A Woman's Wisdom: How the Book of Proverbs Speaks to Everything (5 page)

our wisdom

All of this leaves us with a problem: we can’t do it! Who among us could ever hope to achieve wisdom such as we see in Proverbs? Wisdom is indeed impossible for us, even though, after glimpsing the benefits of it, we want to become wise women. What are we to do? The realization of our impossible dilemma brings Paul’s words to life: “God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are, so that no human being might boast in the presence of God. And because of him you are in Christ Jesus, who became to us wisdom from God” (1 Cor. 1:28–30). Christ is our wisdom, in both its characteristics and benefits. We have no wisdom of our own, but if we are in him, we have his wisdom, which means we can grow it to fullness. In Christ “are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge” (Col. 2:3). If we are in Christ, those treasures are
ours too.

A young couple walks hand in hand into the jewelry store. The girl’s face is aglow with happiness. The young man looks happy too, but he also gives off a bit of nervous anxiety. His girl has just said yes to his marriage proposal, and they have come in to buy an engagement ring. The jeweler, who has seen dozens of couples walk through his doors, knows from first glance why they have come. As he greets the couple, he unlocks the glass case inside of which are nestled rows of diamond rings—oval, emerald, marquis, and princess—and whisks onto the counter a black velvet display square. He knows that the sparkle of the rings shows most brightly against the contrasting dark background of the velvet.

The book of Proverbs does something similar. Its authors knew that wisdom is seen in the light of full splendor when displayed against the darkness of folly. A foolish woman is the opposite of a wise woman. A foolish woman is not necessarily one lacking intellectual capabilities; in fact, from an intellectual standpoint, she might be one of the brightest women around. So what makes her foolish?

Unlike a wise woman, a foolish one does not fear the Lord. She doesn’t submit to God but seeks to live unencumbered by any rule or authority that thwarts her desires. She feeds on arrogance rather than on humility, as we will see here in this quick overview, and later through out
the book.

traits of a foolish woman

The dark threads of folly are woven throughout the thirty-one chapters of Proverbs, and, as we will note, these dark threads can entangle us spiritually, emotionally, physically, and materially.

She Is Easily Enticed by the World

Proverbs shows us that a foolish woman is one easily enticed by the world. We see her in the woman who buys into the lie that looking young and beautiful is the path to fulfillment. Anyone who believes that has been ensnared by folly. Such a woman devotes the best of her resources—time and money—to her appearance. Her belief in the sparkling but false promises of physical beauty will prevent her from enjoying the freedom of aging gracefully.

A woman easily enticed by the world is also materialistic and ambitious for worldly success. She is intrigued by worldly philosophies and allows them to shape her understanding about everything. For such a woman, self-esteem and self-worth can seem to her more valuable than following Christ in a lifestyle of self-denial.

She Trusts in Riches

A foolish woman believes the lie that material blessings can be gained apart
from God.

Such a woman disregards the warning of
Proverbs 1:

Temptation to acquire more and more rarely comes at us in such an obvious way. More often, it lurks in the shadows and twists last night’s dinner with a friend into a legitimate business expense or convinces us that it’s not wrong to rack up credit card debt for a
new sofa.

She Is Proud and Hates Knowledge

A foolish woman hates knowledge. She is one who shuns, ignores, disdains, scorns, or rationalizes away biblical wisdom and counsel. She lives by the dictates of her emotions, and she insists on fulfilling her personal desires and believes that her way of thinking is always the right way. To such a woman
Proverbs asks:

The foolish woman is proud, and she is a scoffer. Proverbs indicates that
scoffing
is a refusal to embrace God’s ways—hanging onto that one secret sin, that one relationship, that one bad habit, that one questionable indulgence.

Despite the warnings God sends through his Word and his people, scoffers never really get what they seek, and wisdom will laugh in
their face:

Put more simply, a scoffer, someone characterized and dominated by pride, will inevitably taste great regret. We may not be full-blown scoffers, but we all, without exception, are tainted by the folly of pride. Whenever we blame God for something, we can be sure we are proud. Whenever we think we don’t have a problem with pride, we have a problem with pride. Any time the knowledge of God and his ways is scorned, pride lies at the root
of it.

She Is Complacent

A foolish woman is complacent, which, in this context, means she is contented with a mediocre Christian life. She fails to grasp the truth that there is no middle road, no fence-sitting, when it comes to discipleship; we are at all times either going forward or going backward. That’s why living in limbo is really only an illusion.

