Finding Peace (Finding Series, Book 3) (14 page)

Gray hurried through the grocery store. He’d happily started wearing his ball cap and sunglasses again since his hair had finally started to grow back. He’d been so delighted just to have his eyebrows back, that he’d ended up climbing into the shower with Luke just to show him…well, not
just
to show him but it had definitely been one of the reasons he’d gotten in there. His weight was slowly starting to come back too and he felt better than he had in a long time. It was frightening how perfect his life was turning out to be – if he could just give Luke the freedom from being discovered then maybe, just maybe, they could build a life together. His gut was telling him that Luke was just as deep into the relationship as he was and since his gut had been what had brought Luke into his life in the first place, he wasn’t willing to ignore it even when the little voice in his brain was saying something else.

By the time he got back to the cabin, he half-expected Luke to be waiting for him on the porch steps like he sometimes did or to at least come around the side of the cabin. But when neither happened, Gray felt a twinge of worry. He let Ripley out of the truck and trotted inside and called Luke’s name. But he stopped dead when he saw the disposable cell phone sitting on the kitchen table.

He left it there by mistake, that’s all.

Gray’s first instinct was to go back outside and check the shed but the sight of the phone sitting on the table had him going to his bedroom instead. Luke had moved what little stuff he had into Gray’s room a while back but one glance in the closet showed the duffle bag was gone. Pain lanced through Gray and he didn’t bother to look in the dresser drawers to know they were empty. He also didn’t waste time checking the guest bedroom – he just hurried back out of the cabin, grabbing his keys as he went.

***

A tremor went through Luke as he pulled open the door to the police station and stepped inside. Just the sight of the police cruiser sitting on the street in front of the station had had him wanting to turn around but then he remembered the desperation in Gray’s voice as he explained his insane plan to go on the run with him and he strode for the door with renewed determination.

As soon as he stepped inside, Luke saw Jax sitting at one of two desks in the middle of the room. There was a reception desk right by the door but since it was empty, Luke walked past it.

“Afternoon,” Jax said as his eyes took in the way Luke had purposefully held his arms out from his body, his palms open, the strap of his duffle bag hanging from one hand.

“I’m here to turn myself in,” Luke said quietly as he carefully lowered the bag to the floor. He wasn’t surprised when the deputy stiffened at his statement and then stood and came around his desk. “I’m not armed but I have an unloaded gun and ammunition in my bag. You’ll find a warrant out for my arrest out of Fort Benning in Georgia. Luke Monroe. M.O.N-”

“Luke?”

Luke turned his head at the sound of the familiar voice. The sight of his stunned foster brother would have been amusing if Luke’s mind wasn’t so preoccupied with other things. Like the hell he was about to face. And the betrayal Gray would feel when he found out what Luke had done.

“It’s me, Rhys,” Luke said tiredly.

Rhys’ green eyes went wider and then a huge smile split his face and he was striding across the small space and dragging Luke into his arms. He’d apparently failed to notice Jax’s tense frame or heard Luke’s reason for being there.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Rhys asked as he still held on to him and Luke felt a pang of longing go through him. This man had been such an important part of his life and he’d been foolish enough to let that go. And now he’d have to watch the light go out in Rhys’ eyes as he realized the kid he’d sacrificed so much for was now a man he’d have to arrest.

Rhys put space between them and then scanned Luke up and down. “You look really good,” he announced before giving Luke another hug.

It was on the tip of Luke’s tongue to tell Rhys the same thing because the man looked happier than Luke had even thought possible – well, at least before he’d met Gray and learned what it was that could put that look on a man’s face. His thought was interrupted by the door behind him being yanked open and he knew before he even turned around who it was. When he did force himself to turn, his heart fell at the shocked look in Gray’s face. It was clear that while Gray had discovered he was gone, he hadn’t expected to find him there at the police station.

“No,” Gray whispered as he glanced from Luke to Jax. He shook his head violently. “No!” But then his eyes turned to Jax. “Jax, please don’t do this. I’m begging you!”

