Darque Wants (31 page)

              “Yes, mom!” Anna said for the thousandth time today. “I have everything, I promise.” Anna and her mother stood in the center of her dorm room. The boxes lined the cream-painted cinder-block wall and covered the little twin bed in the corner.

              “Ok, ok, God!” Her mother said with exasperation. “I just want to be sure.”

              “Mom, I'm only two hours away. If I need anything, you can always bring it to me,” Anna said with her hands fixed firmly on her hips in what she was sure was a very mature fashion.

              “Oh, only two hours?” her mother asked with a crooked smile on her face. “What? Do you think I have nothing better to do than drop everything and drive two hours here and two hours back because you forgot your tooth brush?” Meredith took out her keys and swung them around her finger playfully. “I guess you didn't know your old mom has plans. The house all to myself and no one to worry about. I may just have some guy over.”

              “Sure mom,” Anna cracked back. “I'm sure you will have a line of guys.”

              “Oh, now what, are you saying your mom's a hussy?” Meredith coughed back in mock offense. “Or are you trying to be a little smarty pants and say I can't get a man to come over and play monopoly with me ‘cause I'm too old?”

              “Monopoly?” Anna asked. “Really? You've been single way too long. No one plays monopoly any more. They...”

              “Hush!” Meredith snapped, cramming her finger to Anna's lips. “Just stop right there. Leaving for college is one thing, but I'm not ready to hear that from my little girl just yet.”

              “What?” Anna asked coyly. “I was going to say they play Call Of Duty. You have a dirty mind. Maybe you will have a guy over.” Anna laughed.

              “Well, not likely,” her mother retorted. “I don't even know what Call Of Duty is,” she said as her shoulders dropped with a slight huff of surrender. “Ok, then. That settles it. Call me if you need your toothbrush, I guess.”

              “Oh Mom, you're not too old,” Anna said wrapping her mom in a tight hug. “Just Google it. That's what I did,” She said playfully. “Now you have to get out of her before my roommate gets here! Go, go, go!”

              “I'm going, I'm going,” Meredith said as Anna shoved her towards the door. “Just kicking out your old mom before she embarrasses you in front of your new college friends. I see how it is.”

              “Yes, Mom.” Anna said. “That's it.”

              Twenty minutes later, Meredith was leaning out the car window in the crowded parking lot. She was still checking off a list out loud of things she wanted to make sure Anna had as she backed out of the lot.  As Anna waved goodbye for the millionth time, something caught her attention out of the corner of her eyes. Anna had her hand in the air still half waving as she turned her head towards the library. Anna suddenly froze as she saw him standing there by the steps to the old building. It was definitely him. She knew his tall frame. She knew that smooth black suit and his ruggedly handsome face. But those eyes. She knew those eyes, and that's what made her nervous.

              “I love you, Anna!” Meredith called out as she pulled from the lot. Anna's head snapped back towards her mother's call. Her hand still held high, and her fingers started to grow numb. She waved a little more enthusiastically. Anna watched the Volvo pull away, and then she immediately turned back towards the library.

              “Shit!” She whispered to herself as she scanned the ocean of faces moving in all directions across the quad. He was nowhere to be seen. She wondered if she had seen him at all. Standing in the grass intently searching, the campus was in motion around her. Everyone was in a hurry. Parents doing their best not to leave. Students doing their best to get them to. Everyone seemed to be in a hurry around her. As she looked further down the grassy knoll where she stood, Anna suddenly noticed someone. Not him, no, but someone who seemed for some reason just as interesting. Another student was standing perfectly still as the rest of the students flurried around her. Her eyes were fixed on the library steps too.

