Authors: Kitty Margo
Midsummer's Eve (24 page)
“Didn’
t the sign
at the pool
say the hot tub closes at 10:00 pm?”
“Since when have you and I
obeyed rules? You weren’t worried about rules when you broke into Adam’s house
confiscating everything from phone numbers to a
disposable
camera
, now were you?”
She was slightly tipsy, I could tell. It was 3:30 in the morning and I didn’t see much chance of my over imbibed ass getting any sleep tonight. “Give me a minute to change.”
“Hurry up, I don’t intend to spend my
last night
at the beach sleeping.”
Minutes later, I slid down into the hot tub as the steaming churning water enveloped my body and lapped around my chin. It felt heavenly. Totally relaxed, I laid my head back and gazed at the stars trying to get my blurred thoughts together. I knew there was something important that I should remember. What was it? “Oh! Guess what?”
“What?”
“Guess?”
“Okay,” she said, gazing up at the stars and pretending to ponder. “Stephen only has one nut?”
“I wouldn’t know,
he might. Tammy is with a
white boy
.”
Her eyes flew open and she sat straight up so suddenly that her too skimpy bathing suit top was left hanging underneath her massive mammaries. “No way! Stop lying!”
“I am not lying. They were going to his room to watch a movie. I swear.”
“Uh huh, the only movie the
y’ll be watching tonight is that Kardashian girl’s
porn video.” She laughed
,
mirroring my thoughts exactly.
“I don’t imagine that sex tape would be any more titillating than the scene old boy is watching.” I pointed to the man a few feet away, drooling over his balcony rail, and then to her bare bosom.
Far from being embarrassed and hastily covering herself, as I would have, the exhibitionist sat up straighter and placed her elbows on the edge of the hot tub to make her boobs jut out even further and bounce merrily on the surface of the water. “Let him look. I’m sure the poor man rarely sees a set of girls like these.”
I half expected her to start squeezing her nipples and moaning for him and she probably would if I hadn’t shocked her with my tale of
Tammy and the White Boy
.
“How did he look?” She cut her eyes toward the man to assure that he was still partaking of the bountiful feast displayed before his eyes. He was.
“Um… well.”
“
Seriously? Did the poor thing look that bad
?”
“Worse.
Tammy
really
wants a rich boy
.
She’s tired of being a struggling single parent.
I think she wants to be you.
”
“
It won’t take her long to realize that wealth isn’t everything.”
“It helps though.”
“True.
Well, at l
east she’
s getting laid. That’s more than I can say for the two of us.” Then she glanced at the mesmerized man on the balcony. “I wonder if he would be interested in nibbling on a set of lips?”
I was almost positive that she wasn’t referring to the siliconed set either. “Surely, you aren’t going to ask?”
Laughing raucously, she slid under the water and adjusted her top. “He has seen enough to get his jollies.” She laid her head back and nudged my leg with her toe. “How are you doing, Eve? I mean really? None of your contrived bullshit.”
I thought about this a minut
e before answering. “I guess it’
s true what they say about time healing all wounds. I have actually been having fun this weekend. Who would have thought? Thank you, for insisting I come, Teri.”
“Anytime, sweetie. But next time
don’t be such a pain in the rear
when I suggest something. Just remember I know best.”
“I’ll remember. I find that each day it seems to hurt less and less. Since Sunday is their wedding day I hope to finally find closure.”
“Who knows? That yummy smelling Stephen just might be the man to help you forget about Adam, even if he does only have one nut.”
“
Afraid not.” I
really
hated
to burst her bubble and
inform her that the mighty
Eve
had struck out once again. “Unfortunately
,
I found out tonight that our Stephen not only lives
here, but is also very married.”
“
Good Lord! Must every
man you meet be a chronic liar?”
“
Sure seems that way, doesn’t it? And I never even got to find out if he had both nuts. Anyway, it’
s hot as Hades in here and I’
m getting out.”
“Me too. Let’s go to bed. I am totally exhausted from singing. It felt like I was p
erforming again and I had a blast
! This has been a weekend to remember.”
All of us would agree to that.
Ever mindful of the wedding back home, we lounged on the beach and waited until late in the evening to leave.
Tammy
left considering herself to
be on easy street the rest of her life with
Melvin
the trust fund baby
. It would seem he had the ability to do “the
betheth
thing” with such proficiency that he had succeeded in wiping
the entire Mexican population from her
feverish mind. He had promised to visit her at home the following weekend.
Mallory
was st
rongly considering leaving Antwan
, her live in boyfriend, for Tyrick. If she asked for my opinion, I w
ould urge her to stay with Antwan
. Anyone could tell that Tyrick was the very definition of a player.
