Behind Closed Doors (3 page)

“
Very
well,” I scowled playfully. “Thank you for that bit.”

Heading
out to the car, my driver was waiting for me. Alex sat in the front
with him, and I was taken to my meeting. It was the last place I
wanted to be, but at least there was human interaction, something I
sorely lacked at home.

I
pulled my small personal phone out of my purse, not my issued one. I
didn’t need them tracking every damn call I made. I had my
driver stop at a kiosk and grab me a pre-paid phone time to time. I
tossed them randomly and grabbed a new one so I had a little privacy.
It was the only way I knew my calls weren’t tracked. It’s
not like I was calling people I shouldn’t be, but I resented
that every single thing I did was watched.

Dialing
my sister, “Jamie, are you busy for dinner?” I frowned at
her answer, “Right, okay, no problem. I just thought I’d
give you a quick ring.” I listened to her rattle off one of a
thousand excuses and responded. “No, nothing important, I’m
heading to a luncheon. No, no, I understand, have a good day.”

My
sister was heading to pick up her son. My nephew was sweet, but I
barely knew him like I should. My sister lived a more bohemian
lifestyle and we weren’t close. Regardless, I reached out time
to time to check in. I tried my mom, but she was busy at a
conference. My father was my last shot. I didn’t really have
anybody else left to call.

“
Daddy,
how are you? A meeting, right…no, I’ll catch you later.”

There
was nobody else. I sat alone in the back of the car, waiting for my
driver to drop me at my luncheon. I’d paste a smile on my face
and pretend I wasn’t desperately lonely, and make a good
impression. That’s all it was, showing up, being seen, and
acting like I gave a damn. That’s all they wanted anyway, and
maybe some money for their agenda, or a photo op.

As
the car approached the country club where the meeting was being held,
I decided I wasn’t going in. “Reggie, can you turn around
and leave. I don’t think I’m going today. Please take me
home.”

“
Yes,
Ma’am,” he answered back.

I
pulled out my other phone, the business one, and called the head of
the event. Profusely apologizing, I excused myself, begging out with
a terrible migraine. The host feigned sympathy, but all she cared
about was my name and face for her photo opportunity. I hated my
life, I realized in that very moment just how much. Something had to
give, needed to change, or I’d forever be living this lie.

Before
we reached the house, I redirected Reggie. “Will you stop over
at Brielle’s Coffee Café first?”

“
Yes,
Ma’am.” I hated all those Ma’am’s. I
understood why my employees answered that way, but it made me feel
older than I was, and felt so formal. I craved regular interaction,
not the kind where people were detached.

As
the dark town car pulled to the curb, I got out, “Alex, would
you join me? Reggie would you like me to grab you something? You can
park the car; I’ll be a little bit. I’d like to sit for a
while.”

“
No
Ma’am, but thank you.”

Alex
stepped onto the sidewalk, as Reggie opened the door for me. “Will
you sit with me?” I directed the question to my bodyguard.

“
Certainly,”
he said and went with me into the small café.

I
smiled warmly at the woman behind the counter and placed my order.
“Is the small room in the back available?”

“
Yes,
Mrs. Michaels, shall I bring your stuff back there?”

“
That
would be great, I appreciate it.”

We
headed towards the back of the small café, and passed through
a curtain. In the back there were two overstuffed chairs set aside in
a small private area. I’ve been coming here for a quite a bit,
and Brielle the owner shared her private alcove with me. It was for
special clients, and she included me in that list. Most people didn’t
realize there was a sitting area behind the curtain and thought it
was storage.

Two
French country patterned chairs sat caddy corner to one another with
a small table between them. Sitting, I looked at Alex. He looked
stiff and postured as always. He took the chair facing the curtain so
he could keep an eye on things. I was amused, knowing I wouldn’t
be assaulted in the little coffee café, but he took his job
seriously.

“
Alex,
for just a moment can you be my friend and not my employee?”

He
looked at me curiously.

“
I
want to ask you something, but not as your boss. I need some advice,
and I don’t really have anyone to talk to.”

He
looked down, not sure how to answer. This wasn’t in his job
description, but he was human after all.

“
Look,
I just need a friend,” I said quietly.

“
Elle,
I’m not sure what you need, but I’m here.”

“
Thank
you, Alex.” I felt badly watching him shift, knowing he wasn’t
sure how to respond. He was so straight forward, and focused on his
job, and here I was asking him to just be a person, my friend for a
moment.

He
nodded.

“
Alex,
are you married or in a relationship? I’m not coming onto you,”
I corrected quickly, I just wanted to bounce a thought off him.
Knowing if he was committed he’d look at the question I was
going to ask in a different way than if he was single.

“
Not
currently,” he answered. “I almost married, but it didn’t
work out.”

“
I’m
sorry,” I said, almost a knee jerk response.

“
Thank
you, but it’s for the best. We wouldn’t have been happy.
She didn’t understand the term monogamy.”

“
I’m
sorry,” I said again, knowing full well how that felt.

He
nodded.

“
Alex,
do you think I’m a fool to stay? Knowing that Harry openly
cheats on me,” I trailed off.

“
Only
you can truly know what you want out of your relationship,” he
answered, as if to say it was okay if I was getting something out of
the marriage.

