Forever and Always (24 page)

“
Come for me,
babe.”

“
I am.”

“
Come on.” He kissed my
lips and I gripped his back with sharp nails. Luckily, he still had
his shirt on.

I felt the explosion hit me. “I’m
coming.”

“
I love you.”

“
Sean.” I moaned.
“Babe.”

“
I love you more than
anything.”

“
Sean, I love you
too.”

My orgasm ended and I felt the air
return to my lungs. Sean pulled his fingers out of me then kissed
me gently. I waited for him to remove his pants but he didn’t. He
sat next to me on the bed.

He got off me and I sighed. “You must
be gay.”

“
Or just madly in
love.”

“
No,” I said. “You’re
gay.”

Sean laughed. “I’ll prove you wrong
eventually.”

“
Can we still sleep
together?” I asked.

“
I assumed we would
tonight—fully dressed, of course.”

“
We’ll see,” I said.
“There are things I can do that will make you lose control. You
won’t be able to be such a gentleman.”

Sean walked back to me and leaned over
me. “I don’t think you understand how hard this is for me,” he
said. “Please respect my wishes and don’t try to seduce me. You’re
right—I won’t be able to resist you—so please don’t compromise me.
I am only doing this because I love you—that’s it.”

I stared at the sincerity in his eyes
and immediately felt guilty for deciding to test his limits. I
wanted to make love to Sean, but I knew this was important to him.
If he didn’t care about me like any other girl, then he would sleep
with me, but since he actually loved me, he wouldn’t. I grabbed his
face and kissed him gently. “I won’t,” I said. “I’m sorry I was
being such a slut.”

Sean laughed loudly then hugged me.
“Thank you,” he said. “After we get past this, you can be as much
of a slut as you want. In fact, a bigger slut is always
better.”

“
But only for you,
right?”

“
Yes,” he said. “Only for
me.

Epilogue

Six months later, Sean officially
asked me to move in with him. While I was happy that he decided we
were ready for this new stage in our relationship, I was also
confused. We still hadn’t slept together. Against my strong desire
for the love of life, I respected his wishes and did the best I
could not compromise him by making a sexual advance on him. We had
gotten carried away a few times when I slept over, but one of us
would stop our actions before they escalated into something more.
There were times when I knew Sean had no control over his emotions,
and he would have slept with me if I didn’t calm him down by
stopping him. More often, it was me that lost control and crossed
the lines that Sean had drawn. So, when he asked me to move in, I
assumed that meant Sean knew I was ready for a physical
relationship.

When I told Ryan I was moving, he
seemed genuinely happy about it. Our apartment was only a few
blocks from his, so we would still see each other on a regular
basis. Janice was still living with him and Ryan seemed happier
than ever. I suspected he was going to propose soon, but he hadn’t
said anything to me. I knew he would tell me when he
decided.

Cortland helped us move my belongings
in his car, which didn’t take very many trips since I didn’t own
very many things. The furniture in my room was already there when I
arrived.

Cortland helped me carry my belongings
into the living room and we set the boxes wherever there was space
available.

“
Let’s grab some lunch,”
Cortland said to both of us.

I had no interest in spending time
with Cortland now that I knew Sean was willing to take our
relationship to the next level, but Sean answered before I could
respond.

“
I have some work to do,
but take Scarlet with you. I’ll be finished by the time you get
back.”

I glared at him. “You have
work to do
now
?”

“
Yes.” He smiled as he
kissed me on the head. “Have fun.”

Cortland walked out the door and I
followed him. We got in the car and drove to the same deli we went
to many months earlier. When we were eating our food, Cortland
wiped his mouth and spoke.

“
He still hasn’t given it
up?” he asked with a smile.

“
You can tell?”

He laughed. “The sexual frustration is
leaking out of your pores right now. I can see it.”

“
Thanks.”

“
That’s rough. I don’t
think I could stay with a girl if she made me wait that long. I’m
glad Monnique was classy, but not too classy.”

“
How are you
two?”

“
Great,” he said. “I’m
going to ask her to move in.”

“
That’s
exciting.”

“
I know,” he said. “I
would propose, but I don’t think she’s ready. I want this
relationship to move forward, but I don’t want to rush her. I think
moving in together is a good step.”

“
I do too.”

“
Now that you’re moving
in, he’ll put out,” he said. “Don’t worry about it.”

“
He better,” I said.
“Otherwise I’m going to rape him.”

Cortland laughed. “I don’t think it’s
possible for you to rape anyone.”

“
I feel like it
sometimes,” I said. “How he can wait this long is beyond my
comprehension.”

“
I think he is just trying
to prove himself,” he said. “I have to give him recognition for
that. He is determined to make this relationship a
success.”

I finished my food and pushed it away.
Cortland was already done, but he was waiting for me to
finish.

“
Are you ready?” he
asked.

“
Yes,” I said. “I am going
to seduce Sean as soon as I get home.”

Cortland laughed as he grabbed our
trash and threw it away. “I have a feeling that you are going to be
successful,” he said. “If not, the guy is gay.”

Cortland opened the door for me and we
drove back to the apartment.

“
He is definitely
not
gay,” I said. “He is
just determined.”

“
Well, he’s got some
powerful motivation.” He stopped at a red light then turned left.
“Did you hear about Carl?”

“
What about him?” I asked
with interest.

“
Apparently, not only are
some of the other women from the office coming forward and suing
him, but the company is as well. I have a feeling you are going to
get more money out of this.”

“
I don’t care about that,”
I said.

“
Well, he’s going to be in
jail for a long time, if that makes your day.”

