If Only to Forget (10 page)

I’m trapped. Trapped in the bedroom with a zombie on the other side. No weapons! How stupid could I be? What was I thinking?

Then a thought enters my head that I hadn’t even considered before, and more sobs rip their way out of me. Jim and Riley have no clue about Tori. They’ll get back and she’ll hear them, and she’ll attack. She’ll kill them, and then I’ll be all alone. What the hell am I going to do?

I take a deep breath and force the sobs to stop. I can’t cry. I won’t give into this. I need to take care of Tori so she doesn’t hurt the men. And I don’t want Jim to see her this way.

I climb to my feet as I scan the bedroom. We’ve been through every drawer and closet, so I know there aren’t any weapons, but maybe there’s something in here I could
use
as a weapon.

My eyes move across the room as I force my brain to think rationally. I could break a piece of furniture and use it to pummel her, but the stuff in here is old. Solid. It’s true what they say, they don’t build ‘em like they used to. So what else? A full-length mirror sitting in the corner of the room catches my eye, and I almost let out a sigh of relief. But that would be premature. First, I need to take care of Tori, then I can let out a deep breath.

I grab the small statue of a cherub off the dresser and throw it at the mirror. The thing shatters, and shards of glass rain down, falling to the floor. I say a silent prayer as I bend down to inspect the glass, hoping I can find a good-size piece. There has to be a shard big enough, a few inches long at least. I brush the glass around until one catches my eye. It’s only three inches, but it’s better than anything else in this room. It will give me a chance. Plus, I have a plan.

I grip the glass in my hand as I stand up, giving myself a little pep talk. “Okay, you need to be fast. Don’t act on emotions. You
can
do this, Kyra.”

Tori is still scratching at the door, but it’s calmer than it was before. Like she’s losing interest. I don’t want that. I want her going crazy.

I rap my knuckles against the door a few times, and she goes nuts. Her body slams against the other side so hard the whole thing shakes. It makes my pulse quicken, but I know I need to move. Now.

I turn the knob and take a deep breath, then slam my whole body into the door as hard as I can. It flies open, crashing into Tori. She growls, but I don’t let up. I push the door forward until it bangs against the wall, trapping the dead woman between it and the wall.

Her hands reach for me and she snarls, but I press my foot up against the door as hard as I can to keep it steady. She’s fighting, making it hard for me to keep the door where I want it. I press my hip against it and grip the glass harder. The sharp edges pinch my palm, but don’t break the skin. Thankfully.

“Okay, this is it.”

Tori snarls and I take a deep breath, then jump to the side. The door slams shut and Tori stumbles forward. She ends up falling on her face, which gives me the chance to jump on her back. I land on my knees, digging them into her spine. She flails under me. Growling. Snarling. I put a shaky hand on the back of her head and press her face to the ground. Taking a deep breath.

“I’m sorry, Tori.”

Then I slam the glass into her head. Pain slices across my palm and I cry out, but Tori goes still.

I roll off her and lean against the wall, panting. My eyes fill with tears and no matter how hard I try to blink them away, it’s impossible. Tori is dead and Riley and Jim may never make it back, then I’ll be alone.

I don’t want to be alone.

When the SUV pulls into the driveway I’m sitting on the porch. The sun is so low on the horizon it’s nothing more than half of an orange ball, glowing in the sky. Dust flies up behind the car, leaving a trail of smoke in the vehicle’s wake. Almost as if it were on fire. I don’t move. My hand throbs from where the glass cut me. Upstairs, Tori is laying in the hall with a sheet over her, and the zombie girl is still growling in the bedroom.

The truck pulls to a stop in front of the house, and it takes me two seconds to see that there’s only one person inside. Only the windows are tinted and the sun is so bright I can’t figure out who. Jim or Riley? And is the other man coming back in another car? Is he just a few minutes behind? It’s possible…Right?

No.

They wouldn’t split up and I know it, so clinging to the hope that the second man will drive up in a couple minutes is impossible. Someone didn’t make it back.

The driver’s door opens, and I get to my feet when Riley steps out. There’s a war inside me, and when tears spring to my eyes I have no idea what they’re from. The joy at seeing Riley, the realization that Jim is dead, or the relief that the man won’t have to see Tori the way she is.

“What happened?” I ask, unable to move from the porch steps.

“We ran into a horde. Couldn’t get out.” Riley stops in front of the car, six feet from me.

He’s filthy, but what strikes me the most about him is how different his eyes look when they meet mine. There’s a loss of innocence that wasn’t there before, like all the hope he’d been holding onto has finally drained away. Like he’s actually accepted that the world has gone to shit and we’re living on borrowed time. I hate seeing him like that.

And I hate that I’m about to add to it.

“Tori’s dead.”

Riley blinks, but no shock crosses his face. Maybe death will never shock us again after today. “What happened?”

“It was Sally. She must have been infected. Last night she kept pulling at her sleeves, I thought she was just nervous, but now I think she’d been bitten.”

He sighs and runs his hand through his hair. “We should have checked her.”

I shake my head like I can’t make sense of it, which I can’t. “It doesn’t make sense.”

Riley’s shoulders slump. “Does any of it make sense?”

No. It doesn’t.

We’re both silent for a few minutes, then without thinking I go to him. Crossing the distance between us feels like I’m crossing the Mojave Desert, but the second I wrap my arms around him it’s worth it. Like he’s a cool cup of water and I’m dying of thirst.

Riley wraps his arms around me and presses his lips to the side of my head. “I got supplies. We can leave in the morning.”

“Good,” I whisper. “I don’t want to stay here any longer. I want to get to our beach house and forget this farm house ever existed.”

“Me too.”

