Finding Divine (11 page)

“Would you shut the hell up for a minute and listen? For once this isn’t about you.”

Simon ground his teeth together, holding back an angry retort. “Fine. What is it you’re calling me for?”

“Your father had a heart attack. It’s not looking good.”

He didn’t know what he’d been expecting but it definitely wasn’t that. Despite him not having the best relationship with his parents, he didn’t wish either of them harm.

“Where is he now?”

“
Mercy Hospital.”

Simon didn’t know what to say. He felt numb. “I’m not sure what you want me to say.”

“How about you’re on your way to the hospital?”

“Negative. I’m busy. Do you think his heart attack negated everything? I’m not going to be a hypocrite and pretend everything is hunky-dory between the two of us. I’m sure he’ll appreciate that I’ve remained consistent.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? Your sister, who lives in Paris by the way, is taking the next available flight home, and you can’t drive the forty minutes or so it will take you to make it to the hospital?”

Simon refused to be moved. “That about sums it up.”

“You selfish asshole! Your mother is in hysterics. Your father might not make it and you’re still butt hurt because Daddy didn’t love you enough. I get it, man, Uncle Harold wasn’t the best father, but it’s time for you to get over that shit. My father who has bent over backward for you is beside himself right now because he’s facing the prospect of losing his little brother. At the very least you owe it to him to come, so if you don’t get your ass over here I’m going to drive to your house and beat the shit out of you then drag you to the hospital myself. So what’s it going to be?”

Pete had never talked to him like that before and he was taken aback by the outburst. As tempted as Simon was to hang up and end the conversation, deep down he realized his cousin had made some valid points. If for no other reason than to support his uncle, he had to go to the hospital. He let out a heavy sigh. “Okay. I’m on my way.”

“Gee, thanks,” Pete’s voice dripped with sarcasm.

“Pete—”

“I gotta go. I need to make some more calls.” Pete clicked off before Simon could say another word.

Simon slammed the phone back on the receiver. “Shit.” He felt terrible about upsetting his cousin but Pete had no idea what he’d been through, no matter how much he believed he knew about the situation. Eventually he’d work himself back into his cousin’s good graces, but for now he had to deal with the issue at hand. He sighed again, raking his fingers through his hair.

Reluctantly, Simon headed outside to break the news to Jessica. She was no longer in the hammock. Instead, she paced backed and forth, her face etched with concern. He wondered what could have happened in the few minutes it had taken him to speak to Pete.

“Sweetheart, is everything okay?”

Apparently Jessica had been so deep in thought she jumped when he approached her. “Sorry about that,” she responded, not answering his question.

He’d have to find out later, but now, he needed to get to the city. “Jess, I hate to do this, but I need to go. I just got a call from Pete.”

“Is something the matter?”

“My father had a heart attack and I need to go.”

Jessica pulled him into her arms and gave him a quick hug. “Oh, Simon, I’m so sorry to hear that. Of course I’ll come with you.”

He didn’t want to expose her to his dysfunctional family just yet. “You don’t have to; besides, don’t you have to open your shop in the morning? I don’t know how long this is going to take.”

She grasped his hands and looked at him in earnest. “I’ll just have to go in late. I can call Ellie to work something out. This is more important.”

“I…I’m not sure if it would be a good idea for you to be there. Things are kind of strained with my parents as you know, so it may not be comfortable for you.”

“But I’m not going for them, I’m going for you. I’m not taking no for an answer.”

He couldn’t have loved her more in that moment. Knowing Jessica would be at the hospital soothed him. Taking her face in his hands, Simon gave her a long deep kiss. “Thank you. I really appreciate this.” A grin tugged at the corner of his mouth. “You know, since you’ll be formally meeting my family, it would be nice to introduce them to my fiancé.”

Jessica rolled her eyes with a laugh. “You don’t give up, do you?”

“Not when it’s something I want very badly.”

“Like I said, I’ll give this some thought, but there are a few things we have to discuss first.”

“Does it have anything to do with your pacing back and forth when I came out here?”

“Yes, but it can wait.”

“If there’s something that’s bothering you, I want to know about it.”

“Simon, shouldn’t we be getting on the road? I’m sure your family is expecting you soon. Let’s go.”

“We’ll go to see my father, but right now I want to find out what’s wrong with you.”

“And I told you that we’ll talk about it later. You have enough on your mind to worry about without something this silly.”

To keep his frustration at bay, Simon mentally counted to three before speaking. “Jessica, obviously whatever was on your mind is bothering you, so it’s not silly. If something affects you it affects me too. We can stand here all day if you’d like, but we’re not going anyway until you tell me.”

“You’re not being fair.”

“Neither are you. I see you’re upset about something but you won’t let me in. Please, whatever it is, we can deal with it together, okay?”

She nibbled on her bottom lip, her uncertainty still apparent. Simon wanted to take her in his arms to reassure her, but knew where that would lead. “You might be mad at me.”

“I could never be angry with you.”

“Simon, remember when I told you at the shore it was okay to have sex without protection?”

He tensed. “Yes.”

“I was pretty sure it would be okay. I was positive, actually. We’ve been very careful since then and I thought everything was okay. When you went inside to get condoms, it occurred to me that my period has been a little dodgy lately”

“What do you mean by ‘dodgy’?”

“Last month it was really light and only lasted a day. I didn’t think much of it but this month, I realize I’m late. That never happens because it always comes like clockwork. I’ve been so wrapped up with us, I didn’t think much of it.”

