Broken Survivor (17 page)

“Thanks.” She turned her head to look at him with a coy smile. “It’s so beautiful, isn’t it?” The sky was dark and clear with a few stars and a big, bright full moon dominating the scenery.

“I agree, but I much prefer the view down here.” He squeezed her closer and bent to whisper, “You’re beautiful,” before he lifted her chin with his finger to kiss her. His lips touched hers for a quick taste once and then twice more before he sucked on her bottom lip and pulled back.

“It’s my first free night.” She turned around to face him and looped her arms around his neck. “What are your plans for me?” She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively and squealed with laughter as he threw her over his shoulder and carried her over the threshold. He bypassed his family without a word to get to his bedroom as quick as possible.

“How about a little of this?” he asked, and she chuckled when he tossed her on his bed and pounced.

He loved her, held her, and kept her close to him the entire night. Once sated, she was in his arms as they fell asleep until the very next day when they awoke for a second round. Their time together that night granted her a few more much-needed positive moments for her memory bank, and for his too.

***

Holly

“No way, this is not happening again. For Christ’s sakes, Clay, enough already!”

“I’m sorry, but what do you expect? There was so much leg work, and it wasn’t worth the shit pay they offered,” he grumbled.

“Well, man up and figure out what the hell you want to do. Shit pay is better than no pay at all, and I’m tired of doing it all myself. I’ve got two girls to take care of. I didn’t sign up for a third child,” Emma huffed. From her seat on the stairs, Holly watched her mother pace in the living room. She’d been on her way down for a drink before bed when she heard them arguing and decided to wait it out instead of being dragged in.

“This is, what, like job number five in the last six months?” Emma said.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean? It’s not like I’ve been counting.” He yelled this time instead of sounding like a stubborn man-child. “I just need to find something that I like, and I’m not sure what I want to do yet.”

Holly rolled her eyes and chewed on her fingernail as the fight continued.

“It means what I said. My God, we’ve been together for over a year, and I’m tired of the excuses. Get a fucking job. It’s not that hard to do!” her mother screamed back. “I’m not sure I can do this with you anymore.”

“What the fuck?” he growled and stood face-to-face with her. “Is that an ultimatum? Because I don’t do that shit. I’ll get a job when I get a fuckin’ job, okay?”

“That’s not good enough.” Her mother sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose as if deflated all of a sudden. “I’m tired, Clay, and I need you to help me out here. We’re arguing constantly, and I hate it. I can’t live like this. I’ll give you a couple more months to get it together, but that’s it, bucko. This is your last chance. You hear what I’m saying? The sooner the better. I think I’ve been patient enough.”

“Fine,” he growled and stomped from the room, slamming the door on his way out of the house.

Holly startled at the sound of the bang—loud noises made her jumpy—and then made her way to the living room, drink temporarily forgotten. “Are you all right?”

“Yeah.” Emma sighed. “I’ll get there.”

She sat on the couch, and her shoulders slumped when Holly joined her to give her a hug. “Okay.”

What else was there really to say? Holly was at a loss for words. She was old enough to know what was going on, but young enough to know better than to add anything to the adult drama. She didn’t need to hear it. It wasn’t her place. Her mother always found a way and took care of them well, so she assumed it would all work out in the end.

Shortly afterward, Holly was lying on the couch with her head in Emma’s lap, silently watching TV while her mother played with her hair before everything faded to black as she fell asleep
.
Safe, comfortable, and content.

Holly’s dream then shifted from a memory into another nightmare.

Sharp nails scrapped her scalp, a painful burn. A wet drop of blood slid down the side of her face over her cheek, and her eyes opened wide as she cried out. Her hair was pulled back violently, and her mother was no longer there. In her place was Clay, only he looked like a scary, demented clown. White face, red round nose, and multicolored hair sticking out at all angles. Saliva dripped from his sharp, yellow teeth onto her face, and he pinned her to the sofa with the longest fingernails she’d ever seen. He laughed while he forced her to look at him and pulled her hair some more in his tight hold.

“Please.” Her chin tilted upward, her body trembled, and she began to cry.

“I love it when they beg,” he hissed, and her face scrunched with a little disgust and a whole lot of fright. “You were a bad girl, Holly, and Mom had to go. My only mistake was leaving you!”

