The Darker Side of Mummy Misfit #2 (20 page)

I poured Rick a glass of wine and he downed it in one, pushing his glass across for another.

“The thing is Libby, it’s a really good job and she’s prepared to pay a fortune.  With the amount of people she knows it could lead to heaps of other work.  I just don’t know how I’m gonna manage juggling work with caring for Mikhail and we can’t
keep
asking you to look after him - he can be pretty draining, I know.”

And it was literally in that moment that the answer came to me, almost as if it had been there all along.

“Rick, Rick!  I’ve got it!  How do you fancy having a couple of lesbians move in with you?  Olga would be the perfect nanny for Mikhail - he loves her - and she’s desperate to get away from Lydia.  It’s a match made in heaven.”

Once Rick got his head around the idea and said he’d discuss it with Nic, we spent a good while laughing about the prospect of Mikhail being brought up by two gay daddies, a lesbian nanny and her live-in lover.

“Well, we’ve never been ones to do things conventionally, have we Libby?  He’ll probably grow up to be the most well-adjusted kid in his class.”

Think my idea was ingenious and I just hope Nic sees it as the perfect solution.

I really don’t think I could take another day of baby-sitting, my head is pounding!

Thursday 22
^nd
January

Don’t think Ned was overly impressed with my idea - just mumbled words like “poor little sod” and “no bloody normality”.  Once a homophobe always a homophobe, I guess - not sure what he
actually
said because I wasn’t listening to him.  I find my mind is often away doing its own thing lately.

But I don’t give a shit about what he thinks because events moved quickly overnight and it’s all been decided anyway.  Olga will be working for Lydia until the end of the month and then start with Nic and Rick.

Think it might be best if they keep the news of where she’s moving on to from Lydia, as I’d hate to think it might jeopardise Rick’s contract with her - the amount she’s paying him is quite phenomenal.

Olga called me this afternoon and I’ve never heard her so happy.  “I am so chuffing chuffed.  I cannot begin to tell you how much dis vill change my life.  I von’t be living viz de vitch anymore.  Sank you so much Libby.”

See, I can’t be
all
bad.  I do nice things and I’ve made four people and a baby very happy.

Just a shame I’ve got such a miserable husband.

PM

Left miserable husband to babysit while I went for a jog.

Oh, didn’t I mention I’d taken up jogging?

Well I have.  I jogged down to the corner of the road and sat in Dan’s car with him for half an hour.

How can my head be so clear when I’m with him and so muddled when I’m not?

Friday 23
^rd
January

Ned had already nodded off with Max in his room by the time I got back last night so I didn’t have to worry about not looking ‘post-jog’ sweaty or knackered.

I did have ‘the glow’ about me though, which was a slight worry.

I keep telling myself that Dan and I are just friends and he’s helping me over a tricky patch.  It doesn’t matter that we never talk about my miscarriage, he just makes me feel attractive again and that helps.

And we only kissed once last night - and I tried not to enjoy it, I really did.

Oh shit!

Saturday 24
^th
January

We went to see Skunk and Silver’s new flat last night.  Olga came to babysit (a quid quo pro freebie) and we collected Mrs S and headed off in a cab.  She was so excited to be out and about on a Friday night and she was clutching her shopping bag of Babycham, wine and her house-warming gift.

Their new place is great - very individually decorated, as to be expected, and Mrs S had bought them some great astrological star sign place mats which she proudly told us she’d got on eBay for “bargain price of three pounds and twenty five pence.”

Skunk and Silver were raving about them and saying what a great gift-buyer she was and Silver reset their tiny kitchen table so that we could christen them.

“I was being very clever on eBay,” Mrs S told us. “Just like you taught me Skunk, I was waiting until the very last second to place my bid and then I was in like Flynn.  I am getting so very quick now, nobody beats Mrs Sengupta when she is really wanting something!”

The meal was great and we all settled with our drinks in their small but cosy sitting room - Mrs S on her fifth Babycham and a little on the tiddly side.

My heart missed a beat and my hands went decidedly clammy when she suddenly said, “I am very much thinking that I know a little secret that you might all be interested in.  I don’t want to upset you, Libbybeta, but I feel it is best out in the open.”

It’s true what they say about a guilty conscience being your downfall because I could feel my face blushing and my mind racing with the effort of trying to come up with hasty excuses to defend myself.

All the while I was thinking, how could she possibly
know
?  And I hadn’t actually done
that
much to feel guilty for, had I?

I was just about to do something totally daft like ask her if she needed a wee wee - in much the same way as I might distract Max when I know he’s about to say something dodgy in company - when she went on, “Yes, I am thinking that I may be welcoming a new daughter-in-law into the Sengupta fold.  Pritesh has been seeing that lovely Patience and I am very much approving of her.  I am sorry, Libbybeta, but you may have missed your chance.”

Looking back, I think my relieved expression may have been a little OTT because I can still see the rather perplexed and suspicious expression on Ned’s face and the bemused exchange of looks between Skunk and Silver.

How do people manage to have full-blown affairs?  Not that I need to know for a reason, I just don’t know how they do it - that’s all.

Sunday 25
^th
January

A very quiet day with Ned and me avoiding one another and making small talk for Max’s sake.

He suggested I book flights for us to go to the villa in Tuscany for half term and I said I’d get it organised.

