Always Remember (10 page)

In the end, they’d lost anyway.

From near the half built stage, a deep, masculine voice hollered for Nate’s attention. “Coltrane, you’re late again.”

Jessie dragged her gaze away from his profile and shielded her eyes against the brightness of the sun. “I suppose that’s my fault. Sorry.”

He shrugged his broad shoulders and shifted around to face her. “No problem. Want me to introduce you around or something?”

She glanced at the grass, at the shade of a tall, pine tree, and flashed him a smile. “Maybe I’ll just sit this one out. You don’t need me getting in the way.”

Her senses were consumed by his panther-like grace and by the light, teasing scent of aftershave as he circled around her. He stopped behind her and she realized all she had to do was lean back and she’d be in his arms, absorbing the heat of his body into her own.

His seductive voice whispered into her ear. “All you have to do is turn that hundred watt smile on them instead of me, sweetheart, and you’ll have them eating out of your hands.”

Someone shouted for Nate again, the cheerful tone gone, replaced by annoyance. Over her shoulder, she encountered Nate’s gaze, his look so intense, so dreamy, a woman could get lost forever.

He looked like he wanted to kiss her again. And heaven help her, she wanted his mouth against hers, evoking the passion they’d once so readily shared. “I think he needs your help.”

“Mike’ll wait.”

Nate’s hands settled at her waist, throwing her off kilter. She held her breath, not wanting to move away from his touch, yet afraid if she didn’t, she’d melt at his feet.

“Come on, Jess. I’ll help you get reacquainted with some old friends.”

Old friends.
Once, she’d had so many of them and Nate had been the best one of all.

“Quit playing Don Juan, Coltrane, and get your butt to work.”

Jessie pulled her gaze away from Nate’s face as Mike Toryn strode across the pavement. He looked like a man with a purpose, his long legs stretched to the limit, the still youthful features of his face lined with irritation.

“I need to get back to the ranch, man. I promised Hannah I wouldn’t be gone more than a couple of hours.”

“Don’t get mad at Nate, Mike. He’s late because of me.”

Mike stopped in his tracks, a whistle escaping the clench of his teeth. “Well, I’ll be damned. You’re the last person I expected to see with—” A cocky grin curved his mouth. “Jessie Adams and Nate Coltrane together again. Just like old times, eh?”

“Yeah, old times,” Nate muttered.

Jessie didn’t miss the derision in Nate’s voice or the quickness with which he broke off physical contact and shifted to her side, a cautious twelve inches separating them.

“Say, Jessie. We’re heading over to Phil’s after we’re done here tonight. Why don’t you tag along with this ugly critter and join us?”

One look at Nate’s woebegone expression and she knew what he was thinking. She shook her head. “I don’t want to be a bother.”

Nate shrugged and squinted toward the stage. “No bother. Mike and George’ll get a kick out of it.”

What about you?
she wanted to ask. But as he strode away, leaving her behind, she knew the answer.
Get in, get out. He doesn’t want you in his life.

Beside her, Mike cleared his throat and shifted from one foot to another. “Did I say something wrong?”

She could do this, pretend she wasn’t hurting inside. It was what she did every day of her life. “He gets moody when I’m around, that’s all.”

“He was moody when you weren’t around.” Mike slipped his arm around her shoulders and urged her toward the stage. “Ignore him. That’s what I do. Now about tonight.”

He talked on beside her, but her attention remained fixed on Nate. Why couldn’t they pretend the past didn’t exist? Start over with a clean slate? Forever seemed like an awful long time to suffer the mistakes of her youth.

CHAPTER TWELVE

Nate leaned against the stage front and watched as the townsfolk surrounded Jessie. Her beautiful smile and down home, country girl look drew people to her like a flower drew bees.

She slipped in and out of her stage persona with the ease of one long used to pretending and maybe if he hadn’t once known her so well, he might have been taken in by her performance. But he’d seen the cracks in her armor and he didn’t want to delve deeper.

