Shhh... Gianna's Side (21 page)

Who had Mack been all along? She never knew me
, and I sure as hell never knew her.

I wanted to scream and make a scene and cause havoc all around me
. All the walls were tumbling down and they were bleeding.

Bright red, filled with lies, deceit, and sadness.

I rubbed off the mascara that was dripping down my chin. Tears I hadn’t noticed were streaming.

I knew then that nothing would ever be the same again. I went from loving Mack to hating her. It happened in a blink of an eye as I heard my father bring her to orgasm.

The very last words that left his mouth shook me to my core.

“I love you.”

“Shut the fuck up!” I screamed, as I stood up. I felt like I was a string and was being pulled, manipulated to the max.

He laughed. “Why? I was enjoying the story. It’s all in good fun, Gia. Look at me when I talk to you.” I narrowed my eyes at him.

“Much better. Mack’s having a good time,” he ridiculed, moving close to her to pull her hair as she tried to get away. He didn’t let up and grabbed her with one hand on the back of her neck, placing her where he wanted.

My fingers were twitching. I stared both of them down and witnessed as he placed her directly in front of him
, slowly moving his hand to her lower abdomen.

“
You want to know how I know? I bet her pussy is wet,” he taunted, with his fingers moving closer to her core.

I didn’t answer, I watched in slow motion as my past and present collided with each other. 

His fingers moved with ease to the center of her legs. “I win! She’s fucking soaked,” he growled in her ear and tightened his hold around her neck.

The fact that she was getting off on the day that my youth and innocence
were heartlessly taken away from me made me want to hurt her. And to watch as James touched her so intimately like he knew her sweet spots, crazed me. My blood was boiling. Had he fucked her while we were there?

I closed my eyes
, trying to take away the image of them being together, but it was just replaced with my father’s hands caressing her nub.

“
McKenzie’s pussy feels amazing…maybe I should fuck her right in front of you, Gia? Do you want me to bring your friend to orgasm just like your daddy did? Hmmm,” he groaned.

I
opened my eyes and they immediately locked with his, they were primal. I watched as he kissed down the side of her neck and he never broke eye contact with me. I looked down and caught him circling her clit with the same enthusiasm he had done to me and the string snapped. I heard it snap clear as day as I witnessed her body convulsing from her orgasm, the orgasm that he delivered.

I couldn’t take it anymore and
I charged at her with the years of hate I had built up. I did not see Mack. I did not see my best friend. I did not see my sister. I only saw the hate, lies and secrets. The betrayal. I saw a friendship built on nothing but secrets. Secrets that destroyed us. Lies that ate us up.

I saw what I hated to admit.

I saw G.

He
saw me coming and smiled cunningly, stepping away before I pounced on top of her like she was my prey. I had been waiting for this moment for as long as I could remember and it didn’t disappoint. Mack’s body fell to the ground with a thud with my body right on top of hers. She let out a whoosh sound and I was on my knees with a closed fist hitting her directly in the face. The impact immediately shifted her face to the right and my hand throbbed. I ignored it.

I hit her again and it landed on her cheek, she screamed that time and it only egged on my need to physically hurt her. My hands latched on to the top of her head and I pulled her hair to slam her head into the concrete floor over and over again. Both of us screamed at the top of our lungs. Her hands moved on top of mine and she dug her nails into my skin until I bled and had to let go. Once I did
, she flipped us over with ease and I guarded my face, knowing it was her turn to come at me.

“
Fuck! I’m sorry, Gia! I’m so fucking sorry!” She attempted to move my arms from hovering over my face and I fought with all the strength I had to not look into her eyes.

“Fucking look at me, Gia. LOOK AT ME!” she yelled, making me try even harder to shield myself.

“Fuck you!” I replied in a hoarse tone.

The scene erupted into more screaming and thrashing around until Mr. Nichols got involved and held my hands above my head. I tried to wiggle and move away from both of them to no avail.

“Time to stop hiding, Gianna. Listen to your best friend as she grovels and begs for your forgiveness,” he whispered close to my face gripping onto my wrists and holding them tighter.

“Shut the fuck up
!” she yelled, trying to hold my legs down.

I kicked and flayed around
, trying to loosen their holds on me.

“
I’m not done playing! The shows not fucking over, Mack. Tell your
best friend
how much you loved fucking her dad. Tell her how he was always hard around you and would often take you to a secluded corner to fuck you silly. How you would only dance for him when he was in the stands, his obvious erection peering through his lust filled eyes,” he revealed, making me scream in pure agony and torture.

“
Don’t think people didn’t see you. It’s not like you guys did a very good job at hiding it. I saw the day he fucked you on school grounds without a care in the world that his wife would catch him, or better yet, his daughter! ‘Kyle,’ you moaned over and over again,” he groaned, enjoying the turmoil he was causing.

“I always wondered if your mom knew, Gia. She went on a fucking crusade to crucify me, getting all the community and reporters involved. Why? I know why…it wasn’t because her precious “daughters”
were raped. It was because it made your daddy finally pay attention to her. She was able to have good ole daddy’s attention. Your parents watched you like a hawk after what you guys claimed. It brought them closer. The truth is, you guys getting ‘raped’ was the best thing that ever happened to their marriage. Gia’s mother knew it. She took her frustrations out on me in court and then let daddy fuck her later. Women know shit like that and I’m sure she knew something was going on. She may have not known it was Mack, but she had to know he was fucking around on her.”

