Plain Paradise (13 page)

I should have known what he was coming to talk about
. “It has been a
hatt
situation.” Mary Ellen rubbed her forehead. “We just never spoke of it, and of course we took Linda in when you were away.”

Noah stood up from the couch. He didn’t look like a doctor in his blue jeans, loafers, and a bright yellow shirt—a “golf shirt” is what he’d called it in the past, which didn’t make much sense since Noah didn’t play golf. Noah always dressed that way when he worked at the clinic. Seemed to make people in the community more at ease when they saw him wearing it, as opposed to what doctors usually wore, either starched white shirts or those blue pants and shirts that looked like pajamas.

He tucked his hands deep into the pockets of his pants and paced for a moment. “Robert is the name of my friend.” He glanced at Mary Ellen. “His wife gave up a baby for adoption.”

Mary Ellen rose from the couch and walked toward him. “Why would they, Robert and his wife, do such a thing if they are married?”

“No, no.
They
didn’t give up a baby;
she
did. A long time ago.”

Mary Ellen tilted her head to one side and waited for Noah to go on.

“His—his wife’s name is Josephine.”

Mary Ellen put her hand to her chest and hoped that Noah wouldn’t confirm what she knew to be true.

“Yes, Linda’s mo—I mean the person who gave birth to her.”

“And you are friends with these people?” Mary Ellen’s brows leaned into a frown, and she knew that she had no right to feel betrayed, yet she did.

“I’ve been friends with Robert for weeks, but I only met Josephine last night when Carley and I ate dinner with them. I’ve been trying to help them—”

“I don’t want to hear.” Mary Ellen held one hand in the air, then turned her back to Noah. “I have to hear about Josephine from Linda, and it’s hard for me.” She covered her mouth with her hand, as if that would prevent her from spewing the vicious thoughts in her mind where Josephine was concerned. She’d given her baby away, and she should have respected that decision. Mary Ellen turned slowly around to face her brother. “Do you understand, Noah? Do you understand that her being here is a complete upset to our household? Not only was Linda upset, but Matt and Luke began to question whether or not I’d actually given birth to them, even after Abe talked with them. It’s just all been terrible, and I’m afraid . . .” She choked back tears.

“Afraid that Linda will leave to go be with Josephine and live in the
Englisch
world?” Noah put a hand on her shoulder. “That’s not going to happen.”

“How can you be so sure?”

Noah stared long and hard into Mary Ellen’s eyes. “Josie is sick.”

“What do you mean, sick?” Mary Ellen folded her hands in front of her.

“That’s what I was trying to tell you. I’m helping them get in to see a specialist at Lancaster General. It usually takes months to get an appointment to see Dr. Phillips, but I knew him well when I worked with him at the hospital, and he is doing this as a special favor. When Robert told me about Josie, I wanted to help, to make sure they’d utilized all their options.”

“What do you mean, this utilizing of options? What does that mean?”
And what is wrong with her?

“Mary Ellen . . .” He paused as his eyes saddened in such a way that Mary Ellen feared what he would say. “Josie is going to die within six months because she has an inoperable tumor on her brain. I want Dr. Phillips to have a look at her. He could be their last hope, and Dr. Phillips is a brilliant surgeon.”

Mary Ellen folded at the waist and grasped her knees. “Oh, no.” Her insides twisted in agony as a stab of guilt bore into her heart.

Noah wrapped his arm around her shoulder. “Mary Ellen, are you all right? I didn’t realize that you knew Josie that well, or at all. I mean, I know Linda will be upset.” He paused. “She just wants to know Linda while she has a chance. They moved here just for that reason.”

“Oh, no,” Mary Ellen said again. “Dear Lord, forgive me. Oh, Heavenly Father, forgive me.”

Noah latched onto her shoulders and forced her to a standing position. He faced her and said, “Mary Ellen, what is it? Tell me what’s wrong.”

