A Life Restored (31 page)

“Who is the father?”

Her tears flowed freely then.
 
In a low whisper, she replied, “Thomas.”

Adam’s brows moved together forming a frown.

“How?
 
When?”

Caroline bristled at the invasive questions, even if they did come from her brother.
 
“Before Christmas.
 
It was the last time I saw him—the last time he was in Prescott—before the blizzard.”

“Did he force himself on you?”

“No.”

Adam shook his head for several minutes, saying nothing.

She took the seat across from him, waiting for him to do something.
 
She envisioned several possibilities.
 
He would take her back to the ranch today, make her quit her job and pack up everything.
 
Or he would yell at her for being foolish.

“What do you plan to do about it?”

She hadn’t expected that.
 
“Do?”

“Yes.
 
Will you try to find a husband to care for you and your child?
 
Will you move back to the ranch and allow me to support you?
 
What will you do, Caroline?”

She swallowed.
 
In a soft voice, she said, “I’m hoping Thomas will come back and marry me and we can raise our child together.”

Silence thickened as Adam rubbed his hand across his forehead.

“And if he doesn’t come back?”

“I…
 
I don’t know.”

“It’s going to be hard.
 
Raising a child, working—if Abraham will allow you to keep your job.”

She blinked.
 
He knew her well.
 
He knew she wouldn’t want to move back to the ranch.
 
He knew she wouldn’t want to snag up the first man that crossed her path.

“I know.
 
But, if it is what I must do, then I will do it.”

“You don’t have to.
 
You can come home.
 
Stay with me and Julia.”

“Oh, I’m sure that’s exactly what you want.
 
Newly married with a pregnant wife and a pregnant sister in the house.
 
Then when the babies come?
 
Two newborns under your roof?”

“I would do it if I must.”

“Well, I hope it won’t come to that.
 
I hope Thomas,” her voice cracked betraying her true lack of confidence.
 
“I hope he will return soon.
 
Or that Abraham will let me keep my job.”

“When will you tell Abraham?”

“Soon.
 
I suppose I will have to after today.”

Adam nodded.
 
Then he sighed.
 
Then he drummed his fingers on the table.
 
“I shouldn’t give you an option.
 
I should just take you back today.”

“But you won’t?”

He shook his head.
 
“It’s your choice.
 
You made it all the way here without my protection.
 
You’ve been living on your own for some time now.
 
I’m here if you need me, but I won’t tell you what you should do.”

“You don’t hate me, do you?”

Adam stood and gathered her into his arms.
 
“I don’t hate you, Linny.
 
I never could.
 
I’m disappointed.
 
I know you will face pain from the things the townsfolk will say about you.
 
Your child may grow up with whispered rumors.
 
My heart hurts for you and your child.
 
But hate you?
 
No.”

“You’re a good man.”

He released the embrace.
 
“Tell Abraham today.
 
But, try to keep it from others as long as you can.
 
I may tell Julia, but other than that, not a soul will hear of it from me.”

“Thank you.”

He squeezed her hand.
 
“Shall we go and finish up my shopping list?”

She nodded and then preceded him down the stairs and back into the mercantile.

Later, long after Adam left, and just before they closed the store for the day, Caroline told Abraham.
 
She made him swear he would not tell a soul.
 
He agreed.
 
And he did let her keep her job.
 
As long as she wanted it, she could have it.
 
He told her he could not possibly send a woman away to fend for herself if he didn’t have to.

She thanked him before returning to the solitude of her room.

Things would be so much easier if Thomas would return.
 
He could marry her and they would raise the child together.
 
People would talk about the timing of the birth of the child from the wedding, but it wouldn’t matter.
 
Her child would grow up with a father and people would eventually forget.

She just needed Thomas to come home.

Chapter 32

Thomas threw his cane across the corral in frustration.
 
No matter how many times he tried, he still could not get his left foot into the stirrup.
 
Short of overturning a crate and standing on it, there was not even a tiny possibility of him mounting a horse.

It irked him.

For the past few years he made his living on the back of a horse.
 
He felt at home there.
 
He felt like a man there.
 
Riding was the one positive thing that defined him.
 
He took the opportunity given to him as a dispatch rider during the war and he turned it into a good job afterward.

He had to ride.

Leaning his head against the flank of the horse, he closed his eyes.
 
Perry would tell him to pray.

