Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex? (11 page)

WHY DID RABBITS DIE IN OLD PREGNANCY TESTS?

Hopefully most of you have forgotten the 1978 film
Rabbit Test,
directed by Joan Rivers, starring Billy Crystal as the world’s first pregnant man. If you haven’t heard of it, know this, it should have died like the rabbits in the early pregnancy tests.

The original pregnancy test really was a “rabbit test” and the rabbit always died. In the 1920s, scientists discovered a hormone known as human chorionic gonadotropin (hCG) that was produced early in pregnancy. It was also discovered that when injected into certain animals, the hCG would cause changes in animal ovaries. The first test, discovered by Selmar Aschheim and Bernhard Zondek, was performed on mice. In 1931, Maurice H. Friedman refined the test by using rabbits, and the rabbit or Friedman test was born. Human urine was injected into a rabbit and forty-eight hours later, the rabbit was killed and its ovaries were examined to determine if the person was pregnant or not.

Modern pregnancy tests are still based on measuring the amount of hCG present in urine or blood, without the use of a rabbit. The first home pregnancy tests were approved in 1976. Raucous celebrations were held in many rabbit families.

WHY DO YOU GET HAIRIER WHEN YOU ARE PREGNANT?

Many women notice that the hair on their head is thicker during pregnancy. They also may notice some new growth on their chin, upper lip, cheeks, breasts, belly, arms, legs, and back. Don’t worry, this growth is often subtle, and you won’t end up looking like a Wookie.

Pregnancy-induced hair growth usually develops during the first trimester. Just like most pregnancy changes, it is caused by a change in hormones. This growth usually abates six months after delivery. Some women may notice increased shedding of hair during this period. This is simply your body adjusting as hormone levels return to normal.

DO PREGNANT WOMEN REALLY GLOW?

If a pregnant woman asks her husband, “Am I glowing?” there is only one answer: “Yes, dear.”

Don’t worry about lying; the pregnancy glow actually exists and has a biological basis. In pregnancy, blood volume increases by almost 50 percent. This increased blood volume causes the cheeks of women to take on a reddish blush. Pregnancy hormones also cause increased secretions from the oil glands, and this leaves the face nice and shiny. The end result…a beautiful glow.

But not all of pregnancy’s dermatological changes are pleasant. We already mentioned that you can get hairier. You also may develop spider veins in your legs from the increased blood flow and hormones.

Skin over the stretching abdomen can become very itchy, and you also may be unlucky enough to develop PUPP or pruritic urticarial papules and plaques of pregnancy. This is a fancy term for itchy bumps that develop in the second half of pregnancy on the abdomen, thighs, butt, and legs of about 1 percent of pregnant women.

WHY DO YOUR NIPPLES TURN BROWN IN PREGNANCY?

If you have dark skin, you may have brown nipples before pregnancy, but many pregnant women of all complexions notice that their nipples have become somewhat darker.

As we keep mentioning, pregnancy causes changes in hormone levels, duh! In this case, an increase in estrogen levels and melanocyte-stimulating hormone (MSH) levels causes the changes. MSH acts on melanocytes. These are cells within the skin that determine the degree of pigmentation. The face and the belly are two areas where darkening of the skin can be most noticeable.

Some pregnant women experience the “mask of pregnancy” or chloasma, an array of brownish or yellowish patches on the facial skin, unevenly distributed on the forehead, temples, and middle of the face. This is more common in women with dark hair and pale skin. Chloasma cannot be prevented, but you can minimize the intensity of these darkened areas by limiting your exposure to sunlight. These marks will usually fade completely after delivery.

Then there is the dark line on the belly, the linea negra. In many women, there is a normal faint (barely visible) white line, the linea alba, running from the navel to the center of their pubic bone. During pregnancy in the second trimester, extra pigment in the skin causes a darkening of this line. The linea nigra is darker in darker-skinned women and fades after delivery too.

WHAT CAUSES SEVERE LEG CRAMPS AT NIGHT DURING PREGNANCY?

Has your pregnant wife begged you to rub her legs? Have you noticed that occasionally she shakes her leg like a dog having its belly rubbed?

