Effortless (28 page)

I hoped he didn’t think I was whining. I knew his schedule was
hard. I knew he was trying to see me. Wiping a stubborn tear from
my eye, I sniffed again for a different reason. I’d so wanted to
introduce him to my family, to spend the holiday with him, to
just…see him.

His reply came while I was wiping my nose with the back of my
jacket sleeve.
‘Yeah, I know. I tried…I’m really sorry.’
While I tried to think of something that was encouraging and
sympathetic, not snippy and childish, my phone buzzed and chirped
again.
‘Are you okay? You’re not crying, are you?’

Sniffling and wiping my nose again, I frowned that he thought
I’d turn into a blubbering mess so rapidly. True, my stomach was
twisted and tears were freely rolling down my cheeks now, but I
didn’t necessarily want him to know that.
‘No…I’m fine. I know
you tried. I’m okay…really.’

Thinking that I had no idea when I’d actually see him again, a
stubborn sob escaped me. My phone sounded at me right after. I had
to swipe my fingers under my eyes to read his message. 

‘You’re lying.’

Sniffling as more tears embarrassingly ran down my face, I shook
my head at the screen. “Am not…” My voice was a little petulant as
I replied to a tiny piece of machinery that couldn’t hear or
understand me.

Just as my thumbs came down to type him a message reiterating
just how completely fine I was, even though I wasn’t, my phone
chirped at me. Blinking, I opened his message.

‘Are too.’

I stared at my phone like it had just grown lips and talked to
me. I did say that smartass comment out loud, didn’t I? Did I
subconsciously text it too? I was a little worn out from travel,
and the holidays…and my parents. Flipping through my outbox, I
double-checked all of my messages.

“How did you know that, Kellan?” I muttered as I looked for a
message I didn’t remember sending.

My phone buzzed while I was browsing yesterday’s texts. Shaking
my head, I shifted back to the inbox. 
‘I know that
because I know everything.’
My eyes widened even more. Another
message had come in while I was reading that one and I immediately
opened it next.
‘I also lied…turn around.’

My heart in my throat, I did as my phone commanded me. It was
like emerging from a dream, or maybe, falling into one. Stepping
away from the shadow of an oak tree at the base of the hill, just a
few feet away from me actually, Kellan stepped down into the
moonlight. His hand tucked his phone into his leather jacket as he
did. I stood from the bench as he came into view.

My God, but he was beautiful.

My mouth dropped open as fresh tears sprang into my eyes; happy
tears this time. Snow lightly gathering in his thick, messy hair,
his lips curled into a devilish smile as he stared at me.

“Kellan,” I breathed.

Then I was gone, rushing towards him before my head even
registered the movement. Chuckling, his face breaking into a
playful grin, he started walking towards me. Walking wasn’t good
enough for me. I flew to him. I hadn’t had his arms around me in
weeks. I hadn’t had more than his voice in my ear for weeks. I
needed so much more now.

I leapt into his arms when I finally slipped and slid my way
over to him. Kellan laughed as my arms cinched around his neck. The
warmth of the reunion melted all of the iciness from my body. I’d
never felt such complete peace. He lifted me a good foot, swinging
me around in a circle. I was laughing when he set me down, my
earlier despair gone.

Just as his lips started coming towards mine, I shoved his
shoulder back. My despair may be gone, but that was not a nice
joke. “You were kidding? You’re such a jerk.”

Chuckling, his eyes even more blue in the blue light filtering
through the trees, he raised an eyebrow. “I thought I was a
prick?”

Shaking my head, I grabbed his cheeks, pulling his face towards
mine. We could argue the semantics of his assholeness later. I
needed more than just words right now. Kellan’s arms wrapped around
my waist as our lips melded together. Cold and hot at the same
time, our mouths softly felt the other’s. Our breath’s vapor
between us, he muttered, “I’m sorry I’m late.”

My hands drifted up to tighten in his hair, the long strands on
the top damp with melted snow. “I’m just glad you’re here.”

