Give Me a Reason (12 page)

After hesitating for a moment, Laura whispered, “A few.”

“Oh, that’s just bloody great!” Toni shouted, throwing her
arms up in the air.

Before Laura had a chance to speak, Toni marched from the
room, slamming the door so hard that the glass rattled in its frame. Letting
out a sigh, Laura got to her feet. “Shit.”

Getting to her classroom, Toni angrily snagged papers from
the desk, forcing them into her briefcase as she grabbed her jacket from the
chair.

“I’m sorry if I’ve done something to make you angry,” Laura
said.

Toni’s nostrils flared as she spun to face Laura. “What
you’ve
done
is turned me into a needy child
instead of a friend!”

“No, I haven’t.”

“Oh, yes, you have! You just told me that you turned down
dates
so you can babysit me!”

“I don’t consider going out with you babysitting.”

“Oh? What do
you
call
sitting in a loo holding a paper sack over my face—a date?”

“I call it being out with a friend.”

“Well, this
friend
is going
home!” Toni said, slinging her jacket over her shoulder. “And don’t worry. You
don’t have to hold my hand. I can make it to my car just fine without you!”

Storming past Laura, Toni ran down the stairs and out the
rear door, never once looking back.

***

They stood in the small flat, watching as people no longer
needed or wanted, disappeared from view. An hour before, nosy neighbors
grumbling about being woken from their sleep were shooed back to their
apartments, the wave of plaid and flowered flannel shuffling down the hallway
and stairs, and disappearing behind dingy doors with crooked numbers. The
paramedics had also gone, ordered to leave by the victim who still cowered in
the corner of the bedroom, her visible injuries slight compared to the ones
hidden from view. The only strangers who remained were the two constables,
summoned to the building by the next-door neighbor, his frantic phone call to
report a woman screaming, bringing them to apartment 3-D almost two hours
before. They weren’t the most seasoned of officers, both younger than thirty
with freshly shaved faces and smelling of popular cologne, but it didn’t take
experience to deal with what they had faced that night; it took compassion. And
as they stood by the doorway, glancing at the two women in the lounge, the
uniformed officers looked sad and helpless. There were no witnesses to
interview and no items to report as stolen. How could they have known that what
was stolen that night was more valuable than any trinket money could buy? When
the nameless, faceless man broke in, although he left with empty hands, driven
from the apartment by the blood-curdling screams of a woman in blue pajamas, he
took with him her safety net. The only place she had felt safe…was safe no
more.

Krista’s number had been by the phone, written and posted on
the wall under the heading of
In Case of Emergency
the day Toni moved in. She was the one they had called in a panic,
professionals supposedly trained in all situations, but still unable to quiet a
victim who continued to rant and rave. How were they to know they shouldn’t
touch? How were they to know that it was their unfamiliar faces that caused her
to lash out? Striking in fury and fear, she drove them away, and by the time
Kris arrived, Toni’s screams had turned to silence.

Krista escorted the last of the officers to the door, and the
tall fellow with sandy blonde hair and blue eyes handed her his card and
offered his apologies. He had never experienced a victim so frightened of him
before that night, and her terrified screams would haunt his dreams for weeks
to come. Closing the door, Kris pulled on the knob and forced the jimmied latch
back into the keeper before turning around to face Laura.

Chapter Eleven

The lounge appeared as if it had been visited by a tornado.
The small sofa sat at an odd angle, the coffee table lay on its side, and books
covered the floor. One lamp was shattered, while the other still stood in the
corner, its yellowed shade torn open to reveal the stark brightness of a single
bulb. The intensity of its light cast long shadows across the discolored
ceiling, and as Laura looked around the room, it seemed filled with despair.
Hearing the door close, Laura looked over at Kris. “How bad is she?”

“She hasn’t moved or said a word since I got here.”

“Is she okay? I mean, physically?”

“Honestly, I don’t know. The police didn’t think she was
hurt, but no one could get near her to really check. She calmed down when she
saw me, so I just closed the bedroom door until I could get everyone out. You
know how she is around strangers.”

Bending down, Laura started to pick up some of the books and
then realized how pointless it was. “This place is a wreck. She can’t stay here.”

“I know.”

“Does she have a suitcase?”

“I think so. Why?”

“Because she’s coming home with me.”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, Laura, but she’ll be much
more comfortable at my place. She’s been there before and—”

“Are you planning to leave her alone?”

“Of course not! How could you even ask that?”

“I’m sorry, but the other day I thought Toni said you were
going on holiday.”

“Oh, crap,” Kris said. “With all the commotion, I totally
forgot about that. We fly out tomorrow afternoon.”

“So that leaves us with only one option.”

“No, it doesn’t. I’ll call Robin and have her cancel the
tickets.”

“You can’t do that.”

“Why the hell not?”

“Because earlier today, Toni found out that I had turned down
some dates. I didn’t want to disrupt our normal coffee outings by having to cut
them short, so I said no a few times. She was more than just a little angry.
She accused me of babysitting her, so if you cancel your holiday—”

“She’s going to think I’m doing the same thing.”

“Exactly.”