His talons grew and sharpened like knives, and she screamed in terror when he grabbed her and pierced them through her throat. The last thing she remembered was the out-of-body experience. Her face was locked in a shocked, lifeless expression as a pool of blood flowed slowly out of her body and ran down Bozo freak’s legs onto the floor.

Drenched with sweat, Holly thrashed and screamed herself awake. She sat up and gasped for air, having a hard time bringing the oxygen into her lungs.
Why?
She’d been plagued
with nightmares for years, and they just kept getting weirder.
What did it all mean?
And, more importantly, how could she make them go away?

She was a certifiable freak.

“You okay, babe?” Zander sat up to rub her back, and she hid her face inside her hands.

“I-it was just a dream,” she whispered and tried desperately to control her tremors. She hated when he saw her like this.

“It must have been one hell of one. You’re shaking like a leaf.” He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tightly to his body. “It’s not real. It’s okay.” He kissed the top of her head and rubbed her back until she was able to breathe normally and loosen up. “You want to talk about it?”

“Uh-uh.” She shook her head and looked into his face for the first time since waking him up. “I’ll be okay. Just hold me, please.”

“Always.” He kissed her again, and she feigned sleep until she heard his snores. When he was in deep, she finally sighed and lay there in his arms, watching how peaceful he looked while he dreamed. Her peace was over for the night, and she squeezed him tighter, willing her heartbeat to slow down. She’d made some leeway from her long journey to escape hell, but there was a long road ahead of her.

Chapter Fourteen

Summer of 1999

Holly moaned with pleasure the minute her shoes hit the floor. After a long day on her feet at work, they were killing her. She walked through the hallway, stripping along the way. First her jacket, then her shirt and pants. She pulled on one of Zander’s tees he’d left behind from his last sleepover because it was comfortable, but mostly because she missed him.

It had been about a week since she’d last seen him, and the apartment was quiet and lonely lately. They’d talked every night, but it wasn’t the same. Either their work schedules clashed, he was too tired, or they had other plans already with their own friends.

“Hey, honey, what are you up to?” she said and smiled the minute he answered the phone. She got comfortable on her sectional, resting the phone on her shoulder and tucking her legs behind her on the next cushion.

“I just walked in a couple minutes ago. It was hot as fuck out today, and I’m drained.” Zander worked in landscaping and construction, which meant he was outside all the time. “How about you? Have a good day at work?”

“Boring, but tolerable, I guess. My feet are killing me, though. I think I might need to buy another pair of shoes.” Holly smiled when he softly chuckled.

“Wear flats. That might help a bit.”

“I’ll take that into consideration.” She chewed on her bottom lip and then sighed. “I wish I would have called a rain check on tonight with the girls, and if it wasn’t Tamara’s birthday I totally would. I miss you.”

“I miss you too. Try to have fun, Hol. I’ll be seeing you soon.”

“Care to be here when I get back?” It was wishful thinking, but hey, he had a key and a girl could always try.

“I don’t expect you’ll be home until after closing time, and I’ve got some plans with the boys tonight too. I’m all yours for most of the day tomorrow, I swear it. We’ve got to make up for some lost time.” He ended that with a growl of need and she shivered.

“Mmm, I can’t wait.”

“Me neither, trust me,” he rumbled. “Listen, I’m about to jump in the shower to get the dirt and sweat off. I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?”

“As soon as you can, I hope.” Her heartbeat fluttered, and she began to look forward to the next day with him. “I wish I was there to help wash your back.”

“Tease,” Zander growled.

“Yeah, but only for you.” She giggled. “Have fun tonight.”

“You too. See you later, babe.”

“Promises, promises.” She smirked. “Until tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow for sure.”
Click.

***

The girls were looking good, if she had to say so herself. Chrystal, Tamara, Nadia, Angel, and she went the whole nine yards to get ready for their girls’ night. Holly kept her hair down, like Zander liked it. She’d teased it a little and rolled it with a round brush to add volume to her layers. She used a hint of makeup to accentuate her big green eyes, a bit of eyeliner and mascara, some rouge, and some lip gloss to make her full, pouty lips look moist and succulent. She wore a pair of skinny jeans and an old Metallica tank that made her boobs look great and finished off the ensemble with a pair of black flats because her feet were still too sore for anything else.
Freakin’ blisters.