Teri was still hearing the applause from last night’s karaoke performances ringing in her ears, humming 80’s songs and planning our next fun filled weekend on the fabulous Grand Strand.
“Teri gave an encore perfo
rmance after karaoke last nigh
t.” I couldn’t suppress a snicker
as I brought them up to speed on
her hot tub debut.
“
Mallory
,” Teri asked, “have you ever had your lips nibbled on while in a hot tub. It is the most divine experience.”
“Hell, no! It could give me a spontaneous orgasm just thinking about it, but you know most black men are afraid of water.”
They talked nonstop sex on the ride home while my mind, against my will, kept drifting to the Catholic Church. Today marked a new chapter in my life.
Today
Adam
would be a married man.
Eleven
O
n a Monday night in June
we were at
Tammy
’
s house for girl’s n
ight. Licking her tongue around the salted rim of her margarita glass, Teri asked, “
Tammy
, have you hear
d from the limber lipped Melvin
yet?”
“Hell, no! The lying
bathard
! Not a word!”
Tammy
chugged her margarita.
“I
with
I could get my
handth
around
hith
lying neck.”
“Typical l
ying male
.” I said.
“It’s a unfortunate fact
that the
world’s full of them.”
“
Lying bastard and she wishes she could get her hands around his lying neck, right?
What about you,
Mallory
?” Teri asked. “Any word from Tyrick?”
“Nope, and his phone has been disconnected.”
Mallory
bit into a taco and the sauce dribbled down her chin as she chewed with a vengeance. Then she drained her margarita. “Can you believe that shit?” She held her taco
in one hand and motioned toward
her camel toe
with the other. “Can you believe a man didn’t come back for more of this?”
“That’s a conundrum that will leave
me puzzled for months to come
,” Teri said
while salting her glass and pouring another drink.
“
W
hat about you, Eve
? Do you have any encouraging news from the dating front?”
I would swell up like a toad and my blood pressure would shoot out the roof of my head if I consumed that much salt. I love salt but, unfortunately, my body can only handle it in very limited doses.
“Nope, no news.”
“
Nope,”
Mallory
was quick to agree
on my behalf
. “She just sits at home watching CNN and waiting to see what the next disaster will be. How depressing is that?”
“I like to keep abreast of things,
Mallory
.
Is that a crime?
”
“
Oh,
Eve,
I’ve been meaning to ask you. W
hat does your mom say about
the world ending in
2012? Has she spoken
to the man upstairs
about it?”
“I’m sure she has, but she also quoted me
some
scripture. I don’t remember the exact words, but basically it said that not even the angels in heaven know the appointed hour that the end of time will come. So, if the angels don’t know, then she certainly i
sn’t going to give much credit
to some ancient Mayan predictions.”
“Good, if she’s not worried
then I’m not either. If anyone has a direct link to God, it’s your mom.”
“Amen,”
Tammy
agreed.
“Now
Teri,”
Mallory
said. “To answer your question about
Eve
’s love life or lack thereof, the answer is no. She never goes out. She refuses to even go to clubs with me. I guess we need another beach trip.”
“
I
choose
not to go out looking for men, simply
because I’
m not ready for a rel
ationship right now.”
I was happy to inform the thirsty trio of this, as I spooned huge dollops of sour cream on my taco. The tacos would be so much better with some diced tomatoes, but
Tammy
had never been
known to purchase a tomato. “I’
m going to be alone and learn to be happy with myself. I don’t need a man to complete me. That is unless George Clooney comes to his senses and decides to gi
ve me a call. What has
what
’
s her face got that I don’
t have anywa
y? Just one hour with him. That’s all I would ask for.”
“
If I could have on
e hour with anybody, let’s see,”
Mallory
said. “
It would have t
o be Snoop Dog.”
“Whatever for!”
Teri cried. “He is so tall and skinny. If I were going to do a rapper, it would have to be Jay-Z. He is seriously f
ine. Beyonce is one lucky girl.”
“Nope. Snoop Dog for me.”
Mallory
near salivated at the thought. “He looks so thuggish. And you know what they say about those tall skinny men? Trust someone who can s
peak from experience, it is all
true. What about you,
Tammy
.”
“Mario Cimarro
.
”
“Who’
s that?”
“
A
Thanith
thoap thar
. He is
tho
fine. But it would take longer than an hour
. I would want
the entire night
with that man.”
“
A Spanish soap star, right? W
ell, at least
Eve
is beginning to think about other men, even if George is slightly out of reach. And the part about her being alone for a while and learning to be happy with herself is the smartest
thing I have heard her say in…
well…
in forever.”
“
Thank you Teri. Your approval means so much to m
e.”
“Lying bitch.”
“
I wonder how
Adam
and
Chia
are doing.”
Tammy
had to ruin the evening
by pondering this question.