The Zombie Combat Manual (17 page)

OVERVIEW:
As good an improvised long-range weapon as the landscape shovel, if not better, the sidewalk scraper is composed of a wide, flat blade attached to a pole approximately four to five feet long. This implement is traditionally used by maintenance crews and building superintendents to scrape blemishes and sticky refuse such as chewing gum from the pavement. The potential lethality of the scraper is evident in frigid northern climates, where this tool is also used to break apart sheets of ice that form after a winter storm.

The forged, spadelike blade is thin and sharp, making it an excellent tool for targeting the fragile bone structure of the nasal/orbital region on the zombie skull. Warriors skilled with this weapon can cleave off the top of a ghoul’s head cleanly with one well-placed thrust. The scraper can also be swung like an axe to attack the temporal or occipital regions of the skull.

Like many of the improvised pole-based weapons mentioned previously, the sidewalk scraper can be found with either a wooden or synthetic handle. Given a choice, it is recommended that you choose the latter. Although slightly more expensive, the durability of the synthetic handle far outweighs the added cost. Even given the added price, this weapon is still roughly a tenth of the cost of a professionally crafted polearm.

WEAPON EVALUATION: SLEDGEHAMMER

EFFECTIVENESS: HIGH
LIFE SPAN: 200+ ZOMBIE ENGAGEMENTS
SKILL LEVEL: VERY HIGH
AVAILABILITY: COMMON
COST: INEXPENSIVE

OVERVIEW:
A construction tool that needs no introduction, the sledgehammer is an implement frequently used for breaking concrete, driving spikes, and demolishing structures. Given its inherent use in destructive tasks, it is highly regarded as a powerful weapon against the living dead.

At face value, the sledgehammer seems like it has many attributes in its favor as an improvised weapon. At the end of an extended handle is a steel striking head weighing anywhere from eight to twelve pounds. Higher-quality models feature a fiberglass shaft and a drop-forged alloy head. In the hands of an experienced combatant, the sledgehammer can make quick work of an undead skull.

The liability of this weapon lies in the ability required to handle it effectively. The sledgehammer is considered a “commitment weapon,” indicating that once you launch a strike with this tool, you are fully committed to executing it. Given the sledgehammer’s weight and top-heavy structure, it is very difficult to change speed or direction midstrike. It is also a comparatively slow weapon and may be difficult to use against undead groups of five or more, where speed of elimination may be key to survival. Users of this weapon also need to be cautious of the “splatter effect.” If a strike smashes into its target with a high degree of force, the zombie skull may fragment, scattering bits of contaminated bone and tissue outward, possibly toward unsuspecting humans in the surrounding perimeter.

WEAPON EVALUATION: CROWBAR

EFFECTIVENESS: HIGH
LIFE SPAN: 200+ ZOMBIE ENGAGEMENTS
SKILL LEVEL: MODERATE
AVAILABILITY: COMMON
COST: VERY INEXPENSIVE

OVERVIEW:
One of the most popular improvised weapons, second only to a baseball bat, the crowbar has a prominent standing as a solid, satisfying hunk of metal that can be swung with a high degree of force and accuracy. The crowbar’s length, heft, and lethal hooked ends make it quite effective in medium-range zombie engagements. It is also a very practical improvised tool because of its low cost, its high availability, and its usefulness during a siege of walking cadavers. In the moments following an outbreak, you may indeed find the need to pry open boxes and force open doors in addition to caving in a revenant’s skull.

Using this tool as you would any melee weapon, attack any vulnerable region of the cranium with the curved prongs on the crowbar. Just as with any hooked weapon, be watchful when using the arced tips so that it does not become jammed in an undead skull and pulled from your hand.

As the crowbar is little more than a dowel of steel with a curved edge, this improvised weapon benefits greatly from customization efforts. The smooth metal surface of this tool may make it difficult to grasp should it become coated with water, blood, or undead fluids. It is suggested that you wrap a more comfortable grip on the weapon, making it easier to wield in combat. See additional customization options later in this section.

