Begin Again (2 page)

Getting out of his truck
, he walked over to his brother and sat down. “What’s up?”

He and Dustin were twins, only fraternal
, but they looked like they could be identical. Dustin was his best friend and had been their whole lives. Since Dustin became a father, he was all about dishing out advice that wasn’t asked for, but Dylan would humor him.

“Nothing
. My house has been invaded by wedding shit today, so I thought I’d come see if you wanted to have breakfast before we head to the office. You with Cassie last night?” Dustin knew about their arrangement. He didn’t get it or why, but it wasn’t really his business, so Dylan didn’t care.

“
Yep. That all right with you?”

“Don’t be an ass.
I just don’t see why you don’t try dating; hell, date Cassie. You guys are together all of the time, so you might as well make it official.”

“I don’t have time to date and Cassie and I tried dating.
We’re better off as friends who just like to fuck each other. We both agreed that if either of us met someone we’d break it off, but I see it happening to her long before it happens to me, which is perfect.”

Dustin shook his head
with what looked like disbelief. The guy was all about love and happily ever after’s these days. Of course that’s because Saturday Dustin was marrying the love of his life and the mother of their daughter. Dylan was happy for him and loved Stacy to death, and little Violet, their one-year-old was the most gorgeous little girl next to his sister Bellamy’s little girl, Carrington.

Dylan found it comical that Dustin and Luke both had daughters.
It certainly served his former-slut brother right. The guy was already threatening to start buying guns to have on hand when boys started sniffing around Violet. Their mom said it was karma. They were getting what was coming to them.

“Okay, forget I mentioned it.
Go shower and then we’ll grab some breakfast. Don’t forget that we have final fittings for the tuxes tomorrow afternoon, too.”

Dylan nodded and went inside to shower.

After breakfast Dylan rode with his brother to their offices. Together with Luke, the three men ran the construction company that their fathers’ started, as both men retired last year. Dylan didn’t have the college degree like his brother or Luke, so he ran and managed the crews on the sites. He wasn’t above getting his hands dirty with the rest of his men and had learned a lot over the past year.

He still sometimes wondered if he’d made a mistake getting out of the Marine
Corp when he did, because if he would’ve stayed in, then in ten or so years he could’ve retired. There was no point thinking about that now. He was happy with where he was at in his life. When he’d first come home two years ago he’d been in bad shape. Just the mental drain of being deployed, and then there was
her
; he didn’t even say her name anymore because it still caused him to feel empty and alone. In a moment of weakness, Dylan had told Cassie about
her
.
She was such a cool woman that she offered to try and help find her, but Dylan had turned her down.

Dylan fucked up that whole situation
. Never being able to find her was his punishment for lying to her about his name and leaving without saying goodbye. He’d been dealing with it ever since.

“Dylan?”
His brother was snapping his fingers in front of his face. “Where’d you go?”

“Nowhere
. Just thinking.” Dylan avoided his brother’s questioning gaze.

Dustin wasn’t stupid
; he probably knew exactly where Dylan’s head was at. He knew all about
her
, but no more thoughts of that.

He left his brother staring after him and went inside to his office, which was the size of a broom closet, but at least he didn’t spend a lot of time there.
Usually at the start of a job he stayed behind to make sure the permits were good and everything else was set up: equipment, supplies and the licenses of his workers were all up to date. His phone buzzed on his desk. Picking it up, he saw it was a text from Cassie.

Cassie: I forgot that you asked, but I would love to come to the wedding with you on Saturday.

Well, shit, he forgot he asked her, but hell—at least there would be the promise of sex afterwards.

Dylan: Cool, you’ll probably have to drive separately since I’m the best man and will be helping Dustin with shit all day. Is that cool?

Cassie: Yeah, that’s fine. C you sometime this week?

Dylan: ???? Maybe, I’ll call u.

Cassie: K. by
e


He tossed his phone back on the desk and finished up what paperwork he needed to. Then it was time to head out to Hilton Head for the day.

