Jack's Christmas Wish (11 page)

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CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Lissa had never held a remote like this before. So many buttons and you had to hit two at the same time to kill the bad guys. It was complicated as hell. Now she knew what Rex was going through. Only her buttons were much easier to push and didn't require any kind of strategy, just repetition. But Rex was out of her life or at least she hoped so.

“Isn't it fun, Ms. Lissa?” Jack bit the end of his tongue concentrating.

“Yes, Jack this is fun. I enjoy spending time with you.”

Jack stopped playing all together. “Does this mean we're on a date?” He stared at her wide-eyed.

“Jack! You don't ask such things,” Derek chided.

“Jack, I think we're too far apart in age to date.”

He shrugged his shoulders. “I guess you're right. You are old.” He went back to playing video games.

Derek looked as if he were ready to explode. His fists were clenched and his face was red.

She chalked it up to him being embarrassed by Jack's statement. Not that she particularly enjoyed being called old. After all, twenty-eight wasn't old.

Lissa put her hand on Derek's knee to soothe him.

“Jack, why don't we wrap up the video games and get some lunch. I'm sure Ms. Lissa is hungry.” He took her hand and laced it through his.

“Okay, Daddy, I'm hungry too.” Jack turned off the machine and the TV. He hopped up and headed for the door leaving Derek and Lissa alone.

“No doubt he'll be in the kitchen in a matter of seconds.”

“He's such a good boy Derek. You're doing a fantastic job with him.”

He blushed. “I just can't keep a muzzle on his mouth.” He squeezed her hand lightly, brought it to his mouth and kissed it.

Her insides turned to jelly. She was a puddle of want and need around him. There was no denying she felt like she belonged with him. She caught herself dreaming of their wedding and a little sister for Jack to play with.

He seemed to read it in her eyes as he did quite frequently. “Lissa? What's going on in that pretty little head of yours?”

She turned her head away. She couldn't tell him she had been daydreaming of their future. She had no idea if they had a future. What if all these feelings wore off after they weren't new anymore? What if it's just lust? There were too many what if's to tell him anything. They had already confessed too much while making love. “Nothing.”

He huffed out a breath. “Alright, let's get something to eat.”

He sounded a bit annoyed. She didn't want this between them. She couldn't tell him what she had been dreaming of, but she could take his mind off of it. She leaned in and kissed his neck.

He smiled. “What did I tell you about starting something you couldn't finish?”

“Oh, I plan to follow through,” she gave him a sheepish grin.

“If Jack weren't here, I'd take you over my knee and spank your bottom for being a tease.”

“I'm no tease. I gave you everything you wanted, and then some. Don't you dare call me a tease.”

“I remember all too well and I loved your ‘and then some'. He made air quotes with his fingers.

There he went again with the love crap. Why did he insist on saying ‘love'? What ever happened to ‘like'. Rex had told her he loved her and now she was being threatened and stalked. Her father had told her he loved her then beat her and her mother and left them forever. Not that she particularly missed the bastard, but love was highly overrated. That particular word could destroy your life in a heartbeat. Love, being such a tiny word held more significance that any other word she knew. It was the happiest and the most hurtful. She didn't really ever want to hear it. She'd been trying to ignore all the times he'd said it, but it was beginning to be a habit. A habit she would have to address if it kept up.

“Are you hungry?”

“Yes. I'm starved. Breakfast was a long time ago.” She remembered breakfast very well. It was right in-between two bouts of sex.

“Yes. It was. What would you like for lunch? Anything you want.”

“Pizza would be good.” At least with him she had plenty of food to eat. Her cupboards were bare as well as her fridge, unless you counted condiments as food.

“Pizza, it is.” He held her hand and led her out of the room and down the stairs where Jack was waiting impatiently.

“Daddy? What are we having?” He sat in a chair, kicking his feet, swinging loosely close to the floor.

“We're having pizza. What toppings do you like Lissa? We love pepperoni with extra cheese.”

“That's my favorite too.” It really was her favorite. They had a lot in common. Maybe this could work.

“Then let's head out to Marcello's Pizzeria. They have the best pizza in Chicago.”

