Amelia's Story (Box Set the Complete Series Books 1 & 2) (8 page)

Breeton House Children’s Home

Breeton House was a small children’s home on the outskirts of Shrewsbury Town and this was my second stay at the home, but my first time here with all of my siblings. We arrived late in the middle of the night; the staff members were pleasant enough – they had prepared supper for us, which we ate gratefully while standing around a large oak table in the large kitchen, drinking hot milk. Dotty the cook was still there from the last time I stayed. A care worker named Gill gave us some nightclothes to change into. I did not remember Gill from my first stay so assumed she was a new member of staff; she had a kind smile and a gentle persona. Gill then led us to our rooms, and said everyone else was asleep so urged us to be quiet so as not to wake anyone.

I remember that night as if it was yesterday; I was so scared of being put into a room with four other girls (who were fast asleep) I had a little bed in a corner of the room, which I ran to and buried myself beneath the sheets, crying myself to sleep. When I awakened the next morning I was too scared to leave my bed
, as I had soaked it during the night. I was ten-years-old and ashamed of my bed wetting and also scared that the other girls would taunt me, so I waited until they went down for breakfast. Then I took the sheets off my bed and put them in the laundry basket outside the dorm.

I took a bath, got myself dressed, then made my way to the nursery area to see Jenny and Susie who were having their hair brushed by a member of the nursery staff. They were smiling and seemed undeterred by their new surroundings. I on the other hand was much older and very aware why we were there, but for how long I had no idea. I waited with Susie and Jenny until they were ready to go down to the dining hall for breakfast as I did not want to go down alone.

On entering the large oak doors to the dining hall, I was greeted with a large room full of small tables which seated up to five children. Nearly all the tables were full except one reserved for us. I had never been so nervous; there were children of all different ages and race ranging from 3 to 15 years old. I remember thinking to myself, why are all these children here? Where are their parents? There were so many more here than the last time I stayed.

The room was full of chatter and laughter and a few children started to ask my name. I did not recognise any children from my previous visit; I imagine they had all moved on to other homes, foster parents, or even back home in some cases. Some of the children were very curious at our late night arrival the evening before; I just smiled at them and came over all shy. However, I was starting to sense a friendlier atmosphere which was a welcome surprise. I was feeling a little less nervous now
, I sat down to breakfast and had cornflakes with tea and toast.

A young girl called Leanne Tabbot took it upon herself to befriend me and show me the ropes! I liked her, she was a tomboy but as strange as it may sound, I could not help but notice she had very big breasts for someone so young. In fact, she looked liked a boy with boobs! Leanne was funny and well known for running away on a regular basis. There was another girl called Sonia Story who was very skinny and very shy. Jake and Sonia became very close friends; she was known very well for telling lies and when she wasn’t telling lies, she could be found telling tales! These are the two girls I remember the most as we shared a dormitory, but most of all we shared what few clothes we had and even our troubles and thoughts. As children do, we all fell out on a regular basis but we soon made up again, all smiles, and plotting how we would get into the pantry to sneak a packet of crisps once the kitchen was closed for the day!

Breeton House was not as bad as children’s homes go. We had three meals a day, we were washed and clothed and had activities arranged for us at weekends to keep us entertained. The staff were quite pleasant and they did what they could to make Breeton feel more like a home rather than a state residence. They worked on a shift basis and we each had our favourites, of course!

Schooling was outside of the grounds, unlike many homes where the schooling took place within the perimeters of the compound. I was again placed at
Mount Pleasant School for Girls the other side of Shrewsbury Town. I used to walk to school under the supervision of a member of staff (in case I ran away!) My escort would deliver me to the gates and pick me up at the gates.

Mount Pleasant
School for Girls was a decent school by all accounts; I did well and developed my English enormously while there. However, I was the only pupil in my school that came from a children’s home and they all knew it. This was not pleasant as I felt like an outcast surrounded by perfectly turned out girls. They looked immaculate from my stand point; they were dropped off by their parents and greeted by them at the end of the school day, much like before. I was not and that hurt a lot, making me feel like I did not belong. I tried very hard but started feeling rebellious, as not knowing where your true home is can be quite bad enough without being surrounded by children with what I classed as picture perfect lives. I wanted to be noticed and for someone to care about me – what every child is entitled to, a normal family.

Jake was enrolled into A. Fleming School for Boys; he liked his new school and was happy there. Our lives had become all about routine, something we were not accustomed to at all, but welcomed with ease. We had to be up at 7:00 A.M. breakfast at 7:30 A.M., lunch would be 12.30 P.M. and dinner at 5: P.M. Every single day the routine never changed, they had two cooks that were employed to come in and prepare the meals each day, but the clearing of the tables and the washing up after we had all eaten was done by the children.

Oh my goodness, I remember so well the endless piles of plates that would be stacked high, ready to be washed. Each child was put on a rota and we all took turns two at a time, one child would wash up and another would dry and put away! I hated it as this particular chore seemed never ending. However, we all had to take our turn.

Breeton House was a huge Victorian construction. From the outside it looked most impressive, and the entrance boasted a large wooden oak door with a giant black iron knocker on the front. I remember staring up at it in wonder the first time I saw it; I had asked myself what could be waiting for me on the other side. As the large door creaked open I found myself stood in the atrium of sorts. There was a large curved staircase leading off one way and there were double doors leading to the enormous living area. I looked to my right and there was a smaller single door leading to the sparse games room and library, the room had a very old pool table and lots of donated books, of which I read many.