“So do you think…”

“I don’t know. It may be too early to tell, but the possibility is there. I messed up. I really messed up.” She burst into tears, and he pulled her into his arms.

“Shh, it will be okay, baby. Whatever happens, I’m here for you.” He buried his face in her neck to hide the smile forming on his lips. He was a selfish bastard for even thinking it but Simon hoped to God she was pregnant.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Jessica sat next to Pete, waiting for some word on Simon’s father. She’d been in the hospital for over an hour hoping for the ER doctor to give them some word that everything would be okay. Hospitals made her nervous, and being around a roomful of people didn’t help. She doubted she’d be able to handle the situation as well without Simon by her side. Jessica clenched her hands in her lap and tried to focus on calming thoughts to avoid a possible attack. It helped that no one was in a talkative mood. She’d already met Pete and found him the friendliest of Simon’s family. Penelope and Stuart Lange were kind but reserved, as if they were holding off judgment until they got to know her better.

Simon’s mother had given her a tight smile, and murmured polite words, but Jessica could tell the woman wasn’t exactly pleased to see her there. She didn’t know if it was because Mrs. Lange felt that Jessica was intruding on a family thing, or didn’t approve of her in general. Whether she met with the woman’s approval or not, Jessica intended to remain by Simon as long as he needed her.

When Simon excused himself to go to the restroom, which she suspected was an excuse to get away from his mother’s longing stares, Jessica’s pulse raced and her breathing grew shallow. She squeezed her eyes shut and murmured a chant to stave off the panic she felt on the horizon. It took several moments before she felt calm enough to move. Jessica decided to strike up a conversation with Pete to give her something to concentrate on. 

She moved two seats over to be closer to the Pete. “Hi, Pete.”

He turned his warm brown eyes her way. “Hi Jessica. It was nice of you to come with Simon. I’m sure it means a lot to him as it does the rest of us.”

“Are you sure about that? I kind of get the impression that I’m intruding.”

“Not at all. This is just a stressful time for our family and everything is tense. Under different circumstances your welcome would have been much warmer.”

“Okay. I’ll take your word for it. Pete?”

“Yeah?”

She lowered her voice so no one else could hear but Pete. “Simon doesn’t really talk about it but it’s pretty clear he doesn’t have the best relationship with his parents. What’s going on with them?”

Pete laughed humorlessly, raking fingers through his black hair. “If Simon hasn’t told you yet, I don’t know if I should either. It’s really not my story to tell.”

“I know, but I’m so tired of being left in the dark. Simon and I have been together for a couple of months now, and he practically cringes when the subject of family comes up. I’m just trying to understand.”

“I see where you’re coming from, but really, you’ll have to talk to Simon about it. Let’s just say it’s going to take some time and forgiveness to heal wounds that have been festering for years.”

“I see.” Jessica murmured, not really seeing at all. “I’d be thankful for any little tidbit you could offer. Maybe I could help him.”

Pete must have read stubborn determination in her eyes, because he sighed. “Well, the only thing I can really say is that my Uncle Harold can be a rigid man at times. No one likes to admit they’re wrong, but my uncle especially. He doesn’t like to be reminded of his mistakes and sometimes he goes a bit overboard in dealing with those mistakes.”

Jessica scrunched her nose. She was more confused than before she asked him. “I’m not sure I follow.”

“Well, as you’ve probably realized, Simon can be quite stubborn when he digs his heels in. My uncle has made some mistakes and Simon was hurt by them. It caused him to act out and it led to something that haunts Simon every day of his life. He blames Uncle Harold for some of his issues but honestly, he mainly blames himself, and until he learns to forgive himself he can’t forgive anyone else.”

“What happened?” Jessica wanted to know.

Pete shook his dark head. “I can’t tell you. When Simon is ready, I’m sure he will.”

“Fair enough, but what do you think I can do to help him?”

Pete smiled, patting her on the knee in a reassuring gesture. “Just be there for him. If anyone deserves happiness, God knows its Simon. It’s mine and my parents’ wish that they’ll all come together and make real peace one day instead of this hostile civility.”

“I hope so too. It’s sad to see the rift between Simon and his mother firsthand. It’s obvious that she really wants to have a good relationship with her son.”

“Yes, like I said, it’ll take a little time but hopefully they’ll get there.”

“What are you two talking about?” Simon walked over to them, interrupting the conversation.

Jessica glanced his way to see a stormy expression in his light eyes. “Nothing. We were just talking,” said Jessica, hastily standing up and taking his hand.

Simon glared at his cousin then focused his attention on her. “Are you sure it was nothing because it sounded like something, and I could have sworn I heard my name mentioned.”

Pete’s face was bright red. Jessica didn’t understand why Simon was so upset since Pete hadn’t really revealed anything. She’d already deduced before coming here that Simon didn’t get along with his parents. “Yes, we were talking about you. I was just a little bit concerned so I was just asking about your family is all. Pete didn’t give away any of your secrets if that’s what you’re wondering.”

“Let’s keep it that way,” he muttered, still glaring at Pete. “I need some air. Will you come with me, Jess?”

She frowned, but nodded her head. What had gotten into him? He took her hand in his, gripping it a little harder than she thought necessary, but she didn’t protest.

Once they were outside the hospital doors, Simon pulled her into his arms and smashed his mouth against hers. His sudden forcefulness took Jessica by surprise, but as always, her body went up in flames with just a mere touch from him. His tongue demanded entrance and she parted her lips for him, welcoming the onslaught of passion she knew only Simon could unleash.