Lord, I want to ride again.
 
How can I provide for Caroline if I can’t ride?

Guilt threatened to extinguish the sliver of hope in his heart that he would one day be able to ride again.
 
No matter how many times he asked God to forgive him for what he did to Caroline, he could not forgive himself.
 
Worse yet, if he couldn’t figure out some way to provide for her…

He wasn’t trusting God.
 
He was still trying to figure it all out on his own.
 
“Then show me what to do.”

The horse snorted at the sound of his voice.
 
He opened his eyes and stepped back.
 
Looking around, he found his cane near the stable entrance to the corral.
 
Slowly he limped to it.
 
Bending down, he picked up his cane from the ground before shuffling back to the horse.
 
Taking the reins, he led her inside and removed the saddle.

He just finished brushing the horse down when Perry returned from an afternoon out with his herd.

“How are you doing today?” Perry asked the same question he had every afternoon for nearly a month.

“Fine.”

Thomas hesitated as Perry began unsaddling his mount.
 
He wondered if he should bring up returning to Prescott again.
 
It had been a few weeks since they last spoke of it.

Plowing ahead he said, “When you planning on heading to town again?”

Perry sighed.
 
“Not sure.”

Thomas waited a few seconds for his temper to settle.
 
How long was Perry going to put him off?

“I need to get back.
 
I’m well enough to travel in a wagon.”

“I know.”

“If I could mount a blasted horse, I’d take myself back.
 
Why are you stalling?”

Perry grunted as he brushed down his horse.

Thomas moved closer trying to get a glimpse of Perry’s face.
 
Perry dodged his view.

“What’s going on?
 
Why won’t you take me back to Prescott?”

Perry didn’t acknowledge his questions.

“I have to get back to Caroline.”
 
He pleaded his case.

“Ha!
 
I’m sure you do.
 
Do you have any idea what is waiting for you when you return?”

Thomas swallowed.
 
The look in Perry’s eye told him he received some news—news that Thomas probably wasn’t going to like.

“Did she marry someone else?”

“No!”
 
Perry shouted.
 
“No one would have her.”

“Why not?
 
She’s wonder—”

“She’s pregnant.
 
With your child.”

Thomas’s heart slammed against his rib cage.
 
Staggering, he took a few steps back to lean against the stable wall, waiting for the words to make sense.

“At least that’s the rumor.
 
I’ve been asking the new express rider to find out whatever he could.
 
Turns out the rumor around town is that she is with child.
 
No one knows who the father is.”

Perry turned cold eyes toward him.
 
“But you do.”

The air grew thick in the stable.
 
The smell of hay and horse suddenly turned his stomach.
 
He felt trapped.
 
He had to get out of there.
 
Turning on his heel, he quickly headed for the barn door.

Perry chased after him and grabbed his arm.
 
Anger and accusation shrouded his words.
 
“
This
is why I haven’t taken you back.
 
Your reaction proves you haven’t changed at all.
 
You would run instead of doing what honor dictates.”

“I’m not running,” Thomas said breathlessly, as if he had been running and running hard.
 
The air refused to fill his lungs properly.

Perry snorted in disgust.
 
“You don’t deserve her.”

Thomas hung his head low.
 
“No, I don’t.
 
But, I love her.
 
And I will do what is right.”

Silence stretched for several minutes before Perry let out a long breath.

“I’ll take you this weekend.”

Unfortunately the joy he thought would come with those words felt vacant in light of what Perry just told him.
 
He would return to Prescott and marry Caroline as soon as possible.
 
Hopefully that would ease some of her shame and quiet the rumors.

“Whore,” a male voice accused as Caroline walked down the street toward Lancaster’s.

Caroline’s face heated, but she kept her eyes on the ground in front of her.
 
She’d been called much worse in the past few weeks as rumors circulated about her condition.
 
That nosy woman who first suspected truth wasted no time in making sure the entire town knew.

The name calling started, followed by cold shoulders and snobbish glares—some of them even came from church members.

It was all her due penance for her sin.

As she neared the back door at Lancaster’s, she looked up.
 
Betty hung laundry over the line to dry in the warming May sun.
 
She was one of the few who treated her no differently, despite the rumors.

Today, she needed a friend—especially after what that mean Robert Garrett said.
 
Seemed like he was in town an awful lot the past month or two.
 
It was a wonder his ranch survived without him as controlling as he seemed to be.