The birthday girl had her hair in a ponytail with her long blonde locks flowing from the elastic and wore a pair of acid-wash shorts, a tee, and comfy shoes. Her sister dressed very similar to Holly in a tee and jeans but with shoes that had a bit of a heel. Her blue eyes were as clear as the ocean, and they stood out exceptionally against dark hair almost the same shade as Holly’s. Nadia and Angel both wore sexy summer dresses with strappy shoes, and their long, smooth bare legs looked great with sandals.

They’d met at Tamara’s for a couple of drinks while they all got ready, giggling and shooting the shit, mostly to vent. The birthday girl was having trouble in paradise with her beau and was in real need of some good times. That was the plan and Holly was sure feeling it. She hadn’t had an alcoholic beverage in nearly two years. After leaving Lauren’s she’d really cleaned up her act, and part of that was thanks to her man. The other two reasons were the promise to her mother and the fact that Holly didn’t like the person she was becoming.
Ancient history now…

The dark night disappeared once they’d stepped out of the cab and rushed into the bar. Inside the quiet of the evening gave way to the thumping of loud music through the speaker system and cheers from the ladies all around them. Pink, blue, and yellow strobe lights shone on the dance floor. The bar itself was packed with patrons impatiently waiting for their turn while the two cute bartenders tried their best to get everyone’s thirst quenched.

“It’s a little weird being here. Don’t you think?” Holly had to raise her voice and speak into her sister’s ear to be heard.

“A little, but at least you know it’ll be a good time,” Chrystal hollered back. “Oh look, there are our reserved seats.”

“They take reservations?” Holly was shocked.

“Oh yeah.” Tamara smirked. “You can call ahead to book for birthdays and such. We’ve got the best seats in the house over there.”

“Uh-huh, perverts’ row.” Nadia’s grin widened, and she grabbed Holly’s hand to pull her forward.

“What’s up?” Tamara eyed her as if she could sense there was something wrong, and the truth was that Holly couldn’t get over the weird feeling that had suddenly come over her. Not that she’d say anything to ruin the vibe for them all.

“Nothing, just think I’m in serious need of a drink right now, that’s all.”

“I agree with the drinks. We all could use one. What’s freaking Hol out is the fact that Hot Tamales is the last place Mom had a good time. The night she died, your mother and mine were here celebrating their birthdays before it all went down,” Chrystal explained.

“Way to be a buzzkill, Chrys.” Holly stuck out her tongue and laughed to lighten the mood. “This first round is on me, and you, cousin, are getting a double for your special day.” Before anyone could say anything else, she got up and headed toward the bar, praying that when she got back they’d be talking about something else, like the stripper shaking his stuff in front of them and not the serious shit. Tonight was definitely not a night to get all mellow and start crying over her beer about her mother issues, damn it. She shivered and tried to make herself think of something else, anything else.

Let the good times roll.

***

Okay, she was drunk. The good kind of drunk. Feeling good and having a really good time. The girls had danced, laughed, enjoyed the view above them on stage, and even got a couple lap dances for the birthday girl. These men were F-I-N-E with a capital
F
. Big muscles and tight little asses shaking it. Bona fide eye-candy hotness.
Good Lord, is it getting warm in here?
She fanned herself for a minute and laughed at the expression on her girls’ faces. Practically drooling, they all had their eyes on the prize, aka
the naked, ripped dude front and center. Holly shook her head to clear it a little and took another sip of her beer.

Then it came, the big surprise.

The long-time tradition at Hot Tamales for any bachelorette or birthday girl in attendance was to get a little something special from the guys, and they’d been waiting for it. When Holly went to the bar for their first round of drinks, Chrystal had met with the manager to let her know what to expect and in turn she told all of the girls, with the exception of Tamara. That was going to be a huge surprise. Now they were on round four of drinks from Angel and the time had come.

“Geeeetttt ready all, because we have somethin’ special planned for a couple extra-special ladies up in here,” the DJ announced. “Guys, you ready?” He looked around the room and nodded to the background beat. “Then go on and get your sexy thangs.”

The room erupted in cheers and whistles as men dressed in uniformed costumes collected everyone they needed, her cousin included. Chrystal had her fingers between her lips to let loose another ear-piercing whistle, and the rest of them laughed at Tamara’s eager face.