“Um, Derek, may I speak with you?” she went to the dining room and waited. She wasn't dressed for going out, her hair was a wreck, and she still smelled of sex. She needed to at least go home first and shower and change. He would certainly understand. Or at least she hoped he would.

Derek entered the room with a puzzled look on his face. “What's wrong? I thought you were hungry.”

“I am. I just need to shower and change my clothes first. I still smell like,” she lowered her voice to barely a whisper, “sex.”

He chuckled soft and low, a sound she was getting to like a lot. “Why don't we follow you to your apartment and let you do whatever it is you need to do and then we'll all go to Marcello's.”

“Oh thank you. I needed to hear that.” How would she ever be able to say goodbye to such a good man. She hoped she wouldn't have to.

He held his hand out to her, she took it and they headed back into the kitchen. “Jack, we're going to follow Miss Lissa home, then go for Pizza. Okay, buddy?”

“Okay, Daddy. Can I bring my hand-held video game?”

“Yeah, buddy, you can bring it.”

“Whoo hoo!” Jack jumped up from the chair and did an air pump, then took off for his room.

Derek grabbed both of Lissa's hands and leaned against the counter pulling her flush against him. “I've got you just where I want you. Always.”

She felt panic rising up in the back of her throat. Did he mean ‘always’ always? Or for right now ‘always'? “We need to get going before we end up having lunch for supper.” She pulled away from him, leaving a puzzled look on his face, but he didn't question her. For that she was deeply thankful.

She had almost made it to the door when she heard. “Why do you flinch at the word ‘Love'?”

Her shoulders slumped and she felt defeated. Like this was one endless nightmare of words. She would rather have dealt with the always comment. They didn't have time for this discussion. Jack would be back any second or at least she wanted him to be. She turned toward him and Jack bounded in the room, saving her. “I guess we'll talk about it later.” She smiled and left the kitchen, heading for her car.

Dammit, I fucked up. I should have kept my big mouth shut.
It wasn't lost on him the uncomfortable look on her face at his question. She clearly didn't want to talk about it. She had probably been hurt by some dumbass jerk. He didn't want to lose her though. He'd just taken a chance and failed. He thought she might walk if she feels like he crossed a line. Which, clearly he had.

He heard her car start and he rushed to get changed and follow her. He reached his room, grabbed a new shirt and his shoes and headed back down. By the time he reached his truck, she was long gone. “Come on, let's get going. Put your seatbelt on.”

“I know. I know.” Jack pulled his belt around him and fastened it with a click. He pulled out his video game and began to play.

Derek shook his head and then concentrated on backing out. He almost felt like he and Jack might be having lunch alone. Lissa might find some excuse to cancel. How could he have been so careless with his words?

“Daddy? Are we having a date with Miss Lissa? I mean, are you gonna kiss her? I'm okay with it if you are. I like her.”

“Jack why are so intent on me kissing her?”

“What's ‘intent’ mean?” He blinked up at his dad expectantly.

“Never mind what it means. Why do you want me to kiss her?” He was truly curious.

“Cause it means you love each other and she might be my new mom. I want her. She's pretty.” He looked back down at his video game and began pushing buttons.

He wondered if he should explain to Jack that kissing didn't mean love, but maybe it did. He felt so strongly about her it was almost crushing.

“Daddy? When we get there could I ride with her?”

“I don't see why not, but only if she's okay with it. Alright, sport?” He didn't quite know how to feel about Jack getting so close to her. What if they didn't work out and Jack got his heart broken. But then again, what if they did work out and Jack ended up the happiest he could be. So many what ifs hung in the air. So many insecurities he wasn't used to feeling. He was usually in control and he felt so out of control it was maddening.

“I really want her to be my new mom. I miss my mom, but Billy's mom said a boy needs a mother. So that's why I need a new one. Do you think she's an angel?”

He had a lump in his throat the size of Texas. It took him a few moments to get it under control enough to talk. “Of course, I think she's an angel. I think she watches over you.”

He nodded his head and went back to playing his game.

