She's the One: COunting on Love, Book 1 (33 page)

He just didn’t want to have to worry about hurt feelings when he didn’t follow up on any of this.

“You can have all the muffins if you keep answering the door,” he said to Cody.

“No way, man. Every time I open the door, the girl on the other side is visibly disappointed. My ego can only take so much.”

Ryan sighed and went to the door. But when he pulled the door open, Amanda was on the other side.

“Hi,” she said simply.

“Hi.”

She looked amazing.

She also had a big paper bag with her.

“What’s up?” he asked, already knowing what she was going to say.

“I told you I’d be back.”

“Amanda—”

But she stepped forward and he had to move back to avoid her pressing up against him. He couldn’t touch her. He’d never stop if he did.

“This doesn’t have to be difficult,” she said, moving past him and into the condo.

He stayed in the doorway, breathing deeply in and out, using the relaxation mantras he knew so well—to no avail.

He finally followed her inside, finding her in the kitchen with Cody.

“I’ll send the casserole to Nate—he and Michael can use that for sure. You want to take the cookies to the station?”

She was putting the food from the other girls into various plastic grocery bags.

“You’re getting rid of my food?” he asked.

“Yes,” she said simply, sliding the pan of cinnamon rolls into a bag.

“Why?”

“There are plenty of single guys who would really appreciate this stuff,” she said. “You don’t need it. You have me.”

He sighed. He wanted to have her, that was certain. And he liked that she was a little jealous. But he didn’t have her.

Fuck.

He watched her unpack the paper bag she’d brought with her, storing fruit, sandwich meat and a bowl of what looked like salad in his refrigerator.

Part of him loved that she was clearly trying to take care of him. But part of him realized that she simply couldn’t help it. Like her sisters, like her brother, like her student Jill, Amanda couldn’t rest until everyone was okay. Until she
made
them okay.

He took a deep breath. “Amanda.” When she turned to face him, he said simply, “
Huckleberry
.”

She frowned. “I just got here.”

He didn’t respond. The rule was they just had to say the word. She knew that. And he knew she’d respect that.

She huffed out a breath. “Fine.” Still she gathered up the sack with the casserole and some of the cookies in one hand and the plastic container of soup in the other. “Olivia loves chicken soup,” she told him.

“Tell her I hope she’s feeling better,” he said seriously.

“I will.” Amanda stopped in front of him, went on tiptoe and planted a kiss on his lips. “I love you.”

Then she left.

Ryan had to clench his hands at his sides and breathe deep to keep from going after her. As the front door shut, he looked at Cody.

“Seriously?” his friend asked.

He shrugged. “It’s complicated.” That was the understatement of the year.

“Life often is,” Cody said.

“It doesn’t have to be.” He knew how to keep things simple and tranquil.

And that was what he wanted.

He was pretty sure.

“You’re an idiot,” Cody said, grabbing one of the remaining cookies from the plate on the counter. “I’ll see you later.”

“You’re leaving me now?” Ryan asked. He wouldn’t hate it if his buddy stayed. It would help keep his mind off of Amanda. Maybe.

“Gotta get to work,” Cody said, clapping him on the shoulder as he passed. “I’m sure Amanda will send someone else over, though.”

Ryan was sure she would too.

But eventually she’d get tired of this. It would take a while, he knew, but eventually she’d figure out that he wasn’t worth all the trouble.

Nate was the next one to show up.

He was able to fill Ryan in on every detail of Emma’s injuries, surgery and recovery.

Unfortunately.

Ryan couldn’t quite bring himself to shut his friend up though. It seemed that Nate needed to talk about it. It was clear that putting the pieces of Emma’s pelvis back together had shaken the surgeon.

“But she’s good now?” Ryan asked, needing to hear it as much as Nate needed to be reminded.

Nate took a long draw on his beer, then nodded. “Yeah. She’s sore. And pissed. But she’s going to be fine.”

“Pissed?” Ryan asked, feeling like a lead ball settled low in his stomach. It was his fault Emma was hurting. Of course she was pissed at him.

“I told her she’s gotta take it easy. No dancing…and no yoga for a while.”

Ryan frowned. Emma wasn’t going to be able to work for a while because of him. Dammit. He wondered if she had any short-term disability insurance. If not, he was going to have to tap into his savings account to help her out. And somehow do it without her knowing. Emma Dixon was not the type to take charity.

“She can’t possibly really
want
to do those things,” Ryan said. “She’s gotta know that she has to heal and rehab.” Emma was stubborn as they came, but she wasn’t stupid.

Nate shook his head. “She knows she can’t do it. She’s hurting too much right now to truly want to. But it really rubs her wrong for
me
to be telling her what she can and can’t do.”

Ryan relaxed a little at that. He could imagine Emma arguing with Nate simply because it was Nate.

“How long will her recovery be?”

“Six weeks for the bones to heal,” Nate said. “Then a few more to really rehab. But she can do a lot in therapy even right now. And I did a hell of a job so she’ll heal really well. Plus, she’s strong, in good health. She’s got a lot going for her. She just has to take the rehab seriously and not mess around.” He frowned as he said it.

“She’ll take it seriously,” Ryan said. Again, Emma wasn’t stupid. And if she did mess around, he’d kick her butt.

“Then she’ll be fine. She’ll get back to normal.”

Ryan let those words really sink in. She was going to be okay.

Nate stayed for another hour, then had to get home to check in with his son, Michael. “You’re good?” he asked on his way to the door.