“Oh, dear!
 
What a pleasant surprise!”
 
Betty’s last words were muffled as she engulfed Caroline in a huge hug.

“I was hoping…
 
I could really use a good talk.”

“Sure thing, dear.
 
Just let me get these last few things on the line.
 
Why don’t you head into the house to the kitchen table?”

“You moved into the house?”

“Yes.
 
Paul really insisted.
 
He said he needed the space off of the dining hall kitchen for storage now.
 
I think it has more to do with him wanting to keep me close.
 
He’s living there and keeps telling me how much time he spent designing my room.
 
Why, I was just fine with the one I had.
 
But, sons—they can be demanding when they put their mind to it.”

Caroline smiled, but it quickly faded.
 
Would her child act that way?

“You go on now.
 
I’ll be right there.”

Caroline walked the short distance to the newest boardinghouse structure—a much more traditional boardinghouse like the ones she remembered from Texas.

She opened the door and stepped into a lovely parlor area.
 
A man in a nice suit looked up from the paper he was reading then quickly looked back down.
 
To her right, there was a small table with a register and to her left was a staircase.
 
She moved through the parlor and into the dining room.
 
It looked big enough to accommodate the boarders who stayed in the house, but not big enough for those in the bunkhouses.
 
Off to the right of the dining room was the kitchen.

Tentatively, she peeked in.
 
The small room had a quaint table in one corner and a brand new iron stove in the other.
 
Pantry shelves lined one wall above a workspace area.
 
The basin stand was near the stove, but not too close that the heat of the stove would become overwhelming.
 
What a lovely place Betty had to work.

Spying the coffee pot on the back of the stove, she checked it.
 
Empty.
 
Instead of waiting to be served, she found the coffee beans, ground them with the hand cranked grinder, and set a fresh pot on to brew.

She took a seat in one of the chairs at the table just as Betty bounded into the room.

“Coffee should be almost ready,” Caroline offered.

“Thank you, dear.
 
Now tell me, what brings you here—and before the store is closed for the day.
 
Abraham didn’t let you go did he?”

“No.
 
He told me to take the rest of the day off after an unruly customer upset me.”

“I see.”

Betty handed her a cup of steaming coffee and pushed two little containers of creamer and sugar toward her.

Caroline launched into her story as she fixed her coffee.
 
“Robert Garrett came into the store this afternoon.”

“He’s that rancher that you think was involved in the stage robbery?”

“Yes.
 
Well, he started spouting off all kinds of nonsense.
 
He said that he knew who my baby’s father was.
 
How could he know that?”

“I don’t know, dear.”

“Anyway, he said that he saw Thomas down in Wickenburg.
 
Said he was drinking and bragging about how he dodged having to marry me.
 
He kept going on in great detail about Thomas and the soiled dove hanging on his arm.”

Betty frowned.

“You don’t think it’s true, do you?” Caroline asked.

Betty thought for a moment.
 
“I don’t think so.
 
If Mr. Garrett is who you think, he may just be telling you stories to upset you—sort of throw you off.
 
Keep you from being certain he was involved in the robbery.”

“Or maybe it’s his way of paying me back.
 
Maybe he wishes he would have just killed me then.”

Betty patted her hand.
 
“No matter his reason for doing it, I don’t believe what he’s saying.”

“Why?
 
Why don’t you believe it?”

“Because, deep in his heart, Thomas is a good man.
 
He has a sense of honor.
 
Others might not see it, but I’ve always seen it.
 
It’s that same sense of duty that his brother had.
 
You know, he’s more like Drew than he thinks.
 
He’s just been carrying around too much bitterness to see it.”

Caroline took a sip of her coffee as she considered Betty’s words.
 
When Robert first said all those things to her, she believed them.
 
But now, hearing Betty’s thoughts, she wasn’t so sure.

“But why has he been gone so long?
 
Why doesn’t he come back if he has all this honor?”

“Dear, I think God is keeping him away.”

Confusion swirled in her heart.
 
“What do you mean?”

“I think the good Lord has been working on him.
 
Working on him real hard.
 
Chipping away at that bitterness and anger he carries around.
 
Cleaning out his guilt.
 
Thomas blames himself for his brother’s death.
 
And there’s something more, though I don’t know what.
 
I think maybe the Lord is using this time to deal with Thomas on these things.”