Red Hot Touch (8 page)

On that note, let’s take a good, long look at his goods. The more familiar you are with his hardware and how it works, the easier it will be to perform all sorts of sophisticated techniques to turn it on, keep it on, prevent it from exploding too soon, and more.

AN EYE-OPENING MAN-ATOMY LESSON

In spite of its apparent simplicity (and the questionable nicknames attributed to it), a man’s Mini Me is much more complex than most people have probably ever considered. For instance, while the full monty is usually seen as one giant homogenous hot spot, the reality is that certain points are sensitive, others less so, and still others are so touchy that only the lightest finger wiggle will set them loose. Here’s a rundown of the areas you’ll encounter, as well as the best way to handle them.

The Shaft

We think it’s pretty self-explanatory what part of the penis we’re talking about here, and it’s probably the first thing you grab once you’ve peeled off his skivvies. That said, for all the time you spend with your hands wrapped around this pillar to pleasure, it’s actually one of the
least
sensitive areas of his anatomy. That doesn’t mean you should steer clear, merely that you’re better off concentrating on bolder strokes. In fact, go ahead and gently slap, stretch, and squeeze it to see how he likes it. Once you feel like breaking out some subtler handiwork, inch your grip up to our next point of interest.

THE MALE GENITALS

The Glans

Usually referred to as the head of the penis, this acorn-shaped area is like the penthouse suite as far as fun is concerned. Since it contains hundreds more nerve endings than the shaft, it’s highly sensitive—even the lightest caress can send shivers down his spine. You should take care not to polish this apple
too
vigorously, since it can easily become overstimulated, resulting in numbness or pain rather than pleasure.

THE UNCIRCUMCISED PENIS

The Corona

This is the ridge where the glans meets the shaft. Many of the nerve endings in the glans are concentrated along this loop, so it’s totally worth lingering on this lip. Certain points on its circumference may be especially sensitive; to find out where, treat the corona like a clock face and make the rounds, rubbing every hour, on the hour. You may find six o’clock of particular interest (more on that next).

The Frenulum

If the penis has a sweet spot, this is it. Located on the underside of the corona, this point is a powder keg of pleasure that can be ignited with a mere pinky wiggle. In our classes, we have found that only half of our male students have a clue that this extra-sensitive area exists—and only a handful of them know it’s called the frenulum. If your partner’s in the dark, how grateful do you think he’ll be if you make the introduction?

The Foreskin (If He’s Uncircumcised)

Men who aren’t circumcised naturally have more for your hands to please: the foreskin, an extra layer of tissue that covers the glans like a skullcap. Encountering one for the first time can be a little baffling, but this perplexing carapace comes with some unique arousal-inducing benefits. For one, the skin here is rich in a special type of nerve receptor called Meissner’s corpuscles whose sole purpose is to feel pleasure, period. Secondly, by moving the foreskin up and down, you can stimulate both the glans and its covering, doubling his pleasure. Once the penis becomes erect, the foreskin will retract, at which point you may be able to treat the penis similarly to circumcised models. Still, to be on the safe side, ask your partner for a little direction.

The Testicles

Given that future generations of the human race depend on these two little sperm factories, it’s understandable that a man’s family jewels should be handled with care. Yet many people make the mistake of avoiding toying with the twins entirely, which is a shame since his cojones contain tons of nerve endings that are starved for some attention.
Many men will enjoy it if you lightly caress the testicles with your fingertips, cup them in your palm and jiggle, or even pinch and pull on the scrotum—the pouch of skin that encases this valuable merchandise. The only two things you
should never
do is twist (which will pinch the vas deferens, the tube through which sperm travels into the penis) or squeeze. A good rule of thumb is to treat the testicles like eggs you don’t want to break. So start gently, check in with him for feedback, and if at some point you feel his testicles contract and rise toward his body, congratulations! That means he’s enjoying what you’re doing. Take note and continue.

The Perineum

This area between the testicles and the anus, also quaintly known as the “taint” since “’tain’t one or the other,” is a largely untapped erogenous zone that you should start cashing in on pronto. Buried beneath this spot is the prostate, a supersensitive gland. You can jump-start all kinds of hijinks when you press on the perineum and turn on the prostate. The prostate can also be stimulated via a more direct means that we’ll discuss next.

The Anus

The anus is often treated like the bad kid on the block that shouldn’t be played with, but those who hazard this side of the tracks will find its bad rap is largely unmerited. Next to his johnson, this area is decked out with more nerve endings than any other area of the body. And if that weren’t enough of a reason to explore, about three inches inside this aperture you’ll encounter a walnut-shaped bump—the prostate gland, a wellspring of sensitivity that can set off even more sparks.

HANDLING HIS ULTIMATE HOT SPOT: SOME GUIDELINES TO KEEP IN MIND

In the next chapter we’ll discuss specific techniques to try on the above-mentioned man parts that will blow his hair back and leave him begging for more. But before we get to that we feel it’s best to start off with some overall pointers. Giving great hand is not as simple and self-evident as it is often made out to be. Heed this advice, and you’ll avoid a few common misjudgments and leave his peter very impressed.

