Temptation (8 page)

“Yeah, I’m better than before. Thank you for bringing me here. I honestly don’t know what would have happened if you hadn’t stopped.”

“YA dumayu, chto eto kak sud'ba vmeshalas' v.”

“What? I have no idea what you’re saying. Is that Russian?”

He chuckles and says, “Sorry. I forget sometimes. Yes, it’s Russian.”

“So, you’re from Russia? What are you doing in Tennessee?”

“Yes. I’ve been in this country for about ten years, or more now. I have a business in Nashville.”

“What sort of business?” I don’t know what makes me start asking him so many questions. I feel the need to get to know him, and he’s actually easy to talk to. Strange as that may be. I think again, maybe it’s the drugs making me act this way. I’m normally shy around strangers.

“I own my own club.”

“Like a night club? Where all the young adults go these days to get drunk and have one night stands?” I say jokingly.

“Something like that.”

“Can I at least know your name? I’d like to thank you properly for saving me.”

He moves the only chair in the small room and places it beside my bed. He takes my hand again, and it makes my stomach flutter. I shake it off as the baby moving around and for a second I think maybe the drugs I was given is making her high. I laugh at myself and my savior gives me a look. “Sorry. I was just wondering if the drugs they gave me is making my baby girl high.”

He surprises me when he smiles and his hard features change. He starts laughing and I can’t help but join in. His laugh is infectious. I would like to hear him laugh and smile more. It seems unreal how he can look even more gorgeous when he smiles. I realize, I have to be careful around him. I cannot let my guard down around him. I have to protect myself and my baby girl. Hearing his laugh and knowing it sounds like music to my ears worries me. I shouldn’t like the sound of his laugh and I become fully aware of how I could easily fall for him. Call me crazy, but there’s something about him that I want to know more about. I slowly turn my head away, feeling my face heat up. I have to stop thinking about him this way. I’m sure after today, this will be the last time I ever see him.

We stop laughing and again I meet his dark green stare. He looks so long at me that I start to squirm at bit. “Your name?” I remind him.

He lets go of my hand and holds his out. “I’m Viktor. Viktor Matvei. It’s my pleasure to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you as well, Viktor Matvei.” I take his hand and we shake. It seems as though we’ve went about our meeting backwards. He holds my hand for longer than necessary, but I don’t mind. I stare into his dark green eyes, trying to figure out what’s happening here. Is it just me or does he feel the same way? He grins, as if knowing what thoughts are running wild in my head. Slowly uncurling his fingers, he lets go of my hand and leans back in his chair, his gaze never leaving mine. I have to look away, knowing if I don’t I’ll get lost into his intense gaze. I place mine on my belly, rubbing it not really knowing what to say. Viktor has gained a great deal of information about me since he stayed while the nurses asked their million questions. I don’t know if they thought he was the father, or a family member. They rushed through everything so quickly they didn’t say much about that part.

“Is there someone you would like me to call? Perhaps the father?”

“Oh, no. He’s out of the picture. Malcolm’s the reason why I went into labor early. At least I’m blaming him for it. If he hadn’t …” I let my voice drift knowing if I say it, I’ll start to cry. I can already feel the tears coming. I clear my throat feeling a lump forming.

“Malcolm? What’s his last name?”

I frown thinking Viktor’s question is a bit odd. “Daniels. Why? Do you know Malcolm?”

He shakes his head as he says, “No. Sorry I have to step out for just a second. Are you going to be alright?”

“Yes. I don’t think it could get any worse.” I tell him with a smile devoid of happiness. He nods and walks out the door. I let go of the breath I’m holding. I look around the room, hating how alone I feel all of a sudden. I want Viktor to come back, but maybe it’s for the best he left. I can’t help but feel a sudden urge to cry thinking he might not come back. I rub the bridge on my nose figuring I should probably let my parents know what’s going on while he’s gone. I don’t know how I’m going to explain this. How do I tell mom and dad that the father of their grandchild just up and left? I sigh and reach over to the hospital phone. I sigh again as I dial their number, not wanting them to worry. I know they will. I wasn’t supposed to go into labor this early.

