My Sister Lives on the Mantelpiece (20 page)

The dark face was a man’s. Sunya’s dad said something over his shoulder to a person I couldn’t see. He stared at the patio and the trees and the lawn and Sammy was growling and I was scared they’d let him out and he would find me in the bush.

Sunya’s dad didn’t see the card. After five minutes checking for burglars, he closed the curtains and turned off the light and Sammy barked for a bit but then he was quiet. I didn’t dare move and I stayed as still as I could, even though a twig was digging into my leg and I had pins and needles in my right foot. I stared at the window and I didn’t blink so my eyes dried up. I wanted Sunya to open the curtains and I wanted her to find the card and I wanted to make her happy ’cos she’s been so sad at school. I thought about her hand and my hand and how they had almost touched, and I wondered what would have happened if her mum hadn’t beeped the horn.

After about a million years, I thought it was safe to move. A church clock struck midnight as I crawled out of the bush and the branches snapped and the sleeve of my t-shirt ripped. When I picked up the card, it was all soggy. Snow had soaked right through the envelope. I was just wondering if I should leave it, or take it back home, or post it through Sunya’s letterbox, when I heard the door of the kitchen slide open.

I should’ve run or I should’ve hid or I should’ve dropped to the floor and covered myself in snow, but my body wouldn’t move. My back was facing the house so I had no idea who was there and I jumped when a wet tongue licked my hand. Sammy wagged his tail and it beat against my shaking leg. I counted to three and turned around and there she was. Her scarf was wrapped around her hair but not as tight as normal. It looked like she had just done it dead quick. She was wearing blue pyjamas and I could see her toes and they were tiny and brown and straight and they looked nice on the kitchen floor.

She stared at me and I stared at her but she didn’t smile. I said
Hello
and she put her finger to her lips to tell me to be quiet. I walked over to her and my arms felt too long and my legs felt too clumsy and my face felt too hot. I held out the card but she didn’t look happy like Jas had done. I said
This is a card especially for you and I made it out of paper and glitter
, just in case she didn’t realise how special it was. She didn’t say
Thank you
, or
Wow
, or squeak like girls do when they’re happy. She said
Sssh
and looked over her shoulder as if she was scared someone might see.

I forced it into her hand and waited for her to open the envelope. If she saw the snowman in the Spider-Man top and the snowman in the hijab, I knew she’d find it funny and smile. But she hid the card under her pyjamas and whispered
You have to go
. When I didn’t move, she looked over her shoulder again and said
Please just go. I am not allowed to be friends with you. My mum thinks you’re bad news
. I said
WHAT
and she put her hand over my mouth. My lips burned like they did on Halloween. A floorboard creaked upstairs. She said
Go
and pushed me away and she grabbed Sammy by the collar and pulled him inside. A light came on as I ran through the snow and Sunya closed the kitchen door. And this time when I jumped over the garden fence, I fell rather than flew and I hit the cold earth with a bang.

I
DROPPED MY
Coco Pops when Jas walked into the kitchen. I hardly recognised her.
You look like
—I started and she said
Shut it
and
Find me a pen
. It took her ten goes to write a message to Dad. One said
Please please please come
but that sounded desperate so the next one said
Be there or else
, which was a bit too threatening. After eight more attempts, she finally wrote
Dad. We have a surprise for you and would love it if you came to Manchester Palace Theatre today. Be there at 1pm for the show of a lifetime
.

I was more nervous than the most nervous person I can think of, which right now is the lion in The Wizard of Oz. My tummy had something bigger and scarier than butterflies inside it. Maybe they were eagles or hawks or something. Or now I come to think of it they could have been those monkeys with wings that kidnap Dorothy and take her to the witch that’s scared of water. Whatever they were they kept biting at my skin and swooping about not in a nice way. I was scared I’d forget everything and mess it all up so I kept running through the words and the dance moves as Jas wrote the message. That’s why she had to get rid of the sixth attempt at Dad’s letter. I knocked her pen with my leg as I did a high kick. For some reason that made me laugh and she looked annoyed and whispered
Bloody hell, Jamie
. And then she wouldn’t let me help her put the letter on Dad’s bedside table or set the alarm in his room for quarter past seven in case I was too noisy.

It was five o’clock in the morning and we were being quiet, even though there was no need. Dad doesn’t wake up in the middle of the day when the TV’s blasting in the lounge. But we still tiptoed about and our hearts went BOOM if one of us dropped something or spoke too loud. Jas was scared ’cos Leo was picking us up in his car and she didn’t want Dad to see and go mental. I was scared ’cos if Dad found out and stopped us from going then he’d never get back together with Mum. We’d sent her a letter on December 28th so it has had plenty of time to get there. And Mr Walker’s no excuse this time. The college is closed at Christmas. I made the competition sound really important and kept writing
Once in a lifetime opportunity
, which I had heard on TV, and
Come to Manchester to change your life
, which I stole from the letter, and
Please Mum I really need to see you
, which I just made up myself.