Don’t Expect a Raging Hard-on the Whole Time

Boners are funny that way: Sometimes they pop up with no encouragement whatsoever (and when they’re least convenient to deal with); other times every trick in this book won’t inspire an inch of interest. Either way, don’t assume you’re wasting your time if the tent pitching is taking a while, or if his Maypole rises but then starts losing altitude. While people are conditioned to think that erection = arousal and use it as a barometer of their success in the sack, as any guy will tell you, the penis truly has a mind of its own. So don’t take its actions (or lack thereof) too personally.

Meanwhile, remember that firm or flaccid, his love rod still contains the same number of nerve endings that can register on his Richter scale; some men (especially older gents) can even ejaculate when they’re soft as a sundae. In fact, many of the genital massage techniques we teach are best performed when his hard-on is anything but. No matter what, if you find yourself face-to-face with one that refuses to roar to life, probably the worst thing you can do is stop and ask, “Is something wrong?” Penises don’t respond well to pressure, so
your question will only feed your partner’s mounting performance anxiety and keep liftoff in limbo. Instead ask, “Does this feel good, or would you rather I try something different?” Your partner may steer you in a better direction, or reassure you that while things might not look like it, he’s having a grand old time. Either way, eventually things should start looking up.

Request a Hands-on Demo

If you have never watched your guy masturbate, now is the time to ask (or, if you have already, appeal for a repeat performance). Every johnson is a little different, and the only person who knows a certain model’s particular quirks is the guy behind the wheel. To get the inside scoop, you could of course ask him to pontificate about his likes and dislikes. But actions speak louder than words, so ask him to
show
you how it’s done and you’ll get a real eye-opener.

Understandably, some men might be bashful about performing this typically private act in front of you. If he’s reluctant, suggest a two-way performance where you both masturbate in front of each other; few red-blooded men would be able to resist such an offer. Another alternative is to put your hands on his privates, layer his hands on top of yours, and have him guide you through the movements. However you conduct your tutorial, you’ll learn tons about where and how he likes to be touched that you can file away in your memory bank for future use.

That said, don’t copy his actions completely. In case you didn’t know this, most men (even those in relationships) masturbate far more than you’d care or dare to imagine, and for all kinds of reasons—because they’re horny, because they’re bored, because there’s a commercial break during the NBA playoffs—all in all, just about
any occasion can be seen as an opportunity to jack off. As a result, many men don’t raise the bar very high when tugging their wares—and it’s up to you to show him how good it can get. So if you do get to watch him masturbate and are a little surprised to see his hand pumping at breakneck speed, that doesn’t mean you should follow his lead to a tee. Consider his actions a general framework, within which it’s your right and duty to add your own personal touch.

The Penis Can Withstand Some Pretty Rough Play

Ever seen Penis Puppetry? It’s a performance where guys get up on stage, whip out their “puppets,” and start bending, squashing, and all but tying them in knots to form hamburgers, Windsurfers, or whatever else they can imagine fashioning for their own and others’ amusement. Our point isn’t that you should book tickets to the show (although you should because it’s quality entertainment), but to prove to you beyond a doubt that a man’s genitals are sensitive but by no means delicate. That’s right, his genitals can be folded like origami, flattened like pancakes, and stretched like Silly Putty, no problem (well, maybe that’s pushing it a bit, but you get our point).

While a man’s genitals are especially pliable while in repose, hard-ons can also be gently bent (at the base) without adverse effects. Even the testicles aren’t as fragile as most people think. So if you’re treating his genitals with
too
much loving care and concern, you could be shortchanging your partner out of a range of lovely sensations. So don’t be afraid to push that penis around, test the boundaries, and see what
he
tells you is too much, rather than trying to second-guess where his pain threshold lies. As long as you proceed slowly and check in with him, you’ll be amazed where your creativity may take you, and how much he’ll enjoy it.

Balance Pace with Pressure

Sure, men may act like they could never get enough of you rubbing right where it counts. Still,
too
much stimulation will numb his nerve endings. To avoid going overboard, respect the yin and yang relationship between pace and pressure: The tighter your grip, the slower you should go; the looser your grasp, the faster your fingers should fly. And if you have been tending to the highly trafficked head and shaft for a while, give it some downtime to recharge and move on to another area of his anatomy. Play with his balls, stroke his pecs, or even (here’s a novel idea) head all the way up and give him a long, lusty kiss. Men dig the romantic, mushy stuff much more than they’ll ever let on.

Sex and Drugs Don’t Mix

Whether he’s had a few beers, a bong hit, or something stronger as a prelude to your evening à deux, just know that while most of these substances may loosen inhibitions, they can also slow circulation (which is why, as you have probably noticed, men have a hard time getting it up when they’re drunk). Smoking also stems blood flow, and even prescription medications—most notably antidepressants—can throw a wrench in his ability to get it up, keep it up, or move it on out. If he suspects his meds are slowing him down, he can talk to his doctor about switching to a drug with fewer sexual side effects.