I smiled. “It does.”

“
And you know what Sean
told me?”

I raised an eyebrow. He told me
everything. “What?”

“
Penelope had her
baby.”

Now I knew why he didn’t mention it.
“Oh.”

“
But guess who she tricked
into marrying her?”

I had no idea. “Who?”

“
Brian.” He started
laughing. “Man, that guy is an idiot.”

I started laughing hysterically. “He
was never very bright.”

We got out of the car and Cortland
walked me to the door. When I got my key in the lock, he walked
away. “Good luck with the art of seduction,” he said over his
shoulder.

“
Thanks.” I
laughed.

When I walked into the living room,
Sean wasn’t there. All the lights were out like he hadn’t been in
the room the whole time.

“
I’m in the bedroom,” Sean
yelled down the hall.

I followed his voice and walked down
the hall until I reached the bedroom. I saw the flickering lights
and the dancing shadows as I walked inside. There were white
candles that covered every surface in the bedroom, and the dim
light from their wicks made the room glow by its own luminescence.
White rose pedals were sprinkled on the ground and on top of the
bed, making it the most romantic sight I’ve ever seen. Sean stepped
out of the corner and stood in front of me.

“
I want this to be
perfect,” he said as he pressed his forehead against
mine.

“
It’s beautiful,
Sean.”

Sean was holding a large yellow
envelope in his hands. “I want you to open this.”

I stared at the package for a moment
before I opened it. It was a bound manuscript.

“
Read it to me,” he
said.

“
What
?”

“
I want to hear it,” he
said. “It looks interesting. And I love the sound of your
voice.”

Sean had never taken an
interest in my work. He was interested simply because it was my
passion, but he never picked up manuscripts and read them for
pleasure. I opened the first page and read the
acknowledgement.
For
Scarlet
, it read. I thought it was a weird
coincidence, but I didn’t overthink it.

I opened the first page and began to
read. “I’m not really a writer,” I said. “I just say what I think
and put in on the page, destroying a perfectly beautiful and pure
piece of paper and demolishing it with my thoughts, which are
always conflicted and confusing. And most of the time, I don’t have
anything important to say—or anything at all.

“
But this is the one
instance that I do. You see, I’m a bit of an asshole, a complete
dickhead most of the time, but I am also incredibly loyal and
loving to those who deserve it—for the most part. My story starts a
few months in the past, when I was living a blind and pathetic
existence. I had the love of a beautiful woman—or so I thought—I
had money, food, and water. Life was good. But then this bitch
betrayed me and sent me to the brink with rage. No one cared about
the pain I was in, and most of the time people didn’t even notice
how hurt I was, but there was one person who did care because she
loved me—her name is Scarlet.” My voice caught when I read this
line. I looked at Sean and he smiled to me. He nodded towards me,
encouraging me to continue.

“
But, of course, I was a
complete jerk—this is where the asshole and dickhead part comes
into play—and I used her. She was my best friend, but I slept with
her, disregarding her feelings and emotions. This girl was madly in
love with me, would do anything for me—she would even die for
me—but I was so blind I didn’t even notice. I was so self-absorbed
that I didn’t even care. It was only when I kissed her—thinking of
someone else—did I notice how beautiful she was. The feel of her
lips on mine sent shivers down my spine, giving me a rush like I
never had before. I never felt that way with anyone. Why didn’t I
notice it then?

“
No. I continued to be a
fucking idiot. I broke her heart and crushed her into pieces, and
instead of comforting her when she needed me most, when the jerk at
her office was assaulting her, I fucked her friend—someone I didn’t
even care for—rather than confront my true feelings for the most
amazing woman in the world—Scarlet. All I had to do was talk to
her, my best friend, and I tell her what I was thinking and how I
was feeling, but no, I decided to be an idiot—which I tend to be
most of the time.

“
I pushed her away, and
what was worse, I let her go. I let Scarlet go. I knew I loved her.
It was as obvious as a colored painting. Everything I saw reminded
me of her, from the flowers in the park, to the weights at the gym,
and even that weird ink stain on my paper that slightly resembled
her, but not really. It took me so long to realize what I
wanted—Scarlet. Yes, I was broken hearted over someone else,
someone that I thought I wanted to spend my life with, but in the
end, my thoughts were focused on the fire in my soul—the girl of my
dreams.

“
I went after her and it
was amazing. The sex was incredible—this heathen was a fireball in
bed—and that’s putting it lightly.” I stopped and laughed at that
part. Sean smiled at me when he saw me giggle. I continued reading.
“I loved seeing her love for me in her eyes. They shined like
beacons in the lighthouses that called lost ships to shore,
beckoning them to where they belong. Just the way she touched my
face when she kissed me made me realize I belonged to her—and her
alone. The idea of anyone else was unthinkable. What the fuck took
me so long? Saying goodbye to her at the airport was like saying
goodbye to summer every year, preparing for the harsh snow storms
that destroyed our houses and land. I never wanted to
leave.

“
This is where it went
wrong. The whore who betrayed, the one I wanted to marry, came to
me and begged me to take her back. I couldn’t deny the feelings in
my heart. She had been the one. I thought she still might be and
now she claimed to be carrying my baby. I had to be there for my
kid, make sure he had a proper family. I was stupid and idiotic,
giving this girl another chance when I never should have. I was
losing Scarlet, trading in a beautiful stallion for a mere mule,
but I wasn’t thinking clearly—I wasn’t thinking straight. I was
obviously out of my mind. I wanted Scarlet—she was the one. Stop!
What the fuck am I doing?