Read Cursed Ecstasy (Cursed Series) Online
Authors: t. h. snyder
“I was worried about you,” he remarks, nuzzling his face into the side of my neck.
Goose bumps take over my arms and legs, while a chill races through my body. I don’t know that I’ll ever stop feeling the way I do when I’m near him. My body takes over and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.
“I’m fine, Dault, promise.”
Still holding me in his arms, he squeezes me ever so gently.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
I can’t help but laugh.
Pulling himself away from me, he looks down at me with a puzzled smirk on his face.
“What’s so funny?”
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t laugh, but this is all just too cute. Seeing you concerned and asking me if I’m okay is just a bit out of character for you. Well, it is for the Dault I’ve dealt with over the past few weeks.
Shaking his head, he lets his arms fall from me and to his side. With a scowl on his face, he moves to the couch and falls back onto it.
“Don’t let it upset you, it’s just different,” I say, walking toward him.
“I told you this is all new to me, Etty, I’m really trying. I’ve never had to be good for someone else before.”
Taking a seat right next of him, I reach for his hands and intertwine my fingers with his.
“Dault, I’m not expecting you to change who you are overnight. I liked you from the first moment I met you in the diner. Even though you may act a certain way, it doesn’t mean you have to do a complete personality makeover.”
“I just want to…hell, I don’t even know. My entire life I’ve been a fuckup and I don’t want to do that with you.”
“I get it, I really do. Just don’t change who you are, okay?”
“Yeah, okay,” he replies, pulling me in closer to him.
I adore the fact that he’s been trying so hard over the last few hours. He wants to make this work and I have no doubts about that. It’s going to take time and it’s only been twenty-four hours since he confessed his feelings. I can’t expect him to change with the snap of a finger, no matter how much he wants it.
“Well, if you don’t want to talk about what happened tonight, let me just hold you for a while.”
“Mmm, I’d like that much better.”
Removing my hands from his, I turn my back to his chest and curl into his warm body.
Nothing could ruin this perfect moment as silence fills the room. My body is completely relaxed against his as the steady beat of his heart causes me to close my eyes.
“I have an idea,” he whispers.
My eyes dart open, “Yeah, what’s that?”
“My schedule isn’t jam packed tomorrow, so I was thinking we could actually go out and do something, just the two of us.”
Lifting myself off of his chest, I turn and look at him. His eyes are set against mine and a smile spreads across his face; his dimples popping out just make me want to lick him, but I can’t.
“What’s wrong?”
“You…you’re just too much, Dault.”
With a laugh he pulls me against him, the warmth of his body radiating against mine.
“You have no idea what you’re getting yourself into with me, Etty. You sure you want in on this ride?”
Moving onto my side, I wrap my arms around his waist and rest my head on his chest.
“Of course I do, no matter how bumpy or smooth this thing is going to be for us, I want it.”
“Day by day, babe,” he says, kissing my forehead. “I’m going to do this right, no matter how much it kills me.”
“Sounds good to me, now talk, Dault. Tell me everything. I want to know you, understand you, and be a part of whatever it was that made you who you are.”
His chest rises and falls as he inhales and exhales a deep breath.
“I’m not sure where to start but the beginning.”
“Start wherever you want, I’m here to listen.”
“I need you to know that I haven’t told anyone this story—not even Steve and Cliff know the truth of my childhood. Linc is really the only one that knows everything about me. I’ve preferred to keep it that way in fear that anyone that knew would run.”
“I’m not running, Dault. If you haven’t scared me off by now, you need to know I’m not going anywhere. If you don’t want to tell me or talk about it, I’ll respect that. I don’t want to push you into doing anything you don’t want to do.”
“No, babe, that’s not it at all. It’s just difficult to bring up some of this shit. Thinking about it is one thing, but having to tell the story is like drilling a nail into my chest.”
“Then take your time, there’s no rush. You can tell me as much or as little as you want. It’s all up to you.”
“Okay, Etty, here we go,” he says, pulling me closer and running his fingers through the loose strands of hair that have fallen from my messy bun.
“Mmmmkay,” I respond, relaxing my body into his.
“My family was anything but ordinary. We were very blue collar, middle class people that made do with what we had. I grew up a few miles away from Linc on the other side of town. Even though it was only a couple of minutes away, it was like we lived in different worlds. His family was wealthy and lived in a nice house, as for me…well, not so much. My dad worked at a factory and my mom stayed home with me. I didn’t have any brothers or sisters, so for the most part it was just me and Mom. I hated being in that house because I knew as soon as he’d get home, things would go to shit. No matter what I did, he was on my case about something. At first he would yell, scream, and throw things in my direction. As I got older, maybe five or six, he started hitting me. By the time I was seven, he was beating me with a belt or whatever else he could grab. My mom tried to stop him, but it was pointless; he’d hurt us both until he was too tired to keep going.”
He pauses for a brief second, and I can feel the rapid beating of his heart through his chest. It hurts to hear the pain he went through as such a small child; no one should ever have to go through that agony.
“One night Linc came over. I was surprised to see him considering it was the night of his father’s election. We went straight to my room and played video games so that we’d be out of the way when my dad got home. That night was one of the worst nights of my life.”
Dault’s body starts to shake and I know exactly where this is going. Linc told me in detail the events that took place.
Moving into a seated position, I pull Dault’s face into my hands. His skin is pale and I can tell he’s upset as he reflects on his memories.
“Dault, you don’t have to do this. I can’t imagine how hard it is for you to relive these memories from your past.”
Leaning his face into my hands, he closes his eyes.