              Anna quickly followed her gaze back to the step and saw nothing at all. Looking back, she noticed the girl was very similar to her, a thin but shapely girl with long flowing black hair and creamy white skin. The same skin Anna always cursed when Judy tanned and she burst into flames at the beach. The girl looked, well, she looked spooked just like Anna, and she was desperately looking for something. The girl's eyes turned and for a moment they locked on Anna's. A strange feeling of exposure flooded over Anna as she stood transfixed in the strangers gaze. Anna felt embarrassed but couldn't put her finger on why. A crowd passed between them, breaking their mutual connection. Anna struggled to see the girl through the moving people. As they passed, she caught sight of her walking away behind a brick wall. For some reason she didn't want the girl to leave. She wanted her Mom to come back. Standing in the grassy knoll surrounded by strangers, it hit her that she was actually, for the first time, alone. A strange quiet panic set in as the reality washed over her. She ached for something familiar, even that damn squeaky floor board that had foiled more than one attempt to sneak past her mom’s room in the middle of the night.

*****

              Anna was unpacking her boxes and surrounding herself with her things when she heard the knock.

              “Hello.” The voice came from the opening doorway as she turned. Anna stopped, instantly frozen in place. Standing in her door way was the same girl from the commons that she had been staring at earlier. The girl seemed just as shocked as a rush of blush flushed over her face. “Hi, uhm.” She struggled to find words. “I, uh is this room 121?”

              “Yeah,” Anna said as both girls stood still trying not to look one another in the face. A moment passed quietly. Then another came and replaced it before running away as well. Finally, Anna cleared her throat, a sound that seemed to fill the little room like a cannon shot. “Yeah, 121,” she said, finally making a move to reach out her hand. “I'm Anna, nice to meet you.” The other girl slowly reached up her hand and took hold of Anna's. Her hand felt frail and cool as she gripped Anna's fingers.

              “Uhm hi, I'm Kate,” she said as she started to warm up a bit. “Kat. Well my friends call me Kat.” The blush faded from her cheeks, and they re-assumed the almost porcelain hue they were naturally.

              “Well, I guess it's Kat, then,” Anna said, letting the uneasiness slip away. “I mean, hopefully we will be friends. I mean, I guess you're my roommate.”

              “Yeah, I think we will be friends, I mean, or it's gonna be a long semester,” Kat said with a slightly forced chuckle.

              “Here, let me help you,” Anna said as she grabbed one of the big bags sitting at the edge of the doorway. She couldn't help but wonder where Kat's parents were or the rest of her stuff. All the girl seemed to have was a pack over her shoulder and two big suitcases in the hallway. “So how long have you been here?” she asked as she dragged one suitcase into the room. “I saw you out on the knoll by the parking lot a little while ago, did your parents already leave?”

              “Yea, I think I saw you too,” Kat said as she pulled the other suitcase into the room and tossed her bag on the empty bed. “I, uhm,” she said hesitantly. “I was dropped off by someone from the home.”

              “From the home?” Anna thought to herself.

              “I don't really have, you know, parents,” Kat said leaving Anna feeling completely awkward. “My parents died when I was young, and I grew up in a group home in Fredericksburg.”

              “Yes, it's official,” Anna thought. “I'm a total bitch.”

              “So how about you, did your parents bring you?” Kat asked realizing the silence had started to reappear. “I thought I saw you waving to someone out there.”

              “Oh yeah,” Anna said. “My mom. My dad died when I was five too, but I don't really remember much about it, so you know.” A little lie, Anna did remember something she just wasn't sure how much of it was real and how much was a five-year-old's imagination. But she felt awkward enough as it was, so she let it go.

              “You were five?” Kat asked, looking at Anna coolly for a moment. “I was five when my parents died, too,” she said. The two once again found themselves standing quietly as they tried not to stare at one another. Finally, Kat raised her arms and flopped back on the bed suddenly. “Oh God!” she exclaimed as she closed her eyes and made snow angels on the sheets. “A real bed. The beds at the home were like two feet wide, I swear.”

              “Yep, bitch of the year,” Anna thought having reacted the exact opposite to the little single bed that seemed a cot almost, compared to her king sized bed at home. This was going to be a long semester indeed. Anna never felt like she was spoiled, but the line of cardboard boxes compared to Kat's three bags, running her mom off the way she did, and now the bed just made her feel small. “So what kind of music do you like?” Anna asked, not really knowing what direction things were going in and simply wanting to move past this phase of the conversation. She bounced over to one of her boxes and pulled out the speaker for her phone and quickly set it up. “No more uncomfortable silence here, baby,” she thought as the music started playing.