I slide my hand down his arm and lace our fingers together, then pull him toward the house. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

Inside, I warm water on the little camp stove while Riley strips. He washes himself in the dining room using a bar of soap and a washcloth. By the time he’s done with his face and arms, the water is brown.

He doesn’t dress once he’s clean. Instead, he undresses me. Slowly, kissing me gently as he undoes the buttons on my shirt, then slides it down my arms. His hands cup my breasts and the touch is so soothing I almost come undone. His lips kiss their way down to my chest, and he sucks one hard nipple into his mouth, rolling it between his teeth until my legs wobble. My mind is spinning so hard I don’t even know how I end up on top of the table, but once I’m there Riley pulls my pants down my legs.

No underwear comes in handy when all I want is for this man to be inside me. He climbs up on the table, his lips brushing against my skin as he does. When they meet mine, he plunges his tongue in. The kiss gets harder, becoming almost violent with need. I dig my nails into his back and pull him closer to me as I spread my legs, silently begging him to ease my pain.

Then he thrusts into me and I cry out against his mouth, but his lips don’t let up long enough for me to be able to catch my breath. Then he’s moving. Gripping my hips as he slams into me, sending my brain to that place where it’s impossible to think or remember.

My nails sink into his back so hard I’m sure they’ll draw blood, but I can’t loosen them. I’m panting, gasping for breath as everything inside me tightens in the most pleasurable way possible. My back arches off the table as I move my hips up to meet Riley, needing the release that’s so close I feel like I’m going to burst into flames if I don’t get it soon. Then he reaches between us and rubs his thumb against my clit, and I explode.

My orgasm crashes through me like a tsunami, and I find myself screaming Riley’s name as my body tightens around his dick. He stops rubbing my clit, but he doesn’t slow his thrusts, sending more and more ripples of pleasure through me until I felt like I’d never come down.

“I’m gonna come,” Riley grunts out, his face tense from his own pleasure. “In or out. What do you want?”

I shake my head and try to form coherent thoughts, but there aren’t any. So I say, “I don’t give a fuck.”

He nods, then moves faster, then all at once his whole body tenses and he presses himself harder into me as his fingers tighten on my hips. I wrap my legs around his waist, holding him to me as we both gasp for breath. My body feeling as raw as my heart did earlier.

After a few seconds, Riley moves and I release him. He collapses on the table next to me and we lay side by side, staring up at the ceiling. The scrapping of Sally’s feet against the floor above us is just barely audible, but I try to focus on Riley. And me. On us.

“Tell me we’re going to be okay.”

“We’re going to be okay.”

I nod even though I know he’s lying and he knows I know. Sometimes, lying to yourself is the only way you can get through.

atlas is sitting in my lap as we pull to a stop in front of the house. The sun will be setting soon, but for the moment it sparkles across the blue water of the Atlantic. I’ve never seen water this blue. I say a silent thanks to Tori for suggesting this location. It’s breathtaking.

We chose a house right on the beach, the major draw being the brick and iron gate surrounding the property. Seeing it, I can almost imagine that we’ll be able to have a real future here. A safe one.

A girl can dream.

“I’m looking forward to learning how to fish,” Riley says, putting the car into park.

“I’m looking forward to sun bathing.”

Riley grins, and I return it. The trip was long and exhausting but we got lucky and didn’t run into any major trouble. The good thing about this virus wiping things out so quickly is that most people didn’t have time to panic. There were a couple places were an accident had occurred, blocking our way, but in both instances all we had to do was cross to the other side of the highway.

Riley hands me a gun, then grabs a second one for himself. He and Jim were smart enough to clean out the local police station.

“We’ll check out the house, make sure it’s safe first. Sound good?”

“Yeah,” I say, sounding more sure of myself than I feel.

We stop outside the door and knock, just like we did when we got to the farmhouse. And just like that day there’s no answer. This time, however, when we go inside we’re greeted by a thumping coming from an upstairs room. It sends a shudder down my spine.

“I’ll take care of it,” Riley says. “Just be there to back me up. Okay?”

I nod and he heads upstairs, with me right behind him. My whole body is literally shaking, but I do my best to stay calm when he stops outside the door.

He puts his hand on the knob, then turns to look at me. “He’s going to come out fast. Ready?”

“Yes.” This time, the word comes out firm. Good.

I raise my gun and put my finger on the trigger, aiming at the door. Then he turns the knob. The door bangs into the zombie when Riley kicks it open, momentarily knocking him back. He recovers fast, though. Thankfully, Riley’s ready, and before the dead man can get two steps there’s a bullet in his brain. The body drops to the floor as the shot rings through my ears.

“Let’s check the other rooms,” Riley says.

We don’t find anyone else, and a close inspection of the place tells me this guy lived alone.

“Only men’s clothes in here,” I call from the closet.  

Why the hell he would need a house this size when he didn’t have a family is beyond me, but I’m glad. I don’t want to kill any more zombies today.

“Well shit,” Riley says behind me. I turn to find him frowning. “I guess that means no bikini for you.”

I laugh. It’s the first time I’ve laughed since our last morning in the school, and it feels nice.

“Well,” I say, crossing the room to him. “I guess I’ll just have to skinny dip.”

Riley wraps his arms around me and pulls me close. “Mmm. I like that idea. If it were up to me, you’d never wear clothes.”

“Not exactly the safest wardrobe choice during the zombie apocalypse.”

Riley tilts my face up to his and smiles. “Well, just around the house then.”

“It’s a deal.”

His lips cover mine and we stumble to the bed. Kissing. Undressing as we go.

For once, I don’t feel like we’re fucking to forget. This time is different. Like we’re doing it as a symbol of a new beginning. Starting fresh here in this beach house. Like maybe we do have a future ahead of us after all.

Only time will tell.