I spent a lot of time curled up in a corner reading the many books and on one such occasion, I came across a biography about the life of Marilyn Monroe (aka Norma Jean). It was all in black and white with beautiful pictures of this sad woman I had never heard of. I read the book from cover to cover and was fascinated with this woman because she had spent her childhood in foster homes and had a bad childhood herself. I developed the utmost respect for her, wondering how she had done so well for herself, she had nothing, and yet in the end the whole world knew her name, this to me was truly inspiring.

From that day forth I made a promise to myself that I too would not become a statistic, that I would make something of myself no matter what. I just had to get through my childhood then my destiny would be in my own hands, no one else’s. My goals were set. I never told anyone. I kept them to myself as I did not want to hear that I would amount to nothing. I had heard that all my life.

I carried on reading my way through more biographies and I would lose myself in Enid Blyton's adventures! I fell in love with reading and soon I would read just about anything available, “Ann Frank’s Diary,” and so on. This was to be my saviour for many hard years that followed.

My existence was a futile one at times. I questioned life a lot and I questioned the finality and peace of death even more. No child should go through their childhood with such thoughts. However, sadly many do and this will always be so. I questioned God so much. I believed in him, but at the same time I wondered at a God that could stand by and do nothing when there was so much sadness and pain in the world. I was ten-years-old and just could not make sense of it at all.

During my second time at Breeton House I found it easier to settle in as I had all my siblings with me, which was enough security for all of us for the time being - the thought of us being separated just did not bear thinking about. Unfortunately, we were about to learn that our fate would soon be just that.

Jenny and Susie were in the nursery this one day; they had been dressed in pretty clothes like they were going somewhere. I asked Gill, a female member of staff, “Are Jenny and Susie going somewhere today?” Gill replied, “No Amelia they just have some visitors today, a very nice lady and gentleman.”

My heart sank as I knew instantly that the translation of this meant they were going to be fostered. All the young children in Breeton House were never there for very long, they were often given long term foster parents. We had seen a few of the children leave Breeton House this way. I always found it hard saying goodbye to children we had become fond of and close to, knowing that once they were gone, we would never see them again. I could not believe we had not been prepared for this - after all Jake and I were their siblings, we were family; did they think we would not notice? Of course we noticed we were not blind, however, we were children and our opinions and thoughts did not count for much during these harsh times.

Later that morning I waited in the large atrium and sat on an old reproduction monk seat; I wanted to see what was going on. I had also rallied Jake. We were so scared because we knew once we were separated we would never see each other again. This was a very frequent occurrence within the care system for siblings; they would often be split up from one another and that would be that.

The large oak doors opened. I was craning my neck to get a good view of the prospective foster parents; they seemed nice enough, quite normal really and all smiles. They were shown into the nursery where Jenny and Susie were playing together happily; where they remained for at least an hour. Once they had emerged from the nursery, I noticed the big smiles and hand shakes with the head of Breeton House, Gary. He showed them out of the door and made his way to the office.

Straight away Jake and I ran over to him, “
Gary, please tell us what is going on. Are they going to take Jenny and Susie home?” I asked.

“Amelia please come in and sit down, you too Jake,” urged
Gary. He proceeded to tell us that Mr. and Mrs. Bolton were soon to be Jenny and Susie’s new foster parents.

I had suspected as much, but hearing it out loud just broke my heart; we just could not take it all in. Gary went on to explain that Jenny and Susie were amongst the youngest residents at Breeton House and now that they were permanent wards
-of-the-state until they reached 16-years-old, the best route for them was to be fostered into a caring family home, to give them a fighting chance at a normal life.

Jenny and Susie seemed to take to the
Bolton’s, who visited them regularly for a while; this was standard procedure so they could all get used to each other before the big move. They often brought with them little gifts, which were gratefully received by the girls.

They never acknowledged Jake or me; it was as if we did not exist. I tried to throw a smile their way whenever I caught their eye, but they just looked away. Very odd behaviour, I thought. Why couldn’t they be kind enough to take us all? None of it made sense to me no matter how much it was explained to me. Jake and I hatched a plan; we would not stand by and allow these people to separate us all forever. We were going to do something about it.

Jake was ten-years-old and I was eleven-years-old by now and we had decided to fight for what we believed – that the four of us should not be separated. Jake and I hatched a plan and packed a bag – all we needed now was the darkness of the night. We had arranged to meet outside at the end of the driveway, after lights were out. I crept quietly down the long winding staircase so not to be heard. I found my way into the games room and left through the window and ran as fast as I could to the end of the driveway, hiding behind some evergreen bushes to await Jake’s arrival. I was so anxious and kept willing Jake to come running down the drive. I was getting worried now and I was beginning to wonder if he had been caught.

It seemed like I was waiting forever. Then I saw him, Jake running as fast as his little legs would carry him! We hugged each other tightly and smiled at each other very proudly as we had made our great escape. Destination was to be Head of Social Services in the centre of town. We knew the way as we had been there several times over the years for one reason or another, but this time we were going for a cause, this was Amelia and Jake’s cause. We were going to beg the Social Services not to separate us - that they can’t do that as we all belonged together. We knew all too well that once we were separated we would never see each other ever again. That was the norm, and we had heard so many similar stories, we just did not want to be one of those stories.