Stay (18 page)

             
He tenses at my words. The hand he’s holding keeps getting tighter and tighter before he pushes me away from him so he can look directly in my eyes with his menacing evil glare.

             
I can feel his breath in my face and it makes me want to vomit. I wince a little because he’s starting to hurt my right hand with the force he’s applying.

             
I don’t let my eyes show the discomfort I’m in and as soon as I am about to whimper because I can’t take it anymore, a voice comes from behind me.

             
“May I cut in?”

             
I immediately go stiff.

             
That voice, I know that voice but it can’t be. It just can’t.

             
I stand there frozen until I feel Zac pull away to stand beside me still holding tight to my waist.

             
My mouth hangs open as I come face to face with the man that has haunted me since that night in college when I first met him. Jason.

             
I blink several times to make sure I’m not just dreaming. I look at him up and down without caring who is watching me.

             
He looks the same except the expression in his eyes looks different. Last time I saw him his eyes were haunted and guarded.

             
I don’t know if I can tell what they are trying to tell me now because of all the time that has passed by, but it seems like there’s a little bit of hope in them but hope for what?

             
He still has the same deep blue eyes that I fell in love with so many years ago. With those long blondish eyelashes, same buzzed hair, same full set of lips, and that same smile that used to drive me wild with want.

             
My mouth goes dry.

             
I don’t say anything and neither does Jason. His eyes don’t waver away from mine but I feel Zac tense against me and it brings me back to earth so I look over at him. I see him giving Jason the evil eye he usually just gives me when he’s about to throttle me.

             
I try to jerk away from him but he digs his fingers into my waist to hold onto me tighter.

             
“No, actually, you can’t.” He spits out.

             
I look over at Jason again, still not believing he’s standing in front of me.

             
He doesn’t even flinch at the hatred in Zac’s voice.

             
His eyes keep watching my every move, “Just one dance, I promise. I just want to reconnect with an old friend.”

             
There’s a slight smirk on his lips as I flash him a questioning look but I still don’t say anything. A friend? Really? That’s what we were?
Jeez!
I guess I really am a total tool for believing there was anything else between us.

             
I quickly push those thoughts away. I feel eyes on us so I know Zac and Jason are starting to make more of a scene at my best friend’s wedding.

             
Suddenly, Zac tugs at my arm hard enough this time to leave a bruise.

             
“We were just leaving so, no,” he states angrily, turning on his heel and dragging me off the dance floor.

             
I’m still in shock like an idiot but I manage to turn my head around.

             
I see Jason standing there with both his hands clenched into fists sending murderous glares at Zac.

             
He quickly catches my eye and I see the sadness in his…maybe even matching my own. The sadness I’ve felt for all these years without him. Or maybe I’m seeing things again, like I always have when it comes to us.

             
What the fuck is going on? Where did he come from? Why now? After so many years, why come back into my life now? I still don’t understand what he’s doing here. Why did he want to dance with me?
So much for letting go…

             
I look away from him to regain my composure.

             
As Zac is leading me towards the exit I search for Magda and I finally see her with Jesse walking towards Jason.

             
She knew?
She knew Jason would be here and didn’t tell me? I’m gonna fucking kill someone. How could nobody have told me? He can’t just come waltzing back into my life with no explanation and pretend like nothing happened between us. He can’t just open up old wounds and pretend like he never left any. That is so shady.
I need to get out of here.

             
I feel like I’m about to cry when it dawns on me—that day at the Sports Corner and just now at the table, Magda was going to tell me about Jason being here but we kept getting interrupted.

             
I snap my head back up to look at Zac and this time I tug my hand away and push off of him hard enough that he has to let me go.

             
We both stop and he leans over me while I’m rubbing my wrists. “We are leaving now! I’m not in the mood for your shit!”

             
He tries to take my wrist again so I slap his hand out of the way.

             
“I am not leaving. This is Magda’s wedding and it’s not over yet,” I defy him.

             
I also need to find out why Jason is here now, after four years of being off the grid. What does he want?

             
I look around to find I have no idea how we ended up in the living room of Dan Engle’s—Jesse’s boss-- house from the back yard where the reception was being held at, but we did.

             
I look back at him and shove my finger in his chest. “If you want to be a prick, that’s fine. Leave--ALONE. I’ve had it with YOUR shit!” I scream angrily.

             
At this point I don’t take in my surroundings very well but I know that I can still hear the music which right now is my jam—‘Stay’ by Miley Cyrus—I’ve always thought that it’s been the theme to my and Jason’s “relationship”.

             
I have to say that girl is fucking crazy as shit but that song is legit. I don’t care what anyone says about that bitch…that song makes up for it.

