As I Close My Eyes (13 page)

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Authors: Sarah DiCello

BOOK: As I Close My Eyes
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Brad and Eric weren’t much help with the Ben situation, but what else did I expect? First of all, they were boys. Second, I wasn’t sure Eric cared too much about anything in his current state of contention, and Brad was simply a lost cause when it came to discussing anything remotely serious.

After a day on the boat filled with mindless conversation and the occasional dip in the water, I went home to find Mama sitting in the family room looking at an old baby album of Justin’s. Tears streamed down her face as I sat down gently next to her.


I can’t believe it’s going to be two years, Dani Bear,” she said as she brushed the tears away.

I would ignore the Dani Bear pet name for now. “I know, Mama. I know.”

I figured it would be the perfect time to bring up Ben since she was so upset. Maybe the news of me having a boyfriend, or whatever we were, would make her feel better and get her mind off her sadness.

After wiping tears from her face, I took a deep breath and began the big reveal. “So ... I have a little something to tell you, Mama.”


Shannon’s pregnant ... I knew it. That girl never ceases to amaze me,” she replied.


No, no, it’s nothing like that. I met someone.”


You did. Who? Where? Tell me everything.” She closed the album and shifted her body to face me.


His name is Ben. Shannon and I actually met him when we went up to The Falls.” I didn’t feel like getting into the fact that I drove there the weekend after just to follow him around so I could magically bump into him and fall in love. All she heard at this moment was that I had found someone.


Yeah, he owns this great bookstore up there with all of these ancient books from like the beginning of time. He’s very handsome and successful. I think he really likes me, Mama.”


Oh, Dani, I’m so happy for you.”


And he’s coming to dinner here on Saturday.” I wasn’t sure if Mama heard what I had just said because I said it as fast as I could so she wouldn’t start panicking.


Oh my God! Way to give me time to prepare. I have to clean the house and find a recipe and go food shopping.” Okay, she heard me loud and clear.


Mama, it’s fine. We had pizza on our first date. I’m sure he won’t care.”


Your first date? How many dates have you had, exactly?”


Well, three to be exact,” I said with a huge smile. “I came to his bookstore for the first date and he ran across the street and got us a pizza. Mama, his bookstore is like something you’d see walking on cobblestone streets somewhere in England. And he studied in England. Anyway ... our second date was breakfast at this little café right outside of Tallulah and our third was just yesterday.” I knew that was going to spark major curiosity on Mama’s part.


Yesterday. How come you didn’t tell me before now, Danielle?”


It all seemed too good to be true. I wasn’t sure it was going to last past our first date, let alone our third.” I realized I was practically jumping out of my seat with excitement as I told her. “He’s from New York City originally, but now lives in Tallulah and he’s way out of my league, Mama.”


No one is out of my Dani Bear’s league.”
             

There it was again. I truly hoped she didn’t call me that in front of Ben.


I just never thought someone like him would be interested in someone like me.”


Dani, you have never shown the confidence in yourself that I think you should. Give yourself some credit for once. Put on a little blush and show off this face,” she said as she grabbed my cheeks on both sides like Aunt Elsie used to do when I was three years old. “So, how old is this Ben? I mean, he already owns a bookstore, has studied in England. Please tell me he’s under forty.”


By a long shot, Mama. He’s twenty-six.”


Well, twenty-six is a little scary, but I think I’m okay with it as long as Saturday goes well.”
             


I’m sure it will, Mama. You and Bill are going to love him.”


We’re going to love who?” Bill asked as he walked down the hallway into the family room. He was wiping black grease from his hands, which made me think he was changing the oil on my car.


Oh Bill, Dani met someone. His name is Ben. I’ll tell you all about him later, but right now, I’m taking my beautiful daughter out for some new clothes.”


Wow! Thanks, Mama.” I definitely didn’t expect this reaction, but I’d take it.

We headed to this quaint little outdoor shopping center set at the base of the mountains. Cobblestone paths led shoppers from the parking lot through the sidewalks along big brand-name stores like L.L. Bean, Ann Taylor, and Williams Sonoma. Green awnings hung over every storefront and large dogwood trees lined the center, creating a dividing line where husbands rested on park benches while their wives went shopping.
             

We spent two hours buying new jeans, cute dresses, colorful t-shirts, and of course, new shoes. Mama never liked me in flip-flops and said I wore them all the time, which was true, but they were comfortable and went with everything. She bought me the most adorable pink high-heeled sandals at Nine West to go with a dress she found in a unique store called Chloe’s. The dress had a red band that went around my chest with a pink, blue, and green skirt that poofed out in a floral explosion of roses and dainty berries.

