Begin Again (7 page)

Maisie smiled as she continued to care for the rabbit. “Is that all?”

Ryan returned her smile. “It will be a while before I can offer a free day again. But I'm glad we were able to help out so many people and their pets in need of assistance.”

She stroked the rabbit's fur with her finger. “Me, too. And Ryan, what you do for animals … it's amazing.”

Ryan watched her in awe.
She gets me.
“For all your help, can I treat you and Lola to lunch?”

Maisie lifted her head and smirked. “In Illinois?”

Ryan tilted his head back to laugh. “Not today. How about the little Mexican restaurant down the street?”

“Sounds great.” Maisie looked down at the little animal. “What will happen to this little guy?”

“I can try to find him a good home.” He looked at her and paused. “Unless I already have?”

The tiny pink nose nudged her hand. “I think you have.”

Ryan nodded and grinned, “I have some supplies at home I can give you. Later tonight I can bring over your new pet and a cage.”

Maisie took a deep breath. “Okay.”

Before leaving the room, Ryan saw Maisie put the animal back inside the cage with a warm towel and heard her whisper. “I'll think of a name for you later. I hope you like hamsters.”

• • •

Maisie couldn't believe she had agreed to keep the bunny. But when she had seen the helpless baby, her unused maternal instincts had kicked in. Ryan sat across from her at the restaurant. She took a warm, salty tortilla chip out of the basket and dipped it into the spicy salsa.

“Too bad Lola already had lunch plans,” Ryan said before taking a bite of his chimichanga.

Lola had whispered to her that she didn't want to be a third wheel. Plus she was sure the eighteen-year-old had better things to do than to hang out with
old
people. Maisie took another chip. “She doesn't know what she's missing.”

Ryan broke a large chip in half. “We were swamped today, huh?”

“I'll say. I'm exhausted. I think your job is even harder than working at the diner.”

Ryan lifted his glass of soda. “Let's call it a tie.”

Most men who had a college-degree career would look down on a woman who waited tables, but not Ryan. Could he be too good to be real? Was their time together a figment of her imagination?

“So have you thought about a name for your new pet?”

Ryan's question snapped her out of her thoughts. She set down her cola. “Mmm, no. Any ideas?”

He thought for a moment. “How about Lucky?”

Maisie shook her head. “He was abandoned and almost dead when that lady brought him in. Lucky may not be a good name.”

He smiled. “Ah, but I was referring to having you to take care of him.”

Maisie blushed almost as deep as the color of her hair. “I'm sure I'll come up with something.”

• • •

Just as Ryan was about to put the key in the ignition, his phone rang. Caller ID told him it was his friend calling from Illinois.

He put him on speaker. “Hey, Jacob.”

“Hey, man. How's it going?”

“Really good.” Ryan glanced over at the freshly cleaned rabbit. Maisie wouldn't even recognize him from this morning. “I had a free clinic today and had an amazing turnout.”

“That's good. I was thinking about coming to see your new place tomorrow if you're not going to be busy.”

Ryan had hoped to see Maisie tomorrow, but he hadn't spent time with his friend since he moved. Recently divorced, Jacob needed him. “That sounds great.”

“Okay, I'll drive out tomorrow then. Maybe we can get lunch when I get there.”

“See you then.” Ryan disconnected and started his SUV. He looked over at the rabbit, which was twitching his pink nose. “Ready to go home?”

• • •

Cady laughed and shook her head, “A few weeks ago, you didn't even want a hamster, and now you've adopted a bunny, too?”

Maisie shrugged. “I know. Improvement, right?”

Cady hugged her sister. “Yes, I'm glad you're forming connections again.”

“Look, I need to tell you something.” Cady let go of Maisie and sat down on the sofa in Maisie's basement apartment. “Ryan stopped by here the other day while you were at work.”

Maisie's stomach turned the way it had when her mom had told her the truth about Santa when she was ten. “You talked to him?”

“He was worried. He cares a lot about you, Mais.”

