Savvy Girl, A Guide to Etiquette (18 page)
Read Savvy Girl, A Guide to Etiquette Online
Authors: Brittany Deal,Bren Underwood
Tags: #table manners, #thank you notes, #social etiquette, #entertaining, #dating etiquette, #thank you note etiquette, #bridesmaid etiquette, #maid of honor etiquette, #how to shine as your best self, #tech etiquette, #modern manners, #win friends, #etiquette expert, #proper social behavior, #respect, #social conduct, #charming, #etiquette advice, #good manners, #wedding etiquette, #move on over Emily Post, #polished, #self-help, #etiquette guide, #build confidence, #how to be your best self, #guest etiquette, #manners, #hosting, #host etiquette, #elegant, #being a great guest, #nice people, #social media etiquette, #the power of appreciation, #Etiquette
DO
tell fun stories. But keep them short and to the point, since too many details make people’s eyes glaze over.
DO
be wary of oversharing. Sharing deets about your personal life will help you become closer to your friends, but know when to leave out the intimate details of your recent breakup story. Those kind of gory specifics are better left with your besties.
DO
prep yourself. If you’re headed to an event where you know you’ll be interacting with new people, have a mental list of current events and topics you’ll feel confident chatting about to anyone, anytime.
DON’T
interrupt. Cutting off someone’s story makes them feel like you just deflated their party balloons. People love to tell their stories, and when a story gets interrupted halfway through, it’s equivalent to saying, “Hey, your story is a bore, and I have one that is way better, so let’s get back to me.”
DON’T
one-up someone. While you might want to follow someone’s story with your own personal experience, try not to be a one-upper with a bigger and better tale to tell.
DON’T
hog the spotlight. Of course, conversations are a two-way street, which means you can (and should) shine. However, try not to dominate the conversation and make the entire interaction about yourself.
DON’T
correct someone’s grammar. I know this may seem obvious, but if you are an English teacher and it sounds like nails on a chalkboard when someone says “I’m good” instead of “I am well,” just let it ride. This goes for pronunciation, too (unless it’s your name they’re mispronouncing). It’s a party, not English class.
DON’T
focus on just one person in a group. While you might be enamored with one person in a group of people who are chatting, give everyone attention by engaging them in the conversation and asking them questions. For example, if you and Person Number Two are talking about how you both love Italy, ask Person Number Three if she has been on any recent trips. Be inclusive and loop people into the conversation.
[
BRITT:
Interrupting is something I have to continually remind myself not to do. But as we all know, interrupting is rude because it shows that you care more about your story than listening to the other person finish theirs. If you catch yourself interrupting (mini high-five for being self-aware!), apologize and ask the person to please continue with their story. They will be thrilled that you are still interested in hearing all of the details—and that you’re savvy enough to know it’s rude to cut their story short.
]
You know the old phrase: “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” Most of us have probably engaged in trash talk, and I’m sure at one point or another we’ve all had others talk about us behind our backs. Pretty rotten, right? So why do we do it?
The reasons don’t matter as much as putting a stop to it. Talking poorly about others won’t make us any smarter, prettier, or better. In fact, it makes us look bad (nobody likes a Mean Girl). Plus, don’t we all have more important things to talk about?