A biker, an officer, an Indian, a cowboy, and a construction worker surrounded the women on stage and began to dance to “YMCA.” Women had their hands in the air doing the letters and shaking their booties, whether in their seats or on the dance floor. The men did pelvic thrusts to the first
buh, buh, buh, buh
beat and turned around to give the audience a view as well. They marched, shook their asses, kicked out one, two, three, and then the unthinkable happened, much to Holly’s surprise—and humiliation.

Everything seemed to happen in slow motion, and it was just her luck that the construction worker, of all people, had decided to stand right in front of her. His ass was toward some other chick on stage, so he faced Holly. Her eyes widened as she saw what was about to happen, and she tried to get out of the way but failed. On the third kick out in his dance routine, his steel-toed boot flew right off his foot into the air and headed straight for her. Her reflexes must have been way off because it hit her smack-dab in the middle of her forehead, and she lost her balance on her stool. One minute she was enjoying herself, and the next her tush was on the floor and her head hurt like a bitch.

“Shit, Hol, are you okay?” Chrystal knelt in front of her while everyone else in the whole damn bar stared.

“No!”
Fuck me.
“What the hell, man?” Holly growled. Shock turned into embarrassment, and then it turned into anger while her girls helped her up.

Party over!

“Hey, sorry about that.” The stripper approached with Tamara and tried to be all cute, but Holly wasn’t buying it.

“You should be.” She scowled and rubbed her forehead with a wince.

“Hey, um I think it’s about time we call it a night.” Tamara looked at her with pity and gave the dude a sympathetic look before she went to gather her things as Holly said, “Yeah.”

“Can I have my boot?” The stripper smiled coyly and held out a hand as his buddies rubbed her shoulder on their way past and another came by to give her some ice in a bag for her head.

“Nope.” She gripped it tighter. “There is a lesson to be learned here. I need to learn never to sit in perverts’ row again, and you, my man, need to learn to tie your damn laces.” She turned without another word, grabbed her purse, and left with as much dignity as she could muster. Thank God she was drunk, because come morning she was going to be sore and would probably go back to feeling humiliated as soon as she thought about it. The goose egg was already starting, and she groaned the moment the ice touched her head.

The boot—well, that ended up in the dumpster behind the bar.

Good riddance.

***

Someone was banging at the door and it woke her up.

What the…?
She cautiously looked through the peephole in the door before opening it to a familiar face.

“Hey, baby.”

“Shhh, Zander.” Holly pulled him inside and looked around the building’s hallway before she went back in the apartment. “What are you doing here?”

“I thought I was invited.” He smirked and pulled her flush against him. “I missed you, and I decided I didn’t want to wait until morning.”

Woah!
She resisted taking a step back. He reeked of alcohol. “Are you drunk?” She chuckled. He was a cute drunk on the rare occasion he got that way. Very affectionate, easygoing, and talkative.

“Maybe a little bit.” He lifted his hand, and his thumb and index finger parted to indicate just how little. “How about you, did you have a good time?”

“Yes and no.” Before she could tell him any more about her interesting girls’ night and its abrupt ending, he leaned forward to give her a quick kiss, and she winced when he rested his forehead against hers.

“What the hell?” Zander stepped back and flicked the light switch on the wall to get a better look at what was hurting her.

“Funny thing—” Her heart melted a little at the look of pure concern on his handsome face. “Okay, maybe not.” She pulled him with her to the couch and sat beside him. “We went to Hot Tamales tonight, and we had a pretty good time for the most part. A couple hours in, Tamara got brought to the stage for her birthday with a few other girls. They reserved one side of perverts’ row for the night. We were all having a good time, and this idiot dancer dressed as a construction worker decided not to tie his boots properly, and, well, long story short, I was the lucky girl who got up close and personal with his steel-toe boot. Right to the forehead. I lost balance, fell off my seat, and got this nice parting gift because of it.” Holly pointed to her swollen bruise and sighed. “It was party over after that, and we all came home a few hours earlier than expected.”

“What an asshole,” he growled, looking really angry. “Are you okay? Please tell me you put ice on it? And I hope you didn’t go to bed right away. It looks like I’ve woken you—”