It was after eight by the time Dylan got home and he was exhausted.
Showering quick and then grabbing a beer, he went into the living room and booted up his computer. He took a few pulls off his beer as he started checking his e-mail. Most was junk, but he got to an e-mail from one of his good friends from the Marines. It looked like Chris’s wife Betsy had just given birth to their second child: a girl. Dylan was happy for them and would have to make sure he sent them a gift. He clicked through the pictures of the little family and felt a sense of longing as he stared at the happy couple.

He shook his head and drained his beer.
Who was he kidding; he didn’t want that, he didn’t want what his parents had, his baby sister and now his brother. At least that’s what he was going to keep telling himself. Maybe he and Cassie could talk after all of the wedding stuff was over and see if they were still on the same page.

Throwing away his empty beer bottle
, he locked up the house and got into bed. He stared up at the ceiling for a long time wondering where all of these crazy thoughts were coming from. Dylan was glad when he felt sleep start to take him under. He needed to get out of his own head.

Chapter Two

By Friday, Journey was happy that the kids had settled into a pretty good routine. Nan was still coming over in the mornings to help get the kids ready, but drop-offs were going well. Joey was no longer crying when she went to leave and seemed to be thriving already with the interaction between him and the other children. Mia told Journey the night before when she picked him up that he had all of the girls fawning all over him.

Abby loved her teacher and was even making friends.
Journey was enjoying her classes. Granted, it was only the first week of school, but most of the kids seemed eager to learn. Even though a lot of them had, they were going to read
To Kill a Mockingbird
. She had lots of activities planned as they read it. That book had always been a favorite of hers.

After her last class cleared out
, she started packing up her stuff to take home for the weekend. She just finished when there was a knock at her door. Smiling, she watched Zach enter her room with his own bag over his shoulder. He was so handsome with his dark blond hair-perfectly tousled, his cornflower blue eyes, and the two matching dimples when he smiled at her.

She kissed him quickly and grabbed her things.
They were careful not to touch on school grounds because Zach didn’t want any problems for Journey if someone found out about them.

“How was your day?
I feel like I’ve hardly seen you,” he said as they walked through the halls to staff parking.

“It was good.
I’m glad to have the first week done. Next week we’re going to start reading
To Kill a Mockingbird
and I’ve got lots of stuff planned while we do. How was yours?”

“You do realize most of them have probably read it, right?
My week was good, just the same old same old. “

“Oh
, I’m sure they have, but it’s a great book. I can’t wait to read it again.” When they reached her car she threw her bag in the trunk. Zach reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

“I’ve missed you this week.
What would you say to pizza tonight? I could grab it on my way over. Abby only eats cheese, right?”

That’s why she liked Zach
. He was a super sweet guy and the fact that he was gorgeous didn’t hurt, either. They were taking things slow. They’d kissed and touched, but she’d been too nervous to go any further because of the kids. He was so great with them. She waited a month before she introduced him to either one of them and they both liked him immediately. Abby always talked his ear off, but he was patient and listened to everything she had to say. Joey loved to use him as his personal jungle gym. Zach never minded and would laugh and play along.

She told him about Abby and the drama with her brother. He kn
ew that Joey’s dad was MIA, and when she gave Zach his name, he unfortunately had never heard of him. Tomorrow night she was going to a wedding reception for one of his good friends and she was going to finally meet some of the people she’d heard stories about.

“Pizza sounds great, and
yes, she only eats cheese. She’ll be excited to see you and tell you all about her first week of Kindergarten.” Journey loved that he was sincere in his affection towards her kids. It couldn’t be easy being involved with someone with two small kids. It certainly wasn’t easy to have a social life with them, but they were her world.

“Okay, I’ll see you in about an hour.” Zach opened and held the door for her.

She wanted to kiss him, but there were people all around.
Journey was just going to have to wait until tonight. Maybe after the reception tomorrow night she could ask him to stay over.

“Bye
, Zach.” He shut her door and she watched in her rearview mirror as he walked over to his car.