She had tears streaming down her face and I knew she was imaging my father with someone else and it caused her pain. Her cheek was bruising and there was blood on the corner of her lip. Her tongue grazed the cut and she hissed in pain.

She loved him.

She loved him as much as I loved James.

“This is bullshit! You act like I’m the only one to blame, Gia? Look around you! We’re in a padded room because of you and what we did! For what? For nothing!” she spewed. “Not one fucking reason! For what, Gia! Why? What were we thinking when we decided to do what we did?”

“Get off me,” I shouted through gritted teeth.

“What?” she answered, confused.

“GET OFF ME!” I yelled. “It was my idea! It was NEVER your idea! It was all part of the plan. I hated you! I wanted to hurt you just as much as you hurt me! You were part of the plan just as much as he was,” I vindictively divulged.

He laughed, “Ooohhh…secrets, secrets…Gia’s up now! Tell Mack about how you planned it all. Tell her how you were pissed that she was fucking your daddy that you set out to punish her. It’s your turn, now,” he ordered, egging it on more. 

“Gia?” she questioned, getting up and backing away.

“Yes! You were part of the plan, Mack,” I taunted, spitting blood to the dirty floor. “That day you wrote your name on my paper was all part of it. The day you agreed to write my name on top of your page was the day I smiled. I would have the last word.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?”
she asked, pulling her swollen lip into her mouth.

“Your little friend here, made sure you got caught,” Mr. Nichols chimed in. He was enjoying this. The fucker was enjoying every second of it.

“What do you mean?” she asked, glaring from him to me.

“You see, Mack,” Mr. Nichols chanted, getting up and letting me go. “
Gia didn’t write her name on the other test, she wrote yours and that’s how you got caught. Gia made you go down with her, she wanted you to lose everything, just like she had. Isn’t that right? Am I missing a piece of the puzzle, Gia, baby?” Mr. Nichols beamed with self-satisfaction while my mind thought about that day.

I left the office and walked home. I made it into my shower before I crouched to the floor in agony. I cried and cried and then cried some more. The devastation was overwhelming; it was an emotionally shattering sense of loss that I experienced on all accounts. The illusion of security or false sense of safety was shattered. I started to listen to the destructive thoughts, where there were only feelings of humiliation followed by real sadness over my losses. Everything was taken away from me.

My best friend.

My father.

My family.

My soul mate.

I bawled and let go of all the illusions and fantasies I had. And after what felt like hours I turned off the shower and grabbed the towel from the counter. I wrapped myself up and went straight to my bed. I lay there and stared at my pruned skin for hours. Not knowing whether to cry, scream, or laugh. I woke up the next morning the exact same way. I felt like I had aged years in one night. I dressed and went to school. I avoided Mack all day, feigning a headache. She let me have my desired privacy.

I dreaded going to sixth period and I almost skipped
, not being able to face him.

“
Miss Edwards,” he addressed as the class walked out. “I need to discuss this paper with you. Please stay after class.” I didn’t move from my seat and when everyone had exited the room, Mr. Nichols shut the door. He didn’t even walk back to where I was sitting in the back of the class. He leaned on his desk and sighed.

“We can’t do this anymore, Gianna.”

He called me Gianna. No longer G.

I never moved my gaze from his
. “And why is that?”

He crossed his arms, “Where do you want me to start…you know why we can’t.”

“I thought you loved me,” I stated.

His eyes glazed over, James was back. “I do. You know I do. But I’m your teacher and you’re my student. We can’t keep doing this. It’s wrong.”

I cocked my head to the side. “Was it wrong when I had your dick in my mouth a few days ago? Because you never stated it was wrong when you came in my mouth and ordered me to swallow.”

He put his hand on his forehead in a frustrated gesture
. “Jesus Christ, Gia.”

“What
’s wrong, Mr. Nichols? I’m just repeating what you said. I’m sort of confused. You know, since I am your student and all.”

He finally walked over to me and got down on his knees in front of me
. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, placing his hand behind my neck and his forehead on mine. “We can’t do this anymore. We shouldn’t have ever gotten started in the first place. It’s my fault. Not yours. You are a beautiful girl and you have so much ahead of you.”

“What if I want you?”

His other hand grazed my cheek. “It’s not possible.”

“Why?”

“I just told you, Gianna.”

“Stop calling me that…why do you keep calling me that? It’s me. You know who I am,” I agonized.

He sighed, “We can’t. I can’t anymore.”

I looked him right in the eyes
. “Are you sure it has nothing to do with your wife?”

He hesitated
. “No. It has nothing to do with her.” I nodded.

He lied. As if he was telling me a bedtime story

His eyes never lied to me.

Liar, liar, liar, I wanted to scream.

“I’ll always cherish our time together, and if things were different- ugh, I mean…if I weren’t- if you were just a little bit older. It would be so much different,” he explained.

I jumped out of my desk and jumped on him, I threw my arms and legs around him, holding him close and not wanting to let him go. He wrapped his arms around me and I turned my head to breathe in his smell.

“Please don’t leave me. Please. We can work this out, and we won’t have to be intimate until I gradate from school. Please, just give me a chance. Give us a chance. Please. Please don’t do this…” I shamelessly begged. I felt every bit the little girl I knew I was portraying.

He kissed my neck and nuzzled my shoulder. I reveled in the feel of him. “I can’t, Gianna. I hope you understand. One day when you’re older
, you will understand that we don’t always get what we want, it doesn’t matter how much we want it.”

“Please
,” I openly sobbed. “I love you. I love you. I love you.” I repeated, praying it would make a difference.