Then why the hell hadn’t he left her back at the ranch? He’d have been a whole lot safer if he’d walked across the yard, saddled Diablo, and let the stallion plant him in the dirt face first.

Because having Jessie back in his life again was downright scary. If they picked up where they’d left off, losing his heart to her would be the least of his worries.

Nate saw Mike escape the group around Jessie and make his way to join him at the stage.

“Hey, man, ready to get to work?”

Nate turned his back on the crowd and pulled a hammer out of his pouch. “You bet.”

For a few peaceful minutes, they worked in relative silence, pounding nails into the wood, and Nate let himself relax and enjoy the physical work. Then Mike sidled up beside him.

“So how are you doing?”

Nate pulled out his tape measure and clipped the tape onto the board in front of him. “The steps are almost done.”

“That’s not what I meant. How are you managing with Jessie back at the ranch?”

Nate straightened his back, and as his attention shifted to Jessie, he pulled his cowboy hat off his head and wiped his shirtsleeve against his forehead. The crowd around her remained and he wondered how she dealt with the pressure of being under constant scrutiny. “I’m okay. I mean, you know, I’m dealing.”

“If you want to talk, I’m a good listener.”

As Mike shifted away and returned to work on the floorboards, Nate returned to work, measuring and cutting and nailing. But she stayed firmly in his thoughts.

What did he want from her, anyway? A warm body in his bed or something more? He couldn’t afford the
something more
.

A few minutes later, Mike’s voice interrupted his thoughts again. “Have you heard from Sara?”

Nate forced the tension from his muscles. “She called last night and wants to come home.”

“Can’t blame her, what with Maude sick and all. You know, she’ll never forgive you for sending her away.”

No, she wouldn’t. But then, there were a lot of things she’d never forgive him for. Before the guilt consumed what was left of his peace, Nate picked up the board and headed to the table saw. “We better pick up our pace or we’ll be here all night.”

Across the park, his gaze locked with Jessie’s. He stopped, awareness tingling along his nerve endings, and realized that he’d been a fool to believe he’d be able to resist her, that she’d feel any different in his arms.

The moment in her bedroom, when he’d held her and kissed her, had confirmed the suspicion he’d been harboring since he picked her up at the airport. She was so embedded in his memories that even after a seventeen-year absence, he’d have recognized her in the dark. By the feel of her in his arms. The fragrance of her skin. The way she kissed him back.

Like she didn’t ever want to stop.

Nate turned on the table saw and the motor drowned out the noise of the crowd around her.

Jessie within touching distance was as dangerous to his health as Diablo. Possibly more so. Diablo could only split his head open. Jessie could break his heart into pieces.

But only, he reminded himself, if he allowed himself to become emotionally involved. He’d learned his lesson years ago when she’d walked out on him. Stay detached. Keep his distance.

Across the park, Mattie had Jessie in hand, dragging her from group to group, introducing her to everyone. Nate frowned and forced himself to concentrate on the construction of the stage.

Hammers pounded around him, drowning out everything but the unsteady beat of his own heart. He found himself focusing on Jessie again, the eyes he’d cursed for so long burned into his memories. Sadness lingered in their depths, an aching, empty loneliness that called to mind his own life.

Could years of loneliness be erased in a single night? Or would it take longer, like maybe a lifetime of nights? Hell, he should concentrate on where he was whacking the hammer or he’d wind up with a flattened thumb.

He managed to
almost
ignore her for the better part of an hour, until that worm Bobby
I’ve-got-it-in-for-you
Hansen, gossip mongrel for the local paper, strode by.

“Hey, Coltrane.” The man waved his tablet under Nate’s nose. “Heard your girlfriend’s back in town. Planning a reconciliation?”

Dread converged in his gut. He tucked the hammer and nails into his pouch, and watched the reporter head for Jessie. As Nate started after him, Mattie stepped into his path and he nearly collided with her.