Our soft but intense kiss broke apart, and Kellan rested his
head against mine. His eyes flicked over my face, studying me,
maybe seeing how I’d changed in the past few weeks. “I’ve missed
you…so much.”

Grinning, I pressed my lips back to his. “I’ve missed you,
too.”

We kissed in the lightly falling snow, a few feet away from the
frozen duck pond that students sometimes skated on if it iced over
enough. We kissed until my fingers were so numb I could no longer
feel the thick strands of his hair wrapped around them. That still
didn’t stop me though. I needed his lips on mine. I needed his body
pressed into mine. I really didn’t care if I froze solid, and
became a living work of art here…as long as he was with me.

He pushed me back though, when I went for his mouth again. “We
should go, you’re frozen.”

His eyes traveled down my body and I felt anything but cold.
“I’m fine,” I stuttered, my body actually chillier than my mind
believed it was.

He smirked, a cloud of moisture escaping his mouth. “Your teeth
are chattering.”

I leaned up, trying to will my frostbitten fingertips to pull
his head back to me. “I don’t care…”

Chuckling more, his hands grabbed my waist and twisted me
around. Pulling my hips into his body and wrapping his arms over my
chest, warming me, he murmured in my ear, “Well, I care.” I closed
my eyes and leaned back into his embrace; I’d missed this so much.
His breath warm down the side of my neck he added, “Besides, I
can’t make love to you out here…”

My eyes sprang open and I took a step forward. Grabbing his
hand, I started leading him away from my favorite pond. “You’re
right…it is getting pretty cold.”

He looked down and shook his head. Small drops of snow that had
melted in his hair fell to the ground as his amused smile widened.
When he peeked back up at me, a drop landed on his cheek, sliding
its way down to his neck…lucky drop.

His grin breaking into a mischievous one as I pulled him along,
he told me, “I know my trick was a little mean, but it did prove
one very important thing.”

Twisting to walk beside him, I looped my arm through his and
peered up at him. “Besides the fact that you haven’t changed…that
you’re still a prick?”

He chuckled and nodded. “Yes, aside from that.” As I stared at
him with a small smile on my face, his eyes searched mine and he
shook his head. “You really did miss me,” he whispered, his eyes
looking almost…surprised by the information.

I stopped us in our tracks and stared up at him. He held my
gaze, then swallowed. Shaking my head, I cupped his cheek. “Of
course I missed you. I missed you every day, every hour…practically
every second.”

He smiled really quick and then looked away, like he was
embarrassed for bringing it up. “Yeah, I saw that.” He shook his
head, still not looking at me. “I just…no one’s ever missed me
before…”

I barely heard his voice, but I clearly heard the emotion behind
it. Moving my hand to his chin, I forced his gaze back to mine. “I
miss you when you’re gone. I feel like I can’t breathe when you’re
away. I think about you so often, it borders on obsession.” I
tilted my head and ran my frozen fingers over his jaw. “I love
you…so much.”

He swallowed and smiled, his jaw trembling. Not able to answer
me, he only nodded.

After grabbing his bag from where he’d deposited it by the oak
tree, we made our way to my dad’s car. With the heater on high, we
slowly drove back to my parents. Laying his head back on the seat,
Kellan had a peaceful smile on his lips as he held my hand.  I
had a smile on mine that I’d given him one. He was finally feeling
what it was like to be loved by somebody. To be cared for. To be
missed. The simple things that we all take for granted…and he was
relishing each moment, because he’d never had them.

It was later than I’d anticipated when we parked in the
driveway. Examining the modest two-story house I’d grown up in, I
looked up at the windows where my parents slept. The lights were
all off—a good sign. Dad had probably wanted to stay up all night,
waiting for my return with my bad influence of a boyfriend, but Mom
must have put a stop to that. Or Anna. She wasn’t intimidated by
them and would tell Dad exactly what an ass he was being if the
situation called for it. I wouldn’t put it passed her if she’d
marched him to his room and made him stay there, like he was the
child and she was the adult.

Anna…gotta love her.