God, he missed Melody. He'd miss her every day of his life, but he ached for Lissa. Needed her like water or air. She filled him where there were holes in his life. She healed him and let him breathe again. He wasn't one for crying or showing those kinds of emotions, but he felt like it right now. He hoped like hell he hadn't lost Lissa by asking her why she shied away from the word love. She sure got out of there quick.

Just a few more moments and he would be at her apartment complex.

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CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Shit! The sonofabitch was there.
She pulled into her parking space right next to Rex’ car and got out dreading this encounter. This could be really bad with Derek and Jack on her heels. Maybe she could get rid of him fast. Not likely, but she had to try.

“Where in the fuck have you been? I waited here all fucking night and you were a no show. Have you been with another man? Are you cheating on me?”

She sighed, too damn tired to deal with his shit. “How could I be cheating on you when we're not dating? We have no relationship. When are you going to get that through your head?”

“What do you mean we have no relationship? I love you, baby.” He reached out to twirl her hair around his finger.

She pulled away disgusted. He dropped his hand by his side, but the look on his face said he was angry. He lifted his hand.

She flinched away preparing for a hit.

“What are you doin? I ain't gonna hit you. I told you I love you.” He caressed her face in his hand, making her nauseous.

“Let go of me. I don't want your love. I want you to go away and never come back.” She was thankful that the only parking space available was quite a ways down from her apartment. Maybe Derek wouldn't see Rex. She put the key in her lock and turned it. She just wanted to get cleaned up and have some lunch. She didn't need this headache.

“Babe, don't be that way. Why don't I come in and make love to you?”

She stared him up and down seeing an alcoholic mess standing before her dressed in raggedy blue jeans and a faded red cotton shirt with a hole in the hem. “Gross, I don't think so. Why don't you just leave? I don't want you here.”

He raised his hand again to waggle his finger at her. “Now I've tried to be, understanding and caring toward you, but you're going to force my hand now. I aim to have you again and I don't really care what I have to do to get it.” He reached out quickly and grabbed her breast.

She stumbled back, trying to get away from him, landing on her ass in her doorway.

He advanced toward her as she scrambled back. He was now in her apartment. She just needed to get to the phone and call the police. Hopefully, they would get there before he did something stupid. She bumped into the coffee table stopping her flee. “Stop right now or I'll call the police on you. You don't want to end up in jail do you?”

He stopped at her feet. “You wouldn't call the police on me, would you? Especially, after I've loved you so good?” Anger radiated from his entire frame. His face was red and his hands were shaking.

“You're right; you have loved me good. Let me get some rest and we'll be together tonight, okay?” She realized her tactics had to change. The angrier he got, the worse she feared it would be for her. He was almost certifiable after all.

“That reminds me, where the in the hell were you last night? I waited and waited and you were a no show. You better not have been with another man.”

He had practically growled the last sentence. She said the only thing that she could think of. “I was at my mother's helping my brother. I would have called you, but the phone was out. I forgot to pay the bill. Just let me rest for a while and we'll be together.”

“How long do you need? I've waited for a while now.” He stood with his hands on his hips and a sour look on his face. “I want to fuck you as soon as possible.”

She almost wretched at that statement. She could just imagine his sweaty nasty body on top of her fucking her and that's exactly what it would be, nothing more. It would be nothing like with Derek. With Derek she made love. Even though she didn't like the word; she knew it was making love. Right now, she needed to buy some time and get rid of him before Derek and Jack showed up. She pushed herself up and stood before him and stroked his cheek, even though it disgusted her. “I just need about six hours. Now go on home and take a nap yourself. You couldn't have slept that good in your car. I'll be right here waiting for you tonight, okay?” His hand covered hers pushing it into his oily face.

“I'll be back here in six hours and you better be ready. If you're lying to me, there'll be hell to pay.”

She didn't doubt it for a second. So she would be here with the police waiting for him to show. Right now however he needed to leave so she could get ready. “I promise now go on home.” He leaned forward and kissed her making bile rise in the back of her throat. How in the hell could she have ever gone out with this creep?
Because, I was horny, alone and depressed. And because beggars can't be choosers.