              Once the music started, the two girls seem to settle in. Anna helped Kat put away her clothes and invited her to decorate the whole room with the massive amount of crap she had brought. She made sure to balance it out, putting posters over Kat's bed and little knick knacks on her bedside table. She felt kind of guilty but honestly wanted to make her new roomy feel welcome and at home. Partly because she herself really wanted to feel at home as soon as possible, too. The two girls laughed and swapped high school horror stories as they got comfortable with one another before finally heading off to the cafeteria to get some dinner. “It was nice not to be alone,” Anna thought, as they walked back from the dining hall. She wondered if Kat felt the same or if she was just used to it. With the tiny room properly decked out in Hello Kitty posters and plushies, the two girls slipped into their beds to get some sleep before registration began the next day. Anna pulled out the night light her mom had given her that morning and slipped it into the socket by the bed but then felt stupid about it as she looked up at Kat.

              “Don't worry,” Kat said with a chuckle. “I've got my protector too.” She reached into her bag and pulled out an old and slightly dilapidated dream catcher. She carefully straightened the feathers that dangled from its sides and lifted it up to rest hanging from a hook just over her bed. “And hey, yours will keep us from busting our ass when we have to pee in the middle of the night.”

              “Yeah,” Anna said with a nervous laugh as she pushed the button on the little teddy bear shaped light. “Ok, so I guess, sleep tight.”

              “Sleep tight. Don't let the bed bugs bite,” Kat said, and both girls giggled as they snuggled down under their blankets.

              Anna wiggled around a bit not really comfortable in her new pajamas. She had been sleeping naked for years and didn't like the way they made her feel confined. But with a roommate, she figured that it was the best plan. So she did what she could to get comfortable and then drifted off to sleep.

              Anna pulled against the leather around her wrists as his mouth began to slip down below her breasts. It made her flush with nervousness to be bound this way, completely at his mercy. Her slim white legs were spread out to the sides, each bound in leather, like her wrists. And his lips teased her skin, his fingers clutched her aching nipples, rolling them with a slight pinch every time he kissed at her stomach. She arched her neck to look down at him. His dark empty eyes still gazed up over her breasts at her as his mouth teased her belly button. His tongue flickered inside it with a tickle as he suddenly squeezed her nipple hard.

              “God!” Anna called out as her back arched off the bed. Her hands wrapped tightly around the leather straps as she tugged with all her strength. The painful pleasure of his torturing fingers raced through her nipples and into her body causing her to convulse, as a stream of grunting sounds galloped from her open mouth. Her eyes were closed, but she could feel him. She could sense his presence on her, his hands working her tender nipples, the heat of his breath on her stomach as his rough chin rubbed against her belly just above her throbbing lips. But it was more than his closeness, more than the intimacy of having him above her. She could feel him instinctively somehow. She knew him.

              “Fuck!” She cried out, “Oh God, yes!” as a bolt of lightning shot through her body. His mouth sank down between her legs as his hands dragged down over her exposed stomach. His lips quickly wrapped around her pulsing clit and sucked it deeply into his mouth. His savage tongue attached it wildly, thrashing about like a swarm of bees. Anna's ass lifted up from the bed, forcing itself towards him, feeding herself to him in a way she had never known was possible. His hands wrapped under her hips and cupped her ass tightly, pulling her even deeper into his devouring mouth. The rhythm of his lips drawing on her clit, his tongue lashing across it made Anna's head pound like a drum as she writhed back and forth on the bed. His fingers dug into the soft flesh of her ass harshly, pulling her tender cheeks apart and exposing her tiny and most private places as his mouth drove her insane. She could feel his breath panting like lapping flames against her. She could feel his unshaven face scratching at the inside of her thighs. Every muscle in her body ached for release.

              “Oh shit! God!” she screamed. She felt the low bass-like vibrations as he growled into her core. She could hear the wet sounds of his face ravaging her and the low rumble of his throat growling in bursts as he dragged her body up off the bed and drove his face hard into her. Her back arched, and her arms and legs pulled at the leather bonds. Her head fell back, and her eyes clamped so tightly shut that she saw flashes of white on the backs of her eyelids. “I'm going to cum. Shit!” she screamed.

