Always Remember (19 page)

Uh, oh.
Jessie tried not to panic. Somehow, she kept her voice steady. “You came to the right person, sweetie. I’m a professional secret keeper.”

“I just...I have this problem and I have to decide what to do about it.”

Jessie swallowed around the lump in her throat. “Okay. Spill.”

The girl peered around, checking to see if anyone was close enough to hear. Jessie automatically followed suit, her gaze drifting to Nate. Guilt started deep in her stomach. Another secret. Another lie. What the hell was she getting herself into this time?

“I’m pregnant.”

Pregnant? As Jessie’s jaw went slack, her first instinct was to turn tail and run, but there was so much misery in the girl’s voice, she forced herself to stay put.

“Yeah, I know what you’re thinking. Stupid kid. Why didn’t she use protection?” Sara closed her eyes and nodded her head. “We did...most of the time.”

“Hale is the father?”

Sara nodded and slid her a sideways glance. “You’re not gonna tell Dad, are you?”

Jessie pressed one finger against her mouth. Did she have the right to get involved? This was Nate’s daughter, not hers. Would he appreciate her interference? Probably not.
Definitely
not.

Yet, she knew exactly how Sara was feeling — scared, miserable, alone. She couldn’t abandon the girl, not if she ever wanted to face herself in the mirror again. “Have you thought of what you want to do, sweetie?”

“I need to talk to Hale before I talk to anyone else.”

“That’s best.”

“I’m scared, Jessie. And my dad is going to kill me.”

Jessie caught Sara’s hand and gave it a squeeze. “We’ll work this out together, sweetie. First talk to Hale.”

“And then?”

“Then your dad.”

Jessie glanced toward the stage. Nate stood on the wooden platform, watching them, a frown creasing his brow. Could he see how upset Sara was? She pushed to her feet and urged the girl up. “You’ve got two days to tell Hale. Then we’re going to your father. Understand?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Go. You’re dad’s watching. Try not to appear upset. Just a couple of days and we’ll get everything out in the open.”

Sara disappeared into the crowd and Jessie felt her heart melt in her chest. If ever there was someone who could make her do something against her will, it would be Nate’s daughter, a feminine version of her father right down to the way she kicked her toe into the dirt. But, another lie? What had she been thinking?

Pulling her gaze from Sara’s stiff back, she turned her attention to Nate, for just a moment allowing the memories of what they’d once shared flood her thoughts. They’d been so good together once, on stage and off. A match made in heaven, their friends used to tease them. If only she hadn’t gotten pregnant that summer. If only her mother hadn’t interfered and taken control of her life.

She strode across the lawn toward the stage. The brim of her hat shielded her eyes from the harsh glare of the sun as she watched Nate direct the set up of lights and equipment. Did he have any idea that his little girl wasn’t quite as innocent as she appeared? Was he afraid he’d lose her like he lost Jessie?

Silly thoughts. Wishful reflections. He probably never even though of her like that. Her gaze traced the t-shirt and the taunt muscles beneath. Strengthened by years of tireless work, his body was sculptured and beautiful. Desire flared in her belly, heavy and insistent.
Time for a cool down.
Making a detour toward the spruce trees, she grabbed up a handful of snow and held it against her throat, closing her eyes as she felt her body temperature drop.

Cold, refreshing. Almost as good as stepping barefoot into a mountain stream. Moisture dribbled down her neck and between her breasts. She opened her eyes and her gaze collided with the banked blue fire of Nate’s. He stilled, like a panther sensing its prey nearby. His nostrils flared. His muscles tensed. The smile on his face vanished, his mouth firming with tension.

 
Every sense came to life as Jessie started toward the stage, drawn closer by the intangible thread of memories they shared. Desire, love, respect. Once they’d been best friends. Why did she have to make him her enemy?