“Yeah.” And basically he was. He felt like shit about the accident, but the girls were going to be okay and it seemed that most of his friends were still speaking to him.

“Okay, call if you need anything. Or come over if you get bored.”

That was a real possibility. He could play video games with Michael or something.

“Thanks. I will,” he promised.

He managed to make it through the rest of the evening on his own. Cody called to check in, as did a couple other guys from the team. He called his mom to fill her in, but ended up leaving a voice message. He made dinner. Watched TV. Went to bed early.

As the numbers on the clock changed slowly—too slowly—on his bedside table, he finally admitted that he had been expecting Amanda again.

But she didn’t show up.

Until the next morning.

He was up and finishing his coffee when the doorbell rang.

He knew who it was before he even turned the knob.

“Hi,” she said, as she had the morning before.

“Hi.” God, he wanted her with every fiber of his being. He didn’t just want to pull her into his arms and strip her of the silky red blouse and black pencil skirt. He also wanted to make her pancakes and ask her how she was and find out what her day was going to be like.

He should tell her to quit sending babysitters, but he couldn’t. That was Amanda. She took care of people, and he was weak enough to admit that being someone she took care of felt damned good.

But he managed to send her away. Somehow.

Of course, she came back the next day. And the next day.

On the fourth day, he propped his shoulder against the doorjamb, crossed his arms, and drank in the sight of her. God, she was amazing.

“How’s Olivia?” he asked.

“Good. The doctors say she’s perfect. I still don’t like the idea of her being home alone all day though.”

“You’ve been taking off work?” Every day she’d shown up on his doorstep she looked gorgeous, like she was ready for the office.

“Just the first day. Everyone else has been taking turns.” She shrugged.

He frowned. “You didn’t think to ask me?” He’d been off since the accident. He had to be one hundred percent at his job, and the doctor had recommended a few days off before he’d sign the approval for him to return to duty.

She waved her hand. “Oh, it’s been fine.”

“Who’s she hanging out with today?” He’d texted her a couple of times and she’d said she was feeling good, but he hadn’t realized they’d all been taking turns—and missing work—to keep an eye on her.

“Doesn’t matter. I’m just going into the office for a little bit. I’m meeting with Jill and a couple of her friends.”

“Is Jill still having trouble?”

Amanda waved her hand again. “It’s fine. She’ll be good.”

He really wanted to let her in. But he couldn’t. He was barely resisting falling at her feet and confessing his undying love. Inside his house, closer to his bed, and he’d never let her leave.

“So, who’s with Liv today?” he asked again.

“She’s going down to the station for a little while.”

“The fire station?” he asked.

“Yeah.”

“She’s back to work?” That was a good sign.

“No, just hanging out.”

“Amanda? Why didn’t you ask me to spend time with her? I make the most sense. I’m off work anyway.” It occurred to him to be concerned, even hurt, that she might not trust him with Olivia after what happened. But he knew that wasn’t it.

She did that wavy thing with her hand again. “You don’t need to do that. It’s fine.”

He grabbed her wrist. “Stop saying everything is fine.”

She sighed. “I don’t want you to worry about all of that.”

“‘That’? You mean the people you care about? The people
I
care about?”

“It’s all covered.”

Yep. He knew exactly what she was doing. She was protecting him—from the stress, the not-great stuff that he’d told her he didn’t like.

“Amanda.”

“Are you going to let me in?” she asked. “I brought the pirate slave girl outfit that you wanted.” She held up a shiny black bag from the costume shop.

“You bought a pirate slave girl costume?” Well, he could probably let her in for a little while…

“And a naughty secretary outfit.”

Yeah, he could definitely find some time—

Then he shook his head. No. He saw what she was doing. He was the guy to play dress-up with while everyone else—especially Amanda—took care of the serious stuff.

Ryan straightened. “I’m going to the station.”

“What? Why?”

“To get Olivia. We’ll hang out. Her being down there is ridiculous.”

“Well, um…” She glanced over the shoulder.

Ryan rolled his eyes. “She’s in the car?”

Amanda looked a little sheepish. “Yeah.”

He rubbed the back of his neck, half frustrated and half convinced that she was his favorite person in the world. He looked into her eyes. No, he was
fully
convinced she was his favorite person.

“What if I’d let you and the pirate outfit in?” he asked.

“I knew you wouldn’t.”

“But you still brought the costume?”

“Costume
s
,” she corrected, leaning in and setting the bag inside his front door.

Where it would tempt and taunt him.

He pulled his gaze from the shiny bag and cleared his throat. “You were sure I wouldn’t let you in?”

“Not
this
time,” she said. “But Liv has the keys with her in case I’m not out in twenty minutes or so.”

He shook his head. “Let’s go get her.” He started to move past her.

“Are you sure?”

He turned. “Don’t.”

“Don’t what?”

“Protect me this way.”

“But you didn’t ask for the responsibility and craziness—”

“I want it. Period.”

She stared at him, but finally gave him a nod. He rounded the corner of his garage. Olivia was sitting in the car, her elbow propped on the window, twirling her hair with one finger. Her face lit up when she saw him though, and she climbed out quickly.

His stomach clenched for a second, but the moment she was within reach he pulled her in for a hug. “I’m glad to see you, Liv.”

She wrapped her arms around him too and squeezed him back. “I’m okay, Ryan.”

He took a deep breath and let go of her. “That makes me better too.”

She smiled up at him and he looped an arm around her shoulders, looking to Amanda. “She’s in good hands.”