“Isn’t this wonderful, Nate? I’ve already contacted the newspaper to let them know Jessie would be here for the kickoff show.”

His heartbeat quickened. Panic devoured what was left of his composure. The empty-headed twit didn’t have a clue about the can of worms she could open up. “Hell, Mattie, don’t you think Jessie’s got enough to worry about with her mom and all? You should have checked with me first.”

“But, Nate, she agreed—”

“To an interview? Maybe you should’ve asked her if she wanted that kind of publicity before you went and arranged it.”

“But she said she’d do anything to help out.”

Nate got a sudden, unexpected urge to grab Jessie by the hand, round up Sara from the ski trip, and get the hell out of Dodge.

“Besides, I already promised Bobby the interview.” Mattie’s bottom lip quivered and tears filled her cornflower blue eyes. “I’ll look like a fool if you chase him off now. And so will you.”

He clenched his teeth, and before the inevitable waterworks started, edged away. “You tell him to stay away from the ranch. At least give Jessie the privacy she needs there.”

Her head bobbed up and down, like the ornamental dog he’d seen on the back window ledge of her car. Nate turned away from her, refocused on the steps leading up to the stage, and tried not to think of Jessie.

Standing in the crowd, she looked comfortable, perfectly at ease. And every time she smiled and laughed, Nate stilled the urge to rush over and swoop her away to safety. Because somehow he knew.

If he offered her the chance to run, she’d take his hand without question.

Keeping her expression neutral, Jessie kept her attention fixed on the reporter.

Bobby Hansen appeared comfortable and confident as he leaned against the chair back, a tablet in one hand and a deceptively warm smile on his face. But she knew his type. They loved to dig deep until they found the dirtiest of the dirt.

Her heart skipped a beat. She could feel the moisture bead on her upper lip, between her breasts, and she couldn’t fool herself into believing it had anything to do with the warm sun beating down on her head.

“Typical Jessie Adams. Loyal. Devoted to her career. Renowned queen of noble deeds.” Bobby leaned forward, his gaze intent, watchful. “What horrible sin did you commit that makes you feel you have to atone for your mistakes over and over and over again?”

Easing her hold on the chair arms before the reporter noticed her white knuckled grip, she forced a friendly smile to her lips. “Let’s see. It was a hot afternoon in the city. I indulged in my favorite fantasy. Chocolate ice cream loaded with hot fudge topping.”

“Come on, Jessie,” Bobby complained as he slouched back in the chair. “I remember that story. You bought enough ice cream to feed an entire homeless shelter.”

She pushed herself to her feet and wiped her sweaty palms on the seat of her jeans. She felt like running and hiding and never showing her face in public again for fear someone might discover the truth and announce it to the world. And to Nate.

“Why have you stayed away from your family and your home for so many years?”

Shrugging, she eased the stiffness from her legs, the fear from her heart, and forced a smile to take the sting from her words. “Guess you’ll have to make up something, Bobby. That won’t be a problem, will it?”

The reporter came to his feet in one easy motion and tucked the tablet under his arm. “Mother dying and you still have time to help the needy. I don’t think I’ll need to make anything up, except—”

The smile that twisted his lips sent Jessie’s stomach into a tailspin.

“—I’m curious about your last year of high school. You disappeared and no one knew where you had gone. What was up with that?”

Jessie shrugged. “I had an opportunity to jumpstart my career, so I took it.”

“Sure, you headed to Nashville and started making a name for yourself. But then you fell off the map, disappeared for months.” He leaned toward her, forcing her to take a step back. “I’m going to find out your secret, Jessie. Everyone has something to hide.”

“Not everyone,” she said softly before turning her back on him. With legs trembling, she squinted against the glare of the sun reflecting off the pavement and saw Nate pounding nails into the wooden stage.

Not everyone had secrets. Some people lived better lives than others. Like Nate. He’d been the most open, honest person she’d ever known. The most gentle, the most willing to offer his help to anyone with a need.