“Okay, so any idea how we’re going to do this?” Kris said,
heading in the direction of the bedroom.

“Absolutely none,” Laura said, following Kris to the door.
“Let’s just play it by ear.”

After glancing at Laura for a moment, Kris held her breath as
she opened the bedroom door. It was the first time Laura had seen Toni since
she arrived, and it was all Laura could do not to cry. Toni had pressed herself
into the corner of the room. Sitting on the floor with her knees pulled tight
to her chest, she was staring off into space as she lightly tapped her head
against the wall, over and over and over again.

“Find the suitcase,” Laura whispered over her shoulder as she
took a hesitant step toward Toni. It was as if she had stepped on an invisible
switch, because as soon as she took that step, Toni began knocking her head
harder against the plaster. Pained by the sound, Laura grabbed a pillow from
the bed, and slowly placed it behind Toni’s head. Unsure of what to do or what
to say, Laura knelt down and gently touched Toni’s arm. It was the wrong thing
to do.

Toni came to life in a fury, and before Laura could react,
she found herself being shoved away, the force so strong it sent her stumbling
backward across the room. With a thud, she landed at Krista’s feet.

“Christ, are you all right?” Kris asked, kneeling by her
side.

“Yes, I’m fine,” Laura said, getting to her feet.

“For a string bean, she sure is a strong bugger, isn’t she?”
Kris said with a snigger.

Laura glared at Krista. “You think this is funny?”

“Sorry. When I get nervous, I tend to make jokes.”

“Right,” Laura said, taking a deep breath. “Have you found
the suitcase?”

“No, I was too busy picking you up off the floor.”

“Krista!”

“Sorry.”

Laura looked in Toni’s direction and then back at Kris.
“Let’s try this again, shall we?”

Cautiously, Laura approached Toni again, and as carefully as
possibly, she knelt by her side making sure she wasn’t close enough for them to
touch. Concentrating on her proximity rather than the woman’s reaction, Laura
didn’t notice that Toni’s hands had turned to fists until it was too late.

In an attempt to dodge the blow, Laura scrambled to get to
her feet, but her movements were slow and Toni’s, unfortunately, were not.
Laura had never been hit before—not really. Playful slaps between friends were
one thing, but a solid punch to the jaw was quite another. Again, Laura
stumbled across the room, but this time Kris caught her before she hit the
floor.

Her Scottish temper now at a rolling boil, Laura rubbed her
jaw and gave Kris a cold, hard stare. “If you make one sodding joke—”

“Wouldn’t think of it,” Kris said, holding up her hands. “Are
you okay?”

“Oh yeah, I’m just peachy!” Laura said through clenched
teeth.

“If it means anything, I’ve never seen her like this. Back in
the day, she did have quite a temper, but that was more just shouting and
tossing books about. I don’t think she’s ever hit anyone before.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” Laura asked,
moving her jaw left and right to work out the ache.

“No, I just thought you’d want to know.” Seeing Laura take a
step in Toni’s direction, Kris pulled her back. “What are you going to do?”

“Give her a taste of her own medicine!”

Three quick steps and Laura was at Toni’s side again, but
this time, there was no hesitation. Anger set the pace, and it was quick and
unexpected. Dropping to her knees, before Toni had a chance to react, Laura
grabbed her wrists and held on tight. Eyes, now dark and smoldering with anger,
stared back at her as Toni began to struggle to free herself from Laura’s
grasp.

“Knock it off, Toni,” Laura shouted, tightening her grip.
“I’m not going to hurt you, and you know it!”

Toni continued to fight until Laura’s temper finally got the
best of her. Shoving Toni hard against the wall, Laura said, “For Christ’s
sake, stop acting like a goddamned child! I know you’re scared, and what
happened tonight was shit, but
this
isn’t
helping! I didn’t come here tonight to become a punching bag. I came here
because I’m trying to be your friend. Now, will you please just calm the fuck
down and listen to me!”

Toni tried to pull away again, but she had run out of steam
and Laura had not. Giving Laura a menacing glare, Toni stopped fighting and
rested her head against the wall.

“That’s better,” Laura said, letting out the breath she had
been holding. “This place is a mess, so I’ve asked Kris to gather some of your
things, and we’re going to take you back to my house.”

Instantly, Toni’s eyes widened in fear, and she struggled to
get away.

“Goddamn it, Toni, will you please listen! I’m not going to
sit here and fight with you about this. Your flat is a wreck, and the front
door is broken. You cannot stay here. It’s
not
safe!”

Toni wondered how Laura could believe she was that stupid.
Toni knew it wasn’t safe. Although most had acted like she didn’t exist, or she
couldn’t hear or comprehend, she had heard every word. The constables had
offered apologies and asked for explanations. The medics had suggested drugs,
doctors and observation, and her two friends, or the ones that professed to be
her friends, stood by and listened intently. But none of them knew what had
happened. None of them understood. They were guessing. They were clueless. They
weren’t the one awoken in the middle of the night by the sound of splintering
wood. They didn’t smell the foul body odor mixed with alcohol and cigarettes
that permeated her flat when he crept inside. They had never experienced the
sheer helplessness of having no escape...again. They had homes, secure and warm
with thick doors to shut out the cold and the danger. She had nothing, at least
not anymore.

