Deeper (13 page)

I blow a long whistle as I come up to the pool. It’s shallow, but it’s not a problem, and I do a swimmer dive in, straight and fast towards the circle she’s in. I go straight through the guys, boys really, surrounding her. I cut through them easily. They’re just small bullies who wouldn’t dare do something like this alone.

She looks up at me, eyes dazed, as she starts to sink under. I lunge forward and grab her, hold her against me in a ball, and push my way out of the group of boys.

They’re animals, but I don’t have time to hate them until she’s safe. I set her down on the stairs, and she steadies herself on the railing, looking like she’s about to faint. I brush her hair back and check her eyes, which are starting to focus.

When I’m sure she can hold herself on the rail, I turn back to her attackers. The boys are looking at me and each other, fear on their faces as they try to scatter. The fun is over, and now they’re just focused on how to get away with what they’ve done. I won’t let them.

I call for Patrick, who has just now reached the pool. He jumps in fully clothed, blocking their exit on that side of the pool. Some look as young as fourteen, and they’ve just participated in an almost gang rape.

“Don’t move.” I keep one hand on Rain and put out the other and they stop and look from me to him. “Don’t move. Don’t even think. You’re going to stay here. And I’m going to call the police.”

Several men run over from the slide line. “What’s going on?”

“Watch these boys.” I don’t like involving patrons, but I can’t risk them running on me. I’ll need to get out and call the police.

Rain pushes my arm aside. “I’ll call the police,” she says, surprising me like she always does. “You watch them, they could hurt someone.” She pulls herself out of the water and limps to the office. She always impresses me, whether it’s the way she trains, or the way she handles herself during stuff like this. So calm. So strong. Maybe it’s her strength that is pulling me in. Maybe if I was with someone like her, I wouldn’t have to go through everything I went through with Camille.

When she’s safely seated in the office, I turn my attention back to the boys. I want to just get in and beat all of them down, but several of them are clearly minors, and the fear on their faces makes it clear that anything I do now would be unjustified.

I’ll have to let the police handle it. Still, they disgust me. Rain didn’t even look that scared when all five of them were ganging up on her. I don’t know what makes men like this. I don’t understand it at all. I don’t understand why you would get any pleasure from taking something that should only be given.

I don’t understand what happened to Camille. I don’t understand what almost happened to Rain. I don’t understand what Chad was doing at the party, why no didn’t mean no.

I’ll never understand men like these and I never want to. I wish I knew how the rest of us are supposed to live in the world with them, how we’re supposed to deal with the fallout of their messes. I also just wish I could eradicate them all.

I try not to let the images of them surrounding Rain flood my mind, but it’s hard. Someone already raped one girl I loved. They took advantage of the softness and vulnerability that I loved about her, and they took her life. She was never the same.

Seeing them surrounding Rain, this new beacon of hope in my life, trying to do the same, to take advantage of her goodness and rip her up inside and out, I can’t even explain how it feels. How badly I want to make sure that never happens to her. It tears at me inside my head.

Like this world is too twisted for good things anymore. Like good people can’t possibly survive against these odds. Like the bad will always win, and evil will always triumph.

I’m tired of the vigilance. If only you could trust people to be good when your back is turned.

I have to stay protective. Even if Rain hates it. Protecting Rain is more important to me than just redeeming myself. I’m starting to care for her. I want her to be safe. I need her to be. I don’t want her to end up like Camille, because I’m falling for her.

The thought stops me, freezes me in place. I turn to look at the office and she’s in there, making a phone call, swiping hair out of her eyes while she gives them info. She’s disheveled and red and a complete mess, and I’m totally smitten in only four weeks of being with her.

She’s strong and I don’t ever want to see that taken from her.

Amy comes up beside me and sits on the side of the pool. “It’s my fault,” she sobs. “I got too close to get my water bottle.”

I stare at her, then at Rain, not comprehending. “They pulled you in?”

Amy nods, and a tear runs down her cheek. “She jumped in and took my place. She pushed me out.” She swipes at the tear. “So stupid.”

My heart sinks. I should have known. Why was she playing hero like that? Why didn’t she call me? How could she put herself in danger like that? How could she do that to me?