The Toolbox

Though not everyone will have access to a farmhouse or a garage in their search for improvised weaponry, nearly every family unit has a collection of items in the home to tend to small repairs and domestic tasks. Look closely at your toolbox, and with a warrior’s eye, you will note how many common household items can function as weapons against the living dead. Some of the more obvious examples include the following.

WEAPON EVALUATION: SCREWDRIVER

EFFECTIVENESS: HIGH
LIFE SPAN: 100+ ZOMBIE ENGAGEMENTS
SKILL LEVEL: VERY HIGH
AVAILABILITY: VERY COMMON
COST: VERY INEXPENSIVE

OVERVIEW:
Perhaps the most mundane of all domestic tools, the ordinary screwdriver can be found in nearly every household. With proper training, however, this simple implement can function as a superior close-combat tool if a suitable edged weapon is not available. Because of its stout construction and piercing capabilities, it may be a preferable choice over an actual combat blade, and is certainly less expensive.

The same principles for choosing an edged weapon should also be applied when selecting an appropriate screwdriver for zombie combat. Ensure that the shaft is of adequate length to penetrate the skull and reach brain tissue if driven to the hilt under the zombie’s chin. Find one that is of solid, single-piece construction that does not have an interchangeable or removable stem—the last thing you want to do is to extract the shank with your fingertips after it has remained embedded inside a ghoul’s skull poststrike. It is also preferable to employ a flathead rather than a Phillips-head screwdriver in undead combat, as the level, angled blade supplies better penetrating power and can be sanded down to a sharper edge.

WEAPON EVALUATION: CLAW HAMMER

EFFECTIVENESS: MODERATE
LIFE SPAN: 100+ ZOMBIE ENGAGEMENTS
SKILL LEVEL: MODERATE
AVAILABILITY: VERY COMMON
COST: VERY INEXPENSIVE

OVERVIEW:
Like the everyday screwdriver, it is rare to find a toolbox that does not contain some type of hammering tool among its items. Typically used to pound nails or extricate them from wood, the claw hammer has a solid metal striking face that can do enormous damage from a blow of sufficient power, while the opposite prong ends can embed themselves deeply into the undead skull.

When it comes to selecting a claw hammer for undead defense, there are a wide number of variations to consider. Your best choice is a model whose head and shaft are both forged from a single piece of steel and whose handle grip is wrapped in a resilient, shock-absorbent material. Avoid variants with wooden handles where the metal head is affixed to a wooden shaft; after prolonged undead combat, the fragility of wood may succumb to splitting and cracking.

Exhibit caution when using this particular improvised weapon against an undead attacker. A claw hammer averages fifteen inches in length, shorter than your typical melee weapon. This requires you to draw in closer to your opponent than typical melee engagements, thus increasing the likelihood of being snared by ghoulish hands. The claw end of the hammer is also at risk of remaining trapped inside the skull cavity of your opponent.

WEAPON EVALUATION: CHISEL

EFFECTIVENESS: HIGH
LIFE SPAN: 100+ ZOMBIE ENGAGEMENTS
SKILL LEVEL: VERY HIGH
AVAILABILITY: COMMON
COST: VERY INEXPENSIVE

OVERVIEW:
A specialty implement designed for a specific task, the chisel is most frequently used to carve wood, metal, or masonry. Its unique design also makes it a formidable weapon against the living dead, provided you adhere to particular selection guidelines.

The stout blade of the chisel is designed to chip away at its intended material when struck on the end with a mallet. This makes the fundamental structure of the tool extremely resilient, and ideal for undead combat encounters. A hammering blow to the skull with a chisel can easily penetrate bone with little accompanying damage to the blade. The design is so robust that custom knife makers often use a similar “chisel grind” to shape their combat blades. Higher-quality Japanese chisels are forged in a similar fashion to samurai swords, with a lamination of softer metal around a hard steel core.