Test Drive (Crossroads Book 3) (26 page)

“You sure this is yours? It comes with a lot of responsibility. You see, I fell in love with the man who wears this hat. If it fits, that means you’re stuck with me. It means you’re mine.”

Jesus, it felt good to see the man. He was here. He’d come back. He’d… “Fuck you for stealing my damn thunder. I was on my way to you. And are you sure you want to play this game? I won’t let you go this time. In the beginning, you said I sounded like I was looking for my happy ending. I wasn’t but the damn thing seemed to find me anyway.”

Justin took a step closer, stepped into the house. He took the baseball cap off his head, and put it backward on Drew’s. “This is home…you’re home. I kept saying I needed to go home and it took going back there to realize home isn’t a place. It’s you.”

They were being ridiculous again. Ridiculous and sappy and cheesy and Drew fucking loved it. He reached out, cupped Justin’s face in his hands. “I can’t believe you’re here.”

“I have nowhere to stay. I don’t have a job. I have a fucking house payment in North Carolina until I can sell the damn thing. Remember all this excitement when you realize how much baggage I’ve come with.”

He didn’t give a shit about that. They’d figure it out later. He stepped closer, went to kiss Justin and then…
bark, bark!

What the—?

“Oh, and I have a dog, too. Drew meet Ireland, Ireland this is Drew.”

The dog ran right past him into the house and jumped on the couch. “I’ve always wanted a dog.” Drew smiled.

“You have one now. And can you hurry up and kiss me? I drove nonstop to get here. I want a kiss, then a wall-fuck. That would be fantastic. Then we should get into the hot tub before we fuck again in your bed. I really missed your bed.”

Jesus, he loved this man. “Shut up,” Drew told him, and then he kissed him. Wanted to devour him. Never wanted to take his mouth off of him.

Justin moaned and leaned into their kiss. Drew swallowed it, kissed deeper. Wanted more. When their mouths parted, they didn’t pull away. Their foreheads touched and Drew closed his eyes.

“I love you. My head was a mess when I left, but there’s never been a doubt in my mind that I love you.”

“I love you too.”

That was life wasn’t it? People didn’t always do the right thing. Sometimes they made mistakes or had to take a different route to get to the same place than someone else did. They detoured, or test drove a hundred different cars before finding the one they fell in love with.

People got hurt, people hurt others, people died, but the living part? Living and laughing and loving? That made everything else worth it. He couldn’t wait to start doing that part with Justin.

“Nick. I’m going to gnaw my fucking arm off. When is the food going to be done?” Bryce whined, making Justin chuckle.

“Would you relax? You’re so damn impatient. If you don’t relax, I’m letting everyone eat except for you!” Nick replied as he stood at the stove mixing the sauce in the large pot. “If I take it off too soon, the sausage won’t be right. There’s a science to cooking that you don’t understand.”

“Oh, I don’t need sausage,” Rod cut in. “Landon gave me his before we left home. I don’t have to wait for his. I just have to touch it and it’s ready.”

The whole room erupted in loud laughter.

“Holy shit, that was good. I wish I would’ve thought of that. You have one on me,” Bryce told Rod. It seemed they were always trying to one-up each other. It was fun to watch.

“Your partner is crazy,” Justin teased his brother.

“I know he is. I can’t keep up with him half the time, but that’s exactly why I love him so damn much.”

Justin nodded before looking across the room at Drew, who played with the dick cards with his brother, Jacob.

As though he felt Justin’s eyes on him, Drew looked up and winked. Jesus, he was happy. Happier than he’d ever been because of the man looking at him with dick cards in his hand and because of the people around him.

It had been a few months since their father had passed away. Justin was settled into Drew’s home, enrolled in school to start next term, and he’d found a job remodeling houses, which was more the kind of work he was used to than working at the restaurant with Nick.

This was one of the many get-togethers the group had had since Justin moved here. He’d gotten to know his siblings well, felt comfortable around them. They were his family…as was Joy. He smiled thinking of his dad. He would love to see them all now.

“You know I knew something was going on with you and Drew the whole time, don’t you?” Landon asked.