“Oh, Noah,” she cried. “I’ve done a horrible thing. I’ve sinned a far greater sin than I could have imagined myself to do. Oh, Noah.” She leaned into his arms. “This is my fault. It’s my fault she’s dying.”

Noah pushed her away. “What? What are you talking about?”

“I prayed, Noah. I prayed to God to make her go away, to leave here, and—”

“Mary Ellen, listen to me. This is not your fault. Josie has been sick for a long time. Do you hear me? You didn’t have anything to do with her brain tumor.”

Mary Ellen sniffled and felt her guilt subsiding a little, but then she thought about the beautiful
Englisch
woman only a few years younger than her and how her life might be tragically cut short. Only moments earlier, she was wishing and praying for Josephine to go away, but never like this. Then she remembered the specialist and hoped her guilt would be even more relieved. “Will your friend, this Dr. Phillips, be able to save her?”

Noah sighed. “I don’t think so. But I want him to review her test results, just to be sure.”

They were quiet for a minute. Mary Ellen sat down on the couch, propped her elbows on her knees, and put her chin in her hands. “Linda finds out that she has a mother, only to have her taken away.”

“You’re her mother, Mary Ellen.” Noah sat down beside her.

Mary Ellen rubbed her tired eyes and sat quietly, thinking. Then she turned to Noah. “You will let me know about this meeting with Dr. Phillips, if he can help her or not?”

“Yes. I will.”

“Maybe we shouldn’t say anything to Linda until we know for sure.”

“I agree.” Noah paused. “Mary Ellen, do you think maybe it’s Josie’s place to tell Linda?”

Mary Ellen swallowed hard. “
Ya
, I reckon so.”

“I need to get back to the clinic.” Noah stood up and walked toward the door. Mary Ellen got up and followed him. “I just wanted you to know what’s going on. Linda might need you more than ever in the near future, especially if she gets close to Josie.”

Mary Ellen nodded, then thanked Noah for stopping by. After the door closed between them, she stood where she was and bowed her head.

Forgive me, Lord
.

8

S
TEPHEN HELPED
L
INDA ’S FATHER AND TWO BROTHERS
set up benches in the family’s den in preparation for worship service the following day. When Stephen’s family hosted worship, they removed a wall partition that separated a small den from a larger living area, but the Huyard’s den was exceptionally large and all the benches fit nicely after moving the couch and two rockers into another room.

As was tradition, they lined several rows of benches for the men facing one way and more benches for the women facing toward them, leaving room in the middle for Stephen’s grandfather, the ministers, and deacons.

Stephen poked his head into the kitchen and saw Linda pulling a loaf of bread from the oven. Someday, she’d be baking bread in a home they would share together, just as soon as Stephen could build up enough courage to ask Linda to marry him. He loved her plenty, that was for sure, and they were both planning to be baptized in the fall, but being married to Linda would mean that she’d see him without his elevated shoe on, hobbling around the house off-balance. She’d told him over and over that it didn’t matter to her one bit.

He smiled when he recalled Linda pulling her dress up slightly above her knee to reveal a birthmark she’d had since birth, an oblong circle of red that ran a good four inches up her leg. “See, I’m not perfect either,” she’d said.

But she was perfect. Warm, loving, beautiful, and a great cook. He’d eaten plenty of meals with the Huyards since he and Linda had started dating a year ago, and many of those meals Linda had prepared. She was going to make a wonderful wife, and Stephen knew he needed to just go ahead and do it, ask her to be his
fraa
. They would publish their announcement in the paper and most likely wait until the following November or December to get married, when they were both almost nineteen and after they’d both been baptized into the faith.

Stephen helped Luke shift the last bench into place just as Linda rounded the corner into the den.

“Looks
gut
.” She folded her arms across her chest. “And I finished all my chores.”

Good
. Stephen was ready to have some alone time with Linda. He playfully raised one brow in her direction and waited until Luke was out of earshot. “Let’s get out of here.” His eyes met with hers, and he couldn’t wait to hold her in his arms, kiss her again.