I nearly lose it again when I hear my mom’s voice. “Hello?”

“Mom? It’s me. I … I’m at the hospital.”

“Oh, honey! Are you alright? How’s the baby?”

“I’m okay, mom. But, I think you and dad should come soon. The nurse says I’m going to have a baby today.”

“Oh, honey, are they sure? It’s too soon.”

“Trust me. I know, and I’ve told them. The nurse told me I’m six and a half centimeters dilated. I think it’s happening whether or not I want it too.”

“Alright, Ava. We’re leaving right now. We’ll be there soon. I love you, honey.”

“I love you too, mom.” I hang up the phone and let my head fall back on the pillow. I’m suddenly so tired. I think I can just let my eyes rest for a little bit. Yeah, just for a minute.

I’m startled awake when I gentle hand touches my shoulder. I look up and I rub my eyes. I blink a few times trying to get out of my sleep haze. “Mom?”

“Hey, honey. It’s me and dad. The nurse said we could come in for a minute. She said the doctor is about to come see you. How are you feeling?”

I clear my throat and say, “I’m alright. Actually, I’m starting to hurt again. Can you ask the nurse to come in please?”

“Of course.” Mom leans down and kisses my head and she walks out to get the nurse for me. I look up and I see dad standing by the window looking out. I feel a pang of guilt wash over me knowing he’s still disappointed in me. I hate knowing that I made him and mom feel that way about me.

“Dad?”

He turns and walks over to me. He sits down in the chair that Viktor was in, and he takes my hand. For a second I wonder where Viktor went, and wonder if he’s coming back, but then I push it away. It’s weird I want him here. I have no idea who he is. But why am I nervous he won’t come back?

“How’s my baby girl doing?”

“I’m okay, dad. How are you?”

“Oh, I’m alright. You gave your mother and me quite a scare.”

“I know, dad, and I’m sorry. I never meant for any of this to happen …” My voice cracks and tears make my vision blurry. I hate feeling this way. I hate feeling as if this past year has been nothing but a mistake.

Dad squeezes my hand as he says, “You have nothing to be sorry about. All I care about is you being safe and healthy. You and my grandbaby. I know you think you have disappointed me and your mother, but you haven’t. I’m so proud of you. You finished high school, when others would’ve quit. You held your head high when people looked down at you or said nasty things about you. And most of all, you’ve decided to become a mother. I know you’ll do a great job at raising this little girl. Don’t for one second think that I am not proud of you. Ava, you are the strongest girl I know. You understand me?”

“Yes, daddy. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything.” I can’t hold back the tears anymore. I let them fall as he pulls me to him and holds me while I cry. He holds me and rubs my back and tells me over and over I have nothing to be sorry for. I know what he’s saying is partly true. I never asked to get pregnant. I never asked for any of this. It’s not fair that I’ve had to go through all this, and Malcolm gets to leave as if nothing ever happened. I’ll never forgive him for this. I don’t care if he ever comes back or not. As I cry on dad’s shoulder, I promise myself that I will never let anything like this happen to me again. The pain I feel from freaking labor mixed with the emotional pain, is making it almost unbearable. I try to put on a brave face, not wanting dad to see how much I’m starting to hurt again.

I pull away and I wipe my face off with the tissues dad gives me. I look at dad and he smiles at me and I can’t help but smile back. I can see he meant every word he said before and I can tell how much he loves me. “Thanks, dad. I think I just needed to cry.”

“That’s alright, baby. I’ll always be here when you need a shoulder to cry on. Don’t you ever forget that.”

I nod and I hear mom walk back in with the nurse.
She stays silent as she leans over and gives me a kiss on my forehead and tells dad they have to go to the waiting room. Once they’re out of the room, my nurse tells me she has to check me again. I lay back, trying not to feel embarrassed that she’s getting an eye full of nothing but bush. I can feel my face heat up and I already know I’m blushing again. I also wonder yet again, where Viktor is and I can’t help but wish he was here to talk to me again.