             
Anyway, I also hear laughter filtering in from the outside so I try to find my way back there but I come to a sudden stop when Zac grabs me by the waist and lifts me up so that I don’t touch the ground.

             
“Let me go!” I yell.

             
I try to turn towards him to punch him anywhere but his grip is deadly as he starts walking through a long hallway.

             
He turns his face towards me before whispering in my ear, “You better be careful, Alex, or your lover boy will only be finding pieces of you when he comes after us,” he threatens.

             
I stop fighting because I’m more than livid now at his stupidity.

             
“Do it, Zac, I dare you! Just do it and get it over with. It’s what you try to do every day of my life anyway. I die on the inside each day knowing that I have to even look at you. I‘d rather be dead than live the hell I’m living with you now…”

             
Suddenly he stops and drops me to the ground. I grab onto the wall so that I don’t land on my ass but he pulls me back towards him immediately. He then shoves me into the other side of the wall.

             
My head hits it first and those yellow little lights that I always see start blurring my vision.

             
I can feel him caging me up against the wall with his whole body.

             
“Don’t tempt me, pretty girl,” he seethes.

             
I shake my head to regain my focus, which I do for a little bit. I take my hands which are at my sides and shove him as hard as I can on his chest.

             
To my surprise he stumbles back into the wall behind him—
must be the alcohol
.

             
He glares at me before continuing to threaten, “Don’t think that I’m going to let you go back to that fucking sorry ass douche out there! I know who he is and he’s not going to have you. I’ve told you before, Alex, I own you! You’re MINE!”

             
I slap him hard across the face.

             
“The only douche here is you and this is the last time I’m going to tell you, you don’t own me! You never have. That man out there has always held my heart, my soul, and my life…everything that I have has always been his. I married you because he wanted me to move on and you were the one that was supposed to help me do that. You were the one that was supposed to heal the wounds that he left behind when he disappeared but instead you became this monster that no one knows you are and made me love him even more for not being anything like you. I hate you! I will hate you for the rest of my miserable life with you. I want to ask for a divorce on a daily basis but I know you won’t give it to me. But at this point I don’t care. I’m out! I can’t do this anymore! I’m filing for divorce whether you like it or not and it’s over! You can find someone else to use as your punching bag because this one is leaving your ass!!” I yell, feeling a weight lifted from shoulders now that he knows the truth.

             
I turn on my heel to walk away and I start to hear loud voices coming around the corner. I start towards them but I get turned back around by Zac only to come face to face with his fist.

             
I hit the wall first—again—then I slide to the ground as blood starts filling up my mouth.

             
I rub my jaw and spit out the blood before I look up at him and snarl, “Had to get one last one in, huh?”

             
I get up using the wall but he grabs my arms to hold me in place up against the wall—again--before he punches me right in the stomach, making the air gush out of my body.

             
He lets me go and my knees buckle so I fall to the ground holding on to my stomach. I gasp for air as I clutch onto my stomach.

             
He bends down to get close to my face, “I’m never giving you a divorce, I’ll kill you before that. Simple as that, pretty girl.”

             
I try to find my voice to tell him to fuck off but nothing comes out. 

             
He starts to stand me up but this time it’s up against a table of some sort that I didn’t even realize was in this narrow hallway we are in.

             
He pushes me against it and as his fist collides with my face—again—I hear it first before I feel anything. Just a huge thud as I hit the side of the mysterious table and then the floor.

             
I immediately see darkness and feel an enormous amount of pain everywhere especially my head. I’m not able to move at all but I know that I can still faintly breathe and hear what’s going on around me.

             
I hear Magda screaming and Jesse comforting her while at the same time it seems like Jason is beating the shit out of Zac.

             
I lay here next to that table feeling like there is something draining from my body. I assume its blood gushing out of my head from the blow.

             
Out of nowhere, I feel someone kneeling by me touching my face and my hair.

             
I can’t make out what that person is saying until I focus in on the voice. Once I do that, I figure out it’s Jason.

             
I try to move but I can’t, it’s like I’m still conscious but not.

             
I hear his panicked voice, “Stay with me, baby. Please, stay…please. Baby…I’m so sorry. I’m sorry. I’m asking you now, stay, please?” He pleads to no avail.

             
Through sobs I feel his hands rub my face.
I’m trying, Jason…I’m trying. Don’t let me go!

             
I cry inwardly because I don’t know what’s happening. I can hear him and feel him but I can’t do anything about it.

             
I start to fade into the darkness again when I will myself to open my eyes.

             
To my surprise, they do, only about half way.

             
I can clearly see Jason now, looking down on me with tears running down his face.

             
“Keep your eyes open, Alexandra…please—keep them open…” He begs softly.

             
I try to reach for him so I can touch him one last time but I have no strength left. I can feel my breathing slow and my eyes involuntarily shut.