“I can’t. Josie is picking me up at three. Didn’t I tell you?”

Linda had filled him in about her time with Josie, but he couldn’t recall her saying that she was spending Saturday afternoon with her. He was pretty sure she hadn’t or he would have remembered, but he tried to mask his disappointment since he knew all this was hard on Linda.

“I’m sorry.” She reached up and touched his arm. “But we’ll see each other here at worship tomorrow.”

“
Ya
. It’s all right. I know it’s important for you to get to know this woman.”

She kicked at the wood floor with her toe and tucked her chin. “I guess. It’s just all strange.” Linda lifted her face to his, gazed into his eyes, and pressed her lips firmly together for a moment. “I just don’t know what she wants from me. I mean, she’s nice enough and all, but I have a mother.”

“Maybe she just wants to be your friend.”

“That’s what she says.” Linda tilted her head slightly to one side. “Do you think it’s okay to be friends with her?”

“
Ya
, I reckon so.”

“I think we’re gonna go eat and go to a movie.” She shrugged. “Which I guess is all right since I’m at the age to do these things.”

Stephen nodded, disappointed he wouldn’t be spending the afternoon with Linda, but glad that she seemed to be handling this news about her mother much better than she had in the beginning. He thought back to her uncontrollable sobs when she’d first told him.

“Want to walk me to my buggy?”

She smiled, and he hoped there would be a good-bye kiss in store for him, but when they got out to the buggy, Linda’s aunt and uncle, Katie Ann and Ivan, were just pulling in.

“It wonders me what brings them out here.” Linda brought a hand to her forehead and blocked the descending sun as they pulled in. “We see
Onkel
Samuel and
Aenti
Rebecca, and even
Onkel
Noah and their families all the time, but we only see
Onkel
Ivan and
Aenti
Katie Ann at worship usually.”

“Why do you think that is?” Stephen whispered as Katie Ann was climbing out of the buggy.

Linda shrugged. “I don’t know.” She waved her hand. “Hi
Aenti
Katie Ann and
Onkel
Ivan.”

Katie Ann lifted a brief hand in Linda’s direction, but kept her head down as she walked toward the house. Ivan trailed behind her and smiled briefly.

“
Mamm
said she thinks they’re sad because they don’t have no
kinner
,” Linda said after her mother let them into the house. “They’re old not to have a family.”

“Hmm.” Stephen zoomed in on Linda’s lips again. Then he gently pulled her toward him. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” He quickly brushed his lips against hers, and the feeling sent the pit of his stomach into a wild swirl. He couldn’t wait to make Linda Huyard his wife.

Josie was anxious to see Linda, and she’d spent way more time than probably necessary planning out their afternoon. She reached up and fondled the cross necklace and wondered if Linda would be wearing hers too.

Linda was waiting in the yard when she pulled in, and Josie was glad to see a smile on her face as she crawled into the front seat.

“I have that same necklace.” Linda pulled her necklace from beneath the collar of her dark blue dress.

Josie smiled and waited for her to buckle her seat belt before she pulled out. “I know. I bought mine that day at the market in Bird-In-Hand when I saw you purchase one just like it.” She glanced briefly in Linda’s direction. “I hope that’s okay.” She shrugged. “I guess I just wanted us to have something—something the same.”

Linda smiled. “It’s fine. I’m glad we both have one.”

Josie was happy to see Linda relaxed, and she had high hopes for the afternoon. “I thought we could go see a movie, and then, if it’s all right with you, I’d like for you to meet Robert.” Josie couldn’t wait to introduce Linda to her husband. After Carley and Noah had left the other night, Josie and Robert stayed up late talking about Linda and what a wonderful day Josie had with her daughter. And Robert had apologized for bringing up the subject of adoption in front of Noah and Carley, although they both agreed that it was best to know that Noah was related to Mary Ellen and Linda, especially in light of the friendships that were forming.

While Josie thought Carley was nice enough, she had no plans to get close to anyone. Only Linda. What was the point anyway?