“It’ll do us good to get away from everything for a bit, Lib.”

He didn’t give me a reason but I could almost hear the unvoiced questions which hung over him - he knows that something is up.  We know one another so well, it would be impossible for him
not
to pick up on my vibe.

But he wouldn’t like the answers and I don’t want to admit to anything.

I just want everything to go back to normal but I don’t know what that is anymore.

Monday 26
^th
January

Had a catch up with Fenella and Patience at pick up and Patience finally admitted to dating Pritesh.

“Oh God, he’s the first man I’ve been keen on for years but he’s just so
decent
.  He keeps saying that, when the truth comes out, everyone will be implying that he’s only with me for my money.  I don’t give a flying fuck that he’s only got his shop in Wembley.  I
really
like him and he’s so good with Solomon.”

Fenella and I were just reassuring her when Gestapo appeared and sidled up to Patience.  “Hi!  I hear you’re enjoying my leftovers.  Doubt if he’ll ever be in a position to help you out with the school fees though - white goods don’t pay
that
well, as I discovered for myself.”

She left the three of us speechless for once - Fenella’s brain must be weighed down by pregnancy blubber because even
she
couldn’t think of a rebuff.

PM

Had a call from Patience and she said that at the next CCL meeting she wants it to be announced that it was her father who stumped up the money.

Looks like it’s time for the truth to come out.

“I just want to shove it up the lot of them,” she said.  “And Pritesh is just going to have to learn to act like a grown-up.  Either he wants to be with me or he doesn’t.”

Oh boy, I just hope this all works out the way she hopes it will.

Tuesday 27
^th
January

Fenella is absolutely delighted that we can finally do the ‘big reveal’ and is champing at the bit for word to get out.  “I just think it’s going to be a delight to watch the turnaround.  They won’t be able to stop themselves and they’ll all end up looking like the shallow cows they really are.  Classic!”

Just a bit concerned that Patience may get her heart broken in the process and I voiced this to Fenella.

“Sweedie, I’m a firm believer in what’s meant to be.  If he’s worried about a bit of gossip or too proud to be with a woman who has more money than him, then he’s not worthy of her.  It’ll sort itself out in the end.”

I suppose she’s right.  I wish I could share
my
problems with her and see if she could sort those out as easily.  But mine must remain locked away inside because I don’t think Fenella would like me very much if I told her what was going on right now.

PM

Went ‘jogging’ again tonight.

Dan wants us to go away somewhere for a night but I just don’t know that I can do that.

Part of me wants to - just to see if my dormant body is re-awakening - but the other part of me knows that then there really
would
be no going back.  Right now I still have a marriage to try to save but if I take this any further I don’t know where that will leave us.

One thing I
do
know is that I’ve taken to locking my diary away in a drawer.

And I
never
used to do that.

Wednesday 28
^th
January

Ned informed me last night that he’s going away for a week on Monday - business in Paris.

The most worrying part of it is, I was more concerned about the temptation this might put in
my
way than I was about whether or not
he’d
get up to something.

He also added “The break might do us good, Lib.  Absence makes the heart grow fonder and all that.”

Could almost hear him silently adding, “And you might appreciate what you’ve got more when it’s gone.”

PM

Had a quick chat to Nic and he’s been counting the days until Olga moves in at the weekend.  “I had no idea live-in nannies were so cheap, Lib!  She’s going to be an absolute Godsend, I can tell you.  She was here last night to have a look round the flat and it was almost as if Mikhail sensed she was coming - he stopped the bawling and grinned the minute the door-bell rang.”

Told him if Lydia-Boss-Lady ever finds out that I was guilty of orchestrating the hostile takeover, she’d be likely to have my guts for garters.

Nic laughed and added, “Well if Rick’s description of her cellulite-encased thighs are anything to go by, you’d have to have a fair bit of gut to make your way round those beauties.”

Glad to hear that he sounds so happy and relaxed again - even if it does mean I may have the Meemie Mafia on to me.

Thursday 29
^th
January

CCL meeting

Fenella and I met for coffee/hot chocolate to prepare for our meeting tonight.

I arrived back at her place after dropping the kids at school, to find her still in her dressing gown complete with red and white polka dot wellies.

“Footwear was about the only change of clothing I could manage today, Lib.  But I’ve put some mascara on in your honour.”

Told her I hoped she’d find the energy to get fully dressed before tonight’s meeting and she assured me she would.

“Oh yes, Libby, I’ll be there in all my tent-like finery as we set the wheels in motion.  I’m just wondering how long it will take before the news spreads and we see the full extent of the reaction.”

And I’m just hoping Patience hangs onto the man of her dreams through all this.

Friday 30
^th
January

Yesterday’s meeting went well and delivered in every way we expected.

When I announced who the generous benefactor was, Hinge & Bracket twittered and fidgeted in typical H&B fashion and Letchy took a sharp intake of breath - Patience had suddenly become even
more
attractive.

Shergar, Barbie and Dress-up Mummy exchanged looks and I could almost see the desperate desire in them to be the first to get to their mobiles and put the news out there.

Or was it the desire to be the first to become Patience’s new best friend, who knows?  But it was clear to us that they were happy for the meeting to come to a close as quickly as possible - that’s a first in itself!