Just Crazy (10 page)

‘All right,' I say, but I don't move. I just keep standing near the phone.

‘Andy,' says Jen.

‘Okay, okay!' I say. ‘I'm going!'

‘That's not what I'm talking about,' she says, holding the receiver towards me, ‘It's for you.'

‘For me?' I say.

‘Yes,' says Jen. ‘Hard to believe isn't it, but apparently someone wants to talk to you.'

‘Who?' I say. ‘Who is it?'

‘Whom shall I say is calling?' Jen says into
the phone.

She smirks.

‘It's Lisa Mackney,' she says.

‘Lisa Mackney?' I say. ‘Are you sure?'

‘Do you want me to ask her if she's sure she's Lisa Mackney?' she says.

‘No!' I say, grabbing the receiver.

Lisa Mackney! Wow! She must have got my Valentine's card. I slipped it into her bag this morning. I wonder how she guessed it was from me. Maybe the perfume on the envelope gave me away. Well, it wasn't exactly perfume. I couldn't find any, so I sprayed it with the pine-scented air freshener we use in the toilet. It went all over my clothes and I stunk of it all day. I guess she must have noticed.

Jen is still standing beside the phone.

‘Mum!' I say. ‘Jen's listening to my call!'

‘As if I'd want to listen to one of your juvenile phone calls,' she says, walking out of the room. ‘I've
got
a life.'

‘Hello?' I say.

‘Hi, Andy — it's Lisa,' she says.

‘Oh, um, er . . .' I stutter, trying to think of something clever to say. ‘Hi!'

‘I hope you don't mind me calling you,' she says.

Is she kidding? It's only the best thing that has ever happened in the history of the world. But I can't say this. She might think I'm making fun of her. I have to act cool.

‘No,' I say.

I can't think of anything else to say. Which is funny because I've got so much to
say. I want to tell her how beautiful she is and how much I love her and how I wish she would be my girlfriend . . . but I can't find the words.

‘You're not busy, are you?' she says. ‘I can call back later if you'd like.'

What do I say to this?

If I say I'm not busy, she might think I'm some sort of loser with nothing better to do than just sit around the house. But if I say I am busy putting the bin out, she might think that I'm some sort of loser with nothing better to do than put the bin out.

I know honesty is supposed to be the best policy but in this case I think that dishonesty is even better.

‘No, I'm just taking a breather,' I say. ‘I've been doing a bit of weight-training . . . those five hundred kilogram weights can be pretty tough.'

‘You do weight-training?' she says.

‘Oh, a little,' I say.

‘A little?' she says. ‘Five hundred kilograms is a lot!'

‘Oh not really,' I say. ‘That's just a warm-up. It's the thousand kilogram weights that are really hard.'

I hear Lisa gasp.

So far, so good. I think she's suitably impressed.

‘Andy,' she says, ‘can you be serious for a moment?'

‘Huh?' I say. ‘I was being serious!'

Dishonest, but serious.

‘I need to talk to you,' she says. ‘It's important. I need to ask you a question. A serious question.'

‘Okay,' I say. ‘What is it?'

‘Did you send me the card?'

‘What card?' I say, playing dumb.

‘The Valentine's card,' she says.

‘Oh, that card,' I say, as casually as I can. ‘Yes, I did.'

‘I thought so!' she says.

There's an uncomfortable silence. I'm not sure what to say next.

‘I wanted to thank you,' she says.

‘That's okay,' I say.

‘No, I meant in person,' she says. ‘I was wondering if we could meet tomorrow morning? Before school?'

I can't believe it! She's practically asking me out on a date!

‘Andy?' she says. ‘Are you there?'

No, I'm not here. I'm somewhere between the Earth and the moon I'm so happy. I have to try to come back. I have to answer her.

‘Yes!' I say. ‘I'm here. Where would you like to meet?'

‘How about outside the park near the school?' she says. ‘About 8.30?'

‘Okay, Lisa,' I say. I'm keen to get off the phone now before I say anything stupid. ‘See you then.'

‘See you,' she says. ‘And, Andy?'

‘Yes?' I say.

‘It wasn't a joke, was it?'

‘What?' I say.

‘The card?'

‘No!' I say.

‘Good,' she says. ‘I'm really looking forward to it.'

‘Me too,' I say. I want to add, ‘because you're beautiful and I love you', but I can't actually make the words because my mouth is just opening and closing like a fish's.

I hang up.

I can't believe it.

The most beautiful girl in the world just rang up and asked me out on a date. What if she asks me to go out with her? Can she do
that? Can a girl ask a boy? I don't see why not. What if she asks me to marry her? Can we do that? Are we old enough? Will I need a ring? Or does the one who asks have to give the ring? What if she asks me to kiss her? I've never kissed a girl before. Not really. Not on the lips. How do you do that? I'd better go and practise on my mirror.

I don't walk back up the stairs. I float.

Lisa rang me.

Lisa rang me and asked me out.

She asked me out.

I have to keep repeating it so that I can believe it.

Lisa rang me.

She asked me out.

I didn't ring her. She rang me. She must really like me after all. After everything bad that's happened.

I float into my room and flop onto my bed.

She loves me.

She loves me.

I lie on my bed and think about tomorrow morning.

I can see it now.

I'm walking up the road to the park. I have a dozen roses in my arms.

Lisa is standing there, looking beautiful.

Everything around her is sort of blurry, like in one of those romantic photos they have in the front of photographers' shops, but she is in the middle in perfect focus.

She smiles and waves.

‘Hi, Lisa,' I say, in a deep, strong and confident voice.

She looks into my eyes.

I look into hers. I feel like I'm melting.

‘Hi,' she says in a voice so soft and beautiful that she sounds like an angel.

I give her the roses.

‘These are for you,' I say.

She looks at the roses. Her eyes fill with tears.

‘They're beautiful,' she sobs. ‘Just beautiful . . .'

‘Not as beautiful as you,' I say, putting my arms around her.

I bury my face in her soft perfumed hair — every strand shining like it's spun from the finest gossamer.

‘Oh, Andy,' she says, ‘you are so thoughtful . . . so wonderful . . . so gentlemanly . . .'

‘You forgot handsome,' I say.

‘And handsome,' she says.

‘And manly,' I say.