc Chamlin.

The amazing USO, for partnering with the What to Expect Foundation to
create Special Delivery—and give me the opportunity to hug so many military mamas and babies.

And most of all, to the mamas and daddies who sacrifice sleep, showers, and sit-down meals to nurture the babies we all get to love on. You inspire me every moment of every day. So much love, especially, to my
WhatToExpect.com
family of families, as well as my Twitter and Facebook families (keep those baby fixes coming!).

Big hugs,

Contents

FOREWORD:
A New Baby Bible, by Mark D. Widome, M.D., M.P.H.

INTRODUCTION:
A Very Different First Year

Chapter 1

Get Ready, Get Set

Choosing Breast or Formula, or Both

Breastfeeding

When You Can't or Shouldn't Breastfeed

The Breast Team

Breastfeeding Myths

Formula Feeding

Your Feelings

Choosing to Circumcise or Not

Diaper Decisions

Choosing a Name

For Parents: Preparing an Older Child

Choosing Help

Baby Nurse

Help Wanted

For Parents: Prepping the Family Pet

Postpartum Doula

Grandparents

For Parents: Running Grandparent Interference

Choosing a Baby Doctor

Health Insurance for a Healthy Family

Pediatrician or Family Practitioner?

What Kind of Practice Is Perfect?

Finding Dr. Right

Topics to Discuss

Making Sure Baby Dr. Right Is Right for You

Chapter 2

Buying for Baby

Buying the Baby Basics

A Buyer's Guide

Wardrobe Wise

Baby Clothes

Baby's Linens

Diapers

The Bottom Line on Cloth Diapers

Baby's Grooming Supplies

The Green Scene

Baby's Medicine Cabinet

Baby Feeding Supplies

Feeding Chairs: As Your Baby Grows

Baby's Nursery

Crib Notes on Crib Safety

Bye-Bye, Bumpers

Safe Bedside Sleeping

Double Up on Diaper Stations

Gear for Outings

Seal of Approval

Car Seat Accessories to Skip

The LATCH System

A Place for Baby

Supervised Seating

Buying for Baby's Future

No Walkers Are Safe Walkers

Chapter 3

Breastfeeding Basics

Getting Started Breastfeeding

Getting the Breast Help

Breastfeeding 101

How Lactation Works

Getting Comfortable

Getting Into Position

Getting the Right Latch

Sucking Versus Suckling

Knowing How Long to Feed

Feeding Standard Time

Knowing How Often to Feed

What Type of Nurser Is Your Baby?

What You May Be Wondering About

Colostrum

Milk Stages

Engorged Breasts

Let-Down

Pain During Breastfeeding

For Parents: It Takes Three

Overabundant Milk

Leaking and Spraying

Cluster Feedings

Sore Nipples

Inverted Nipples

Bumps on the Road to Success?

Time Spent Breastfeeding

Mom Falling Asleep While Nursing

Breast Milk: It's Not Just for Breakfast Anymore

What to Wear

Nursing in Public

Tandem Nursing

I'll Have What He's Having

A Breast Lump

Mastitis

Favoring One Breast

Breastfeeding When You're Sick

Birth Control and the Breastfeeding Mom

Breastfeeding and Your Period

Time to Stock Up on Tampons?

Exercise and Nursing

Combining Breast and Bottle

Combo Amounts

Nipple Confusion Got You Confused?

When Formula Is Necessary

Relactation/Pumping Up Supply

Banking on Milk Banks

Breastfeeding an Adopted Baby

ALL ABOUT: Keeping Your Milk Healthy and Safe

What You Eat

Bone Up for Breastfeeding

Can Foods Make Milk?

What You Drink

What Medication You Take

Back on the Menu

What You Should Avoid

Chapter 4

A First Year Timeline: The First Year at a Glance

You Know Your Baby Best

Developmental Milestones in the First Year

It's Cumulative

Preemie Timing

Growth Charts

Chapter 5

Your Newborn

Your Baby's First Moments

Delayed Cord Clamping

Testing Your Baby

Apgar Test

For Babies Born at Home

Newborn Hearing Screening

Don't Forget to Cover Your Baby

Feeding Your Baby: Getting Started Formula Feeding

Need Help at the Breast?

Selecting a Formula

Formulas of Formula

How Much Formula?

Bottle-Feeding Safely

Do Add-Ins Add Up?

Bottle-Feeding Basics

Bottle-Feeding with Love

The Formula for a Happy Baby

What You May Be Wondering About

Birthweight

Weight Loss

Baby's Appearance

For Parents: Meeting, Greeting, and Bonding

Eye Ointment

Portrait of a Newborn

Bloodshot Eyes

Eye Color

Baby's Sleepiness

For Parents: Rooming-In

Gagging

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