Her fingertips tingled with the urge to touch him, to experience the sensation of muscles rippling beneath her palms. Dizziness that had absolutely nothing to do with the hot sun left her feeling lightheaded and agitated. In an attempt to drag her thoughts in another direction, she turned away from him and pressed the snow against the back of her neck.

“What are you doing?” His voice, deep and intimate, caressed her body and mind. He was so close the warmth of his breath brushed her earlobe. Through her cotton shirt, she absorbed the heat of his body, all the more startling against her snow-cooled flesh. She turned her head slightly to peer at him over her shoulder. Her gaze fell on his mouth and stalled.

“Nothing much.”
Nothing except watching you notice every woman but me.

His lips, inches from her own, roused the temptation to test the desire that sprang so easily to life between them. She forced herself to look up into his eyes. A silent groan escaped, followed by the urge to tumble him to the stage and have her way with him. She’d wanted to do that an awful lot lately. She’d even succeeded once. In a way, it was too bad that he didn’t remember.

From a distance, Jessie had looked cool and frosty and totally untouchable. But up close...

Up close she looked like liquid fire. Hot enough to burn his fingertips and any other part of his body he dared press against her. A memory stirred. He pushed it away and focused on the single droplet of snow melting against her skin. It disappeared into her open shirt collar, vanished between her breasts, sparking a flash of jealousy that caught him by surprise.

A frown settled into place between his brows. He didn’t need the complication of her in his life, didn’t want to give his heart only to have it ripped from his chest again. Yet he couldn’t stop wondering, couldn’t stop wanting.

Remember Sara.

Yeah, there was only one way to stay sane. “Stay away from Sara, Jess. She’s mine.”

Without another word, Nate stalked away from her toward the corner of the stage where George was on his knees fumbling with a rainbow of colored wires.

“Another half hour, bud,” George mumbled around the wires sticking out of his mouth. “No need to hang around. I’ll finish this on my own.”

“Right, like last year. They called you into surgery and I ended up splicing wires together in the middle of the night.”

A shadow stretched across George’s back and a small hand gripped Nate’s bicep. Reluctantly, he faced Jessie, his last few brain cells scattering at the sight of her beautiful green eyes flashing up at him. The color reminded him of a secluded mountain lake they’d once discovered at the end of a long hike. They’d made love till nearly sunset and had to climb down the mountain in the dark of night. By the time they returned home, Sam was waiting on the front porch, shotgun in hand.

She puffed out an angry, “Hey, what was that all about?”

Nate gave himself a mental shake.
Sara, remember Sara.
“Leave my daughter alone. She’s not your concern.”

She looked as though he’d slapped her across the face, hurt and disbelieving. With an effort, he stopped himself from taking back the words. The Jessie of old would have melted into the stage and not said another word regarding the subject. But this woman straightened her back and glared at him with all the anger of a she-lion.

If only she knew.

“What’s wrong with you?” she demanded. “We were talking, that’s all.
Talking.
Nothing more.”

He lashed out, sorrowful and angry and frustrated. “What do you know about children, Jess? Have you raised one? Held her in your arms when she woke up, afraid and alone? Walked her through the night because her belly ached and she wouldn’t stop crying? Have you ever sent a child off into the big world? Watched her step onto the bus her first day of school, seen the fear in her eyes and felt like you were abandoning her?”

Unexpected, tears shimmered in her eyes. It hit him then, with the same force as slamming against the ground after mounting Diablo. Maybe she regretted her choice. Why not? He regretted a lot of choices he’d made. He grabbed her by the elbow and guided her from the stage, away from the curious eyes that seemed to follow her every movement. “Look, I’m sorry.”

She ripped her arm from his grip. “No, you’re not.”

Silence fell between them, ripe with expectancy, taut with unspoken words. A ragged breath escaped her and she turned her face to the side, giving him an excellent view of her profile. Bottom lip quivering, gaze fixed on the dirt at her feet. His chest tightened with emotion and he couldn’t stop himself from aching for her. Unexpected moisture dampened his eyes. He kicked his toe into the dirt and watched the cloud of dust rise, then settle.