I was glad we spent this time together so she could get her mind off Justin. My timing was perfect.

We came home later that afternoon with all of our treasures and pulled them out of their protective packages wrapped in tissue paper so we could admire them one last time before we sheltered them in our small closets. I came down the stairs in my pajamas, grabbed some tea and cuddled up on the couch for another movie night with Mama and Bill.

 

*  *  *

 

I found myself sitting on a stone bench in the backyard of what looked like Robert’s house, staring at a large vegetable garden.

I wasn’t sure how many days had passed since the kiss with Robert, but the sun had just started peeking over the horizon, so I knew it was early. Robert walked out of the house with two cups of coffee and some biscuits filled with butter.


Wonderful morning isn’t it, darling?” he asked me.


Yes, it’s perfect,” I replied, trying to put the pieces of our time together. “Why are you up so early?”


You know I can’t sleep past dawn. I have that Fairfield case to go over and I can’t get it out of my mind.”
             


Oh, I’m terribly sorry.” Terribly sorry
-
did I really just say that?


What do you want to do today? I think the cleanup from the fire is almost over. We should do something by ourselves and enjoy each other’s company. In fact, the Fairfield case can wait ‘til Monday.”


I don’t know. Why don’t you decide?” I couldn’t even place where I was, so I knew I’d end up sounding like an idiot if I tried to make something up.


How about we go for a walk and head to the bakery for some coffee?” Robert said.


That sounds lovely, darling.”

We got ourselves ready for the stroll to the bakery - wherever that was.


You sure you’re up for this?” Robert asked.


Absolutely. Why wouldn’t I be?” He was being overly cautious with me. I wasn’t sure if I overreacted. Maybe this was how the men of the 1800s treated their girlfriends, or whatever I was to him.

He shook off my question as we passed by homes that were still being rebuilt after the fire. Magnificent color remained on the edges of a few of the houses the fire didn’t touch. Some were completely destroyed, while others were left with distinct black trails where the flames had lightly grazed. Beyond the charred remains of the ruined houses, the ocean glimmered in the early morning sunshine.


Shall we stop for a moment?” Robert asked.


We most certainly should. The view is stunning from here,” I replied.

We walked over to a small bench seated at the edge of the path, right before the dirt hit the sand.


I count our blessings that everyone we love was not hurt in the fire,” Robert began. “I don’t know what I would do if I lost you, Caroline.” Robert put his arm around me and gave me a light squeeze as we stared out into the ocean.


You shall never lose me. We have too much life left in us and we’ve only just begun our journey together,” I replied.


Do you think Rebecca and your mother are happy staying with us?”


I believe so. They haven’t led me to think otherwise. You are so kind to open your home to us.”


Don’t you mean our home, darling?”


Why, yes. That’s what I meant,” I said with uncertainty.


Your family is welcome to stay for as long as they need. It will be a while before their house is fit to live in.”


I’m sure you’re right,” I replied. “Let’s head to breakfast. I’m just famished.”

We continued on to a little bakery located only a block from the ocean. It was chilly, but the sun took the cold out of the air.

Robert was the perfect gentleman. Townspeople who came in for their morning scones all said hello to us as we sat at a little table near a large window. Obviously everyone knew us as a couple. As I took a sip of my coffee, a tall gentleman with a top hat came into the restaurant and saw us. “Hello Mr. and Mrs. Marcum,” he said.

Mr. and Mrs. Marcum? I looked around to see if anyone was sitting at the table behind us. Robert said hello back and that’s when I saw it - the ring on my hand.

 

 

Chapter 12

 

The days leading up to Saturday were filled with silence. I quietly tried to wrap my head around being married to Robert. Every lonely moment I had left me questioning the conversations we’d had and the obvious fact that I had never noticed the ring on my own hand. I also wondered why I didn’t sleep in Robert’s bed the night I passed out on Mrs. Bigsley’s couch? Maybe he just thought I needed to keep my sister company. Did couples in the 1800s not sleep in the same bed? It might have been seen as rude since my mother and sister were in his
-
I mean our
-
house. I also didn’t see a ring on his finger. I’d really have to pay attention to Robert’s hands the next time I dreamt about him. I felt as though each time I transported to the quaint beach town, I left a piece of Danielle behind in present-day Georgia. I was losing bits and pieces of myself through the portals of time travel.

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