Journey was just brushing out her hair when the doorbell rang.
When she got home, she changed into knit shorts, a t-shirt, and flip flops. She pulled her hair up into a ponytail and scooped Joey up off the floor, going out to answer the door. She smiled as she passed Abby, who had fallen asleep watching some weird cartoon with a talking snake.

Opening the door
, she smiled wide as Zach greeted her with a quick kiss on the lips. She stepped back so he could walk in. He was carrying a large pizza box and a six-pack of beer. He set it on the kitchen counter then he grabbed Joey out of her arms.

“What’s up
, little dude? Do you have all the girls at daycare swooning over you?” Joey started clapping and nodding his head.

“Swoon?
How do you even know what that means? You’re a guy.”

“What
, us manly men can’t use the word swoon? Come on, Joey, let’s get Mommy.” Zach held Joey out as they came at Journey. She played along, pretending to cower against the pantry door. Joey growled at her with the ever present drool running down his chin. She grabbed him from Zach, sliding down to the floor as her little man grasped her face, squealing.

Zach reache
d down with his hand to help her stand up. She deposited Joey in his high chair with some cut up pears. As Zach got plates down, she went to wake up Abby. She didn’t hide her excitement at seeing Zach. While they ate, Abby told them all about her teacher and the friends she’d made already.

“Aunt JoJo
, can Zach sleep over? You can make him chocolate chip pannycakes for breakfast.” She didn’t notice both adults freezing. Journey could feel her cheeks heat up in embarrassment.

“Well
, uh, we’ll see about th-that.” She didn’t know what else to say.

Abby continued to chatter away with Joey while they ate their pizza.
After Abby’s question, things felt awkward with Zach. Journey didn’t know how to do the whole dating thing, especially with kids. Nan agreed to keep the kids at her place tomorrow night, so she could bring Zach home if she wanted to, and she really did. She was worried, though. He just got a taste of the inappropriate questions that kids ask sometimes and now maybe he was gonna realize that she wasn’t worth the effort.

After dinner she wiped both kids down and set them up in the living room while she and Zach cleaned up the kitchen.
She knew she was being quiet, but she wasn’t sure if he was upset about Abby’s innocent question. In all honesty, she’d love to have him spend the night. Even if he just held her, it’d be better than sleeping alone. The more time he spent with them she figured he probably wanted sex, but he hadn’t said anything. Journey had heard some of the other teachers say that he was a bit of a man-hoe.

She just hoped that he wasn’t sleeping with other
women while they were together. Maybe it was time to have a talk about it. Journey was placing the pizza in the refrigerator when she felt his arms wrap around her waist. Standing tall, she turned in his arms, wrapping her arms around his waist.

“I’m sorry if Abby put you on the spot.
I know that wasn’t her intention and we haven’t really talked about where this is or isn’t going.” He silenced her with his lips and his tongue. Zach could definitely kiss. He backed her to the counter as his lips made their way down her jaw. She gripped his shirt, holding on to him. They should really stop before Abby caught them, but she just couldn’t.

“Mama!
Mamamam!” Zach froze then looked down and started laughing. Joey had walked into the kitchen and was pulling on his pant leg, trying to get to Journey. Zach picked Joey up and handed him to her, kissing her lips one more time.

This was why she’d been single so long.
Her life was utter chaos. She loved it, but how could any guy find her desirable when she lived in a zoo? She was just going to have to put on her big girl panties and just ask him.

“Why do you want me, Zach?” He looked at her in confusion
. “Seriously, I’m twenty-three—almost twenty-four, with two kids. My life is crazy. Don’t get me wrong, I love my life, but it can be so hectic sometimes. You’re good-looking, nice, and fun to be around; I’m sure the ladies are knocking down your door. Why me?”

Journey wanted to run and hide. She should’ve kept her mouth shut
, because now she sounded crazy and whiny.

“Are you kidding me?”
She looked up as Zach spoke. “So your life’s a little crazy right now; so what? Sweetheart, you’re beautiful, sweet, funny and, from what I’ve seen, a wonderful mother. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to be. So we’re taking things slow—I was the one who suggested it. I want to see where this goes, and I hope you do to.”