“I want to tell you, Etty, I want you to know it all. That night all but destroyed me. After hiding in the closet with Linc and hearing the sounds coming from the other room, I knew what we were going to find. The sight of Mama lying on the ground, covered in blood, was almost too much for me. In my mind, I knew he was going to eventually do it, but actually hearing and seeing it all tore me apart. I’d hoped that the memories would fade, that the sounds would eventually deteriorate, but they still find me in my sleep. My life changed so much after that night and I didn’t know how I’d recover. Police were everywhere, asking so many questions, but all I wanted was to be with Mama. They took her away from me and I didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye.”
The sorrow in his voice is killing me. I can’t imagine how hard it is for him to dredge up the memories of his past. No matter how badly he wants to share this with me, I can’t let him go on.
“Okay, no more tonight. It’s been a rough day and I don’t want to end it on a sad note.”
Nodding his head, he opens his eyes and leans forward, pressing his lips against my forehead.
“Thank you, Etty.”
“Don’t thank me, Dault, we’re in this together. When the time is right, we’ll talk more. For now, I just want you to hold on to me. I’ve wanted to be like this in your arms for so long, it almost doesn’t seem real.”
For the next few moments, we hold one another as we sit on the couch. With my head on his chest, my eyes start to feel heavy and the weight of the day is pulling me closer to sleep.
“You should get some sleep, Etty. You’ve had a long night and I know you couldn’t have gotten decent sleep last night lying on this couch.”
Pulling myself off of him, I let out a long yawn and stretch my arms over my head.
“I’m so sleepy.”
“Then I suggest you head upstairs and get some rest. I’ll lock up before I head next door.”
Shaking my head, I pull on his arms.
“I don’t want you to go. Would you stay here with me tonight?”
“On the couch?”
Letting out a laugh, I lean forward, resting my forehead against his.
“No, Dault, I want you here…with me…in my bed.”
With two strong hands, Dault grabs on to my face.
“Etty, I’m not saying I don’t want to stay with you, but….dear god, don’t judge me for this. I want to do this right. I don’t want you to be like the others.”
Sitting back, I stare into his eyes. I’m in awe of this man. He’s trying so hard, doing so much to show me that he’s serious about us.
A smile comes across my face as I lean into him, placing my lips against his.
Holy shit, I think I just fell in love with the biggest womanizer on the planet.
Chapter 21
The sound of birds chirping and the sun beaming in through the room causes my eyes to open. I feel like I’m in a fucking Snow White movie for Christ’s sake.
Unable to budge my arm, I look down to see my crazy blue-haired goddess lying against my body. Her legs are tangled with mine and her long hair is cascading down her back. She looks so peaceful. We’ve spent the last two nights wrapped in one another’s arms and I couldn’t be happier. Just having her near me again has made a huge difference in the way I feel. I could’ve lost out on something great if I hadn’t pulled my head out of my ass.
For the first time in…ever…I feel my heart skip a beat. Two days ago I would have kicked anyone that told me this was going to happen. With all of the anger, resentment, and jealousy that I’ve been fighting through, I never figured Etty would be the one that would help me change who I am. I get that I have to
want
it for it to happen, but having her by my side is going to make things so much easier.
Last night, I started to open up to her by sharing my memories of that night. I thought I was going to go back into panic mode but I didn’t. She was there, giving me the strength I needed to relive some of the most dreaded memories of my past.
Even though it was unexpected, she’s become the rock I’ve needed for so long.
In all of my adult years, I’ve never wanted to let anyone in; I was much better living life on my own. I was the man of the Cursed crew that could do as I wished and none of them judged me for the ways in which I acted. I was living a life of ink, sex, and more sex.
Hell yeah, I still want the ink and the sex, just now it will be with one woman. One woman, who in a short time has shown me that I can change for the better. I can be the man Mama would be proud of and I won’t stop ‘til I know I can make Etty the happiest she’s ever been.
Having Etty here with me, I now know that I don’t want to live life like I was before. I want so much more for me and for her. I don’t know how I hid my real feelings from her for so long. It just goes to show that hurt and anger can play tricks on one’s mind that no one can steer clear of until it’s smack dab in their faces.
So long, asshat Dault, hello Mr. Romance.
The thought alone makes me chuckle, and I don’t know how the hell I’m gonna do it…but I’ll die trying.
Rolling onto my side, I sweep one arm under Etty’s warm body and the other along her side.
Looking down at her, she’s still peacefully sleeping. I don’t want to wake her, so I just lie here, watching her as she sleeps.
Fuck, I’m turning into a creeper.
I’ve let her sleep long enough; it’s time to bring on the day and plan our first night out.
Turning onto my stomach, I prop myself up on all fours and start to bounce on the bed. She turns as her small frame bounces along the center of the mattress.
With wide eyes, she looks up at me, lets out a groan, and pulls the pillow over her face.
“No way, gorgeous, it’s time to get up.”
“No,” she mumbles from beneath the pillow.
“Don’t make me wake you up. Believe me, you’ll be sorry.”
“No, I want to sleep…go home,” she says with a giggle.
“That’s it, you asked for it.”
I continue to bounce on the bed, watching as she holds the pillow over her face.
Leaning over her body, I begin to tickle her until she can’t stand it anymore. She tosses the pillow from her face, giving me the sexiest smirk while narrowing her eyes at me.
“Come on, baby, time to get up,” I say, falling onto my back.
“What time is it?” she asks, moving herself to lie on my chest.
Running my fingers up and down her back, she lets out a purring sound. If I could, I’d stay in bed with her all day, but I need to get up and head into the shop.
“I don’t know, but the damn birds were chirping something fierce and it woke me up.”