Plain Paradise (11 page)

“
Daed
, is it true?” Luke leaned forward into the front seat. “Is Linda really not our sister?”

Abe twisted in the seat to face his youngest son, whose eyes were filled with tears. “Linda will always be your sister. No matter what.”

“I don’t understand then.” Luke’s bottom lip trembled.

Abe looked at Matt, who was staring straight ahead, his lips pressed firmly together. Matt always hid his feelings with anger, so Abe wasn’t surprised at his reaction. He focused on Luke as he spoke.

“Your
Mamm
and I tried to have children for quite a while. When the Lord didn’t bless us with any, we began to think that perhaps we just weren’t able to have any
kinner
. Linda’s birth mother was seventeen and pregnant at the time, and a lawyer made an arrangement for us to raise Linda as our own.”

Matt kept staring straight ahead, but grunted. “
Ya
, I reckon someone should have mentioned this before now.”

“Does Linda know yet?” Luke’s voice trembled as he spoke.

Matt spun around. “Aren’t you listening?
Daed
said she’s with that woman now.”

“Matthew, that is enough. You watch that tone of voice. Do you hear me?” Abe leaned forward toward his son.

Matt turned back around and stared straight ahead. “Yes, sir.”

“Linda’s my sister.” Luke held his head up high. “No matter what.”

Abe smiled. “That’s right. Nothing is going to change.”

“Everything has changed.” Matthew shook his head, and Abe knew that his oldest son was taking this harder than he let on. When Abe saw Matt’s bottom lip quiver, he reached over and laid a hand on Matt’s shoulder.

“I know you boys are hurting right now. Your
mamm
and I are hurting too. But this will take a toll on Linda more than anyone, and I need you boys to be strong for her. She is still your sister.”

Abe faced forward, grabbed the reins, and flicked the horse into motion. He looked forward, but he saw Matt swipe at his eyes.

He knew his boys were strong young men. It was just going to take them a little time. That’s all. Time.

We should have told them all sooner
.

But for now, there was nothing else to say. Abe raised his chin and kept his eyes straight ahead.

Josie pulled the car to a stop in front of Linda’s home, sad that their time together was coming to an end.

“
Danki
for showing me all the pictures and for buying
mei
lunch at Katie’s Kitchen.” Linda reached for the handle on the passenger door, but first turned to Josie and smiled. “And for letting me put on some of your perfume.”

“You’re welcome.” Josie’s mind was spinning. There hadn’t been enough time. Linda pushed the car door open. “Linda?”

“
Ya
?”

Josie couldn’t say anything for a moment; it was like looking into a mirror seventeen years ago, except that Josie would have been wearing blue jeans, a T-shirt, and her hair in a ponytail, but Josie recognized herself in Linda’s face for sure. “Would you like to do something on Saturday? I don’t really know what’s allowed, and I wouldn’t want to do anything to upset your parents. I guess movies aren’t something you can do, or—”

“I can.” Linda’s face brightened. “I’m in
mei rumschpringe
, so I can go to movies and do things in the
Englisch
world.”

“Want me to pick you up around noon?”

Linda tapped her finger to her chin. “Would you mind if we made it around three, so I’ll have time to finish my Saturday chores?”

“Sure.”

Linda smiled, then pushed the door open and stepped out of the car. Josie watched her walk up to the house, unfamiliar feelings rising to the surface and filling her with a love she didn’t think she’d ever known.

As Linda tiptoed into the house, an overwhelming feeling of guilt overtook her. She’d had a good time with Josie and found her to be kind, generous, and fun to be around. Linda liked the way she smiled, too, the way she looked. She was pretty, and Linda couldn’t help but wonder if people thought she was pretty too, like Josie. She sniffed her wrist, the spot where Josie had sprayed the sweet-smelling perfume.

“Hello.”

Linda jumped when she heard her mother speak to her from the bottom step of the stairs. She was holding a broom, and more guilt consumed Linda as she realized that her chores fell on her mother today. Linda crossed the den and reached for the broom.

“I’ll finish up. I’m sorry I was gone so long. I didn’t know—”

Mamm
pulled the broom back. “No, no. I’m done, and no harm done. Let’s sit. I want to hear all about your day with . . .” She paused. “What is that sweet smell?”

Linda could feel her cheeks reddening. “Josie let me try a little of her perfume.” She held her wrist up, just in case her mother wanted to get a better whiff. She didn’t. Linda followed her to the couch and took a seat beside her.

“Did you go to Katie’s Kitchen?”

“
Ya
, we did. Anna Marie was our waitress.” Anna Marie was Ben and Martha King’s daughter, and Linda had grown up with her.

“Did you tell Anna Marie who—who you were dining with?”

Linda shook her head. “No,
Mamm
.”

Her mother let out air she’d seemed to be holding. “What else did you do?”
Mamm
clenched her lips tight, and Linda wasn’t sure how much to say.

“Not much.” She shrugged.

Mamm
twisted on the couch to face Linda. “Linda, you don’t have to be afraid to share with me.” She looked down. “Or, if you’re not comfortable, I understand.”