The heartbreak in Gray’s voice had Luke pulling free of the light hold Rhys still had on him and he went to stand in front of Gray. He grabbed hold of Gray’s arm and said, “Gray, Jax didn’t arrest me. I came here to turn myself in.”

His statement caught Gray off guard and though Luke wouldn’t have thought it possible, the pain in his gaze intensified. “Why?”

“You know why,” Luke said.

Gray shook his head again and then he was throwing his arms around Luke. “Don’t say anything, okay? My lawyer can be here in a few hours. I’ll get you the best defense money can buy-” Gray stammered.

A sense of cold washed through Luke as he realized what Gray was saying was completely true. The man would move heaven and earth to save him. He’d spend every day of his life and every dollar in his bank account to try to keep Luke out of jail only to die a slow death as he watched the man he loved rot in prison…and that was only by some twist of fate that kept Shaw from getting to him first. Desperation went through Luke as he glanced from Gray to Jax and then Rhys. He could tell Jax knew what he was about to do and the man actually looked like he was shaking his head. But Luke ignored him and turned his attention back to Gray.

“Gray, go home,” he said firmly and he forced himself to release his lover.

“No,” Gray snapped as he pulled his cell phone from his pocket and began dialing. Luke grabbed it from him and tossed it on a nearby desk.

“Gray, listen to me,” Luke said.

“No,” Gray nearly yelled as he tried to grab the phone.

“Damn it, Gray, haven’t you figured it out yet? I don’t want you!” he shouted.

The words had the desired effect and Gray stepped back as if Luke had struck him. But then his eyes hardened and Luke knew it wasn’t going to be that easy so he went in for the kill. “Even if by some miracle your lawyer sorts all this shit out, do you really think I’d stay here with you? After everything I told you about the military being my life?”

Gray paled but thankfully didn’t say anything. Not that it would have mattered because Luke felt like he had a mortal wound inside of him tearing open. “Did you think I’d actually want to be walking down some red carpet by your side, smiling for the cameras like some trained monkey all the while wondering what actor or groupie you were fucking behind my back?” Luke gave the knife one last twist by whispering, “You needed someone to take care of you, Gray, and I needed a place to hide out. The stuff between us was just a …perk.”

Luke actually had to grab the desk to keep himself upright at that point but Gray’s response was the exact opposite. His pretty gold eyes dimmed and then they went blank and Luke knew in that instant that his Gray was gone. The man before him merely reached past him to grab the cell phone off the desk and then he turned and walked out the door. He heard Gray’s truck start up a second later but there wasn’t even the squeal of tires to accompany the sound – no, his lie had done exactly what he’d intended. He turned his attention to Jax and ground out, “Luke Monroe. M.O.N.R.O.E. The charge is murder in the first degree.”

***

“Tell me what’s going on,” Luke heard Rhys say softly as a cup of coffee was pushed into his lax grip. The windowless room they were sitting in felt too small but he supposed it was better than a jail cell. He also wasn’t cuffed yet so there was that too. Not that it mattered because he’d been frozen within himself for the last ten minutes and didn’t even remember how he’d made it to the room with the small wood table and chairs.

“I should probably get an attorney first,” Luke whispered because that was the best he could manage considering his throat actually hurt.

“Fuck that,” Rhys snapped and then he was up and pacing the small room. It was so
Rhys
. Even when they were kids, Rhys had never been able to hide his feelings or sit still when confronted with something beyond his control. And he almost never accepted the fact that he couldn’t jump in and save someone or fix the situation.

“You can tell the sheriff that I’m waiving my right to an extradition hearing-”

Rhys slammed his hand down on the table. Lesser men would have jumped at the abrupt move but Luke merely used his sleeve to dab at the splash of coffee that that had sloshed over the cup and onto the table.

“Murder charges? What the hell happened?” Rhys bit out.