Turning the car off, I giggled as I twisted to Kellan. He lifted
his head, looking over the house, then over at me. “Want to see my
room?” I flushed, feeling sixteen again…although I’d never, ever
snuck a boy into my bedroom before.

Kellan tilted his head and smiled. “I’d love to.”

He grabbed his bag from the trunk, then we quietly stepped into
the home that seemed empty. I knew it wasn’t though and cautioned
Kellan to be quiet. He smiled, containing a laugh and shook his
head. He may think it funny that his first visit to my family home
involved sneaking around like we were robbing the place, but he’d
understand why if we accidentally woke my dad up. If we did that,
Kellan would be interrogated until morning.

Luckily though, my parents were the early-to-bed, early-to-rise
type people. As I paused, listening for sounds, I clearly heard
Dad’s lumberjack snores echoing from upstairs. I pictured him
asleep in his reading chair, book in hand as he’d drifted off
waiting for me to come back home. Poor guy. He’ll probably kick
himself for falling asleep on duty. I smiled, wondering if Anna had
snuck in and turned off his light when he’d finally passed out, as
a signal to me, to let me know that he was asleep and it was safe
to…reunite with my boyfriend.

Pointing at the couch, I whispered to Kellan that he could leave
his bag there since he’d be sleeping there. He raised an eyebrow at
me as he frowned, clearly not happy with anything that involved him
sleeping so far away from me. Smiling, I gave him a quick kiss
before adjusting the pillow and afghan Mom had laid out for him.
Kellan shook his head at the plastic-wrapped contraption and popped
his shoes off. Slipping his jacket off, he looked about ready to
crawl into the bed my parents expected him to sleep in.

Just as he started to sit, I pulled him to his feet. “You’re not
actually sleeping there, silly,” I whispered in his ear.

He grinned at me devilishly as he glanced upstairs. “Are you
sure? I don’t want to get you in trouble?”

I nodded, backing away from his pretend bed. “Yes…you’re with
me.” He grinned more, rushing towards me to cup my cheeks, pulling
me in for an intense kiss.

I stumbled as my heel hit the stairs. I nearly fell, but Kellan
grabbed me and kept me upright. He chuckled while I clung to him.
“Quiet,” he whispered.

I nodded, giggling a little, then I found his lips again. We
somehow managed to get up the stairs without waking up anybody…or
everybody. Our breaths were fast between our rarely parting lips. I
felt every curve of his mouth, the warmth of his tongue. I’d
imagined kissing him for weeks, but it was nothing—nothing—like the
real thing. I supposed that was one plus side to Kellan being so
provocative in his youth…he was good at what he did. No, he was
amazing at it. There wasn’t one inch of my body that wasn’t on fire
by the time I opened the door to my bedroom.

Already having removed my jacket on the way up the stairs,
Kellan blindly tossed it into the room. I silently closed the door,
taking a moment to press him into it. He sucked in a quick breath
as my body compressed against his. “I missed you,” he
whispered.

I moaned some sort of answer, my alive-again fingers tangling
into his thick hair. His hands traveled down my back, over my
bottom. Squatting slightly, he grabbed my thighs and lifted me up
as he took a step from the door.

Our mouths never parting, he walked me to my bed. Nervous,
excited energy flooded into me. I’d never so directly gone against
my dad. He would be fuming if he knew Kellan was in here with me,
about to…well, make me a woman, since in my dad’s eyes I was
probably still a virgin.

When Kellan bumped his legs into my bed, he leaned over and
deposited me onto it. Holding his head to me, I scooted up the
mattress so he could join me. Crawling on his hands and knees, he
followed me until we were in the center. Then, with a quietly
content groan, he laid on top of me. We both stopped breathing and
broke apart.

Brunching his brows, Kellan looked down at my bed. Propping
himself up so that most of his weight was in his hands, he pushed
down against the mattress. It squeaked…loudly. I bit my lip. I’d
never noticed that my bed did that. Of course, I’d never had a boy
in it while my dad was asleep in the next room. Kellan frowned as
he did it again. The noise cut through the night…it was an
unmistakable sound. It practically screamed—
Hey, listen to us,
we’re having sex!