I’ll never be able to get that image out of my mind. I know I should think she was noble. I’m glad that Amy didn’t have to go through that. But it only registers with the sane part of my brain, not the one that went insane when it saw her there with five guys tearing at her, practically drowning her.

After the cops come and arrest the boys, and take statements, I head to the senior guard office, where Rain is sitting with her head back on the chair, looking dazedly up at the ceiling. We’re both tired, and the last thing she needs is me fighting with her. I want to shake her and ask her how she could be so stupid, but it’s not what she needs right now.

I enter the office and she spins towards me, not moving her head up. “Is Amy okay?”

I sigh, holding off a new wave of irritation until she’s taken care of. “She’s fine. We’ve gotta get you to first aid.”

“I’m fine.” She’s spaced out, still facing the ceiling, so I come over to the chair, pick her up in my arms, kick open the office door with my foot, and head to the first aid room. She’s so light.

Sarah, the senior guard from morning swim, has already offered to switch from the lap lane to Rain’s shift, and we’ll be fine with three instead of four on the lap pool for now. Amy’s back out watching the water, though she’s shaken. We can’t have less than three out there.

When I get to the break room, I tell the guard on break to head out and start rotation and he agrees earnestly, sending a concerned glance over his shoulder at Rain in my arms. Sure it’s a chaotic place, and in a week we’ll usually have dramatic incidents, but it’s always different when it’s one of our own. It shakes everyone up.

I set Rain down on the small table usually reserved for kids. She steadies herself and frowns at me. “I’m fine.”

“You’re not.” There are numerous scrapes over her shoulders and arms, but none on her face, which isn’t surprising considering that isn’t where they were aiming. I pull out a pack of alcohol wipes. “This is going to hurt, sorry.”

She nods. “I guess I could have gotten some sort of disease, couldn’t I?” Her eyes widen as she thinks of it. I want to go pummel them again, seeing the fear there.

“Shhh.” I brush her hair away from her face, caressing her cheek lightly. “No. Not unless their blood was mixing with yours. But yeah, the pool’s not that clean, so I’ll need to disinfect.” I touch a wipe to the first cut, wipe away the light red in the scratches there. She doesn’t even flinch.

“Good girl.”

She sticks out her tongue, but leans back on her hands and lets me work. I put a ludicrous number of waterproof bandages on her after finishing cleaning the cuts and she laughs. Not her regular laugh, but a hoarse one. I just want to hug her and feel that she’s fine, but I have to let her know how stupid that was first.

“How could you do that?”

“Excuse me?” She turns to me slowly, meets my eyes wearily. “How could I what?”

“You should have called me. You shouldn’t have gone in.”

“So they could have Amy instead? Is that it?”

“You could have both ended up in trouble.” I put the case away and turn away from her for a moment.

“But we didn’t.” She hops off the table and comes in front of me. “I got her out. Now you’re gonna tell me not to protect my own guards?”

“Yeah, not if it puts you in danger. Not your job.”

“And it’s not your job to protect me,” she shakes her head. “But you still do.”

“So I shouldn’t have jumped in then?”

“No, you should do that, it’s just…” She looks down. “You’re not the only one who wants to keep people safe, Knight. I couldn’t leave her there, not when I could be there.”

Something’s off here. She’s too certain that she’d rather take Amy’s place. Is she really just pure altruistic, or is there something else going on?

“Just next time, call me.”

“If there is a next time. I know what to watch for now.” She folds her arms.

“Just call me. Please.” I run my hands over her shoulders, looking for any other cuts, reassuring myself that she’s fine. “Maybe I should take the guard shift from here on out.”

“Knight, no,” she says, looking up at me with pleading eyes. “I can handle it. You know I can. I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again. We’ll do a training on it.”

I nod hesitantly.

She leans forward, puts her head against my chest. “Thank you. For saving me.”

“Of course. Anytime.” I put my hand up over her hair. “But I really think we should talk about how you run the guard shift. You need to be safer.”

“Look Knight,” she says, pulling back. “I don’t need you to tell me how to do my job. Do you tell the other sups how to do their jobs?”