Here is another problem that women experience in pregnancy, the presence of leg cramps. Some women also can get an uncomfortable, jittery sensation running in both legs known as restless leg syndrome. These conditions are intermittent but they can be very disturbing, particularly at night.

Leg cramps have always been a difficult condition for doctors to treat. Leg cramps affect almost half of all pregnant women, but the cause of leg cramps during pregnancy is not fully understood. Leg cramps are more common in the second and third trimesters of pregnancy and happen most often at night. Cramps may be the result of the extra weight carried during this time and the pressure that it places on the legs. Changes in circulation also can affect the legs. Some older theories have been that deficiencies in salt, magnesium, or calcium caused these cramps but no study has shown any connection to calcium. Sodium supplementation might decrease the number of leg cramps in pregnancy but the effect is very small. The benefit for magnesium is stronger. Magnesium supplementation (magnesium lactate or citrate) might help and low doses shouldn’t be harmful. Be sure, however, to ask your doctor before taking any supplements.

Other simple tips for leg cramps include:

Stay well hydrated.

Stretch and massage your calf muscles.

Exercise.

Blame your husband for getting you into this mess!

IS IT TRUE THAT BABIES CAN BE BORN WITH TEETH?

Sounds like a scene from a horror film. A baby is delivered and opens its mouth to reveal a full set of chompers. Then the little devil begins to chew his way through the delivery room staff….

It ain’t gonna happen! But scary as it sounds, babies
can
be born with teeth. They are called natal teeth and these teeth are present at the time of birth. Neonatal teeth erupt within thirty days of delivery.

Natal teeth generally develop on the lower gum and there are usually only two or three of them. They don’t have strong roots and are often loose. Natal teeth are uncommon, and found in only one in every two thousand to six thousand births. Natal teeth may cause irritation and trauma to the infant’s tongue while he or she is nursing. They also may be uncomfortable for a nursing mother. (No kidding!)

If the natal teeth are loose, they should be removed shortly after birth while the newborn infant is still in the hospital. A loose natal tooth could be swallowed and the child could be at risk for aspiration.

SHOULD PREGNANT WOMEN AVOID CATS AND KITTY LITTER?

This is all about toxoplasmosis, an infection caused by a parasite called
Toxoplasma gondii.
Cat feces and kitty litter are a major source of toxoplasmosis since cats are a natural host for this parasite that reproduces in their intestines. Toxoplasmosis can also be found in raw or undercooked meat or in contaminated soil. The Centers for Disease Control (CDC) estimate that only about 15 percent of women of childbearing age are immune to toxoplasmosis. The infection caused by the parasite is minor in healthy individuals, but the risk lies in the fact that this infection could be passed on to your baby.

An estimated four hundred to four thousand cases of congenital toxoplasmosis occur in the United States each year. Congenital toxoplasmosis can cause miscarriage, stillbirth, or death shortly after birth. Congenital toxoplasmosis can also affect your baby’s brain, causing mental retardation, seizures, blindness, and death.

Don’t fear: most cases of congenital toxoplasmosis can be prevented by educating women of childbearing age and pregnant women to avoid eating raw or undercooked meat, and wear gloves while gardening and, if possible, have someone else change the kitty litter. (If you’re pregnant and you have to clean the cat’s commode, try to wear gloves and be sure to wash carefully.)

CAN SQUIRTING BREAST MILK IN A BABY’S EYE HELP A CLOGGED TEAR DUCT?

This question came from Billy’s sister, who gained nationwide notoriety during an embarrassing moment on
The Today Show,
when Matt Lauer revealed that she referred to her brother as “Dummy Doctor.” So how does she expect Dummy Doctor to be able to answer obscure questions like this one? She should know that there is no class in medical school on the ocular applications of breast milk.

We
were
able to find some references to the therapeutic uses of breast milk. Human breast milk contains various antimicrobial compounds. Some of these compounds have been shown to fight off bacteria such as
Escherichia coli, Salmonella enteritidis,
and
Staphylococcus epidermidis.