Wow
. She wasn’t expecting that, but that right there was why she liked him so much.

“I do, Zach.”

“Good. Now stop worrying that I’m going to run screaming from your house, because you know what I don’t scare easily.”

With Joey in her arms
, they made their way back into the living room to watch a movie with Abby and Journey did it with a smile on her face.

***

Dylan was straightening his tie in the bathroom. It was hard to believe that in just a few hours his brother was going to be married. He was so happy for Dustin. He loved Stacy and couldn’t imagine a more perfect wife for his brother. Dylan and Stacy had become closer after the ordeal two years ago involving her ex-boyfriend. He still would never forget finding her under that motherfucker’s dead body. He thought for sure that she’d been dead. Mark had beaten her so badly that she was barely recognizable. The one and only good thing that came from that whole situation was his niece, Violet.

That fucker tried to trap Stacy and had sabotaged all of the condoms she had, but it was his brother who had used them
, and Stacy had gotten pregnant because of it. She still saw a therapist to this day—hell, afterwards he even started talking to one. Things were better now for the whole family.

Last night Luke and Dustin came over after the rehearsal dinner to drink some beers and play cards.
Stacy was staying at her mom’s with Violet and he knew his brother didn’t want to stay home without his girls.

Luke brought the cigars.
They sat on the back deck until they killed the eighteen pack that Dylan had bought, and smoked every last cigar. By the time midnight rolled around, Luke decided to spend the night, too. He was too buzzed to drive and didn’t want Bellamy to have to wake Carrington up to come get him. That was a pairing that he hadn’t seen coming, and he really didn’t handle it well at first. Bellamy was his baby sister and Luke was he and Dustin’s best friend. They were happy, and Luke treated her and Carrington like two queens, so Dylan wasn’t going to complain.

He finished with his tie, grabbed the tux jacket and met his brother out in the living room. “All right
, bro, let’s head to Mom and Dad’s, then get you married.” Dylan clapped in on the shoulder and they headed out.

The ceremony was short and sweet. Stacy looked absolutely gorgeous in
an off-white, off the shoulder dress that showed off her curves. Damn, his brother was a lucky man. When Stacy’s dad walked her down the aisle, he was carrying Violet, who was in a little dress that looked similar to her momma’s. The little girl looked exactly like Dustin and Dylan, but with her momma’s olive complexion. She was going to be a knockout when she got older. He’d never forget the look on his brother’s face when he saw Stacy and Violet coming down the aisle. If he hadn’t known better he would’ve swore his brother had tears in his eyes.

Stacy didn’t even try to hide the fact that she was crying as she walked towards
Dustin. Sniffles could be heard all around until Violet decided everyone was too serious and started saying “Da da” as loud as she could; that girl had a set of lungs on her. The best was she was clapping her hands and bouncing in her grandpa’s arms while she did it. A person would have to be dead not to laugh at her antics.

After the ceremony
, while the guests headed to the reception hall, the wedding party and family stuck around for tons of pictures. By the time they were done, he was tired of smiling so damn much. Cassie hung around during pictures. She looked beautiful. Her raven hair was pulled back at the sides, hanging just past her shoulders. Her dress was royal blue and looked great against her porcelain skin. It was borderline-too skimpy for a wedding, but on her willowy frame it looked hot. Of course she had to wear a pair of black fuck me heels that made her almost as tall as Dylan’s six foot three frame.

When he looked at her
, he tried to imagine making her his wife and mother of his children, but for the life of him he couldn’t do it. She said she didn’t want that with him, but sometimes he wondered if she said it just because he said he didn’t. Dylan went and sat with her while the photographer took shots of just the bride and groom.

“Why didn’t you head on over to the reception? I didn’t realize this was going to take forever.”

“That’s okay, I don’t mind waiting. When my sister got married, I swear my face was going to fall off from smiling so much. They look great together and their little girl is such a little doll.” She smiled wistfully at Dustin and Stacy.