Shifting to ease the ache in his lower back, he heard a reluctant sigh slip from between her lips.

“What’s wrong with your hip?”

Nate watched her tug the hat from her head and scrape the hair back from her face. “Nothing.”

“You’re rubbing it. And you’re limping. I’m sure of it.”

The damp blouse clung to her chest, outlining the curve of her breasts. A shudder passed through him. As though he had no control over it, his body quickened in response. He’d better stay away from her, far away, before he did something really stupid like make love with her...if it wasn’t already too late. “I gotta go. George needs my help.”

Lame excuse. Nate’s stomach felt heavy and uncomfortable when he returned to the stage, just like after he’d eaten one of Maude’s Thanksgiving dinners.

Please, dear God, don’t take Sara away from me.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

Sara pushed open the door of the bunkhouse and peered inside. She’d been searching for Hale all day. It was almost as though he sensed something was wrong and was avoiding her. “Hale, are you in here?”

The sound of running water reached her ears. She stepped inside, closed the door, and leaned against it. Waited. Tried not to anticipate his reaction.

Her stomach rolled over and she swallowed, prayed she wouldn’t throw up, not now, not here.
Please, God, please make him want our baby.

A door squeaked open and Hale wandered out of the bathroom, his chest bare, a damp towel slung around his neck. He stopped when he saw her, an easy smile spreading across his face.

It was a smile he reserved only for her, a smile that said ‘you know me like no one else knows me’. Yeah, she knew him. Her stomach tightened with dread.

“Hey, Sara. What’re you doing here?”

She glanced around. “Are we alone?”

The smile on his face grew, turned wolfish. “Now? Here? That’s kinda risky, isn’t it?”

She forced an answering grin to her mouth and pushed away from the door, sauntered over to where he stood. “I didn’t see you at the park today.”

“I had some errands to run.”

“Errands, huh?” Running one hand up the length of his chest, she caught him by the back of the head and pulled his face down towards hers. Their breaths mingled, their mouths fused together.
 

Sara savored the kiss and wondered if he’d still hold her so gently once she broke the news. He wrapped his arms around her, pressed her close, and all she could think of was how much she’d miss him if he left.
Please, God, please make him want my baby.

“Sara?” He lifted his head, wiped a thumb pad across her cheek. “Why are you crying?”

His image swam before her as she blinked her eyes open. She pushed away, embarrassed, choked because she hadn’t been able to control herself. She didn’t want to lose him. Sometimes, she felt like she needed him to breathe. But Hale had never hidden the fact that he didn’t want longevity or commitment. Her stomach rolled again and she slapped her hand over her mouth. She felt his hand on her shoulder, bringing her around to face him.

“Sara, honey? What’s wrong?”

Well, she could either blurt it out and get it over with, or tell him she’d met someone else. That ought to get him out of her life quick enough. She squared her shoulders and faced him, forced herself to meet his gaze. No, he didn’t deserve to be hurt. Maybe, just maybe, he’d changed in the months since he’d come here to live.

“Hale, I...I’m...damn it, there’s no easy way to say this.” She took a deep breath and felt as though she was about to plunge into a glacier stream, the aftershocks enough to kill her. “I’m pregnant.”

If granite had been a living, breathing person, his name would have been Hale. The sweet, gentle, caring man she’d loved for the past few months vanished in a heartbeat. He removed his hand from her shoulder, taking away any support she’d been hoping for, and stepped back, staring at her as though she’d betrayed him in the worst possible way.

Maybe she had. But she hadn’t planned the pregnancy. She was as much the victim of bad luck as he was.

“Whose baby is it, Sara?”

His words shot through the air between them, shattering her heart. How could he even think such a thing? She turned away, unable to face him, hurting so bad, yet knowing she was doing the right thing. If she really, truly loved him, she couldn’t burden him with their child. If she forced him to settle down, he’d eventually learn to hate her.