Finding Cassie Crazy (24 page)

That way I'll recognise the smell.

When?

Seb

Hey Seb
I'm enclosing a sachet of the perfume that Cass is going to spill all over her letter to Matthew Dunlop today. I was hoping writing the letter would make her feel better. But she doesn't look better to me.

Whoever he is, he should get the letter in the next couple of days, depending on how often he checks his mail.

See ya
Lyd

Dear Matthew Dunlop
Did the words of my letters really hurt your eyes that much?

I'm just writing to let you know that your plan didn't work. If you were trying to make me fall for you or something? I didn't. Matthew Dunlop wasn't all that attractive.

Anyway, I won't write again, and I'm guessing I won't hear from you. Now that you've gone ahead and carried out your ingenious plan. It makes me wonder why you would bother but, I guess, whatever turns you on.

Bye then
Cassie

Thursday

Dear Emily
Well, it was nice chatting with you near the school gate yesterday afternoon. It's a shame you couldn't come have coffee with me, as per my suggestion because, bugger me, it was cold. But you were cute as ever, and I hope I did well at Saying Hello to a Girl I Met by Chance.

I'm enclosing the year photo from last year. Sorry it took me a couple of days to track it down. I don't have the type of family who put photos in frames on the mantelpiece. We have a coffee table made out of hub caps and on the coffee table there's a humorous picture of Jess being chased by a rooster. That's it.

Anyhow, I hope the photo helps. As I said to you yesterday, I'd like to meet your friends Lyd and Cass some time, and maybe let Cass know that there are good guys at Brookfield as well.

You will see that there are names underneath the photo so if Cass figures out which face is his, she can match him up with a name.

I notice that there are a few guys in my year with the initials ‘MD' and maybe that's a clue. This guy might have been using his own
initials
. See Mario D'Angelo and Malcolm Dong, for example.

Love
Charlie

Friday

Dear Lyd
Here's an update.

Matthew Dunlop: 1

Seb Mantegna: 0

As of today, I can see no letter addressed to Matthew Dunlop in the Ashbury letterbox here.

I'm guessing Cass sent it on Wednesday as you said, and
I'm guessing Dunlop's taken it. And I've been sniffing out the guys in my English class (to the extent that this is possible without getting my throat cut), but they smell the same way they always do: like feet and testicles. As opposed to freesias.

I don't want to keep sniffing them, Lyd.

I did think I could be a kind of goalkeeper for you and just guard the letterbox until ‘Matthew' showed up. But I had to go to classes. Also, goalkeepers tend to be stupid people.

It could be he chucked the letter away without reading it, before the smell got a chance to infiltrate. Or it could be that he ingeniously took a shower while he read it.

Whatever he's done, it was a nice manoeuvre and you've got to admire his footwork. Me? I hope you have a good weekend and I am very sorry I have failed you.

Seb

Dear Charlie
I would like to begin by giving you full marks for Saying Hello to a Girl You Met by Chance. When I saw you standing there at the gate, you got such a genuine surprised look, but on the other hand, it was restrained. In particular, you stayed very still, leaning against the fence, and allowed your eyes and your little smile to provide the look.

Now, furthermore, I liked your conversation, which was relaxed and I only wish I had thought of things to talk about in advance as I suddenly got tongue-tied, as you may have noticed. And this would have surprised you perhaps as I am not normally tongue-tied, am I? No. And I'm sorry we didn't have coffee as you suggested. It would have been jumping the
gun. And I was a bit scared of continuing tongue-tied, to speak the truth.

I would like to continue this letter by expressing my gratitude to you for tracking down the photo and sending it over. That is real thoughtfulness, and Cass also says you must be a nice guy to do that. Although she wishes I hadn't told you about ‘Matthew Dunlop' (MD) as she is embarrassed about it, and poor Cass, there is nothing to be embarrassed about. But she is.

Now, the sad thing is that Cass looked at the photo and she didn't recognise MD.

(You know, that makes me think: ‘MD' means doctor, I believe. So maybe it is a clue in that way? Is there a hopeful young doctor in your English class? Someone who likes blood, for instance, or sewing? Do you know such a person?) I was a bit amazed that she didn't recognise him, but then I looked at the photo closely and I couldn't even see YOU. Not for AGES. I had to find your name in the list of names and match it up with the face, and your face looked so teeny and your mouth was curious. It did not do you justice, I am sorry.

The next thing to do might be to create an IDENTIKIT photo. I will find somebody artistic in my year and Cass can describe MD, and the person will sketch him and I can send it over to you.

Cass is a bit dubious, but I am sure you agree it is just the idea.

Best regards
Em