“But not enough to respect my privacy,” she said in almost a whisper. She fought the tears burning behind her eyes. “Did you tell him?”

“I didn't go into any details. I just told him about your loss.”

Maisie nodded with her mouth open. “How could you? I wasn't ready to talk to him about that. Now when he looks at me, I won't know if it's only pity I see in his eyes.”

Her sister shook her head. “Oh Mais, he doesn't pity you! He likes you. A lot! I can tell.”

Maisie stood up and walked over to the tiny window. Who was she fooling? Ryan would only feel sympathy for her, not love. She pressed her hand to her stomach and closed her eyes. Now she'd never know how he truly felt. She didn't want Ryan to see her hideous scars, ever.

“I need to be alone,” she said in a harsh whisper.

“Okay. I'm sorry. I thought … ” her sister's words trailed off as she headed up the stairs.

Maisie sat down on the floor and let the tears fall. It would have been so easy to fall into Ryan's arms and pretend that nothing had ever happened, pretend that she was unscathed and whole. But she couldn't do that to him. He deserved better. She dried her eyes and picked up her phone to call him.

“Hey, I'm almost there. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised when you see Lucky.”

Maisie forced herself to smile so the sadness would leave her voice. “Um, I'm not feeling well. Could you just give him to my sister?”

Silence for a moment. “I guess so. Is everything okay?”

She nodded as if he could see her through the phone. “Yes, I just think I'm getting a cold or something.”

“Okay, well, feel better. If you want, I can just keep him until you feel better.”

Darn. She was really looking forward to holding the baby bunny again. Boots wasn't much of a cuddler. “Well you've already named him anyway,” she said, more coldly than she'd meant to. “I'm sorry. That's nice of you. I'll call you tomorrow.”

Ryan frowned as he hung up the phone. What had happened to Maisie since lunch? Maybe she
was
feeling sick, but he sensed something else was bothering her. He wasn't used to having to work so hard for a woman's attention. He drove the SUV and his disappointment back home. He had been looking forward to seeing her tonight. If she lived alone, he'd at least have the excuse to bring her some soup. But he knew her sister would take care of her if she really was sick. Unsure what to do, Ryan picked up his phone and called his sister.

“Rose, it's me. Got a minute?”

“I always have time for my baby brother. What's up?” It was good to hear her voice.

“I've met someone amazing, but she's different, and I don't know how to let her know how I feel without pushing her away.”

“That's great! I mean that you met someone, not the other thing.”

Ryan laughed.

“How is she different?”

He pulled his SUV into the garage and lifted the cage with Lucky sound asleep inside. “She's been through a terrible tragedy, and she doesn't know that I know about it.”

“Just be your sweet self, and she'll see how you feel.”

“I've tried that.” Ryan sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. “I really like her, sis. A lot.”

“I'd say so since this is the first time you've ever asked me for advice about a woman.”

“She's everything I've been looking for my whole life.” He closed his eyes and pictured Maisie's face the first time he had gotten a smile out of her. “You know I haven't even kissed her yet?”

“Really? I'm proud of you. All your life you've gone for the girls that throw themselves at you. My little brother has finally grown up.”

“Ha ha. Don't get me wrong, Maisie is a knockout. She just doesn't know it. And she has a pure heart.”

“Momma and Daddy told me about your visit. I think they like her as much as you do. Can't wait to meet the woman that finally caught my brother's heart.”

He sighed. “Should I tell her how I'm feeling? She tends to push me away if I get too close.”

“Actions first — the words can come later. Who knows, maybe she feels the same way.”

“Thanks, sis.” Ryan disconnected. He got out the critter food and fed Rex and his temporary visitor. He hoped his sister was right. If Maisie didn't feel the same way about him — well, he couldn't even think about it.

• • •

Ryan opened the door to his longtime friend. Jacob, who stood about six inches taller than him, reached out to shake his hand, and Ryan pulled him in for a manly hug.

“Good to see you, man.”

Ryan nodded. “Glad you made it. Come on in.”

Jacob looked around as he walked inside. “Nice place.”