“
I’ve
thought of leaving him, but I feel trapped. He’s in a bid for a
possible Vice Presidency run, and if I leave I’ll hurt his
chances of getting it.”

“
That’s
a lot of pressure to place on your shoulders,” he commented.

“
I’m
torn,” I sighed. “I’m tired of hurting and living a
lie, and yet I don’t want to ruin his career either.”

“
We
can only be responsible for our own actions, Elle. He’s
responsible for his own choices,” he finished. After a moment’s
pause, “You deserve better.”

I
looked at my bodyguard and smiled softly, “Thank you. Some days
I feel like a fool for staying, and yet I don’t know if I have
it in me to leave.”

Sitting
and drinking my tea, Alex sipped his coffee. I asked him about his
childhood, and with a little prodding he shared a few shredded
details. It was like pulling teeth, but it was nice to have a regular
conversation.

Standing,
I smoothed my skirt, “You can go back to work now,” I
smiled at him.

“
Thank
you, Elle.” He said finding his comfort level again.

“
I
appreciate you talking to me for a while,” I said. “I
don’t have many friends these days, and the people that hang
around all want something from me.”

“
That
must be difficult,” he answered.

“
I
don’t know who to trust, who to talk to, and I hate being
lonely,” I finished. Walking out to the car, I got in and
handed a small bag to Reggie. “I got you some cookies,” I
smiled.

“
Thank
you, Ma’am.”

When
Harry walked into the sitting room, I got up and left. I didn’t
want to be around him right now. He usually avoided me anyway, but he
had something to say. “Elle, I need to speak with you,”
he started.

I
rolled my eyes and turned around before I was able to exit the room.
Sitting back down, I looked at my husband. I realized in that moment
I felt nothing for him anymore. I wished it had been different, but
it was too late. I was tired of my husband fucking around on me,
treating me like an accessory, and taking me for granted.

“
There’s
been discussion, and it would appear I’ve moved to the short
list of choices for the VP position. We’re going to have to be
a united front and make a few appearances,” he started.

“
What’s
the matter; your mistress is busy and can’t make it?”

He
pretended like I didn’t say anything. “Do you really need
to do that now? A matching suit would be nice, dark colors,
conservative hair and shoes would be appreciated. It’s
important that we present ourselves in our best light.”

“
Harry,
I can’t do this,” I started. I sighed, I hadn’t
planned to go there, but I couldn’t stop the train from
derailing.

“
What
do you mean you can’t do this?” He looked at me like I
had two heads. “You need to be there for these appearances.
These are big photo ops, and there will be a lot of them over the
next few weeks, maybe even months.”

I
sighed, “Harry, the game is over. I can’t do it anymore.
I can’t be your pawn. Our marriage is nothing but a front.”
I stood up and felt amazingly strong as the words slipped out.

“
What?”
He called out as I started to walk away. “Get back here, Elle.
You can’t drop a bombshell like that and not discuss it.”

I
turned around, feeling next to nothing but relieved. “What’s
to discuss? You’ve been fucking around with other women, you
treat me like dirt, and I don’t love you. My lawyer will be in
touch,” I said and then left.

Harry
chased after me, “Elle, get back here. We aren’t finished
yet.”

“
That’s
where you’re wrong, Harry. I am finished.”

As
Harry grabbed my wrist, I spun around, “Don’t you dare.”

Hunter
stepped out from the wall, I barely saw him there. “Remove your
hand from Mrs. Michaels,” he said firmly.

Harry
turned and looked at the man talking, “Watch your tone, I’ll
have your ass fired,” he said.

“
Again,
remove your hand from Mrs. Michaels. This is your last warning.”

Harry
dropped my wrist, spinning his attention to my bodyguard. “What’s
your problem? Elle is my wife. You’re out of a job, son. You
don’t speak to the Governor like that,” he said in a
power play.

“
I
don’t work for you,” he said with a cool tone. “I
work for your wife.” Standing his ground, he stepped up to
Harry’s face. “I suggest you keep your hands to yourself
if you can’t be a gentleman,” he wasn’t fooling
around.

I
felt goose bumps watching the scenario take place. You’d think
my husband would be the one watching out for me, protecting me, but
when it came down to it, it was Alex who had my back.

Harry
turned around annoyed, “You’ll be out of here so fast
your head will spin,” he called behind him. Pulling out his
phone he called his assistant. “Contact the agency and have my
wife’s bodyguard fired immediately.”

Hanging
up, he stomped down the hallway.

“
Alex,
I’m sorry,” I started.

“
Elle,
it’s my job, don’t apologize.”

“
Don’t
worry, I’ll smooth it over. You’re not going anywhere,”
I said. “I want you here with me.”

“
It’s
not necessary,” he said, “I’ll be leaving in the
morning.”

“
Alex?”
I was confused.

“
I
can’t do this job with a clear head, I’ve got growing
feelings.”

Hearing
the words took her off guard, “What?”

“
It’s
hard to stay unbiased when I’m getting too attached.”

I
stood looking at the man before me. “I don’t know what to
say.”

“
There’s
nothing to say,” he started, “you’re a married
woman.”

“
Not
for much longer,” I said. There was silence. Neither of us knew
how to react or respond.

I
finally broke the ice, “I’m heading off to bed. Thank you
for stepping up for me,” I finished.