Reasons to Leave (Reasons #1) (23 page)

His expression became serious. “The danger only becomes an issue when you take stupid chances. I choose to stay alive instead.”

She pursed her lips for a moment. “I’ve never been on a bike,” she said thoughtfully.

“Never? Shame. I bet you’d look a damn fine sight in leathers.”

She couldn’t see his eyes, thanks to his shades, but she could imagine they were mischievous, rather like his half smile.

She scrunched her face. “Hmmm. I’m not so sure about that.”

He nudged her shoulder. “Come on… I’ll have to take you for a spin sometime.”

“Well, considering I’m going home in less than twenty four hours, I’m guessing that won’t be happening any time soon.” She immediately regretted her words.

His smile disappeared. “You have to keep reminding me, don’t you?”

“I’m sorry but it’s the truth.”

Suddenly, there was a loud scream and a commotion coming from a small cluster of rocks a short distance away where some of the girls had been sitting.

“Oh shit! What’s happened?” She rose and rushed over, closely followed by the rest of the staff.

“Miss! Miss! Jess has fallen, and I think she’s broken her leg or something!” a rather panicked girl shouted and waved her arms as the staff approached.

The girl in question had fallen from the rock where she was sitting and had landed badly. She was laying at the foot of the large boulder screaming in agony. Stevie glanced down at the poor girl and her stomach lurched. Her foot appeared to be facing in the wrong direction at the ankle and memories of her conversation with Mollie sprang to mind, creating the visual she’d been avoiding. Jason deftly made his way down to where Jess was and examined the girl’s leg. He tried to calm her down but she was more than a little distressed.

He called up to where everyone was gathered. “It’s a nasty break. Can someone ring for an ambulance please? Quick!” he shouted. Dorcas got right onto it. “Stevie, can you get down here? We can’t move her, but I think she’d feel better if you were here.”

With Harry and David’s help, she clambered carefully down to where Jess was sobbing and clinging to Jason’s hand as her friends looked on, some of them crying too. When she reached the girl, Stevie held her hand and stroked her hair, talking calmly and trying to reassure her that help was on its way.

“The ambulance will be about fifteen minutes. They’ve said not to move her but to make sure she is shaded and given water to keep her hydrated,” Dorcas called from above them. Water was passed down and a makeshift shade was constructed roughly using twigs and picnic blankets.

Fifteen minutes later, right on time, the paramedics made their way to where Jess was laying injured. She was given something to ease the pain, but agonised cries still rang out through the trees as her leg was straightened and fastened into a splint. Once she was strapped to a backboard, she was carefully lifted back up to where the ambulance had stopped.

“Am I okay to come with her?” Stevie asked as Jess clung to her hand.

“Of course…that’s no problem.” The paramedic smiled warmly. She climbed into the back of the ambulance and gave a reassuring wave to Jess’s friends and the rest of the staff.

“Call me when you have any news!” Jason called just as the doors were closed.

Chapter Eighteen

Day Seven Of Hell

It was three in the morning when Stevie finally arrived back to camp with Jess, who was now sporting a cast that reached from toe to thigh. Thankfully the break was clean and didn’t need surgery. She had been very brave, and her only bother seemed to be that her favourite jeans were now ruined thanks to her nasty fall and the need to cut them from her legs. Stevie helped her get into her dorm where her friends helped her change and get into bed. The poor girl was exhausted and desperate to get home to her mum. There had been talk of getting her home straight away, but after a call to her mum by one of the doctors at the hospital, it was decided that it would be easier if she could travel home with her friends, the proviso being that she was given ample room for her cast.

She arrived at Jason’s cabin without thinking. It was as if her heart and body were set to autopilot mode. Luckily, he had been expecting her and had left the door unlocked. She stripped down to her underwear and climbed into bed beside him. He enveloped her in his arms and mumbled in his sleep. The chance of a last night had been taken from them through no one’s fault. Overwhelmed by sadness at being held in his arms this way, she swallowed hard and tried to fend off the threatening tears. They had fallen asleep this way so many times when they were innocent teenagers—fully clothed and just holding each other. But this was different. This was the last time.

This was goodbye.

Tomorrow…or rather later today, she would say the word to him for the last time, to the man who she had given her heart to ten years ago and had lost it to all over again in the last week.

This was the end of Stevie and Jason.

“Love…my soul mate…love you,” came Jason’s mumbled voice as he nuzzled her hair. His words spoken whilst unconscious were her undoing, and the tears began to flow relentlessly.

****

Stevie awoke a few hours later. Jason’s arm was still wrapped around her, his chin resting on her head. She stretched to see the clock. It was seven already, and she still had to pack. Slowly and carefully, she lifted his arm, slid out of the bed, and placed it back down. She grabbed her clothes and hurriedly dressed as she reached the kitchen.

Dashing back to her cabin and managing to do so unseen, she began to pack her bag. The coach was picking them up at eight, and breakfast was being served early today. Once she had packed, showered, and dressed in the clothes she had left out, she made her way to grab a quick bite.

David made a beeline for her. “Hey, thanks for yesterday. I think it was best that you went. I’m just not sympathetic enough. Kids get sports injuries and I’m all
Oh, stop whining, you big wuss
, but something tells me that approach wouldn’t have quite hit the mark with Jess.”

She laughed. “No, I think you’re right there.”