              “Oh, fuck, me too!” she heard and her eyes burst open and she jerked her head to the side. She couldn't make sense of it as her body was raging toward orgasm like never before. Just a few feet away, laying on a raised stone draped with cloth she saw Kat. Her new roommate was stripped naked with her hands and ankles bound just like Anna was herself. She saw a dark figure hovering over her, his hands under her hips lifting her body up as his face tossed frantically between her legs. Kat's eyes were looking right at Anna but in a hollow drunken stare. He, body was soaked with sweat that rolled down her firm breasts and dripped onto the stone as her whole body shook violently. Kat's mouth hung open as a string of crying moans trailed from inside her. Suddenly, Kat's body jerked and went rigid. “Fuck!” trailed out of her mouth in one long cracking tone as her hips bucked wildly against the dark figures face.

              The confusion and near panic simply made Anna's blood rush that much harder to her head. She could feel her body and knew she looked exactly like Kat just had as she began to convulse frantically. It took all her strength to keep her eyes open as she watched Kat lay back against the stone, limp as the figure rose up and turned his face toward Anna. Her body jumped against the straps and every muscle in her body clamped down so hard they felt as if they burst. “Ahhh!” She could hear her voice echoing off the walls as she looked at the stranger's face come into the light. It was him. It was her stranger, leaning up from between Kat's thighs dripping with her on his lips. Anna's eyes darted around frantically. There were others standing around them, watching, all the same or at least so much alike that it didn't matter. Anna's heart pounded as her orgasm ripped through her like never before. She couldn't take it this time. It was too much. Her body broke and collapsed as it jerked violently. Her mouth was dry as bursts of grunting sounds came from inside her. She clamped her eyes shut. She didn't understand. She couldn't understand anything until she rode through the waves crashing inside her.

              Suddenly, Anna sat up in her bed grasping at the sheets. She was awake. She was in her dorm. And she could feel the pajamas soaked between her legs. In the pale blue light of the nightlight, she turned to see if she had woken up Kat. Her body shivered like winter when she turned her head to see Kat sitting up in bed, too. She was clutching her sheets and panting as if she was out of breath. The mirror image of Anna, in fact. Sweat dripped from her forehead as her hands held the blanket to her chest. The two girls could barely see one another in the low light of the nightlight. But they could see enough. They stared at each other again like earlier by the knoll. But this time they both knew something was different.

              Then the embarrassment started to settle in as Anna realized they both had just had an orgasm. Despite the million reasons to be freaked out, somehow that fact made Anna feel more exposed than anything else. She quickly turned her back towards Kat and laid back down pulling the covers up to her chin. Her body was still recovering. Her empty channel throbbed between her closed legs. Her new pajamas obviously were headed to the laundry already, as she could feel the moisture that had spread down her thighs and covering her ass. She clamped her eyes shut just hoping whatever was happening would go away.

              “Anna.” She barely heard the meek little call from the other side of the room. “Anna?” Kat's voice came again a little louder. So there was no way Anna could act like she didn't hear.

              “Yeah?” Anna managed to respond through her dry throat.

              “You ok?” her roommate asked nervously.

              “Yeah,” she responded. “You?”

              “I guess, yeah I'm ok,” Kat said as she, too, pulled the sheets up and tried to curl up in a little ball despite the cooling wetness of the sweat and moisture in her bed.

              “It's just the stress,” Anna piped in. “That's what my mom says. It's the stress of going to college. Just get some sleep. Tomorrow is a big day.” She tried to reassure herself more than Kat really. But there was something about it that made her feel responsible for making Kat feel secure. “It's just the stress.” She said again trying to sound more confident. “Everything's going to be ok.”

              “Ok,” Kay said quietly as she lay still shivering in her bed. “Thanks. Goodnight,” she said as she pulled the blanket over her head to warm up.

              “Night,” Anna responded as she pulled the sheets in closer and gripped them tightly. The two girls lay there each silently wondering what the other was thinking, what was going on, until they finally drifted back into sleep.

*****