I can’t believe I’m doing this
Jas said as we went into the lounge to wait for Leo.
My horoscope said not to take a risk today
. She breathed shakily with her hand on her chest.
Let’s go through it one more time
I said, watching her fingers tremble. We whispered the words and did the dance moves but Roger had woken up and kept getting in the way. He was twisting his body around my feet so I couldn’t jump or stamp or run around Jas like I have to do in verse one. He was getting on my nerves but I was trying not to say anything ’cos I still felt bad for slamming the door in his face. When I tripped over his sparkly tail though, I lost it a bit. I leaned down and he looked at me all hopeful as if he was about to get a stroke. But instead of rubbing his fur, I picked him up and took him into the hall and shut him out of the lounge. He kept meowing at the door but I ignored him and eventually he got bored and ran off.

He’s here
Jas squeaked. A blue car pulled up outside the cottage. She fiddled with her new hair and said
Is it okay
. I said
Yes
, even though it looked strange. She must have dyed it brown last night and it was tied neatly in two short plaits. She looked so like Rose it was weird. I know they were identical and everything, but Jas just looks like Jas now. When I got into Leo’s car, it was like Rose’s spirit had come down from that cloud in Heaven and I missed the piercings and pink hair and black clothes. Jas was wearing a flowery dress, a cardigan and flat shoes with buckles, the last clothes Mum had bought her in London. I was still in my Spider-Man t-shirt ’cos Mum would be disappointed if I turned up not wearing it. I’d made it as smart as possible by wiping it with a cloth and fixing my sleeve with safety pins.

Leo raised his eyebrows when he saw Jas. She looked at him with her face all stressed and said
It’s just for today
and Leo looked relieved but said
You look cute
. Then Jas laughed and he laughed and I felt left out so I laughed, and then we were on our way. We drove fast ’cos the letter said it was first come first served and only one hundred and fifty acts would have time to go on stage. We sped through mountains and the sun rose as we climbed up hills and zoomed past farms and wiggled down country lanes. At one point we were driving right into the sun and the car was filled with this orange-yellow light and it was warm, like being inside an egg yolk or something. And everything looked beautiful and everything felt hopeful and all of a sudden I couldn’t wait to get on stage.

A girl with a clipboard came up to us when we arrived and said
What is your act
and Jas said
Singing and dancing
and the girl sighed as though it was the most boring thing she had ever heard. She gave us a number, which was one hundred and thirteen, and said
Be ready at 5pm to perform. You will get three minutes on stage, or less if the judges don’t like you
. I looked at the clock on the wall. It was ten past eleven.

There were loads of people in the waiting room. Clowns juggling fruit, twenty girls in tutus, five women with dogs that do tricks, nine magicians pulling animals out of hats and one knife thrower with tattoos slicing an apple with a blade that he held between his gold teeth. Me and Jas found two wooden chairs in the middle of the room and waited.

The time went fast. We ran through the routine twice an hour. There were so many people to watch and so much to think about that, every time I looked at the clock, the hands seemed to have jumped forward thirty minutes. I kept imagining Dad finding the letter by his bed and rushing into the shower and choosing a smart outfit for the show. I kept imagining Mum putting on a pretty dress and saying
It’s none of your business where I am going, Nigel
and buying us a Congratulations card at the petrol station on the motorway to Manchester. They’d probably see each other outside and grin and shake their heads and say
Kids
in a groany-proud way, as if they couldn’t quite believe we were brave enough to organise such a great surprise. They’d choose seats near the front and share an ice cream and enjoy all the one hundred and twelve acts before us, but then we would come on and Jas would look just like Rose and Dad would be happy that she’d gone back to normal and they’d both say
Wow
when I started to dance in my Spider-Man top.

This was the first nicest thing I thought about in the waiting room. The second nicest thing involved two sparkling eyes and two brown hands clapping harder than anyone as I sang my last note and raised my arms into the air.

The one hundred and fifth act went on stage. Jas’s leg started to twitch. She looked pale and young in her new clothes with her new hair and I got this strong urge to protect her. I put my arm around her shoulders, even though it was hard to reach, and she smiled and whispered
Thanks
. Her bones jutted out of her skin and I said
You should eat more
. She looked surprised.
You are thin enough
I said and her eyes filled with tears. Girls are strange. We held hands and waited.

One hundred and eight. One hundred and nine. One hundred and ten. There were only two acts left before us now. The waiting room was getting empty. It smelled of sweat and face paint and old food and it was boiling ’cos the radiators were on full blast. The music started for number one hundred and eleven. The old man had only sung five notes when his CD was turned off and the judges told him that he had no talent. The audience started chanting
Off Off Off Off
and Jas went green.
I can’t do this
she said, shaking her head and holding her stomach.
I really don’t think I can do this. My horoscope said not to take a risk
.