Linda didn’t say anything for a moment as she tucked her chin. Then she looked up to see her mother waiting for some sort of response. “She’s nice.”

“
Gut
.”

This was the first time Linda had ever felt awkward talking to her mother, and it was the one time when she felt like she needed her the most. “She has the fanciest house I’ve ever seen,
Mamm
. And it’s big.” She paused and checked her mother’s expression.
Mamm
smiled, but not a full smile. “She’s married too. But they don’t have any other—I mean any children.”

Her mother nodded, then her eyes warmed, and Linda’s stomach settled a little bit. “You’re very pretty, like she is.”
Mamm
pushed back a strand of hair that had fallen from beneath Linda’s
kapp
.

“I always thought I looked like you,” Linda said sheepishly. “That’s what everyone always said.”

“
Ya
, people have always said that. They say you have my cute little pug nose.” She playfully poked Linda’s nose. Linda smiled.

“
Mamm
.” Linda reached for her mother’s hand. “You should have told me a long time ago about Josie.”

Her mother twisted her head and stared at the wall to their left. “I know.”

“But nothing is going to change. I love you. You are my mother and will always be my mother.”

Mamm
kept her head turned toward the wall, but reached up and swiped at her eye. When she turned to face Linda, all Linda wanted to do was crawl in her lap like she’d done when she was a little girl and have her mother stroke her head, the loving way only a mother can. When
Mamm
opened her arms, Linda folded into them, and they both held each other for several minutes.

“She wants to see me again on Saturday afternoon,” Linda said after a while. She felt her mother instantly stiffen, and she wondered if perhaps she’d forbid her to go.

“I suspected that she would want to spend more time with you.”
Mamm
eased out of the hug, cupped her hand under Linda’s chin, and said, “And that is all right.”

Linda felt relief, but there was something about the way her mother spoke that made Linda suspect that it wasn’t as all right as
Mamm
let on.

Josie had a spring in her step that she didn’t remember having for years, and it had been a long time since she’d used her fine china and set the table in the formal dining room, complete with candles and fresh flowers. She stepped back to inspect her work.
Perfect
. She heard the front door open, glad that Robert was on time. She had so much to tell him. The timer on the oven dinged, and she headed back to the kitchen. She pulled the pan from the oven just as Robert entered the kitchen. She looked up in time to see him glance into the formal dining room.

“I take it things must have gone well today.” He placed his briefcase on the kitchen counter, waited for her to put the pan down, then wrapped his arms around her.

“Oh, Robert. It was a perfect day.” She buried her head in his chest and squeezed him tightly.

He gently eased her away. “Josie, I’m so glad, and I want to hear all about it, but I have some news for you.”

She arched her brows. What could possibly be more important than her news?

“Remember Dr. Noah Stoltzfus, the doctor who put me in touch with some people at Lancaster General regarding Amanda?”

She nodded.

“Well, Noah also knows someone whose specialization is the type of inoperable tumor that you have.”

No, no. Don’t ruin this day
. She pulled away, turned her back toward him, and combed a hand through her hair. “Robert, I don’t want to see any more doctors. I’ve seen plenty, and they all say the same thing.”

Robert gently spun her around, cupped her cheek, and gazed lovingly into her eyes. “Just one more, Josie. Please. Do it for me.”

Josie twisted her mouth to one side, then the other. “I thought Dr. Stoltzfus ran a small clinic and catered mostly to the Amish community.”

“He does. But he used to work at Lancaster General, and he has friends there. You know how hard it can be to get an appointment with a really good specialist. It can take months.” They both looked at each other, and there was no need to verbalize what was on both their minds—how many months? “Please,” he said again, his eyes begging her. He kissed her on the cheek. “I invited him and his wife for dinner. Can we set two more place settings?”

Josie pushed away from him. “Robert, why didn’t you give me any warning?” She thrust her hands on her hips. “And I have so much to tell you about my day with Linda, and . . .”

“I know, baby. I tried to call all the way home and kept getting ‘call failed.’ . . . And I want to hear every little detail about your day with Linda. I’m so happy for you. But I think it’s important for you to meet Noah. I’ve met his wife several times when I’ve been at his clinic. I think you’ll like her.”

Josie let out a heavy sigh. “I guess I don’t have much choice. Let me go get two more place settings.”

Robert gently grabbed her arm. “Hey, come here, you.” He pulled her close again, cupped the nape of her neck, and whispered, “I’m not giving up. Do you hear me?”

Josie eased away and looked him in the eyes. “This was such a good day for me, Robert. I just want to share it all with you, and I’m so tired of talking about medical stuff.”

“Tonight, over a glass of wine, after our guests are gone, I want to hear every little detail of your day with Linda.” He paused with pleading eyes. “But let’s hear about Noah’s specialist. Please.”

Josie forced a smile for Robert’s sake. She’d accepted her fate years ago. It terrified her, but she’d accepted it. Robert hadn’t. “I hope they like beef parmesan and fettuccini,” she said in a pouty voice.