Luke sighed and then rehashed the story for Rhys. Rhys didn’t interrupt him at all but as soon as he was done he was asking question after question, just like any good cop would. Since his heart still felt like it had been run through by a knife, Luke finally cut Rhys off and said, “Make the call, Rhys. You know you don’t have a choice.”

“Fuck if I don’t,” Rhys snapped but he finally sat down. “Why didn’t you come to me when you got here?”

“Because I knew you’d go through hell and high water to help me even if meant giving this up,” Luke said as he waved his hand at Rhys’ uniform.

“So your plan was to leave? Just like that? Without even talking to me?”

“That was the plan,” Luke acknowledged.

“And then you met Gray?”

Even the sound of Gray’s name had Luke nearly keeling over in pain so he just nodded.

“Did…did something happen between you two?” Rhys asked, his voice gentle.

Luke could feel tears threatening and he had to blink his eyes rapidly to stop them from falling. “I felt something that first day…something I’d never felt for another man.”

“You were attracted to him?” Rhys offered.

Luke nodded. “But it was so much more than that. I was confused by the physical part of it but it was also the little stuff, you know?” Luke asked, though one look at Rhys told him the man wasn’t sure what he was talking about.

“Like the sound of his laugh or the way his smile is a little higher on one side of his mouth than the other or the way he would sneak Ripley food from his plate when he didn’t think I was watching.” Luke shook his head in frustration because even as he spoke, he realized that the words didn’t do justice for how he felt around Gray.

“Being around him is what I always thought coming home would feel like…but the kind of coming home you and I never got to have when we were kids, you know?”

A smiled spread across Rhys’ features making him look much younger than his 30 years. “I do know,” he said wistfully and Luke could only imagine that the man was thinking about his lovers. Gray hadn’t been able to tell Luke much about the two men Rhys had become involved with after his arrival in Dare but it was clear that whatever was happening between the three of them, it was exactly what Rhys needed.

“The things you said to him…” Rhys said, his features darkening.

Luke buried his face in his hands. “He wanted to give up his whole life just so he could go on the run with me.”

“And that’s why you turned yourself in?”

“What could I offer him, Rhys? Looking over his shoulder for the rest of his life? Never being able to contact his friends or family again? Always terrified he’d make a mistake that would get me or himself caught? You saw him out there – he wasn’t going to let me go! The man just spent the last two months fighting for his life and I’m supposed to ask him to sit around and wait for me in the hopes that I one day get out of prison? Or to waste his life savings on a defense that won’t do a bit of good? Or panic every time the phone rings because he knows it could be the call that says Shaw finally finished what he started?”

Rhys was quiet for a long time before he said, “From what I saw out there, he’s already in as deep as he can be, whether you want him to be or not. He’s not some foster family that’s going to dump you when things get to complicated, Luke.”

Before Luke could answer, there was a rap on the door and then Jax was pushing it open, his phone in hand. “I think we might have a problem,” he murmured as he held the phone out to Rhys. “Dane just texted it to me. He saw it on the Internet a few minutes ago.”

Rhys glanced at the phone and then bit out a curse before handing the phone to Luke. Fear went through Luke as he saw the picture of him and Gray sitting on the porch steps leading up to Gray’s cabin. He knew right away that the image had been snapped two days before when he and Gray had decided to sit outside after dinner and have a cup of coffee while they watched the sun set. While his name wasn’t mentioned, his image was clear as day.

“Jesus,” he muttered and he quickly clicked off the image to find the article. He bypassed the title and found what he was looking for. “Oh God, this has been online since yesterday morning,” he whispered. “I need to warn Gray,” he said as he stood and started looking for the contact list on Jax’s phone.

Jax took the phone from him and began scrolling but when a landline phone in the other room rang, he handed his cell to Rhys and left the room. Rhys found the number and hit dial but didn’t hand the phone to Luke. “He may not talk to you,” was all Rhys said in way of explanation. “Straight to voicemail,” Rhys muttered a moment later.