“The coach has arrived anyway. The bags are being loaded up. We’ll be ready for the off pretty soon.” He gave her a knowing sad smile.

Dorcas thanked everyone for joining them at WFH and said that she hoped the accident on the hike hadn’t spoiled it for them. She was given a rousing applause, which seemed to set her mind at rest.

Jason was nowhere to be seen.

Once the kids were all accounted for and Jess was secured in her seat, David and Stevie thanked Dorcas and Harry for all their help.

Still no Jason.

David climbed aboard the bus and Stevie followed. Anger bubbled inside of her.
After everything that’s happened this week, he hasn’t even got the decency to come and say goodbye.
She stared out the window as the bus began to pull away. The kids waved frantically at Dorcas and Harry, shouting their thanks and goodbyes.

Suddenly, Jason appeared from the direction of his cabin. Her heart lurched in her chest. He was dressed only in his shorts and had nothing on his feet, despite the stones and dirt beneath them. He was running toward the retreating coach, waving his arms. A panicked expression across his face.

“Erm…Geoff…Geoff, stop the bus, mate.” David called to the driver. The bus came to a halt. He leaned over and whispered. “Stevie, I’m guessing it’s not me he’s after.” He gestured in Jason’s direction. She nodded and gulped down the lump of emotion lodged in her tight throat.

Shakily, she climbed down from the bus and walked toward Jason, who was now bent double resting his hands on his knees.

“God…I may…be fit…but…I’m no…fucking…
runner
…that’s for…sure,” he gasped as he stood there, and she mused on his ironic choice of words given their last parting.

She gave him a moment to catch his breath and glanced up at the back seat of the coach where David was just telling off the boys in the back for making kissy faces at them.

“Please…can we just talk for a second…out of view of the bus?” Jason’s breathing calmed. She glanced back at the bus where David was gesturing that she had five minutes. They walked toward a clearing in the trees where they would have more privacy.

Coming to a halt, she turned to face him, pointing in the direction of the coach. “I could lose my job if one of those kids says something about this.” Her anger returned. “You wait until I’m almost out of sight before you
bother
to turn up and
then
you make a huge scene and show me up!”

Jason held his hands up in surrender. “No…no…I set my alarm, but for some reason the battery died and so it didn’t go off. I was exhausted from waiting up for you until gone two this morning, and I overslept as a result of that, and I’m so…
so
sorry. But you
have
to know that I meant what I said when I asked you to stay. Please? Or…or go home and sort stuff out, and then come back here and we’ll work this out…please?”

His voice was filled with desperation, and she wanted to run into his arms and scream, “Yes!” at the top of her lungs.

But she just couldn’t do it.

Her mother needed her and long distance relationships just didn't work.

Pulling her lips in to stop them from quivering, she closed her eyes, trying hard to compose herself as so many conflicting emotions fought to escape. Eventually she spoke.  “Jason… We’ve been through this.
My
life is in London.
Your
life is here.
This
was temporary. We were
never
meant to be. We have to accept that now.” She opened her eyes, and he was standing too close for comfort.

His eyes widened. “Stevie, no. We were
always
meant to be. I just…I thought I could get over you…I was wrong…so, so wrong. I realise that now. We were
always
meant to be. Even when we were eighteen. I should
never
have left without you. I need to tell you something. Remember when we talked that time and I asked where you saw yourself and what was in your future?”

She frowned. “Yes…I was thinking about that yesterday.”

“Well, I was going to ask you to run away with me. I was on the verge of telling you everything. But I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t
do
that to you… It would’ve been so selfish of me. I didn’t want to drag you into the mess that was my life back then. What the hell did I have to offer you? But I
wanted
you with me, so, so badly. I’ve missed you so much I felt physical…
pain
, Stevie. You’ve got to believe me.”

Tears spilled over and cascaded down her face as her heart ached. “I do believe you. But back then, all I knew was that you were gone. I lost my heart and I lost the most precious thing in my life, Jason. I lost
you
.”

His lip trembled and his beautiful, warm, brown eyes filled with tears. One escaped, trailing a wet path down his unshaven face as he gazed pleadingly into her eyes and reached out to cling to her arms. “None of that matters now. I’m here. I had my reasons to leave, yes. And I
felt
I had no way out of things… L-like I’ve said before…I was…I was
lost
for a while
that’s all…and lost things
can
be found. This week has proven that. Please don’t leave. We need more time. Please don’t go.”

His voice broke as he tried to get the words out. He gazed down at her. “I can’t lose you again. Please...I love you, Stevie. I’ve never stopped loving you. Without you, I know now that I’m just a shadow. It was like I was walking through life searching for something to make me whole again and to fill the hole inside me where my heart should’ve been. What I didn’t realise was that
you
were it…
you
were my heart. There’s a reason I’m nothing without you. I know I was an arse to start with when you arrived, but that was…that was just self-preservation. The happiness I’ve felt in the last few days has far outshone anything I’ve felt in the last ten years. That’s got to count for something…it
has
to
mean
something…hasn’t it?”

She reached out and touched his damp face. “I’m so sorry, Jason.” The feeble sentence was all she could manage. She pulled away and turned to leave, but remaining where he stood he grabbed out for her arm again.

“Stevie, I’ll do anything you ask…
anything
.”

She turned to gaze at him standing there, looking desolate, and knew the very question she needed to ask, as much as it would hurt to hear the answer. “Jason, will you come to London with me?”