“Thanks. I'm just renting this place. It was the best I could find on short notice, but I do plan on looking for a home to buy next year.”

Ryan walked his buddy around his place. When they got to the kitchen, Ryan opened the refrigerator. “Soda?”

“Sure,” Jacob said, taking the can from him.

They went back into the living room and sat down.

“So how many more pets are you planning on getting?” Jacob chuckled as he glanced at the rabbit cage.

Ryan smiled. “Rex, the rat, is mine. I'm holding onto Lucky for a friend.”

“Business is good?”

Ryan set his can down on the table. “Great. There is a big need for my services in this town.”

Jacob took a long swig of his drink. “I'm happy for you, man. I do miss watching games with you, though.”

“I know. But, hey, the drive wasn't too bad, right?”

He shook his head. “Not bad at all.”

Ryan knew his friend needed to talk about more than the small stuff or he wouldn't be here in his house. “So what's up? Any dating?”

“Nah.” Jacob crushed the empty can. “I can't really see getting involved with anyone else.”

Something was definitely on his friend's mind. “You're young. You're single.”

“I know. I still can't wrap my head around her cheating on me.” He paused. “She wants me back.”

Ryan's eyes widened. “Wants you back?”

Jacob nodded his head. “She said it was a mistake. That she still loves me.”

Ryan hoped Kate wouldn't suck his friend in again; she was bad news. “What do
you
want?”

Jacob sat back with one leg propped up and tugged on the hem of his jeans. “I don't know. I still love her.”

Ryan rubbed his chin. “Have you thought about counseling?”

“Maybe. What do you think?”

He couldn't ignore the hope in his friend's eyes. “I think you should follow your heart.”

Jacob nodded. “Enough about me. Who has your attention in this town besides all the rats, birds, and lizards?”

Ryan smiled. “Her name is Maisie Scott. She's amazing, and I'm hoping she feels the same way about me.”

He laughed. “Women always feel that way about you.”

“Yeah, but she's different.”

• • •

“What's wrong with you today?” Lola asked, eyeing Maisie from across the diner's counter. “From the way you and Ryan were looking at each other yesterday, I thought you'd be in a great mood today.”

Maisie sighed and filled the coffeemaker. “I don't want to talk about it.” She glanced at the clock. Ten more minutes and Ryan would be walking through those doors for his apple pie.

She popped a bubble. “Well snap out of it, will you?”

Maisie drew her eyebrows together and turned to look at Lola.

Lola shook her head. “I'm sorry. It's just that ever since Ryan started coming in the diner, you've acted alive. I don't want you to regress.”

“You don't understand.” Maisie walked away to fill her last order of the night. As she was carrying the tray of food back to the table, she realized Ryan hadn't come in. If she was avoiding him, why did the thought of not seeing him have her in knots?

• • •

After she cleaned Boots's cage and fed him a peanut, Maisie decided to take a hot shower. Ryan hadn't shown up at the diner. Had she successfully pushed him away? Sadness filled her heart as steam filled up the bathroom. She leaned against the tile wall of the shower with her head hanging down and watched the suds go down the drain.

“Maisie!” her sister called from the other side of the door.

It wasn't like her sister to come down here at night, especially when she was in the shower. She reached down and shut off the water. “Yeah?”

“Ryan's upstairs in my living room.”

Maisie's mouth dropped open. “Uh, I'll be up as soon as I'm dressed.”

“Okay!”

Oh my goodness, he's here!
Probably to give me the bunny. Or to see me!
Maisie dried off as fast as she could and threw on a pair of shorts and T-shirt. She looked in the mirror at her wet hair. No time to dry it. She pulled it into a ponytail and swiped on some lip gloss and eyeliner. In a hurry, she skipped the powder she usually brushed over her freckles to lighten them. After a deep breath, she walked up the stairs to find Ryan sitting on the sofa with her sister and Sam.

“Feeling better?” Ryan asked looking up at her with a sheepish smile.

She had almost forgotten she'd told him she was sick yesterday. “Mmm-hmm.”