Toni felt Laura relax her grip, and for a second their eyes
met, and they both knew words were no longer needed. Sensing the argument had
ended, Laura got up and walked to the door, and looking back at the woman
cowering in the corner, she said softly, “I’m sorry, Toni, but you don’t have a
choice.”

Laura was halfway across the lounge before Krista caught up
with her. Grabbing her by the shoulders, Kris spun her around.

“Who the
fuck
do you think
you are speaking to her like that? Do you have any idea what she’s been through
tonight? She’s not just scared, Laura, she’s fucking
terrified
!
When I got here, she was hiding in the goddamn closet, for Christ's sake! I
called you because I thought you could help. I
thought
you wanted to be her friend. But I don’t think you know what that means. Rain
or shine, rich or poor, for better or for
fucking
worse, that woman in there is my best friend, and I will never give up on her,
but apparently
you
have! So why don’t you get
the fuck out of here before
I
take up where
she
left off!”

Although she was caught off guard by Krista’s outburst, Laura
couldn’t blame her. Laura’s day had gone from bad to worse and getting punched
in the face had been the last straw.

Laura had spent the entire day up to her armpits in
paperwork, followed by her argument with Toni and ending with her date with
George Portman. Prior to that night, she had only known George as an accountant
who worked for the Home Office, and after spending an enjoyable lunch together
while attending a conference, going out on a date seemed like a good idea. Not
an extraordinarily handsome man, he was of average height and weight, had
average brown hair and brown eyes, and drove an average car. Look up average in
the dictionary and you would see George Portman’s face. But he had a nice smile
and a hearty laugh, so when he called, Laura couldn’t think of a reason not to
accept his invitation.

Hindsight being twenty-twenty, when he showed up at her door
promptly at seven and then huffed when he found out she wasn’t ready, Laura
should have called off the date then and there. But hindsight is called
hindsight for a reason, so the date proceeded as planned…all the way down the
hill.

Laura liked coupons. She liked them a lot. They saved her
money on groceries, books and even greeting cards, but when it came to choosing
a restaurant, they had never been her first priority. It was your typical
sports bar, with a hundred flat-screen LCD televisions hanging on the walls,
each flickering with images of sporting events from around the world.
Sportscasters dressed in garish ties and loud jackets, had their words inching
across the bottom of the screens, and patrons sat with heads at odd angles,
trying to read each and every syllable.

Walking into the noisy pub, Laura looked down at the pale
green dress she had chosen to wear and sighed. It was a dress meant for a quiet
dinner and relaxing conversation amidst candlelight, and her shoes, although
modest in style and height, were meant for dancing the night away. As she
slipped into the booth, across vinyl cracked and repaired by strips of colored
tape, she found herself missing her trainers and jeans.

She didn’t plan to spend the evening watching sports in a
noisy bar, having little if any conversation with her date. She had wanted to
unwind, relax and have a few drinks, but George wasn’t interested in unwinding,
and he certainly wasn’t interested in drinks. A frugal man, he preferred water
with lemon, and as soon as they sat down, he ordered two, stating that alcohol
in bars was overpriced and overrated. Laura’s dinner selections were also
limited due to the crinkled coupon he proudly held in his hand, and reaching
over, he eagerly pointed to the six items from which she had to choose. It was
past eleven before he brought her home, tired, cranky and totally sober, and as
Laura walked up the steps to her house, there was only one thing on her
mind…the location of her corkscrew.

Closing the door on one of the worst nights of her life,
Laura opened a bottle of wine, poured herself a large glass and wearily trudged
up the stairs. Changing into her most comfortable pajamas, she settled under
her warm duvet for a much-needed rest. The horrible day had finally ended...at
least that’s what she thought. Two hours later, Kris called.

Laura felt like shit, and the pain in her jaw was the least
of her worries. She had let the anger of the day creep into the night, and Toni
had just paid the price. Her words and actions, no doubt, had done more harm
than good and there was no taking them back. Life doesn’t have a rewind button.

“Laura, did you hear what I said?” Krista shouted. “I told
you to leave!”

“Is that what you want to do, Laura...leave?”

Both women turned and saw Toni standing in the bedroom
doorway, her blue pajamas crumbled and askew, and her face pale and streaked
with dried tears.

“Toni,” they said in unison, both wondering if she had heard
their argument.

“Answer the question, Laura. Do you want to leave?”

Pulling away from Kris, Laura walked toward Toni. “No, I
don’t. I want to be your friend and help you through this, but you’ve got to
trust me. You’ve got to trust us. We care about you, Toni, and neither one of
us is going to give up. What I said in there, what I
did
in there was wrong, but I did it for all the right reasons.”

Toni’s eyes were glassy, filled with tears she refused to let
fall, but as she stood in the doorway looking back into faces filled with
sorrow and worry, she knew if she was to live again, she needed their help.

“My suitcase is under the bed,” she said in a whisper, and
then she turned, returning to her corner where she sat in silence while they
packed up her world.