“It’s different. You aren’t just my coworker,” I say.

“What are we then? We kissed, it was fun, sure, but we aren’t dating. You aren’t my boyfriend. You don’t get to tell me how you think I should work, any more than any other coworker. I’m sorry you had to intervene, I’m sorry it bothered you to see me in trouble, but I can’t and won’t leave one of my guards in danger while you come running to do my job for me.”

“What if we were dating?”

“What?” Her eyebrows come down and she backs up a fraction, shocked. “What do you mean?”

“What if we were dating? Would I have a right then?”

“To what?”

“To ask you to be a little safer out there when you’re working? To protect you?”

She frowns. “I don’t know.”

“Date me,” I say. I lean forward, backing her against the wall. Hopefully to the guards it just looks like I’m doing more first aid. I lean down close to her face. “We’ve been on a date. It’s not that much more to just date me.”

“I can’t,” she says reluctantly.

“Can’t have sex, I know. Can’t fall in love. I know all your silly rules. I’m not trying to make you break them, though I’d be proud if I could. I just want to be more to you, Rain. I want to be someone you listen to, someone who has a right to say something when you do something stupid, because it affects me too. Because it already does affect me. Date me.”

“I don’t know,” she says, looking away. I can tell she wants to say yes, so why won’t she?

“You’ve been out with me.” I pull her face to me, look into her eyes. “I can’t stop thinking about you. Date me.”

“Knight…” She puts her hand over mine but doesn’t say anything. She’s my partner, she’s been my other half at work for weeks, and been in dreams when I’m not with her. I don’t see why she doesn’t see what I do. That we’re meant to be, no matter how hard it is on either of us. We’re a perfect fit.

“I’ve got a shift to run,” I say, because it’s time to pull back and let her come to me if she wants to. I release her and move towards the front door. When I get there I look back. “Come talk to me after work. Let me know your answer then.”

I shut the door, and the finality of it all washes over me. I’ve just asked her out. No turning back now. If she says yes, I’ll be dating my co-sup. If she says yes, she’ll be mine. I take a deep breath and put my guard persona back on. Four more hours. Four more hours and I’ll know how she feels about me.

When the last guard leaves for the day, I head over to Knight’s office to give him an answer. I don’t really have one yet, but maybe something will come to me.

It’s been an exhausting day, and as I enter the office, I can tell by the pity in his eyes that he doesn’t realize today has been a great triumph for me. I know I almost got really hurt. If he hadn’t rescued me I could even be dead. But that doesn’t change that this time I protected someone. This time I took the hit. That’s all I’ve wanted ever since William died.

I wish Knight could understand how much that means to me. Unfortunately he’s just as serious about protecting me as I am about protecting others.

“You okay?” he asks, standing up and pushing his chair behind me, forcing me to sit.

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”

He scowls at me like I should know the answer. I suppose I do, but I’ve lived once when I shouldn’t have and I know that it’s better to be the injured one than the one that unfairly got away. I relax in the chair, trying not to openly gloat.

He folds his arms and leans against the desk. “Not to ruin your obviously wonderful and frankly insane mood, but did you think about what I said?”

“Sort of.” I bite my lip. “It’s been kind of a stressful day.” Kind of a wonderful day, because I saved Amy. And Knight saved me too, so I didn’t have to pay any ultimate price. Except that I probably deserved to pay a price. Like William did. The thought steals the smile from my face.

“Hey, where are you going in there?” He pulls up a chair and pulls mine over to him, then leans forward and stares into my eyes. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“You know,” he says, putting a hand up to my chin and turning my face, which I was turning away, towards him. “Sometimes you remind me of someone.”

“Who?” Is it Camille? Do I remind him of his ex, is that the only reason he’s interested?

“Me,” he says. He leans in and covers my lips with his. It’s utterly quiet in the building. He holds my arms. It’s our fourth kiss, and something in me reacts stronger each time, maybe it’s the way the day has gone, both elating and terrible, but I dig my fingers into his hair and pull his lips harder against mine. His hands wrap around my waist and he pulls me close.