“Miss Walker, I’m sorry to tell you this, but I don’t think we’re going to have enough time for your epidural.”

I sit up straight in my bed. “What do you mean? We have time. The baby isn’t coming yet.”

“Miss Walker, you’re at nine and a half centimeters now. There isn’t time. I’m sorry sweetie, but we are going to have to do this the all-natural way.”

“No, no, no, no.” I shake my head at her. “I … I can’t do that! Please! Tell the drug doctor I’ll make her wait! I can’t do this!” I start to panic. There’s no way I can handle this pain without help. It’s too much. I’m too young to feel this much pain.

“Miss Walker, I’m going to need you to calm down. Everything will be alright. Just take a few deep breathes for me. I need you to breathe through the pain.”

How can she be so calm? How I am supposed to be calm? The machines I’m hooked up to start to go off. I hear the nurse tell me over and over that I need to calm down, but I can’t. All I can think of is the pain. I can’t do this. I start to cry again and I tell the nurse over and over to get me the drugs. I don’t think she gets that I’m not ready for this. I’m not prepared to go through labor and pushing out my baby without drugs. I can’t. There’s no way!

“What’s going on?” I hear his voice and I instantly look for his face. I watch him walk over to me and he sits on the side of the bed. He pulls me close and I cry on his chest. I grip his shirt tightly, grateful he came back. He’s being so kind to me, even if he doesn’t know me. The feeling is overwhelming.

“Shh …
eto budet khorosho moy dragotsennyy
.” Viktor says to me. I still have no idea what he’s saying, but it does start to calm me. He says this over and over until I stop crying. The machines that were going crazy, stop going off. The nurse is still in the room and I can feel her watching us.

“Miss Walker? Are you alright now?”

I pull away from Viktor and I nod. I don’t even turn to look at my nurse. Viktor holds my gaze. He’s the one keeping me grounded and from not freaking the fuck out again. He smiles at me and wipes my tears away. I feel embarrassed again, knowing this man has seen me at my lowest. Who is he? Why’s he still here with me? I don’t understand it. I don’t want to understand it right now. All I do know is, there’s something about him, something that makes me want to pull him closer and push him away at the same time. My brain is telling me to be careful, and I will listen. The last time I ignored my brain, I got pregnant.

I hold tight to Viktor’s arms when I feel the pain again. I try not to cry out, but hell, it’s impossible. I hear the nurse say something and she leaves. I try to get control of the pain, trying not to let it take over me, but I don’t know how. All I know is, I feel lots of pressure. I feel the need to push.

“Viktor?”

“I’m right here with you. You’re going to be fine. The nurse went to go get the doctor. I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere.”

I hold onto the steel bed rail while my other hand curls around Viktor’s hand. I let out a loud scream and I feel the urge to push more and more. Finally, some of the pressure lets up and I hear the nurse and my doctor come in.

“How we doing in here?” Dr. Brightstone asks.

“Please, tell the nurse there’s time for the drugs. I can’t do this.”

“Ava, we talked about this. I told you this was a possibility. You’re a very strong young woman, and we’re all here to help you. Just try and stay calm and relax as much as possible. I’m going to check you to see how far you are.”

Once Dr. B is finished, it seems everything starts to happen way too fast for me. Dr. B starts telling the nurse to get everyone ready, and to call the nursery. Another lady walks in with a table with a blue sheet draped over the top. She pulls the table right behind the other nurse that’s taking my bed apart. I watch as two more nurses roll in the weight machine for the baby, and they start to turn on other machines for the baby. I can’t do anything but stare when the doctor helps the nurse put the stirrups on the bed and I start to panic. This can only mean the baby is coming. She’s coming and I have to do this.

“Ava, look at me.” I look at Viktor and he smiles at me. It’s strange to me how he sensed I was about to go into panic mode again.