If your baby has a clogged tear duct, the first step is to see your pediatrician. The doctor will probably teach you to gently wipe the yellow discharge out of your baby’s eyes and to massage the tear ducts. You also can apply breast milk if you are breast-feeding. All you need to do is express a couple drops of your milk onto the tip of a clean finger and gently place them in the corner of the draining eye.

CAN SLEEPING ON YOUR BACK HURT THE BABY?

When a pregnant woman arrives at the hospital in labor, we tell her to lie on her left side rather than lying flat on her back. The rationale behind this is that on your back, the baby can cause compression of the vena cava, a major blood vessel that passes under the uterus. During labor, a contraction itself can reduce blood flow to the baby and that compression on this vessel can exacerbate this decrease in blood flow.

A healthy baby can tolerate this without any difficulty, especially if you are not in labor. So don’t worry if you sleep on your back. Get rest while you still have a chance.

WHY SHOULDN’T PREGNANT WOMEN DYE THEIR HAIR?

There are several studies that look at the relationship between maternal hair dyes and childhood diseases, including childhood brain tumors. Don’t expect to find any information that praises the health benefits of hair dyeing, but you won’t find any evidence that it is particularly dangerous either.

Even though there are no studies linking hair dyes to any prenatal toxicity, many conservative doctors tell their patients to pass on going platinum until after the baby is born. The truth is that it is probably fine to get some highlights and an occasional color rinse, but you probably shouldn’t soak your head in a vat of dye nightly—plus, your hair would fall out.

WILL PLAYING MUSIC TO YOUR BABY MAKE IT CALMER, SMARTER, AND HEALTHIER?

We had to send Leyner—that polyglot punk—to the Bulgarian literature on this one. In a 2004 edition of
Akusherstvo i Ginekologiia
he came across an article about the “Effect of Music on Fetal Behavior.” This study found that music stimulation did cause changes in fetal heart rate and body movement. Other studies have tried to evaluate whether exposure to music in utero could lead to fetal learning and they found similar responses.

Theoretically, exposure to music could lead to learning, but there isn’t any science to support this. Some call the possible connection the “Mozart Effect,” but there isn’t any proof that listening to
The Magic Flute
will produce a prodigy.

If you believe in the Mozart Effect, you can probably wait until about week 24, because that is when the fetus begins to recognize sounds.

ARE SUMMER PREGNANCIES MORE LIKELY TO RESULT IN TWINS?

There are several studies that have sought to determine a relationship between twin birth rate and the season of birth. Other studies have examined the effects of temperature on human fertility. When you look carefully at all of these studies, there is a slight but statistically significant tendency for conceptions that occur in summer to result in twins.

Some think that this is a result of sunlight stimulating the hormone FSH in women, which in turn increases the likelihood of a multiple birth.

IS IT TRUE THAT ALL BABIES ARE BORN WITH BLUE EYES?

Blue eyes Baby’s got blue eyes
—Elton John

Need we say more? Well, maybe we should at least explain a little. Eye color is determined by the amount of a single pigment called melanin that is present in the iris of the eye. Melanin is a dark brown pigment. If a lot of melanin is present, the eye will appear brown or even black. If very little melanin is present, the iris will appear blue. Less melanin produces green, gray, or light brown eyes.

In general, Caucasian babies are born with blue eyes because melanin hasn’t been deposited in the irises of their eyes yet. African, Asian, Hispanic, and Native American babies, on the other hand, are often born with brown or black eyes. Melanin production generally increases during the first few months of a baby’s life, after which eye color changes and the color is stable by about six months of age.

IS IT TRUE THAT SOME PEOPLE EAT THE PLACENTA?

The closest thing that we found when looking for documentation of human placentophagia was that certain mammals do eat the placenta. Oh, and Billy’s friend Gail likes Polenta. But that really doesn’t have much to do with the answer.

The Internet has many references to eating the placenta and recipes abound. It is unclear whether this is actually done. Many ancient cultures revered the placenta. The Navajo felt that the placenta was sacred but poisonous. The Shilluk, a Sudanese people on the West Nile, apparently practiced a symbolic ingestion of the afterbirth. They buried the placenta at the roots of a fruit tree, and the following season ritualistically ate the fruit and drank tea made from the fruit. Human placenta has also been an ingredient in some traditional Chinese medicines.