Certainly there are times, such as when we are faced with a difficult decision or a perplexing problem, when sitting still for a season is more constructive than throwing all our energies at a quick solution. That sort of limbo is wise because it gives us time to seek God’s leading from Scripture and to get advice from others. The limbo of complacency, on the other hand, isn’t characterized by seeking. Instead, it is characterized by a desire to do nothing more than escape an uncomfortable situation or avoid making a decision. The limbo of complacency is comfortable at first, and often it feels like the safest place to be. There seem to be no risks, whereas to enter wholeheartedly into one particular course or another just feels too scary; after all, we have no guarantee of how things will turn out. But avoidance is actually unsafe. Proverbs is very clear on the danger of complacency:

She Is Lazy

A foolish woman is also lazy. Proverbs advises us to think about how
ants live:

As we look at these ants, we recognize the wisdom of working hard at our particular callings, whether that be homemaking, full-time ministry, or a career. But the principle of industriousness applies equally to spiritual matters and to every other area of our lives. Proverbs sounds a cry to exercise ourselves toward wisdom and good judgment in all our ways and relationships. A lazy woman has no zeal, and her folly is revealed in her refusal to fight against indwelling sin and to live for the glory of God. Underlying much of her struggle with laziness is often a refusal to give up personal comforts.

She Is Sinfully Independent

A foolish woman is sinfully independent. In other words, she seeks autonomy from God and others. To her
Proverbs says:

Foolish independence disregards advice. When we dig in our heels against biblically sound advice, it is typically because we are concerned only with what we want and with our own perceptions. I have witnessed this very scenario with Abby. For months Abby’s friends have expressed concern about her romance with Pete. Over time, the relationship has pulled Abby away from her pursuit of spiritual things, and the light has gone out of her eyes. Pete doesn’t treat her with gentle care or respect. Abby’s friends have seen all this and have voiced their concerns to Abby, but in response she either changes the subject or tells them everything is fine. Deep down she knows they are right, but Abby has been ensnared by folly. If she persists, her heart will grow hard, and she is likely to waste weeks, months, or years in a destructive romantic relationship simply because the immediate, usually short-lived, pain of a breakup is too difficult to contemplate.

how to recognize a fool

As we consider how Proverbs defines foolish character, we might already have in mind a friend who could well benefit from some serious time in this portion of Scripture. Very likely, there are several friends or acquaintances we have mentally pegged. If we want to be wise, however, we won’t devote ourselves to pegging others as fools. We will look instead at ourselves. We cannot know the hearts of others, and we are utterly dependent on God to discern correctly anything about ourselves. Jesus’s conversation with the disciples at the Last Supper makes that clear. Jesus said, “‘Truly, I say to you, one of you will betray me, one who is eating with me.’ They began to be sorrowful and to say to him one after another, ‘Is it I?’” (Mark 14:18–19). It’s interesting that not one of them asked, “Is it Judas?”
¹

Nevertheless, in dependence on the Holy Spirit and God’s Word, moving away from folly and toward wisdom begins with self-examination. Are we foolish women or wise? Let’s examine ourselves in light of this list in Proverbs of things God hates:

We may think we aren’t fools until we realize that haughty eyes are walking into someone’s home and taking pleasure because we have better taste in décor or because our outfit is more appropriate for the occasion. We may think we don’t shed innocent blood until we remember Jesus’s words that anger is murder. We may think we don’t stir up trouble unless we realize that we do so by participating in gossip. Each one of us is, in some way, a foolish woman.

Proverbs doesn’t sugarcoat the outcome of folly. The end of a fool is terrible indeed, and recognizing that we are numbered among fools can be quite discouraging. As we noted earlier, foolish women will hear wisdom laughing (Prov. 1:26). Perhaps you have heard that laugh. It is echoed in the why-oh-whys and the if-onlys:

Fools, according to Proverbs,

Christ our wisdom

So where does that leave us? Wisdom cries aloud for our attention, but so does folly, and because we are inherently sinful, folly doesn’t have to shout as loudly. What are we to do? Again, the remedy is found not so much in exercising ourselves in wise principles but primarily in resting in the source of wisdom: “Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God” (1 Cor. 1:24). Christ is the foolish woman’s remedy. That is how we are meant to apply this proverb:

It bears repeating that overcoming folly and growing in wisdom simply aren’t about culling advice from the book of Proverbs, as if it were the biblical version of
How to Win Friends and Influence People
. Apart from Christ, the earthly blessings that flow from right living are merely a shadow of the real thing. From the Bible’s viewpoint, wise living and its fruit are impossible apart from Christ because the fear of the Lord—Proverbs’ definition of wisdom—is known only to those who are in Christ. If we eat of this bread and drink of the living water he offers, we will know increasingly the wisdom that banishes the folly that clings to us today.