Justin rolled his yes. “No you didn’t. We were good at the incognito thing.”

“Yeah, Mister
I think I jerked off with that guy, oh nevermind. It’s not him!
”

Justin laughed at that. Okay, so maybe that had been a little obvious. “It wasn’t supposed to be anything important.”

“Neither was Rod,” Landon replied.

“Or Nick,” Bryce added stepping up to them. Justin hadn’t realized he’d been close enough to hear.

“But now they’re everything,” Justin said, knowing the three men were on the same page as he was.

“Yeah,” Landon replied.

“Yeah, they are,” Bryce added. “Did I tell you guys Nick’s sister is letting us spend time with the kids? Both of us.”

Nick had told Justin that his sister’s husband hadn’t accepted his relationship with Bryce, and she was keeping her kids away from their uncle. There’d been one time when she’d gone against her husband’s wishes, but then she’d pulled back. It looked like things were changing.

“No shit? That’s great,” Landon told Bryce.

“How did that happen?” Justin asked.

“She just woke up, I guess. A lot of things have changed for her. She’s not living under her husband’s thumb any longer. I wanted it so fucking badly for Nick. I’m glad it’s happening.” Bryce’s eyes found Nick and as soon as they did, Nick turned back and looked at him. It was the same thing Drew had done to Justin minutes before. The same thing Landon and Rod did to one another as well.

He remembered when he first met Nick and Bryce at Shanen’s for his dad’s party, how they looked at each other, the love there. It was the same love Rod and Landon had. The same love he and Drew had.

“When do you guys leave for your trip?” Landon asked, pulling Justin from his thoughts.

“Not for about six weeks.” He was ready now. They were going to Scotland and Ireland. They planned to do everything Drew had told him about.

“Dinner’s done!” Nick called from the kitchen.

“Finally!” Bryce replied. Everyone made their way toward the kitchen, letting Shanen go first. Justin waited where he was in the living room, and Drew found his way to him.

“Mm…let’s skip dinner. I’d rather have my mouth on you instead.” Drew wrapped his arms around Justin and buried his face in his neck.

“I like that idea, though I have to admit, I’m a little hungry too.” And there was the fact that the sauce smelled incredible. Nick was a great chef.

“Me too. I just always want my mouth on you.”

“We can hide out in the—”

“Don’t even think about it!” Rod told them. “We’re hanging out. No disappearing for sex during family time.”

It was important to Rod—spending time together. It was important to all of them, but Rod didn’t have family other than the people in this room. Justin was glad to be a part of it.

“I swear, the things I hear. I wish your friend Christi could have come, Bryce. It’s hard being the only woman,” Shanen teased, earning a round of chuckles from everyone.

They all sat at the table together, and ate. There was laughter and jokes. Conversation and stories and more laughter. Things had changed for all of them. That’s what losing someone did to you sometimes, it changed you, made you realize what you had, and made you hold on tight to that. Drew and Jacob were getting along better than ever, and Justin couldn’t be happier for his guy.

“I love you,” Drew told him as though he could read Justin’s thoughts.

“I love you too,” Justin replied. He wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of his life with this man, and he knew without a doubt that would happen.

They were cleaning up the dinner mess, when Landon’s phone rang. His brother frowned at his cell before picking it up. “Hey, buddy. How’s it going?” Landon said.

There was a silence and then, “Yeah, of course. Is everything okay?”

Another pause. “Okay, no problem. Sounds good.” He hung up and Rod frowned at him.

“Who was that? Is something wrong?” he asked.

“Yes. No. Actually, I’m not sure. I think it’s okay. That was Beckett. He asked if he could come and see me. Said he needs to get away.”

“Who’s Beckett?” Drew asked, right before Bryce said, “Beckett fucking Monroe?” Well, obviously Bryce knew who he was. “Last year’s Supercross champion, Beckett Monroe?”

“I think Bryce just came,” Rod said and Justin let out a laugh.

It looked like they had a Supercross rider coming to town.

THE END

JUMP START
a Crossroads novella coming Fall 2016.

TOUCH THE SKY
—Riley Hart writing as Nyrae Dawn with Christina Lee

Chapter One

Gabriel

Five years earlier…

Lucas,

Dude, are we really doing this? I can’t believe we’re going to come out to our families. I mean, I’m glad. I really am. No matter what. No matter how my dad responds—and he will respond—hopefully not with his fist. But fuck, I can take it because it’s eating me alive, being locked inside myself like this. I’ve been going stir crazy, man.

I wish we lived closer and we could meet up someplace afterward, especially if it doesn’t go so well. You know my dad; he can be a bastard. But from what you’ve told me about your mom… I think she’ll be great. And my mom, she might just do what she normally does, which is ignore me. But at least it’ll be out there and they’ll know.

Because shit, it’s so lonely… I sound like such a wuss when I say things like that. I’m alone, because no one knows me. Not like you do. I don’t feel as empty inside when I message you. It’s like you get me. I know you do. But this time next week our families will know who we are too.

And maybe… I don’t know, I’ve got to have hope. I’ve got to believe it’ll be okay. If not, it’s not too much longer until we’re eighteen. We’ll go to West Hollywood and really live. I can’t wait to do everything we talked about! I can’t wait to meet you in person one day. I’m so damn glad we found each other on that message board.

We got this,

Gabriel 

I stare at the five-year-old email with a lump in my throat. I saved them all, even the photos he sent me of himself with that wavy black hair, green eyes, and lips that I pictured kissing on more than one occasion. Mostly, I imagined having a friend. Somebody I could trust through the emotional wreckage that had been consuming my life.

But that message was the final one I’d written to him. The last time I remember being so fucking scared of what would happen. If you didn’t count when the steel door locked behind me with my parents on the other side. That was the night some stranger saw me teetering on the ledge of a bridge. I wasn’t going to jump, for fuck’s sake—I was only chasing a high. Trying to quiet the buzzing noise inside my brain. It was better than feeling numb. Way the hell better.

Moving here wasn’t nearly as frightening as all of that. It was a relief to leave San Diego and come to West Hollywood. To drop my general courses at SDU and figure out my own path. This is the city I thought I’d be meeting Lucas in someday, and somehow being here, even though I haven’t spoken to him in years, makes me feel like I’m working toward some goal. The same goal I had confided to him so long ago.

I also came because I was itching to get the hell away, to finally be on my own. I was too much of a chickenshit the year after my hospitalization to message Lucas and admit that they’d slapped a bipolar label on me. That I’d been given powerful meds because apparently you can also become delusional or some shit while manic.

My dad’s face, though, that was the worst. And when I came out to him in that inpatient therapy session—fuck. Worse than his fist against my stomach. But we never talked about his threatening words, his punishing glares. My mom catering to him and never to me. I was the dirty secret, me and my messed-up head, not him.

My back slides against the wall until I’m sitting on the floor in my room with my laptop on my knees. The cold plaster feels good against my skin. I should delete that email. But I don’t. I can’t. I think of Lucas often, wonder what he’s up to. If he found somebody else who got him. A good guy, a beautiful guy.
Love.
My chest seizes up.

I want that for him, wonder if we could have had it together. Or maybe he would’ve continued to just be my friend. Hell, I’m not sure I’ll be able to have that with anybody. Not with the way the wires are crossed in my brain.

My foot connects with my forgotten glass of soda, spilling it in a small river over the hardwood floor. “Damn it!” My thoughts are all over the place lately, thinking about those old emails, and starting to feel like shit for no reason that makes any type of sense.

I toss aside my computer on the bed and grab for the tissue box to clean up the mess.

“Everything cool in there?” My roommate calls to me through the locked door.

“Fine,” I grumble. Gotta keep this place clean or Ezra might find a good excuse to kick me out. Dude smokes his share of weed but he knows when even one thing is out of place in this apartment.

“You call off sick today?” he asks in a muffled voice. The problem with renting a room on the outskirts of West Hollywood from a dude who paints in his home studio is that he knows my schedule too well, including how early or late I get home. But years ago, Lucas and I didn’t bank on how pricey the area would be, only that it was liberal and thriving enough for two kids who had wanderlust.